Here For You
by StephtheWriter
Summary: After 11 years of something missing, both Shelby and Rachel find themselves finally a part of one another's lives. No longer as the imagined mother and daughter, but a true parent-child relationship.
1. Fate on Your Side

**My first Glee fanfic! For everyone who is waiting on Through Thick and Thin, I am starting the next chapter now. I recently went through a death in the family and a break up which is why writing has taken a back seat. So sorry!**

Shelby Corcoran was a respected teacher, an award winning glee coach, a loving aunt, a wonderful friend and sister. She had recently gotten out of a relationship, but was content in her newfound singleness. She owned her own home, and lived a comfortable lifestyle.

Yet, Shelby was missing one thing. It was the only thing that kept her up at night. It wasn't her Glee choir responsibilities. It wasn't bills, and money. Those aspects of her life were of no consequence to her. Those nights when she couldn't sleep was when Shelby thought of one person. One particular little girl. Her daughter. Or, at least, she considered the girl she gave up her daughter.

Shelby wondered what the girl looked like now. Did she like to sing? Was she tall, short? Quiet, loud? Shelby would gaze up at her ceiling and imagine every detail. She wouldn't admit it to anyone, but those nights as she stared at the ceiling, she would imagine what a day in the life with her daughter would be like.

Truly, that's all she had to work with. Her imagination that is.

Because her daughter wasn't hers. Her daughter belonged to Hiram and Leroy Berry. She had attempted to find them on facebook, but there was no sign of them on the social media site. She had found them through google though.

Hiram was one of the best lawyers in the city, and Leroy a hedge fund manager. They lived in New York. Both of their company biographies mentioned they had a daughter, but never her name. Selby's heart ached to know about her eleven year old daughter. But it soothed her to know that her fathers' were well off and had the means to take care of her.

But today was Wednesday. Hump day. The middle of the week, and per usual, Shelby was a master at compartmentalizing her emotions. She walked into the main office after school, her heels clicking in place, to pick up old AP exams for her juniors to practice on.

She was a no nonsense teacher and taught the advanced English courses This year she was also tasked with two periods of a non honors sophomore course, but she was finding that those kids were just as enjoyable to teach. She just had to modify her strategies.

Once Shelby walked in she heard a commotion in Principal Figgins office, but tried to ignore it as she headed towards the skinny brunette, Sophie Olvera, one of the secretaries.

"Hey Soph, do you have those exams?" She asked.

Sophie did some digging in her bottom drawer and smiled as she handed them over.

 _"_ _Are you KIDDING me?! Damn it!"_ They both heard come from Figgins office.

Sophie looked up at Shelby's concerned and quizzical look, "That's Ron Thompson screaming." She whispered at the teacher.

"The football player?" Shelby rose an eyebrow.

The secretary nodded, "He might get pulled from the team for grades apparently. His mother and sister are in there too. They just bombarded Figgins office." Her voice was low, knowing that this was juicy gossip that she shouldn't be spreading.

Shelby knew the sister. Lindsay Thompson. The girl was one of her students.

Lindsay was a sophomore and in cheer. The girl was pretty popular, could be bitchy at times, and was not particularly fond of English class. Shelby wasn't surprised at all that she'd be in there fighting for her brother. At the end of the day, Lindsay seemed like a loyal girl that you'd like to be on your side, rather than against it.

 _"_ _No! That's bullshit Figgins!"_ Came Lindsay's voice and it made both Sophie and Shelby crack a smile.

 _"_ _Lindsay Denise Thompson, language!"_

"That must be the mother." Shelby noted with a small chuckle.

Sophie nodded enthusiastically, "I don't think Figgins has gotten more than rebuttals out. He's drowning in there."

The teacher frowned sympathetically as they heard him spousing some words to the family, "Poor guy." Shelby muttered.

Sophia clucked her tongue with judgment, "And that woman just left another little girl, probably nine or ten years old, outside the office."

"Well the poor mom must probably be overwhelmed." Shelby pointed out.

The secretary shrugged, "Well I heard the child sniffling so I went out and handed her some water and a tissue. It looked like she'd been crying."

"How long have they been in there?"

"I'd say an hour."

Shelby's eyes grew, "That child has been sitting out there alone for an hour crying?"

"I know, my thoughts exactly." Sophia commiserated.

Shelby shook her head, "I'm gonna check on her."

Sophia watched Shelby leave the office on a mission. She sighed and went back to typing on her computer. The woman wasn't surprised. Shelby had a definite soft spot for kids, and had the biggest heart for them out of all the teachers. The very idea of a kid being alone and sad made Shelby cringe.

The teacher walked towards the front entrance of the office and opened the door. She looked to the left and there on the bench was a short, skinny girl. She had on a purple headband around her long brunette locks. She also wore a white sweater with the silhouette of a dog sewed onto the center, a skirt, white knee socks, and mary janes. It was an adorable sight to Shelby, but the moment she saw the tiny girl sniffle and wipe her eyes, the teacher frowned.

For some reason it made her heart sag a little to see it. More than a scene like this usually would.

Shelby walked over silently, "Are you okay sweetie?"

The preteen looked up startled and wiped her eyes and nose with the back of her hand. A blush rose to her cheeks. "I-I'm o-okay." She spoke through a hiccup.

Shelby sat down next to her tentatively, and took out two tissues from her oversized purse, moving around the exams that she had placed there "Here, take these." The teacher spoke warmly, "Don't use your hands honey, that's unsanitary."

The small girl nodded sadly and blew her nose, scrunching the tissue in her hands afterwards. She liked that the woman called her honey and sweetie. She only heard those from her Uncle on occasions, but not usually from anyone else.

Shelby studied the girl. Why did she look so familiar to her? A strange familiar. "How long have you been out here for?"

The girl kicked at the air, since her legs didn't reach the floor, as she was leaned all the way back on the bench. Shelby noticed new tears form in her eyes, but an angry scowl form on her face "A long time! I don't wanna be here no more!" Her cries renewed.

Just as Shelby was about to open her mouth to say something, out came Mrs. Thompson and her two children, Lindsay and Ron, from the office. They were bickering loudly amongst each other, but it came to a stop when the woman yelled for her niece.

"Rachel!" Her voice clearly exasperated. She turned to her children, "You two, be quiet. Ron, I'm not too happy with you right now."

Shelby watched Rachel scowl at the woman.

"Let's go Rach." Mrs. Thompson said to the small preteen.

Rachel shook her head at the woman, "No! You dragged me here Aunt Carrie! My daddies were supposed to call me. I was supposed to be at home to talk to them!"

Shelby stood up awkwardly, not knowing what to do.

"Ms. Corcoran? What're you doing with my cousin?" Lindsay asked her teacher surprised, meanwhile Ron just scoffed and mumbled he was going to wait in the car, and Mrs. Thompson stalked over to the livid sixth grader.

Shelby was about to answer when Rachel's aunt stood right in front of them, visibly annoyed.

"Rachel, let's go. Leave this woman alone."

"You leave me alone!" Rachel cried, as she wiped tears from her face.

Mrs. Thompson unceremoniously lifted the small preteen up by the arm, "We're leaving now, young lady." She ordered.

"Ow!" Rachel yelped, "My arm!"

"Whoa!" Shelby's protective instincts kicked in, "M'am that wasn't necessary-"

Carrie stopped and stared at Shelby while Rachel fought away from her and went towards her cousin. "Rachel can you fucking chill. Mom's already mad!" Lindsay hissed at Rachel.

"And who are you?" The angry woman spit at the teacher.

"She's my English teacher, ma!" Lindsay piped in, "Can we go now?"

Shelby looked at Rachel whose arms were crossed and was pouting by her cousin. Carrie Thompson just scoffed at the glare that Shelby was giving her.

"Mrs. Thompson I'm normally not one to intrude in family matters. But your niece is upset and I don't think the way you just manhandled her is helping her." She pointed at Rachel whose tears were freely coming down.

"I would stick to your normal way of behaving and butt out of family matters." The woman retorted, not fazed at all.

"Maaaa!" Lindsay whined, "Please, leave it." She looked at her cousin, "God, do you see what you do Rachel."

"I just wanted to talk to them!" Rachel defended herself angrily, "I wanted to talk to my daddies. It's been such a long time!"

Mrs. Thompson turned around having had enough, "Rachel, your fathers didn't want to talk to you!" The flustered woman finally gave in and told her.

The little girl's eyes widened, "Wha-what?"

"Hiram called me and told me that they were too busy, so yes I brought you with me. I am not the bad one here. And I've warned you about your outbursts, young lady."

The comment cut through Rachel and her lip began to quiver as heavy tears started to fall down her cheeks.

Shelby's heart stopped when she heard that name. She watched as Mrs. Thompson gave her one last glare. Then stood by as Carrie grabbed Rachel by the upper arm and led her out of the school, warning her under not so muttered words to calm herself or else. Shelby felt her heart tighten as the little girl disappeared with Mrs. Thompson and her student Lindsay.

See, Shelby knew that name. Hiram. It was attached to another name in her mind. Leroy. They were the fathers of the child she bore. The child that would've freshly turned eleven years old two days ago. She felt her world crashing. Far too confused and emotionally volatile, Shelby hastened to her own car.

Was that-could that sad little girl have been...her daughter? The woman's mind raced with all the information that she now had about the small child she had sat next to for five minutes.

Her name was Rachel. She had long dark hair. She was tiny, and dressed adorably. She was sensitive. She missed her 'daddies,' but they were too busy for her. She had a seemingly emotionally callous, or maybe just overburdened aunt who took care of her, and two typical teenage cousins.

Shelby's heart ached for that little girl. For Rachel. But was that really her daughter? Or was she jumping to conclusions?

There couldn't be too many surrogate children with two fathers, one of them whose name was Hiram….right? There just couldn't be.

But how? Why wasn't this girl with her fathers? Before, Shelby was able to maintain a sense of peace in knowing that her daughter was safe and loved. But if that girl she had just met was her daughter, then she was wrong about that. So, so wrong. And now all her worry came back two fold and trails of tears fell from her cheeks as her head fell into her hands and slumped against her steering wheel.

…. …. ….

Rachel curled into a ball on her twin bed, as she held onto her Clifford.

The girl's tears didn't seem to stop, and her aunt and cousins had grown tired of her sniveling. Both Lindsay and Ron were calling her a crybaby and so she went to the room that she shared with her cousin to suffer in private.

Lindsay wasn't very happy with sharing her space with the sixth grader, which Rachel figured was part of the reason that she could be so mean sometimes. It was hit or miss with her cousin Lindsay. Some days she was kind, other days, like today, not so much.

But, Rachel didn't particularly care about that right now. All she cared about was the fact that her dads hadn't wanted to call her. It had been a month already without one call from them. It had been a whole year since they'd shipped her off to Ohio, claiming that they were too busy, claiming it would be better for her to go stay with Hiram's sister, Carrie. The little girl knew that her and her dads never had a particularly loving bond. They made sure she was taken care of, had what she needed, but they were rather inattentive. Although whenever someone from their work came over they'd hug her and hold her on their lap. Rachel loved that, unfortunately once their client, co-worker, or potential investor got up from the table, couch, or chair, she'd be lifted off their lap in order for them to say their final goodbyes. Rachel knew that it was her cue to go upstairs and get herself ready for bed. Her dads would close the doors, turn off the lights and head to their room. Sometimes they'd yell a goodnight her way from the hallways, but that wasn't usually the case.

The poor girl's heart ached for attention that she never received.

Her aunt was not a cuddly woman either, and she always sided with her own children whenever a fight or argument broke out. At least it seemed like it to Rachel. But sometimes the woman's nice side came through. Like after Lindsay broke up with one of her boyfriends. Rachel pretended to be sleeping while her aunt held her cousin in bed, and rubbed her back until Lindsay fell asleep. The small girl felt a pang of jealousy and hugged her red stuffed dog harder. She wanted that too.

Luckily, the 11 year old had her uncle Larry who seemed to have grown smitten with her, as smitten as the very serious man could be. He would hug her when she seemed particularly sad and ruffle her hair a lot. He also once rocked her to sleep in his chair for two days straight when she was really sick!

The preteen sometimes dreamed about that moment. It was the first time she remembered feeling so much physical contact. Rachel loved her uncle Larry.

Her cousins were normal teenagers. They could be selfish and they were a bit indifferent to a lot of things. They loved their baby cousin, except Ron was nicer than Lindsay was. Both were loud, but Lindsay was the most argumentative with her parents. That was usually why she got into trouble. And the first time Rachel realized what her aunt or uncle meant whenever they'd threaten their kids with "Do you need a firmer reminder of who is in charge?" was after Lindsay had told her aunt to stop being such a bitch. The woman said exactly that and all Lindsay said in return was 'fuck off.' Ron's head snapped up and Rachel just stared stunned. Her aunt practically dragged her daughter to her room. Rachel was equally surprised when she heard Lindsay cry the words 'No mommy, no. I'm sorry!" from the room they shared some five minutes later.

Rachel had only heard Lindsay call her aunt Carrie 'mommy' when she got really sick with the stomach flu this one time, nor had she ever sounded that remorseful.

Ron looked at her cousin and sighed.

"What's aunt Carrie gonna do?" She asked, suddenly feeling sorry for her cousin.

Ron cleared his throat feeling a little self conscious himself, but realizing that Rachel was going to figure it out soon enough, "Mom and dad, they still, uhh, you know, spank when it's something serious."

The little girl's eyes widened. Her fathers never touched her. If she was being "annoying and insufferable" as they put it, or she did something wrong they'd lock her in her room for hours. Sometimes the whole day. They'd bring her food, but they wouldn't let her get out. Rachel started to hate her room because of it.

"They don't really do it unless we really fuck up. I haven't gotten it in like two years. Lindsay just has a big mouth and won't stop. If you hear them tell you the whole firmer reminder comment, either it's too late and you're dead or if it's attitude and talking back you just gotta stop or else you're gonna get it. Trust me."

Lindsay was really subdued after her punishment. Lindsay seemed younger to Rachel that day, more vulnerable. The preteen had watched her teenage cousin curiously, finding it so weird when Lindsay opted to spend the time she would on the phone or computer with friends, cuddled up with her dad, while he watched sports. It was like all the attitude and meanness had left her!

 _Maybe Aunt Carrie should spank her more often._ Rachel thought.

Her aunt had even gone into their room that night and tucked Lindsay in, giving her a hug that Lindsay clung to, despite the blush on her face, and a kiss on her forehead before bringing the covers up over her daughter. The woman was never one to tuck her children in, but Rachel realized that the spanking somehow temporarily changed the dynamics between mother and daughter.

Yet, Rachel's eyes couldn't help but water when, after having seen her cousin get tucked in, all she got was a "Goodnight Rach" from her aunt.

The girl dreamed about her mother that night. She got a kiss and a hug from the woman, and it meant the world to wake up having felt the affection, even if it was just a dream.

Rachel did her best to be as good as gold after her cousin's spanking. It took a lot for her aunt and uncle to get to that point of anger anyways, so it wasn't hard. The worst she got were time outs for her sudden outbursts or fighting, and her computer or phone taken away.

Another time, her cousin Ron had lied to his parents and gotten home reeking of alcohol and drunk. She watched as her uncle Larry swatted him up the stairs and ordered him to bed. The next morning Ron was as red as could be when he saw Rachel at breakfast, knowing that she had seen him get swatted like a kid her own age. But his dad had no qualms and was still furious. Carrie had gone to work that Saturday so it was just Larry and the kids.

"You're gonna eat your food and then go wait for me in your room."

"Dad-" Ron tried

The man put his hand up to silence him, while everyone else at the table tried to focus on their food. "You lied to your mother and I. So you're gonna own up to the consequences. We give you a lot of freedom, but you got too big for your britches and thought it was okay to be out there getting drunk. Did you think it was cool, huh? Did you even think of how dangerous it was? You drove back here!" The man almost roared. The fork squeezed in his wide hands.

Ron looked down, and shook his head.

"Well we'll see how cool you are over my lap young man." The father stood up from the table, not wanting to get any madder. He was about to leave when he saw the look on his niece's face.

He called Rachel softly, "Rach, come with me for a sec?"

Rachel looked at her cousin Lindsay who only shrugged at her, not knowing why her dad was calling her. The girl, feeling solidarity with her cousins gave her uncle a tentative shake of her head, "I, I think I'll stay here." She said in almost a whisper.

All the kids, especially Rachel were surprised when the father and uncle took a step towards Rachel's chair, turned it to face him, and then picked her up in his arms like he would a toddler. He did so because he knew Rachel wouldn't struggle. She would do what she always did in his arms. Snuggle into him. The then newly turned 10 year old was tense at first but he patted her back until she relaxed while they walked up the stairs, her legs finding themselves wrapped around his waist.

Once in her uncle and aunt's bedroom, Rachel was sat in her uncle's lap. These moments were few and far between for her, and she relished in the closeness.

"I don't want you to be scared of me." He started, "So I want to talk to you about what's gonna happen." He felt Rachel nod into him, "I know you heard Lindsay get spanked by your aunt Carrie two months ago, but nobody talked to you about it. And I wish we would've. You understand that this isn't something we always do, right? Only when it's something real, real bad."

"Are-are you gonna…will you do that to me? She spoke softly.

"Only if it's something real, real bad. Remember? Just don't go smart mouthing your aunt Carrie and calling her bad names like Linnie, and don't come home drunk like Ron. Can you do that for me?" He said with a small chuckle.

Rachel smiled, "That's easy. I can do that."

He kissed the top of her head, "Good girl."

Rachel grabbed the fabric of his shirt and played with it as he spoke.

"After I deal with Ronnie, do you wanna grab some ice cream with Linnie and me?"

Rachel nodded enthusiastically. She didn't know it, but Larry couldn't help but still see very much a little girl in those eyes of hers. He knew he was the kindest one to her in the house. Her cousins loved her, but were annoyed to death by her because she was so much younger and could be very opinionated. He knew that to some level Carrie resented the fact that her brother just left them to care for her. They were already strapped for money. One more kid wasn't helping. But luckily, the Berry's would send them a check for their Rachel related expenses. Although the simple stress of having another child in the home was a lot to handle.

But Uncle Larry was determined to make sure that Rachel, at least, felt safe and loved when he was around. Those damn Berry men did a number on her, and he wondered if the rest of the family understood just how deep that pain could go.

Unfortunately, while laying on the bed, after having been rejected by her father's, Rachel didn't have her uncle there to at least sit next to her, and right now all Rachel wanted was to talk to her dads. That was all she wanted. Why didn't they want to do that for her? Did they even love her? She had probably only heard that from them once or twice. The thought of being unloved made Rachel cry harder.

Whenever she felt like that, the little girl imagined her mom. The one that gave birth to her. She imagined how the woman would hold her. But thinking about it only made her more emotional.

"God, shorty, please calm down already!" Lindsay said closing the door, hearing the unmistakable cries of her baby cousin. She threw off her shirt and pulled down her shorts once inside the room they shared.

"Mom says you have to take a shower right after me, 'cause you had PE today."

Rachel just nodded and did her best to hold in her tears.

The teenager went to grab a clean pair of underwear and her pajamas then went into the bathroom that they also shared with Ron, leaving the eleven year old alone again.

Rachel turned onto her other side and covered her face with her hands.

"Shorty." Rachel heard a far away voice some time later, "Come on brat, wake up."

Rachel flickered opened her eyes and saw her freshly showered cousin sitting near her on the bed, "You gotta take a shower. Mom's gonna come up soon and I'm not in the mood to hear her nagging one of us." She offered her cousin a small smile, "You know how she gets."

Rachel sighed and wiped the sleep from her eyes.

"Sorry 'bout your dads." Lindsay muttered as Rachel got up. Her eyes bloodshot and puffy.

The preteen looked at her cousin, "Linnie, do you, do you think they're mad at me?"

The teenager sighed and shrugged as she laid on her bed and grabbed her backpack to do some homework, "Nah Rach. Uncle Hiram and Uncle Leroy are just busy people. You need to stop being so sad about it and just deal with it though."

"B-but it's not fair." Rachel squeaked.

"I wanted to be head cheerleader, but I didn't get it. Life's not fair. You just gotta be happy with what you have. "

"Yeah." Rachel muttered.

"And I'm Lindsay, not Linnie."

Rachel rolled her eyes, "Aunt Carrie and Uncle Larry call you Linnie. Why can't I?"

"Well I can't tell them anything, they're my parents. I'm still trying to get Ron to call me Lindsay at school. He's the worst. But it's Lindsay to you. I'm your elder, duh."

"Whatever _Linnie."_

Lindsay scoffed and threw a pillow at Rachel's direction, "Go shower, _crybaby._ " and without another thought Lindsay opened up one of her textbooks.

Rachel looked at her sadly before dragging herself into the bathroom. She wondered if her family would ever accept her for being overly sensitive, if she'd ever feel a parent's love, if her school peers would ever not make fun of her for the way she dressed and for being the youngest, if she'd ever feel like she belonged.

… …. ….

Shelby stared out at her classroom. She was still in a daze about yesterday and was doing her damndest to not stare at Lindsay. That teenager in the back texting could potentially confirm or deny her suspicions that had formed two days ago. She hadn't mentioned it to Lindsay and acted like nothing had ever happened. But Shelby was having trouble sleeping. The thoughts ate away at her. Was that little girl still crying about her 'daddies?' Was she okay? The woman wasn't sure if she was crazy. How the hell was she supposed to approach all of this?

"Okay everyone hand in you essays. Pass them to the front, and I'll pass out the Great Gatsby exams."

Groans and eye rolls emitted from her students. Shelby mimicked their exasperation, "I know. Such a horrible teacher to actually make you want to learn this stuff."

Once all the exams were passed out Shelby sat at her desk with the pile of essays in hand. She looked over at Lindsay once more.

 _'_ _Stop it Shelby!_ '

The teacher forced herself to focus and started checking off everyone that turned in their essays. Two were missing. One of them, Lindsay's. Shelby took a deep breath. Was this the universe giving her a chance to talk to the teenager alone?

After class Shelby stopped Lindsay and her other student, Mike. "You both haven't turned in your essay." She told the students sternly.

Mike, had the decency to look a tad sheepish, "Yeah, I, um, had soccer and couldn't finish it. Can I turn it in tomorrow?"

Shelby sighed, "You both know it's a 5% decrease every day it's late."

That made Lindsay's head snap up, "What? I'm between a B and a C. My grade'll go down!"

Shelby nodded matter of factly, "How much do you need to have done?"

Mike blushed, "Like, um," He wanted to lie, but the look Ms. Corcoran was giving him seemed deadly. "…Most of it." He finally eeked out.

Shelby sighed and then looked to Lindsay.

"I have like two paragraphs and the conclusion left."

"Is it saved in our class Google drive?" She asked them. Both of them nodded.

"I'll tell you what, both of you can come in during lunch to work on it. If you come in at lunch and you turn it in to me by 9 pm today, then I won't deduct points."

Shelby heard their enthusiastic agreement and waved them off to class. She secretly hoped that Mike didn't show up so she could get a chance to talk to Lindsay alone. Mike never really turned things in on time anyway and hardly took her up on the offers of leniency she gave the boy. Hopefully this time was no different. Did that make her a bad teacher? Honestly, at this juncture in her life, Shelby Corcoran did not care.

… … …

Lunch time came and Shelby sat at her desk, looking through the pages of Hiram and Leroy Berry that she could find online. Nothing mentioned that they had left their daughter in Ohio. But then again, why would that even have made the news? It was wishful thinking on Shelby's part to think all her questions could be found through a simple Google search.

A "Hey Ms. Corcoran." Interrupted Shelby's thoughts. The teacher looked up and saw Lindsay.

She smiled at her and had her sit down. She let the girl work for some time but her curiosity and need took over. "Hey Lindsay can you come here for a sec?" Shelby asked halfway through lunch.

The girl nodded and went over to her teacher's desk. Shelby looked at the teenager. How did she even begin? She couldn't just ask about Rachel. That was wrong. Wasn't it?

But she found an in when Lindsay spoke before her. "I'm sorry I didn't get the essay in Ms. Corocran. I was just helping my baby cousin with some stuff yesterday and it kinda got pushed to the back of my mind and then my mom was nagging me to go to bed."

"Well I gave you two weeks for a reason." Shelby sternly added. The girl nodded and mumbled out a 'yeah I know.'

"Is your cousin okay now? Considering you spent all your time with her." Shelby started tentatively, after the girl squirmed under her gaze. You wouldn't know it, but Shelby's heart beat sped up a bit as she ventured into Rachel territory, "She was the one I saw two days ago, correct?" She asked trying to delve into what she wanted to know.

The girl looked up, "She's fine. Just really emotional sometimes. My mom sent her to our room and grounded her for throwing a tantrum about her dads yesterday. She's been annoying about it since when you saw her, and she just kept crying and I tried to make her feel better and told her that I'd watch Mulan with her. It's her favorite movie. So you know I had to wait for the movie to end, but then it was too late to write the essay."

Shelby smiled at the girl's rant. It was a trait that she had noticed on the girl before.

She interrupted the girl to get her to stop, "That was nice of you, and don't worry I'm not going to penalize you as long as you get it done by 9 tonight."

"Thanks Ms. C." Lindsay said with a small smile.

"You know…" Shelby said, "Your cousin…she seems like she's going through a lot."

 _Please tell me more about her._ The woman actually thought.

Lindsay shrugged, "She's a drama queen. Don't worry about it. "

"Her umm-her name is Rachel, right? And I'm assuming she lives with you?"

"Mhm." Lindsay sighed, "She's been with us for over a year. Her dads shipped her to us, 'cause they were too busy for her or something."

Shelby felt her heart drop and she had to contain tears. "Are-are they far from here? Do you visit them a lot?"

"My uncles live in New York, so yeah far. And no we don't visit. They're pretty separated from us. They don't even call my cousin. It's been like a month. I kinda feel bad. She doesn't have a mom, even though she's dying to know who her surrogate was, and now her dads are like super busy. "

The girl then eyed her teacher strangely, "Ms. Corcoran, why do you care so much? It's kinda creepy."

Shelby felt her self falter, "I…" She took a deep breath.

 _You are Shelby Corcoran. Get a hold of yourself._

But she had just heard that Rachel's fathers lived in New York, combined with the fact that she already knew that one was named Hiram, Shelby felt a painful tug of her heart. This girl had to be her daughter.

Not only this, but her daughter wanted to know her just as much as Shelby wanted to know Rachel. It was the universe answering her prayers.

"I guess I can't get her sad face out of my head from when I saw her on that bench." Shelby smirked to add some lightheartedness to the conversation.

That made Lindsay snort, "Trust me Ms. C, don't let little Rachel Berry's pout get to you."

And there it was. Berry. Shelby's suspicion completely confirmed. A reality.

"So what'd you call me over for?" The teenager asked, not realizing that she had just turned her teacher's world on its head.

Shelby quickly fired off an excuse. She needed time to think. To figure all this out. At the very least, she wanted to talk to Rachel.

"Oh, right." She looked around her desk, "I just wanted to give you this book on sentence mechanics. I know you struggle with comma splices."

Lindsay rolled her eyes and grabbed the book from her hands, "Oh…thanks."

…. …. ….

The rest of the day had become a blur to Shelby. She could only think of her daughter. When she got home she checked the time. It was 3:00 pm. Thankfully, she did not have Vocal Adrenaline practice that day because the school required at least one day of rest. Too many of them had complained of exhaustion in the past. Weaklings. All of them.

But Shelby thanked all that was holy that she could go home and focus on the one thing that mattered. Getting into contact with Rachel.

The woman stared at her phone. She could do it. She could call Hiram up. He worked at one of the best firms in New York. The phone number was public information. The woman was still painfully aware of the contract that had forbidden contact with her daughter until Rachel was 18. The woman felt angry when she thought of the fact that they spent all that energy drawing up a contract to keep her away but now it seemed like they didn't even want her little girl!

 _Call Shelby. This is for Rachel._

The woman finally had the nerve to grab her cell phone, look up the firm's number and dial.

"Trinelli and Associates. How may I help you?" Came the polite and refined voice.

 _Breath. Remember to breathe._

"Yes, hello. I'd like to speak to Hiram Berry." Shelby replied, attempting to seem as confident as possible.

The woman on the other line opened up Hiram's list of clients, "Is he your lawyer?"

 _Shit._

"Umm. Yes. Yes he is."

"Okay, ma'am. Can I get your name please."

Shelby quickly lied, hoping it'd work, "My name is Shelby Corcoran. Though I doubt I'm in your records. He just told me to call and let you know to put me through. I met him the other day and described my situation with him."

The receptionist on the other line was skeptical. Mr. Berry was one of, if not, their best lawyer. He was in the running to become partner. He was not the type of professional to not alert her about a potential caller. He was very particular about who called him.

"Ma'am I'm sorry, but I don't think I can-"

"Please." Shelby said, her desperation almost showing through, "He knows me. Can you please just tell him that it's Shelby Corcoran. He will let me through. I promise you."

The woman gave a deep sigh and put Shelby on hold, "One moment please." Then called the lawyer's line, "Hiram Berry." Came his voice.

"Mr. Berry there is a Shelby Corcoran on the line. I told her she needs to be your client in order to reach you, but-"

Hiram felt his throat dry up at the mention of Shelby's name.

"You said Corcoran? Shelby Corcoran?"

"Yes, she insists on letting her through and I just wanted-"

"Let her through." He said rather roughly, then immediately softened his voice, "Please Jenny."

The man looked over at the picture frame on his desk of him, Leroy, and Rachel.

The phone started ringing once more, meaning the line had been transferred. The man stared at the phone and picked up after the third ring, "Hello?"

"Hiram." There was relief in her voice, "Hello? Hiram?" He hadn't answered and Shelby wondered if she was put through.

The lawyer cleared his throat, "What do you want Ms. Corocran?" He felt the nerves build up, "You're not supposed to be contacting us, remember?"

Shelby sat up straighter on her couch, "The contract had to do with my daughter. Not you and Leroy."

" _My daughter_ , Shelby." He spit back through his teeth, "NOT yours."

"I carried her for nine months."

"You were a surrogate." He reminded her, "A vessel for a child that was never yours Shelby."

"And clearly a child that you didn't want either."

Yes, she had gone there.

Shelby had hoped that this conversation would have been more civil, but it was clear that the way things were going it just might not be the case.

Hiram was taken aback. What did she mean by that? What did she _know?_

"What are you insinuating Shelby? Leroy and I love her, and I don't know what leg you're standing on considering that you know nothing about us!"

He made sure to not even speak Rachel's name. They hadn't named her until two days after her birth and never gave Shelby the benefit of knowing the baby's name.

The woman couldn't hold her anger any longer. Images of a crying little girl sitting next to her begging for her daddies came to mind. Images of an eleven year old with a purple headband, mary janes, and a dog sweater.

"I know that Rachel was sitting next to me crying because all she wanted was to talk to her fathers!" She said, "I know that you both left her."

"Ex-excuse me?" Hiram's voice rose an octave, "What the hell are you talking about Shelby? How have you been in contact with our daughter? I can have you arrested for that!" The man opened up a drawer in his immaculate desk and looked frantically for the copy of the contract.

"I didn't seek her out!" Shelby was beyond frustrated, angry, and just plain sad. "I work at the school that your niece and nephew go to. I found her crying on a bench one day, and your niece Lindsay mentioned her full name as I was talking to her today. That's when I realized who she was."

"You coerced my niece to get to Rachel!" He roared through the phone. Thankful for the fact that his office had thick walls.

"Are you listening to yourself?!" Shelby voice had risen as well, "I've told you twice that she's cried for you. I've told you she's been crying for days actually! And all you care about is a damn contract! I'm not trying to steal her from you. I am worried about her Hiram! I'm worried! And I want to know what is going on."

Hiram stopped himself from yelling any further. He realized she was right. It was true that they hadn't called. They're busy. Things come up. Rachel knew this. Or at least he thought she knew this.

"Look, I don't know how it ended up that you both are in such close proximity to one another. But Rachel is just being dramatic." He reasoned, "You don't know her the way we do. Rachel has always been a sensitive child. It drives Leroy crazy."

"I'm going to pretend that you didn't just explain everything away by boiling it down to oversensitivity." The woman seethed. How callous were these men? "I'd also like you to realize that while I am not in the business of taking this child from you, I do reserve the right of guardianship if she is taken out of your care for neglect."

"We have not neglected her! That would never stand up in court Shelby."

"Then tell my why she's living in Ohio with your sister!" Tears had made their way down Shelby's cheeks, "Why isn't she in the care of her two fathers?! The two loving men I thought I had given her to!"

Hiram heard the tears through her words. He laid back in his chair and gave a deep sigh.

"The truth. Please Hiram. Please."

The man felt caught. This woman had the potential of ruining his career. His husband's career. She had dirt on them now. He couldn't just ignore her, and so he decided on the truth. Then there was also that nagging part of his brain. The one that, before having essentially shipped Rachel off, thought of Shelby, and wondered if there was any way of getting into contact with her and seeing if they could send Rachel with her. It was a fleeting thought. One he never dwelled on because it had seemed impossible. Yes, Rachel had always asked about her mother. She would cry for her sometimes even, claiming that if she knew her mom, the woman would spend time with her unlike them. Leroy had not liked that comment. The girl wasn't allowed of her room that entire day.

But he never brought up this thought to Leroy. It just seemed unlikely that Leroy would even entertain the idea. Besides what were the chances of them even finding the woman?

Well, now the chances were a positive 100%. His thought seemed like a possibility now.

"She is staying with my sister, yes. But I send her a monthly stipend for Rachel's expenses. We cannot take care of her right now, but we make sure she has everything she needs. We're just busy and our lifestyle doesn't suit having a child. We haven't called her in a while. But we do text. I send her good morning and good night texts."

"Your-your lifestyle?" The woman sputtered, "She is 11 years old Hiram. Your _lifestyle_ should be that child! And there is such a thing as emotional neglect. You don't think she feels that? You are her parents for God's sake!"

Hiram sighed. He had always been the one more attuned to their daughter's feelings, but he could never bring himself to be so caring and affectionate towards her. At least not the way Rachel craved.

"Do you even plan on taking her back to New York?" Shelby asked with trepidation, after some silence. "What's your plan?"

Hiram, having had his emotions build up throughout the conversation, clenched his fists, "I don't know Shelby." He admitted, unclenching his fists. "I-I don't know. It's just-"

"Just what?" She prodded, more calmly, more concerned, "What is it Hiram? You have to understand, that I love her. I do. I've loved her since the day I held her in my arms."

The man didn't doubt her words. He wondered how it came so easy for her.

And maybe it was her openness and vulnerability that made him reciprocate the honesty, "Shelby, we, we never bonded with her like that. Don't give me wrong. We love her. It's just-" He ran a hand through his hair, "She's so different. So tactile and sensitive. Rachel demands so much, and we can't give it to her. It was easy when she was younger, but she's growing up and Leroy and I, we can't provide for her in those emotional ways, and especially not the supervision she needs through her teenage years."

Shelby bit her tongue. She wanted to scream at the man further, but she realized that he was opening up and letting his guard down. She had to be civil. "And your sister can provide that for Rachel?"

The man shook his head in frustration on the other line, "Carrie's a mother. She knows what she's doing. My sister loves Rachel and the girl could do with some of the tough love approach that she gives. It might toughen her up. "

Shelby took a deep breath, "That little girl I saw looked sad Hiram. "

The man felt tears in his eyes, "Look, I…I think I realized a while ago that Leroy and I, we…we fell in love with the idea of having a child. But actually having one is a whole other level. And we're running out of steam here. My sister is providing her the stability she needs. What we can't give her. But we do love her and we are not abandoning her. We plan on visiting at some point in the summer and we have a Skype call with her for tomorrow."

"You are treating her like a distant relative. That child is your daughter."

Hiram grew annoyed again, "God Shelby! What exactly do you want? Under law we are giving her exactly what she needs. I don't need you looking down on us atop your moral high horse."

Shelby steeled herself, "I want permission to see her."

"No." It was his automatic answer. He didn't even think twice, regardless of the nagging thoughts in his head.

"Your sister seems overwhelmed and tired. Rachel needs someone. She needs a mother. I just want to get to know her. I can be there for her. That's all I ask."

"You're not taking her from us!"

"That's not my intention. I already told you that. But look, my sister is also a lawyer, and after having talked to her some about the details, there is room to fight for at least visitation with her. I don't want to do that. I don't want to drag you and Leroy like that. But I can. And I know Rachel wants to get to know me. Your niece mentioned it to me as much."

That made the man pause. It was exactly what he worried about.

"I don't make these decisions on my own." He told her now, more coldly.

"Then talk to Leroy." Shelby matched his tone, "But I'm calling again tomorrow. And I hope you have an answer."

The woman ended the call and fell back onto her sofa. She was ready and willing to fight for her daughter. For her Rachel.

… … …

Leroy was looking at his partner incredulously. The man felt like he had just fallen into a bad dream.

"Hiram, you're fucking with me." He deadpanned.

Leroy watched as his partner shifted on his seat, "Why would this be a joke? Shelby called me and she wants us to allow her to see Rachel."

How? How could this have happened to them? After hearing how the conversation between Shelby and Hiram went down, all the hedge fund manager could do was sit down. All his energy suddenly felt drained. And it wasn't from a long day at work, but from the knowledge that their life was about to be invaded by the woman that Leroy grew to feel bitterness towards. A woman that their daughter could never get over.

He hung his head in his hands and felt Hiram put an arm around him. Leroy looked up, "Does she have grounds to fight this? If we say no, can she legally fight us?"

Hiram sighed, "She can argue emotional neglect, I suppose. And seeing that Rachel would love to get to know her and she's at an age where her opinion can hold up in court...well, yes. She can fight us. I'm not saying she'll win, but there is an argument in her favor."

Leroy stood up from where they were both sitting and paced the room in anger, "For fuck's sake! Rachel is not being emotionally neglected! God, I'm so tired of that coming from her, from your sister, and now from Shelby?" He said her name in disgust, "That woman is _nothing_ to us. She was a surrogate. That was it!"

Hiram watched Leroy and all his fury. He remembered how Rachel would shrink into her shell whenever he would scream and yell in front of her. If it was directed at her the girl would usually have tears running down her face by the time she was banished to her room. Leroy had a bad temper. Hiram knew how to deal with it. A thought crossed his mind. Was Rachel ever afraid of Leroy when he got like this?

Their life, their personalities...well it really didn't suit having a sensitive child like Rachel. Hiram was truly beginning to realize.

"Leroy." He said softly.

Leroy kept pacing the floor, "I can't believe this is happening! Out of all the places that she'd be why is that woman back in Ohio? She was living in New York when we worked with her! And now she's going to drag us in the dirt if we say no to her. I have a career, so do you! We can't let this happen!"

"LEROY!" Hiram yelled to get his partner's attention.

The man finally stopped pacing and turned to Hiram, "Why are you not as upset about this Hiram?" His arms flailed, "Do you not understand the gravity of the situation?!"

Hiram took a deep breath, "Can we think about what's best for Rachel for a moment?"

Leroy was taken aback. What was that supposed to mean?

He spoke rather defensively, "I _am_ thinking about what's best for Rachel. We can't introduce this woman to her life. It'll just disrupt everything."

"Disrupt?" Hiram sputtered, "For who? Disrupt our daughter or us?"

"Are you seriously asking me that question?"

"Yes!" Hiram stood up, "I am! Leroy, Rachel has been dying to meet her since we told her about the surrogacy."

"Since _you_ told her." Leroy corrected him, "I never wanted to tell her for that exact reason." It was obviously still a sore spot.

"Fine." He huffed, "Since _I_ told her. But that's neither here nor there. Rachel needs someone to give her what we never could. What clearly, based on what Shelby said, what Carrie can't. She needs a mom Leroy. Why are we so adamant against this? We have to be honest with ourselves here."

The sincerity in his voice calmed Leroy some. The taller man sat back down and breathed in a deep sigh.

"If we love Rachel, Leroy, we have to be honest with ourselves."

"I do love her."

"I know you do." Hiram told him with a kiss to his cheek, "We can't let our pride or our work get in the way. We have to think of Rachel. For once, we have to put her first."

Leroy looked at his partner. Was this really happening?

 **Hope you liked the first chapter! Please review :) If things seemed rushed it's because I just want to jump into Rachel and Shelby meeting once more in the next chapter. Let me know what you think!**


	2. A Brewing Storm

Shelby thumbed at the book in front of her nervously. Her daughter was set to call her for the first time. She wasn't sure what to expect. Rachel had been through so much already, and here Shelby was throwing another huge wrench in the little girl's life. But hopefully this was for the good. All the teacher wanted was for Rachel to be happy. If the girl seemed receptive then she would fight for their relationship. If Rachel wanted nothing to do with her, than she would honor that wish.

Her phone finally buzzed and Shelby froze for a moment. After the fourth ring Shelby quickly grabbed the phone and picked it up. One deep breath, "Hello?"

"Umm-Mrs. I mean, Miss Corcoran?"

"Hi Rachel." Shelby spoke kindly, "How, um, how are you?"

Oh God. Was she doing this right?

 _How the hell do you start a conversation with a daughter you only met for five minutes and who you missed ten years of her life? Was this the right decision?_

 _Shut up Shelby!_ She argued with herself.

The girl murmured out a 'Fine.' That focused Shelby once more. "Umm, how are you?" Rachel asked.

"I'm doing well." Shelby spoke, "Better now that I'm talking to you actually."

That made Rachel smile. It felt so sincere to the young girl. "I'm happy that I can talk to you too." She offered the woman.

Rachel had actually been over the moon when her fathers had explained everything to her. She begged them to let her go out with her mom and get to know her, but they only allowed phone calls for now. But as the girl ruminated about her situation she felt unease. This woman was a stranger to her, yet at the same time she wanted to get to know her so badly.

But Rachel did like the woman's voice, and wanted to keep hearing her talk. There was something comforting in her words. In her tone, It made her feel nice inside. That was the case three weeks ago when she had unexpectedly met her, and it was the case now.

"What did you do today?" Rachel asked the woman, trying to continue their conversation. She even added in what she did, "I went to school today and had music class. That's my favorite class, but we only have it once a week. My friend Quinn is in that class with me."

The girl wasn't sure if Shelby cared or not, but in her head it seemed like it mattered. But Shelby couldn't have been happier to hear Rachel speak about her day, albeit a small piece of it, but it was still beautiful to the woman.

"Music class sounds like a lot of fun. You know, I'm in charge of the Glee club in the high school."

Rachel's eyes widened, "Really?! The New Directions? You were at my school last year! I wanna be in your club so bad! I really, really do!" She squealed into the phone.

Her dream had been to be a part of McKinley's New Directions, ever since they came to her school last year to perform at one of their assemblies. She had fallen in love. Lindsay had called her a lame nerd for it though.

Shelby's heart fluttered. The girl was certainly excitable.

"This is so awesome!" She yelled in excitement once more, "Could you take me to one of your practices one day?! That would be super cool if you could!"

"Rachel!" Shelby heard someone say in the distance, "Quiet down!" The voice was much closer now, "Or you hang up that phone!"

The teacher on the other side frowned. It was Carrie's voice that was yelling. Her heart thudded when Rachel's voice changed significantly, back into a quiet and slightly embarrassed version.

"S-sorry aunt Carrie."

"You know your uncle has work in a few hours. He needs to sleep and not be woken up by your yells. What did I tell you just an hour ago when you were singing?"

"To-to be quiet." Rachel looked down at her feet and shuffled them.

"Look at me. Right now Rachel."

The girl did as she was told. Her face tinged red, well aware that Shelby was listening to everything.

"You are on your second warning. Don't let me get to the third."

"Okay, sorry." Rachel told her again, "I won't be loud again."

"Good, little lady. And I'm sure Ms. Corcoran doesn't need you yelling to the heavens either. Calm down and act like you have manners." She scolded.

Shelby heard a sharp close to a door and the girl on the other line sigh and sniffle, "Sorry for yelling Ms. Corcoran." Her voice watery came through the phone.

God, Shelby just wanted to give her a hug. Why did Carrie have to ride on the child like that? The woman was sure that after the first 'quiet down' she heard Carrie yell, that it would've been enough for Rachel. It wasn't necessary to embarrass her further.

"It's okay sweetie." Shelby assured her.

"Do-do you-um, are you mad that I yelled?" The girl wiped a tear that had made its way down and sniffled further, "I'm sorry."

"Hey now, don't apologize. You got excited, and its okay to be excited. I have no problem with it. And to answer your question from before, if your Aunt Carrie and dads are okay with it, then yes you can come to one of my practices. But if they're not then maybe you and me can just sing together one day."

Rachel wiped her eyes quickly as she thought of that prospect, "That sounds like lots of fun! Okay!"

Shelby could practically hear the smile on Rachel's voice. She chuckled through her words and spoke lightheartedly, "It would be an honor to get to spend time with you Rachel."

That caught Rachel unexpectedly. "Why?"

"Why what?" Shelby asked momentarily confused.

Why would someone want to spend time with her? Rachel thought.

Her parents sent her away. Her aunt Carrie was always in a bad mood, and it felt like it was always because of something she did, and her cousins usually grew annoyed by her quickly. The only person that appreciated her presence was her Uncle, but he worked a lot and was too tired most of the time to do anything. At school she was made fun of a lot, but one of the popular girls, Quinn, was starting to warm up to her. But she only talked to her during music class and that was it. Rachel considered her a friend, even though Quinn would probably deny it. Her two actual friends were outcasts along with her.

"Why do you wanna spend time with me?" Rachel asked so sincerely that it broke Shelby's heart. Her daughter felt unloved, and it killed her to realize that.

"I'm annoying, and a smartass, and I'm socially weird. That's what people tell me at least." There was shame in the little girl's voice. Shame in who she was. Another stab to the heart to Shelby, "And you hardly know me." Came the girl's voice again.

Shelby did all she could not to cry. How was she supposed to fix this? "Sweetheart, did your dads tell you a little bit about me?"

"Uh huh." The eleven year old started. She didn't understand why Shelby was asking that question now, but she answered anyway, "You were the surrogate that my dads used and you were the lady I met at my cousin's' high school."

"That's right." Shelby told her. The innocence in Rachel's tone pulling at the woman's heartstrings.

"And now you wanna get to know me." The girl twiddled with the hem of her shirt.

"Exactly. I've missed 10 years of your life. I've thought about you for 10 years and wished that I could get to spend time with you. So yes, if and when I'm finally able to spend time with you, it'll be an honor. You mean a lot to me Rachel Berry. And whoever has said those mean things about you are just confused and wrong."

Rachel was floored by the response. Her just turned 11 year old mind was struggling to process it. How could someone think so much of her? Nobody ever did. "Ms. Corcoran?"

"Yes, Rachel?"

The preteen's voice got significantly quieter and timid, "Do you-do you wanna be my mom? "

The only way a person could be blind to her faults, Rachel thought, was if that person was a parent. But, then again, her dads didn't even want her. So maybe Ms. Corcoran was just a really nice person like her uncle.

"I asked my dads and they just said you wanted to get to know me and to stop asking questions." The girl added.

Shelby felt her throat choke up. She pulled the phone away for a moment to compose herself, "Sweetheart, I would want nothing more than to be your mother. But it's up to you, if you want me to be."

Rachel's eyes immediately welled up. No one was ever this sweet to her, and now this woman who was actually her birth mother wanted to be a part of her life. It might've been far too quick by the standards of well adjusted 11 year olds to immediately want a stranger as their mother, but Rachel had a track record of getting attached to those who showed her affection. She clung to it for dear life because it was so rare for her.

"Do you-do you think my daddies will get mad Ms. Corcoran? If I ask them if you can be my mom?" The girl pouted, "They get mad at me all the time."

The girl thought that maybe after getting to know her, Shelby might think the same of her as all the other people in her life. A nuisance. But she'd take the love for now. It would soon end anyways.

"Let's take it one step at a time, honey." The woman herself couldn't answer that question, but she knew that she'd fight tooth and nail for Rachel Berry, "Things will fall into place. And Rachel, you can call me Shelby if that makes you feel more comfortable."

"R-really? I can call you Shelby?"

"Of course! You can call me whatever you want." There was a pause, "So long as its nice words."

Shelby was thinking about a particular word. Bitch, to be exact.

She had yelled it to her mother once at 16, after being denied the permission to go to a party. The consequences were not pretty.

'God! You are such a huge and unfair BITCH!"

Her mother tried to grab her, but Shelby pulled away, "NO! You're a bitch mom, do you hear me?!' She had reiterated, feeling momentarily victorious, "I'm going to my room!"

Shelby's mother had no idea what had gotten into her daughter. The girl was never as disrespectful as she had just been.

And unfortunately, the teenager didn't quite make it to her room. Her mother pulled Shelby back by her T shirt, and had her sweatpants down in seconds. She was pulled towards a chair, her bottom was bared, and was turned over her mother's knee.

"No! Stop it! No!" Shelby yelled as she felt the unforgivable bite of the wooden spoon, "It hurts! OW!"

Shelby swore it felt harder than usual too. To this day she had no idea how her mother got a hold of that damn spoon.

She was then promptly sent to bed with strict instructions not to come out until tomorrow morning. That punishment had definitely stuck to her, not only because of the semi public nature of her punishment (her sister and brother were there), but also because she had felt deep regret for calling her mother that. The guilt was probably the worst. The teenaged Shelby felt so bad that she had woken up early the next day, before her mother left for work at the hospital, and found her in the kitchen.

"M-mom?" Came Shelby's contrite voice.

The older Corcoran woman turned just in time to see Shelby by the refrigerator.

"Shellie, sweetheart?" The woman asked concerned.

It was 5 am on a Saturday morning. Neither of her children were ever up at this time. Shelby was also always pretty embarrassed after a spanking, and would never be the one to initiate conversation. It was usually after a talk, or some cuddles that the girl would feel okay again. And the mother knew that they were yet to have either of those. She also knew that she had spanked her daughter in front of her sister and brother and was expecting Shelby to be upset about that. A completely fair reaction, the woman knew this and wanted to apologize to her about that. Her daughter also looked like she hadn't slept, and her youngest always slept soundly after she or her husband warmed her bottom. For these reasons the mother was perplexed.

But her compassionate voice was enough to break the teenager, and so Shelby ran into her mother's arms,

"Mama-" She broke and cried into her mom's nurse's uniform, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to call you that!"

Shelby remembered her mother rocking them both and assuring her that all was forgiven, so long as she never spoke to her that way again, and Shelby never did.

No, she hoped to all the heavens that Rachel never uttered that word her way.

"Thank you…Shelby." Rachel finally answered.

… … …

It was a humid Thursday afternoon that Shelby was spending at McKinley High. She was finishing up reading over essays and inputting grades. There was a thunderstorm set to happen, and the woman wanted to finish before 8 pm when the rain was supposed to start pouring at its hardest. Already the clouds were moving in heavily. Their grayish color darkening the sky.

Shelby and Rachel had been having conversations on the phone and Skype three times a week now. They were coming up on two months since their first phone conversation. Leroy and Hiram, after much of Rachel's begging and pleading, allowed it. The girl would text them incessantly asking them if she could talk to Shelby more often. They didn't like phone calls, unless they called her, so Rachel stuck to texting them. She would also pester her aunt to persuade her fathers, and they finally agreed to allow Rachel to call Shelby more than just once a week.

Shelby and Rachel didn't know it, but the fathers were realizing that Shelby was going to become a bigger part of their life, whether they liked it or not. Their daughter could be stubborn as hell when she really wanted something. It was clear that she really wanted Shelby. Because of this realization they had started looking into shared custody proceedings. They wouldn't tell anyone about this though. They weren't even sure if they'd go through with it.

Meanwhile, Shelby hoped to be able to see Rachel in person soon. But don't give her wrong, simply hearing her daughter's voice was wonderful, as were the Skype sessions. Seeing Rachel's expressions through the screen as she talked excitedly about her day could instantly put the tired teacher into a bright mood.

Rachel would also sometimes ask Shelby multiple times if she was going to call her again. Shelby, without fail, assured the young girl that she would. The woman never missed one of their calls, yet Rachel was so sure that Shelby would pass her off soon enough for something more important.

It hurt the teacher's heart to watch as Rachel jumped up and down in her seat and yell 'You called Shelby!' or some variation of it when Rachel's face would pop up on the computer screen. The poor preteen had been looked over, abandoned, and pushed aside far too much for a child her age, and Shelby was determined to fix that.

 _I should've hugged her. Given her a kiss. I should've said something more comforting besides scolding her to use a tissue._ The woman thought as their only encounter about a month and a half ago came to mind.

The teacher kept a heavier eye out whenever she was out as well. Maybe they would bump into each other by chance again. They never did.

Shelby also knew that Lindsay was aware of the situation. She had talked to her student about it and the girl told her it was a little weird, but she'd get used to it. The woman had to try hard not to ask Lindsay about Rachel. It was a delicate relationship with Rachel already and she didn't want to ruin it by overstepping boundaries.

But currently the teacher was engrossed in her student's essays. It was 6 pm when Shelby got a text from Rachel. Her daughter had recently gotten into texting her too. Shelby wasn't sure if her dads had allowed her to do so, but she wouldn't question it.

' _ **Hi Shelby! What're you up to?'**_ It read.

Shelby smiled. That's usually how Rachel started a conversation through text.

"I'm grading papers at school right now. I've been putting it off, but it has to get done. How was your day, Rach?"

The woman expected a five text long message, per usual when she asked that question, but was surprised when no answer came. The woman thought nothing of it. Sometimes Rachel's aunt took her phone when she was using it at the table, or when she was supposed to be doing homework. Shelby simply put her phone near her just in case Rachel texted back and continued on with her grading.

… …. …

Rachel looked outside nervously. Her fingers twiddled at the window sill and she bit at her lip. The sky looked so dark. It was like every minute it looked more and more ominous out there. Her cousins were supposed to have been here with her, but they went out to pick up pizza hours ago and hadn't come back. Both her aunt and uncle were at work. So, Rachel was alone. And usually Rachel was used to that, but this time there was a little problem. Scratch that. A HUGE problem.

The eleven year old absolutely _hated_ thunderstorms.

She was terrified of them and often ended up in tears because of it. Last time there was a thunderstorm at night she ended up sleeping in Lindsay's bed, after much pleading and crying on her part. Say what you want about Lindsay, but she did still love her 'brat of a cousin' as she would say.

This was supposed to be a really big thunderstorm too. God, where were her cousins? She tried calling them but neither picked up. She decided to text Shelby to try and keep her mind off of it, but when the first crack of thunder came, the eleven year old jumped up from the windowsill and ran into the safety of her bed. She no longer had it in her to text her mother back.

 _Call her_

 _No, I can't!_ Rachel reasoned _She's busy. Don't be a nuisance. She'll hate you if you are._

The girl thought she could deal with it. There had been other thunderstorms when she lived in New York. But her dads were at least in the home. And they had let her sleep on the couch while they watched tv.

CRACK! The sky roared and Rachel just quivered further.

Hopefully, it wouldn't be too bad. Hopefully her cousins would get home soon. The girl hugged her Clifford tight to her chest.

 _Please, someone, get home soon._

… …. ….

The weatherman was wrong. The thunderstorm had really started in at around 7 pm. Shelby sighed as she looked at her workload. Just one more hour and she could finish it all up. The woman was midway through an essay when her phone rang. She looked and was surprised to see that Rachel was calling her. Her fathers were strict about when she could call and for how long they could talk. Thursday night at 7:23 pm was not one of those times. But, regardless, the woman picked up.

"Hello?"

"Sh-shelby!" Rachel gasped between her sobs.

The teacher instantly sat up, the essay in her hand quickly abandoned. Something was wrong. "Rachel, honey, what's going on?"

"I'm-I'm sorry! Shelby, I'm sorry!" Rachel begged through the phone.

More thunder cracked and Rachel's sob grew louder.

"Sweetheart, why are you sorry?" Shelby's heartbeat was racing. Her body felt tight, ready to fly off to help Rachel, "Why are you sorry?" She repeated again.

"I'm sorry for calling!" The girl cried.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm glad you called." Shelby comforted, "But you need to tell me what's wrong Rachel."

"S-scared Shelby. I'm s-scared of thunder!"

Another enormous crack, that made even Shelby jump, emitted a louder sob from Rachel. The storm was not letting up.

Shelby felt much better knowing that Rachel wasn't in immediate danger, but hearing her heart wrenching sobs was not exactly pleasant for her either.

"Oh sweetie." She soothed, "Is someone home with you?"

"No!" Rachel's voice was desperate, "Please come Shelby. I don't wanna be alone." The eleven year old started to cry even harder and Shelby thought she'd make herself sick soon enough. The teacher could hear her breathing quicken.

"Rachel, breathe for me, please." The woman spoke softly, "Take a deep breath."

"I want you here Shelby please! Please! My cousins aren't here and my aunt and uncle are working!"

Shelby bit her lip but knew she couldn't leave the preteen, on the verge of a panic attack, alone.

"PLEASE!" Rachel basically yelled her plea through the phone.

Without another thought, Shelby sprang up and quickly walked to her car. All thoughts of work completely forgotten.

"Where do you live Rach?" It had occurred to her that she wasn't even aware of where her daughter lived. Those Berry men really had their relationship on a short leash.

And maybe if Rachel wasn't crying into the phone she wouldn't have gone. Maybe she would've calmed her down just by talking to her, or at least called Carrie since she had her number as well. But all the protocol, and niceties went out the window when she heard her daughter grow increasingly more panicked. Shelby needed to be there for her daughter.

"68370 Hillendale Road." Rachel hiccuped through her cries.

"I'm on my way, sweetheart." Shelby assured, turning on her car, "Just keep on talking to me, okay? I'll be there soon."

The drive wasn't long, and ten minutes later Shelby was in front of Rachel's house. She had hung up, explaining to Rachel that she was right outside. The woman went inside without knocking because the door was unlocked. Rachel had told her that her cousins probably left it as such.

"Rachel?" Shelby asked. She shook herself off near the door and closed her umbrella. She then took off her rain jacket and hung it on the coat rack that was near her.

It hadn't hit Shelby yet that this was the first time seeing her since she discovered that Rachel was her daughter. All she cared about was making sure that the young child felt safe again.

"Rachel, I'm here!" Shelby said a little louder. Another loud crack came and Shelby heard a yelp and subsequent whimpers. The woman followed the sound and realized it was in the small walk in pantry of the kitchen.

She opened the door and inside was a small curled up and shaking Rachel. She knelt down in her skirt and heels, "Rachel?"

The girl lifted her face and saw Shelby. Relief and emotion flooded the girl, and she began to cry once more.

"Honey, come here." Shelby beckoned her with her hand, "Come here, Rach. I'm here." She spoke in such a maternal manner that Rachel couldn't deny her. She crawled out from under the space.

The moment Shelby opened her arms Rachel launched herself into them, clinging to her neck for dear life.

Shelby had to grab onto the pantry door so she wouldn't fall over. She hadn't expected that, but she quickly recovered.

"Thank you." Rachel cried, "Thank you so much!"

Shelby stood up, the eleven year old attached to her neck like a scared toddler. Her legs wrapped around the woman. Shelby rubbed the tiny girl's back. When two loud cracks came Shelby felt Rachel's body tense and her breathing quicken once more.

"No!" Rachel whimpered, "No thunder. I hate thunder! Make it stop Shelby." She squeaked desperately, Make it stop!"

"Shhh. Rach. It won't hurt you. You're safe." Shelby soothed, "Breathe slowly honey. Slowly."

The woman carried Rachel into the living room. She was going to have her sit on the sofa, but the young girl in her arms refused.

"No! NO!" Rachel cried and hugged her tighter, pulling at the fabric of Shelby's blazer, hooking her legs together around Shelby's waist.

Rachel finally felt safe, and this was Shelby, her mother. She never wanted to let go. The woman would surely leave her after this anyway, so she might as well fight for all the loving up she could get.

"Okay Rach. I'll keep on holding you." Shelby cooed and sat down with Rachel, "I'm gonna set you on my lap, though. Is that alright?"

The girl mumbled out an "Uh huh," giving her hold on the woman some slack, and so Shelby maneuvered her to have her cradled in her lap.

"Sweetheart, match my breaths. I need you to calm down." Shelby took a deep breath and Rachel followed her. Soon enough, the girl was at a calmer state. The thunder was still going, but she wasn't as frightened now that Shelby was there, and she had the chance to curl up in her mother's chest. She would still jump and whimper when the thunder cracked particularly loudly, but she was no longer panicking. Shelby constantly swaying her, and patting her back kept Rachel relaxed.

And the teacher wasn't exactly new to caring for children. She had nieces and nephews, but this was different. This was her daughter. It was in the midst of calming her child down that Shelby realized how momentous this was. She had finally seen her daughter in person, like she had wished since their first coincidental encounter. She was now holding said child in her arms and comforting her. This had never happened before. How many times would she have done this if she had kept Rachel?

The woman teared up at these thoughts as she rocked Rachel, cradled close to her, to calm her down.

It was twenty minutes later when Rachel peeked her head from Shelby's embrace. Her eyes were puffy and red. Her cheeks flushed and tear stained, and she was taking the occasional hitched breath, but all Shelby saw was a beautiful sight. Her baby girl.

"Hey you." Shelby spoke with a soft smile, looking down at her, "Welcome back."

Rachel blushed. They had gotten to know each other pretty well through their multiple calls, but they had never been this close before. And Rachel had made a fool of herself, crying so much and so hard.

 _Insufferable is what you are!_ Leroy's voice rang in her mind.

Rachel squirmed in Shelby's lap, "I'm sorry." She spoke contritely, "Would you like me to get off of you?"

"Well, do _you_ want to get off?" Shelby asked trying to sound as lighthearted as she could, despite how much sympathy she felt for the small girl in her arms.

Rachel shook her head shyly, giving her mother the deepest pouty eyes.

"Well then, l guess you're staying. I'm happy to have you in my arms lovebug."

This made the girl giggle. Shelby had made a habit of calling her the sweet nickname on occasion, and Rachel loved it.

"I'm sorry for making you waste your time to come here." She told her, a look of shame coming over her. She hid herself into the woman's arms, not wanting to see Shelby's reaction.

"Whoah." Shelby pulled away from the girl to give her a good, stern look, "You, Rachel Berry, are not a waste of my time."

"But you were busy." Rachel reasoned, "I'm not supposed to-"

Shelby cut her off, "But you needed my help, and you are more important."

The girl's lip quivered. She shook her head in confusion.

"Yes Rachel." Shelby told her softly, "I care about you that much, and I hope that one day you'll believe me."

The girl just nodded and leaned back into Shelby, relishing the warmth, and not wanting to confront the confusion in her head.

Shelby took her little girl in for a moment. She was wearing cotton sleeping shorts covered in stars, and a rather large McKinley High t shirt that she assumed was Ron or Lindsay's. Her tiny feet were bare and her hair was out and her hair was still slightly damp from the shower Rachel had taken a few hours before .

"Where are your cousins Rach?" The woman asked.

Rachel shrugged and clung to Shelby tighter at the sound of another loud crack, though the storm was dying down now.

Shelby rubbed her back, "I'm here. You're okay." She assured the little girl once more for good measure.

"They were supposed to pick up pizza, but they've been gone for four hours. I think they went with their friends." Rachel mumbled.

Shelby frowned. The teenagers were obviously careless. How could they leave an 11 year old by herself for so long? Most importantly, how could they do that to her daughter?

"I'm sorry they did that." Shelby soothed her.

Rachel shrugged, "S'okay. They do it all the time, and come back before my aunt or uncle get home."

Shelby bit her lip. Oh boy, if only she could give them a piece of her mind without ruining ties with Rachel. She wished Rachel was hers so she could lash out at this family. She didn't care if the parents were overwhelmed and overworked. She didn't care. Her daughter was being completely overlooked and no one seemed to bat an eye.

Rachel was starving for love and affection. It was clear to Shelby in the way the young girl sought her attention in the various texts she sent. She saw it in the way that the eleven year old practically begged her not to hang up the phone every time they talked, and the way she clung to her so easily now, even though they had barely seen each other in person.

And, as if on cue, two laughing teenagers made their way into the home. "Rach! Food!" Lindsay called.

But their carefree demeanor quickly fell when they saw that Shelby was sat on the sofa with their baby cousin Rachel on her lap, hidden in her arms like a little girl.

"Oh. Shit." Ron immediately said running a hand through his hair and nervously shifting the pizza box in his hand.

Lindsay caught her bearings first, "Ms. Corcoran, you're, what're you doing here? You aren't supposed to be here, remember?"

The teen hoped that mild threat would have some effect on the teacher. No such luck. Shelby seemed even more intimidating on her couch, than in the classroom.

Shelby wasn't having it. The woman bobbed her knee up and down, and rubbed Rachel's back, letting the girl in her arms know that she could remain there.

"Lindsay, Rachel called me hysterical to come over. She was left home alone and she panics during thunderstorms. I wasn't going to let her get through a panic attack on her own."

The woman's eyebrow raised at the two, and Lindsay looked down at her crossed arms, "Oh."

Rachel, who was hiding in Shelby's chest, squirmed a bit to move off her mother. When Shelby saw that Rachel was trying to get off, she helped her and slid her off her lap.

The girl stood up and faced her cousins. "I was scared!" She waved her arms in the air, "Where were you guys?"

Lindsay scoffed, "We told you we were getting pizza, remember?"

Ron showed the meal to Rachel, as if that was supposed to make everything better.

"Four hours ago!" Rachel yelled, "I hate storms! You know that."

"We forgot." Ron jumped in, setting the pizza box on the center table, "Our bad Rach. We went to see friends for a bit before."

Lindsay turned to her English teacher, "Ms. Corcoran, no offense but my mom gets here in like thirty minutes, and if she sees you here, it's gonna be world war three. My uncles don't want you around her yet anyway."

"I asked her to be here!" Rachel argued, "It's not Shelby's fault. You guys weren't here and I was scared and-"

"Oh my God, you're such a scaredy cat!" Lindsay groaned.

"AM NOT!" Rachel yelled with a stamp of her foot.

Lindsay scoffed, "Are too, shorty! You fucking called Ms. Corcoran! Do you realize how much shit we're in now?"

Ron elbowed her, "Shut up Linds!" He hissed.

Lindsay shoved him, "Don't tell me what to do!"

"I'm older than you!"

"And stupider than me." Lindsay shot back.

Shelby took the moment to stand up and cross her arms across her chest, "EX-CUSE ME." She commanded the room.

Crap. Now she was doubly as intimidating to Lindsay.

"Lindsay, while I appreciate your concern, your mother, father, and I will be having a conversation, because what happened tonight is not okay."

Lindsay saw Rachel smirk from behind Shelby and she gave her a glare that threw daggers.

"So you mean we're gonna get in trouble for her being a scaredy cat?" The girl asked pointing to herself and Ron, "God, this is just fucking perfect!"

"Hey!" Shelby said sharply, "You need to calm down Lindsay. Both of you-" She gave Ron a glance, "were irresponsible and left your 11 year old cousin, who is terrified of thunder alone DURING a thunderstorm. That is not okay, and your parents need to know about this."

"I hope you're happy now Rachel." Ron groaned.

"You're dads are gonna be so pissed." Lindsay added.

Rachel frowned and furrowed her eyebrow, "N-no they're not!"

"Uh, yes they are." Lindsay deadpanned.

Shelby turned to look at her daughter. Her young face was filled with a mixture of anger and sadness, "Well…" She clenched her fists, "Well I don't care! I don't care! I DON'T CARE!" The little girl ran up the stairs, knowing that she was going to start crying again.

Shelby turned her stare at the two adolescents. She wanted blood. "Sit down. Right. Now." She commanded pointing to the sofa. Being a high school teacher, the woman knew how to deal with teenagers. She had no qualms about it.

The two heard the strict tone in Shelby's voice and did as they were told. If they didn't know any better they'd think that was her spanking voice. Every parent had one. Well, at least every parent that used that type of discipline, they thought.

"What the hell is your problem?" The woman hissed. She took a step towards them, "Do you not realize how terrified she was? Why are you blaming her for something that is your fault?"

Ron shrugged, "We didn't- we didn't know she was scared of thunder."

Yes they did. Well Lindsay had known, she had just forgotten.

"I am not your mother." Shelby scolded, "And you better thank God that I am not."

Her own father had busted her older brother's butt for having snuck out when he was supposed to have been taking care of a 9 year old Shelby once. He certainly never did that again. Mr. Corcoran's lap was not one you wanted to be over, especially when your offense was hurting his princess, or putting her in danger. He had a soft spot for his youngest child, and hardly ever spanked her. It hurt him so much to do so. Instead, Shelby's mother almost always had to end up being the bad cop.

"But let me tell you this," Shelby's anger rose, "If the conversations I've had with Rachel are anything to go off of, then that girl cares deeply for the both of you. You two constantly ignoring her, belittling her, and making fun of her is not right. She is a child for fuck's sake!" She bent to their level and got unbearably close to them, "Treat. Her. Right." A well manicured finger pointed at the teenagers.

Both of them winced. The woman stood up to her full height and didn't get a chance to get anything else out before Carrie strode into the front door.

"What in God's name is going on?!" The woman said, clearly tired from work, and not excited to deal with more drama. Why on God's green earth was Shelby Corcoran in her home? And why did her children look so chastised?

"Ms. Corcoran, what are you doing here? Do you realize you are breaking the contract? You are not supposed to be here!" Her eyes searched for her niece. Where was Rachel? A million thoughts crossed the woman's mind.

And in that moment Shelby could not care any less for the piece of paper that had left her daughter suffering for so long. "With all due respect Mrs. Thompson, I don't care about that stupid contract!"

"Excuse me?" Carrie stood up a little taller, "Ron, Lindsay." The woman snapped, "Upstairs and in your room." She did not want her children to be a part of this.

Too bad, they were already highly involved.

"No. They stay here." Shelby demanded.

"You are not their mother." Carrie said coldly and pointed toward herself, "I am!"

Shelby didn't let that deter her. She was a mother bear, aimed and ready to pounce for her wounded cub.

"The _reason_ I'm here-" Shelby started with a bit of a snarl, "Is because Rachel called me in full panic mode, crying. She is deathly afraid of thunderstorms, and nobody was home." She gave Ron and Lindsay a pointed stare, "She was begging me to come. And I was not going to allow that scared little girl to suffer alone."

Lindsay bit her lip. Shit. Shit. She was in so much trouble. The girl looked down at her phone, sure that her mother was piercing through them right now.

And Carrie was definitely staring harshly at them. Her children had to mess up and go ahead and bring this woman into their home.

"Where the hell were you two?" She hissed angrily at her children, "You have no idea what you're in for if I found out that your answer is a lie. So think very hard about what you are going to tell me."

Ron shuffled his feet, "Ma, we, we went to get pizza, but stopped at Michael's before and we lost track of time. We were only supposed to be gone like an hour at most. Honest!"

Carrie held the bridge of her nose, "Were you not listening when I told you that your cousin can't be home alone during thunderstorms?!" Her voice boomed.

Ron shook his head tentatively, "I-I guess not." He mumbled.

Carrie turned to Lindsay. Her most stubborn child, "And what do you have to say for yourself?"

The girl just shrugged. She did not want to say something that would put her in any more trouble. She'd stick to silence.

"Lindsay Marie." The mother said through her teeth, embarrassed and frustrated by her teenage daughter's defiance.

"What?" The teenager snapped, "I don't have anything to say! I second everything Ron said, that's it."

The mother breathed in deeply, "Both of you, go to your rooms. Your father and I will deal with you both later."

"But ma-" Ron tried.

"NOW!" The woman barked, "I don't have any patience for you two right now. Get your asses upstairs!"

Both of them, thoroughly chastised, did as they were told.

"Lindsay, send Rachel downstairs." Carrie added, her arms crossed, as they passed her and avoided her steely gaze.

"I have to call Hiram and Leroy." Carrie told Shelby, still fumed, "This is getting out of hand."

But Shelby didn't understand what Carried was talking about, "Mrs. Thompson Rachel was frightened, you can't possibly blame her-"

"No, you don't understand." Carrie shook her head in frustration, "All that girl talks about now, it seems, is you. She could've called me or her uncle, but she called you. This arrangement with us taking care of her isn't going to work if she doesn't see us as her caretakers. Understand?"

"What? But it's only happened once. I can talk to her and explain that you and her uncle are in charge." Shelby tried. The teacher felt like she was losing footing. What was going to happen now?

"It's happened more than once!" The woman snapped, "It happens all the time now! Like the time she waited to call you and ask you about menstruation. I overheard her telling you how one of the girls in her school got her period. Before, she would incessantly ask me those types of questions. She talks to you about her day. She never does that with us. She tells you all the jokes she thinks are funny. I've heard her!" Carrie controlled herself as she felt herself getting emotional.

Shelby looked at the woman, and saw the frustration and tiredness up close for the first time.

"You could get her to tell you those things. It's just about the way you approach her." The teacher weakly tried to offer advice.

Carrie shook her head, "I am not that type of mother. I do not have the time or the patience to deal with the type of child Rachel is. My children, they are so different from her. My husband he works so much, and although he's the only one that gives her what she needs, he's hardly here to do so. I've realized since a while that I just can't, I can't raise her. Not in a way that'll help her at least."

They both heard footsteps coming down the stairs. Shelby was the first one to turn around. Her daughter was coming down.

Carrie composed herself and stood up, "Rachel, come sit here please."

The small girl nodded and took a seat where her aunt was pointing. She sat next to her mother, and was grateful for that, though she didn't look at her mother. God knows what talk the two woman had. Maybe her mother didn't like her as much anymore and she told her aunt Carrie that she didn't want to deal with such a crybaby of a daughter.

Carrie crossed her arms and gave her niece a stern look, "We are going to call your fathers, and you are going to tell them what you did tonight, understood?"

A quiet nod came from the eleven year old. Shelby looked at her daughter and wanted nothing more than to bring her in for a hug. She moved her hand and squeezed it, offering the girl a small show of comfort.

Rachel looked up at Shelby with pained brown eyes.

"It'll be okay." Shelby whispered.

Rachel looked away.

 _Yeah, you're leaving. It'll be okay for you_. The girl thought. Why was she stupid enough to have begged her mom to come? In her frightened state she hadn't realized what she was doing. Why did she always have to turn into some little baby every time she got emotional?

Rachel watched her aunt dial her dad's number. Oh no, they were going to be so mad.

"Hello, Carrie?" Came Leroy's voice from the speakerphone.

Rachel winced. She had hoped that it would've been Hiram and not Leroy. Shelby saw the discomfort, her daughter showed, at Leroy's name. Hiram had always been the more understanding one.

"Leroy, Hi. Rachel has something to tell you." The woman said peering at her niece.

She handed Rachel the phone. The preteen looked at her aunt and shook her head. She didn't want to do this!

"No aunt Carrie." Rachel whispered.

"Rachel, talk to your father!" She chastised.

"I don't wanna!" The eleven year old whined.

"Rachel Berry! I can hear everything. Now what is the problem?" The father interjected.

Shelby stayed quiet. She wasn't sure if she should announce herself as well. But Carrie had not mentioned it, so she decided to wait and see how things played.

Rachel crossed and uncrossed her feet, wanting to be swallowed by the carpet. All eyes were on her. Even her mother's, but those eyes were a little softer and more concerned.

"Rachel, it is late and I am tired. I have an early morning tomorrow, now talk so I can go to bed." The man snapped.

Shelby felt her chest tighten. Her anger towards Leroy growing by the minute.

"Dad, I-I got scared today 'cause of the storm and 'cause I was alone, so I, um, I called Shelby and told her to come."

"WHAT?" He growled.

"I, I wanted her to come d-daddy." She barely eeked out.

" And she came?" His ask was ominous and it sent a chill down Rachel's spine.

"umm, yes sir." Rachel all but whispered.

Shelby looked to Carrie. The older woman motioned Shelby to be quiet. The teacher was perplexed but obliged.

"Rachel." The man groaned. There was a five second silence, and the preteen braced herself for what was coming. Her father was going to blow his lid.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" The man yelled, "That was a stupid thing to do, young lady! We gave you specific details as to how to contact Ms. Corcoran, and let you know that you were not to see her until we allowed you to! Why do you make our lives so difficult Rachel?!"

The young girl couldn't help the tears that flowed down her cheeks, "I'm sorry! I was scared!"

"No. You need to grow up! You are 11 now, a little thunder should not have you crying like a toddler. You cannot just bother people like that. Do you understand me?! Just grow up Rachel!"

Shelby was just about to speak up and put Leroy in his place when Rachel lost it, "Why are you even mad?!" She yelled through the phone, "You don't care! You're not even here! Ms. Corcoran only came to help me, that's all she was doing!" Her tears made her voice crack, but the girl didn't care, "I called her because she's the only one that cares! I don't care if you're mad. You're always mad at me. Everyone is always mad at me!"

Carrie took the phone from Rachel, stood her up, and popped the girl on the bottom twice. It took Rachel by surprise. She had been swatted two separate times already, both by her aunt, but every time it happened, she didn't expect it.

Shelby hadn't expected that either. She felt it was out of left field, and considering all that they put her daughter through completely unfair. But, there were countless times that her own parents had to swat her to get her to stop screaming and yelling.

"You go upstairs and lay down." Carrie's tone was not to be messed with.

Without even a second glance to Shelby the girl ran up the stairs.

Leroy had heard it all and sighed heavily. "I don't understand her." Came his voice.

Once again, Carrie silently eyed Shelby, a sign to still keep quiet.

"What the hell are we going to do Carrie? She loves that woman."

"She does." Carrie responded.

"Did Shelby calm her?" He asked.

"When I got here, she wasn't panicking any longer. My kids were supposed to be here, but they were being boneheads and left the house for a long time."

"It's not their fault."

 _Yes, it is_ , Shelby thought. _It's everyone's fault. We're all at fault._

Leroy continued, "She shouldn't expect people to coddle her. I hate that she is so sensitive."

 _You bastard._ Yelled Shelby's mind.

Carried sighed, "Leroy, have you talked to Hiram about Rachel's relationship with Shelby? How're you two going to move forward?"

There was a pause. Shelby understood the reason she was told to be quiet. Carrie wanted her to be able to listen to all that Leroy had to say. He would've been defensive if he knew Shelby were there.

"She's been good to her, hasn't she?" Leroy's voice was quieter. More resigned.

It took Shelby for a loop.

"She certainly has." Carrie answered.

"You know," Leroy said, "We've been calling Rachel more often, but now all she talks about is Shelby this, when I was talking with Shelby that, and I can't help but feel upset when she does it. She's asked us if she could be her mother for God's sake!"

Shelby rolled her eyes. _Cry me a fucking river._

"Hiram should've talked to her, not me." His voice rose in frustration, "I always yell. He's calmer."

"You did go a little overboard, but she has a temper just like yours." Carrie said a little more lightly.

"Great. Learned by example I guess." The man mumbled unhappily.

 _It's genetics too. I had a horrible temper at that age._

"Leroy, so what, what's going to happen?"

The man on the other end took a long swig of the whiskey he had poured himself, "Carrie, Hiram and I, we, we thought it would've been slower, you know? We didn't think that in two months we'd have to make a decision like this. I didn't realize, well, I didn't want to admit to myself that-that Rachel needed her mother this bad."

"That woman Leroy-" Carrie said moving to stare at Shelby unmovingly, "I hear them talk. I saw her today. She knows how to be a mother to her. She knows how to care for her in ways that we clearly haven't provided."

Shelby couldn't help the blush rise in her cheeks. So that's what Carrie really thought of her.

"I love her Carrie." There was a sincerity in his voice that not even an angry Shelby could deny, "I love my daughter."

"I know you do." Carrie assured him.

"Do you think she knows it?" Leroy asked, "Do you think Rachel knows?"

The woman couldn't answer to his liking, "I know she loves you."

"R-right." His voice was watery, and it was obvious he had choked up, "I'll talk to Hiram about everything. I'll call you and see how we'll work through it."

A strangled 'goodnight' came and Leroy ended the call before the woman could say anything else.

By now both Shelby and Carrie were seated on the sofa. Carrie looked at the teacher after staring at her phone for a while, "You can go ahead and judge us from your high horse Ms. Corcoran," The woman started abruptly, "You might think we're cold and mean. But, listen to me, we do love that girl." Her voice became quieter, "And I want to do right by her, and I, I know you're it."

Shelby offered the woman a small nod, "You're right. I do judge you when I see how much pain Rachel is in. I can't help that. But it means the world to know that you believe that I could do right by Rachel. Thank you for letting me stay and hear the conversation."

Carrie cleared her throat, "Right, well, it's late. My husband won't get here until 3 in the morning. So waiting for him to talk would be rather painful for the both of us, don't you think?"

Shelby chuckled with an added eye roll, "Do you mind me checking in on Rachel? I just want to say goodbye."

The woman ran a hand through her tired face, "Be my guest. First door on the right once you're upstairs."

Shelby thanked her and went up. She knocked twice.

"Yeah, come in mom." Came Lindsay's voice.

Shelby froze. Her reaction to Lindsay and Ron came flooding back to the forefront of her mind. Lindsay was her student. Shit. How was she going to navigate this?

The woman slowly opened the door. She took in the room for a moment. The walls were white, but filled with posters, pictures, and random drawings. There was a blue, pink, and red colored tapestry that hung from the ceiling, and a bookcase with trophies atop. Most, if not all of the contents in the room were Lindsay's. Her eyes scanned the beds. Rachel's bed was undid, but Shelby could see that it had a yellow and white comforter and sheet set. There was also a Clifford dog atop. Lindsay's bed was gray and white, and there was a desk closest to hers.

Lindsay turned when no sound came from whom she thought was her mother. Her expression turned into surprise when she saw her English teacher standing at the door of her room. The same English teacher that had just scolded her like as if she was her mother.

"Oh." Lindsay said. She was only wearing her pajamas. It was weird that Shelby was seeing her like this.

"Sorry Lindsay, I'm just looking for Rachel." Shelby offered the girl a small smile.

"She's in there" Lindsay pointed at the bathroom door, "She'll be out in a few. She's showering."

The woman thought that Rachel had just showered, so she was confused.

"Shorty sometimes showers when she wants to cry and stuff without anyone bothering her. The mother felt her heart hurt for her daughter.

"I see." Shelby answered, "Do you mind if I sit here?" She pointed to the desk chair. The teenager shrugged, "Yeah, sure. I don't care."

The teacher stayed quiet for a few moments, but knew that she needed to talk to her student.

"Lindsay, I want to apologize about today."

The girl looked up from her laptop and stared at her teacher, "It's fine. Whatever."

"No, it's not whatever." Shelby told her, "I am your teacher, but now all of a sudden I'm becoming someone very important to your cousin's life. I have a feeling you and I are going to be seeing each other out of school a lot more. And we might have to grow accustomed to a new dynamic. But today, I took it to another level far too quickly. I understand if you're embarrassed, upset, or angry about it."

"It is weird to get yelled at by your English teacher while you're sitting on your sofa at home."

Shelby chuckled a bit, "Well, I was upset. I understand that you and Ron go out and do this all the time. I just expected a little more responsibility."

"Yeah." Lindsay muttered, "Don't worry, my ma is gonna rip us a new one anyways because of it. We got caught. We're screwed. Probably grounded forever." A small smile dawned on her lips, "It'll probably happen again, but at least not for a long while."

"Could you be a little nicer to her too?"

Lindsay eyed her, "She just doesn't have thick skin."

The teacher narrowed her eyes, "Well I would hope that you could accommodate her 'thin skinned' self a little bitter. She is your blood after all, Lindsay."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll try."

Shelby heard the water turn off.

"Looks like shorty's out." Lindsay added, "Want me to leave?"

The woman shook her head, "I just wanted to say goodnight to her. You don't need to leave."

Lindsay shook her head, "Nah, Rach seemed pretty upset. I think she needs you." She hopped off her bed, "I'll be in my brother's room."

Shelby smirked, _So she does care._

The door opened and out came Rachel. Her hair was still dry so Shelby assumed she had a water cap on in the shower, or her hair up in a bun. But the girl's eyes were still very red, and she was wearing the same clothing she had on before.

When Rachel saw Shelby she jumped, "Sh-shelby, you're here."

Shelby smiled and nodded, "I came up to say bye and goodnight."

Rachel's demeanor fell drastically, "You-you're leaving me. You're not-not calling anymore either?"

The woman stood up, "What? No, Rach." She grabbed her daughter's hand and led them both to the girl's bed. "Bye for the night I mean. Of course I'll still call you, and spend time with you if we can."

Shelby looked down at her daughter. She really was a little thing for her age. "Can I tuck you in?"

Rachel nodded, a glimmer of pure joy in her eyes.

"Only my uncle's ever tucked me in." She told Shelby, "Three times. He's done it three times."

Shelby tried not to show her emotions. Every time Rachel mentioned something like that she wanted to cry. Unlike her daughter, Shelby was tucked in practically every night until the end of high school.

The woman noticed the Clifford stuffed animal on the bed, she picked it up, then opened up the covers for Rachel, "Hop in, lovebug."

The girl did so happily and felt the covers come up.

"Do you sleep with him?" Shelby asked of the dog, lifting him up.

Rachel blushed a bit. "Mhm."

The mother smiled, "Alright, here you go then."

Rachel took her stuffed animal and squeezed it tightly to her. Shelby sat by her and stroked her hair. The girl closed her eyes and smiled. Shelby was her dream mother come true.

"Rach?" Shelby spoke softly.

"Yeah?" The girl asked, being lulled by her mother's strokes.

"Why did you think I didn't want to keep talking to you?" Her thumb kept caressing the girl's hairline.

The small girl opened her eyes again, "Because I was a bother, and I cried a lot, and then I was bad and yelled at my dad."

"Hmm." Shelby tapped her own chin pensively, "Well, you know what I think?"

The girl shook her head, and looked at her mother with rapt attention. A childlike gaze that melted Shelby's heart.

"I think that you were most definitely not a bother. Spending time with you today will go down as one of the best days I've had. And yes, you did cry, but only because you were scared or upset. That's a normal reaction. I cry whenever my favorite American Idol contestant leaves stage."

This made Rachel chuckle. Shelby smiled and bopped her nose, "See, I'm a cryer too! It's okay to cry. And lastly," The woman turned a little bit more serious, "I don't think you were bad today. Your dad was yelling at you, and you had a lot of pent up emotions. That happens sometimes."

Rachel's gaze fell to her Clifford. She cuddled him and let his fur tickle her chin, "Dad's so mad at me."

Shelby rubbed Rachel's arm, "I'm sorry sweetheart."

"He gets angry all the time. I'm used to it. But when he yells it's still scary, and I hate not knowing if he's still mad or not afterwards."

Shelby looked at her sadly, "All I can say is that I think he overreacted, but don't tell him I said that, and that you didn't deserve that."

"I-I didn't?"

The woman couldn't help that her eyes watered. Her daughter had come to believe that she deserved all the tongue lashings she was on the receiving end of.

"No, no you did not. I promise you."

"Okay." Was all Rachel said, even though she didn't quite believe Shelby.

The mother knew that she didn't believe it either. But it was late and the eleven year old's eyes were droopy. She needed to go to sleep, "Now, little lady, I think it's past someone's bedtime."

The girl pouted but obliged. Her cousins didn't have a bedtime, yet she did. It wasn't fair!

But, her mother was being so sweet, so she snuggled further into her sheets. Shelby kissed her daughter's forehead and smiled at her when she pulled away. Shelby didn't want to leave. When would be the next time she'd get to hold her daughter again? But, she had to be strong.

"Shelby?"

"Hmm?"

"Can you, can you stay, until I fall asleep?" Her eyes begged, "Only if you want to!" She quickly added.

Shelby wasn't sure if Carrie would mind, or if the Berry fathers would mind. But she didn't particularly care. "Of course! You're my favorite girl, remember?" Shelby had begun telling Rachel that, among the many other affectionate terms. "Can you scoot over for me?"

The girl eagerly did so, while Shelby took off her heels.

"Am I really your favorite girl? Even though you teach and meet a lot of teenage girls that are cooler than me?"

Shelby slid in and put an arm around Rachel. She could already tell that Rachel was a difficult one to get to sleep.

"Yup." The teacher responded and playfully ticked Rachel's side making her giggle, "And there is no girl cooler than you. You're for sure the coolest one."

Rachel snuggled into her mother. "You're silly."

"I'm just being honest."

Rachel didn't responded she just wrapped an arm around the woman's waist.

The bed was awfully small for two people, but they made do. Soon enough Rachel had melted into her mother's side.

Shelby kissed the top of her daughter's head, smelling her shampoo. She could see that the eleven year old was fighting off her tiredness. Her eyes were opening and closing. What she didn't know was that Rachel was trying hard to soak in her love. The faster she fell asleep, the less time she'd get to spend aware of her mother's presence.

"It's sleep time, Rach." Shelby cooed.

"I can't believe you're here." The girl murmured. Her voice partially obstructed by Shelby's blazer.

"I'm here for you. I always will be." Shelby assured her, and saw the smile that formed on her daughter's face.

"Close your eyes sweetheart." The woman whispered. Then, recalling how her mother would lull her to sleep, she slid a hand under the back of Rachel's shirt and let her fingernails gently graze her daughter's back in an even motion.

It worked.

"I love you." Rachel murmured.

And that made Shelby's heart burst. It was the first time Rachel had said it. The woman was positive this was what heaven felt like.

"I love you too Rachel." Shelby replied.

 **Hope you enjoyed! Please let me know what you think and review :D. Also people ask me Qs and catch sneak peeks on my tumblr. The name there is "writingsteph"**


	3. They're Happy Tears

Rachel looked down at her mary janes. She didn't know how to feel. Well, she felt happy. But, at the same time, she was sad, angry, scared? Her mind was on overdrive, and the eleven year old wasn't sure what to do about it.

"Rach?"

It was Shelby's voice coming through. Her mother.

Shelby was looking at her softly. Taking in the sight of her little daughter. She was wearing a black pleated skirt and a collared light blue shirt that matched with the headband in her hair. Lately, all Shelby could think about was how truly adorable her daughter was and how quickly she had grown so attached to Rachel.

Shelby honestly thought that the girl would jump for joy. She had been so eager to get to know Shelby these past three months. And in the last month they went to a few outings together, and Rachel even attended one of Shelby's glee practices. Their relationship was, if not blossoming, at least growing.

She had wished that Leroy and Hiram would've mentioned to her before about the shared custody proceedings. She wished they would've eased Rachel into the idea, rather than just throw it on her lap. But, alas, the men had only called Shelby two days ago, asking her to be the one to tell their daughter about it. Those bastards.

The girl sniffled and then looked up, "S-sorry. I, umm, so I can, I can live with you?"

Her aunt Carrie tried to force a smile, but it came out looking more like a tired frown, "Your fathers think it's what's best. But they want to make sure it's what you want too. Of course I think we all know what you want."

Rachel looked at Shelby. Her mother looked so hopeful. And this is exactly what she had dreamed of. So why wasn't she jumping for joy?

She forced a smile out, "You want to be my mom, Shelby?"

"I am your mom Rachel." The tall woman smiled sadly at her small daughter, "I want to be an active mom, yes."

The girl nodded her head, then looked back up at them "But-My daddies, they, they don't want me?" Her voice was just a whisper. Afraid of the answer.

And suddenly Shelby understood her daughter's hesitation towards it all. Carrie took a deep, frustrated breath. Shelby didn't want the blunt woman to make matters worse though, so she spoke first.

"Of course they do, honey." The mother soothed, "They want to give me shared custody. Which means they're still your daddies. But I'd officially be your mom too."

"S-so I'd live with you?" Her big brown eyes looked up at her.

"Only if that's what you want." Shelby reassured her daughter once more, "You can go with your daddies too, of course."

Rachel looked down and squirmed on her seat, "Oh, I, umm, I…oh." Was all the girl could stumble out while her thoughts raged inside her. It was simple yes. Rachel knew this. But the girl was sad. Her dads, where were they? Why didn't they care enough to talk to her about this? Why hadn't they called her this week, like they had promised? Was Shelby their way out of taking care of her? Was she that hard to love?

Carrie, who had tried to keep her cool was growing impatient, "Rachel, I know this is a big decision. But this is also what you've been wishing. Now it's in front of you. Your mother is right here, telling you she wants you. What's the problem now?"

Shelby wanted to turn and glare at the woman but she decided against it. "Sweetheart, would you like some time to think about it? I can come back later. That is okay."

"No!" Rachel looked up quickly, "No. I mean…Please don't leave yet." Her voice was desperate and every time Rachel's insecurity of abandonment came through, all of Shelby's feelings of guilt, and anger towards Rachel's fathers welled up inside of her.

"I won't sweetheart. I'll stay right here, if that's what you want."

Carrie scoffed and this time Shelby couldn't hide her annoyance when she turned to her, "What now?" Shelby tried to ask without annoyance.

Carrie gave Shelby a small and rather satisfied smirk. One that Shelby was not a fan of.

"Rachel say goodbye to Ms. Corcoran. She is leaving."

"What?" Shelby asked incredulously. What the hell was this woman thinking?

Rachel's eyes instantly watered, "No!" She cried, "No, don't make her leave Aunt Carrie!"

But Carrie stood her ground and folded her arms across her chest, "Well you are not answering the question, and Ms. Corcoran is a busy woman. She doesn't have time for your dramatics. Now either you answer whether you'd like for her to share custody with your fathers or she leaves. You will not make her wait here for you to dawdle around." She spoke sternly.

Rachel nodded her head wildly, "I do! I do want her to be my mom for real. I promise I do!" She was crying and wiping at her eyes.

Shelby burned a hole through Carrie with her glare. She really needed to talk to this woman about tact. Clearly, she had no care about Rachel's emotional state.

"Why would you say that?" She hissed at Carrie a disgusted look on her face, then not bothering to hear the woman's indignant response, Shelby turned back to her daughter.

The girl was trying so hard not to continue crying. Her eyes were watery and her lip was quivering. "Hey, hey." Shelby got up and sat down by Rachel then grabbed her cheeks in her hands, forcing Rachel to look at her, "Lovebug don't cry. I'm still here. I'm right here."

"Don't leave. Don't leave! Please. I do want you!" Rachel was so sure she had missed her chance. Her aunt Carrie was sending her mother away, and now Shelby would leave thinking Rachel was ungrateful and for sure want nothing to do with her anymore. She hadn't been quick enough.

"I am not leaving you. Never. Understand me?" Shelby answered her with so much conviction that the sternness surprised Rachel.

So much conviction that it frightened herself. Three months ago she hadn't even known Rachel.

She let go of her daughter and looked at Carrie who was staring at her niece with a slight hint of sympathy.

 _Good._ Shelby thought. _Feel bad for how you made her feel._

"Love," Shelby continued, "Can you tell your Aunt Carrie and I why you seemed upset just now when we asked you about me sharing custody? Does it have to do with your daddies?"

Rachel looked at her aunt first. She wasn't sure if admitting her feelings would make her aunt even madder and she'd make Shelby leave again. Rachel definitely didn't want that. She instinctively brought her knees up to her chest, not caring that her skirt fell to the very tops of her thighs and that her Little Mermaid underwear were on full display. She looked away from both her mother and her aunt and buried her head into her knees.

It was little things like this that showed Shelby that Rachel was yet to develop those preteen inhibitions yet, which some girls her age already had developed. Her own niece, Emma, who was only a few months older than Rachel, but was very independent and happy to explore outside of the hold of her mother and father. She hated public attention from her parents. There were many times that her sass and eyerolls would land her into trouble.

But Shelby also know that Emma loved to snuggle up to her parents when she thought nobody was looking. She loved piggy back rides from her dad, and to be read a bed time story by her mom. Shelby even caught Emma falling asleep on her mother's lap once, her old blanket hugged tightly to her. She had peeked into her oldest sister, Kirsten's, room to ask a question but stopped short of making her presence known when she heard Emma speaking. The girl had fallen out of a tree after roughhousing with some of her friends. Fortunately, the fall just ended with some bruises on her legs and a major cut on her knee. Her father had to carry her back into the house, as it hurt to bend her knee and walk. But Emma didn't cry then. It was the moment her dad walked past her family, up the stairs, and into her parent's room, with her concerned mother right behind that Emma let her tears go, ready to be wholeheartedly taken care of.

" _Can you sing to me mommy?" The 11 year old asked looking up at her mom with tired eyes. Her wound had been cleaned up and now she had a huge bandage on her knee and a few bruises. All the hustle and bustle had tired her out. She was clad only in her favorite pajama shirt, that was covered in Giraffes, and a pair of light grey cotton shorts. Her mother didn't allow her to wear the pants that completed the pajama set because it would rub up on her cut._

" _Of course Em. Do you want me to put Mr. blankie over you?" Shelby's sister whispered soothingly, a look of love that only a mother could provide on her face._

" _No, I'll hold him." The girl said shyly, not bothering to chastise her mother over the use of the term "Mr. Blankie." After all, nobody was there except her mom, so she didn't have to act tough. She had given the name to her blanket when she was a toddler and had stopped consistently calling it that at around 8 years old._

" _Okay, baby. Just close your eyes."_

 _Emma did so and brought the blanket close to her face._

 _As an aunt, Shelby thought it was the cutest thing to see. The usual tomboy of her niece, who that same day refused her mother's help because she was old enough and strong enough to do things on her own, was now cutely curled into her mom at the end of the day, her blankie comfortably in her arms, while the mother patted her back and sang her a lullaby to sleep._

 _Shelby, who had already been speaking with Rachel at the time, imagined herself being able to soothe Rachel to sleep like that one day. It warmed her heart to no end._

"Rach, can you answer the question?" Shelby asked kindly, when she realized that the girl was shutting down. She gently brought the girl's skirt back up to her knees, "Sweetheart, why are you so upset?"

Carrie gave out a deep sigh, knowing her niece well. The 11 year old was afraid of how Carrie might react. She wasn't that scary for God's sake!

"Go ahead, Rachel. I'm not going to get mad." She encouraged.

 _Thank God._ thought Shelby.

Rachel finally lifted her head up, and turned to look at her aunt "How come my dads aren't here?"

Carrie looked momentarily confused, "Rachel, they are in New York. What are you talking about?"

"But-" She looked at her mom, "But you're here. Why aren't they?"

"They are in New York, Rachel. Why would they come down here?" Carrie asked again.

Rachel bit her lip and shuffled her maryjanes once more.

"But this is important. Why aren't they here? Shelby is here. Why didn't they want to talk to me about it?"

Carrie looked to Shelby and searched her mind for an adequate answer. There wasn't one.

"They are just busy Rachel." She said rather flatly, knowing that the small pre-teen was teeming with emotion, and would probably react badly to her words.

She was right.

Rachel's lip began to quiver again but her face didn't crumple, instead anger replaced her shyness, "They're always busy!" Rachel yelled in frustration."They never care! That's why they're giving me to my mom. They don't love me! And you don't love me either!" She yelled at her aunt. Shelby put her hand on Rachel's leg, but the girl pushed it off, "No! Leave me alone!" She screamed at Shelby and got up and away from her. "Everyone leave me alone!"

The mother felt stunned, and her heart tightened. Things were not going so well. She had remembered Carrie telling her that Rachel had a lot of outbursts and storm outs. But it wasn't until then, that the mother could see it.

Rachel was about to gun up the stairs, but Carrie caught her arm and pulled her down to sit next to her.

"Now you listen to me." Carrie said sternly at the girl that who was looking at her rather petulantly, "I care very much for you. I am sorry, Rachel. Sorry that your fathers aren't here. But there is no use in getting mad at others for their mistakes."

Rachel pushed Carrie's arm off her as well and scooted away from her, "NO NO NO!"

Carrie took a deep breath, "That is enough Rachel! Now go into the kitchen, drink some water and sit at the table. I will get you in ten minutes. Then we can talk, and try and even call your fathers if you'd like."

"I don't want a timeout!" Rachel whined, kicking her legs out in anger, "I wanna talk about it now! I wanna talk to _them_ now!" She shook her head furiously.

Carrie tilted her head and narrowed her eyes, "You do not yell at guests, and you do not yell at me. You've earned yourself this timeout. When you calm down we will talk some more. Now, either you'll go sit at the table or I'll stand you up, swat that behind of yours, and send you to the corner. Your choice."

Shelby, for the first time, agreed with the way Carrie was reacting. Although maybe Shelby would've just taken her arm and sat her at the table, rather than dragging it out for the poor girl. It was obvious she was already upset. She needed to cool off, and a timeout was perfect for that, but everything else was not necessary in Shelby's eyes.

Rachel looked towards her mother and blushed. Her aunt was treating her like a baby, and now Shelby would think that it was okay to give her timeouts too.

 **"One." Carrie started threateningly.**

"Aunt Carrie!"

"TWO, Rachel. You're on thin ice."

The girl slowly got up and huffed to the table. Both women heard the chair scrape and the girl flop onto it dramatically.

It was ten minutes later when Rachel, who's head was pitifully hidden in her arms on the table heard her mother's voice.

"Rachel, are you ready to talk again?"

The girl's head popped up, curious as to why her Aunt Carrie wasn't the one to get her. She nodded anyway.

"Where's aunt Carrie?"

"In the living room."

"Oh." The small girl said and gently pushed her water glass further down the table. She laid her head sideways onto the table, so her cheek was on the wood. "I'm sorry for yelling and pushing your hand off me." There was remorse in her words.

Shelby sighed and sat in the chair across from Rachel. The woman had racked her brain while sitting and talking with Carrie about what to say to Rachel. Carrie had asked if she wanted to be the one to take her out of her time out.

 _"_ _Would you like to take her out from there? I think it'll be good practice for the future." The woman gave Shelby a playful smirk._

 _"_ _I guess it's never too early get practice in."_

 _Carrie scoffed, "You will become well acquainted with Rachel's tantrums soon enough."_

 _"Does she usually calm down if you give her time?"_

 _"Yes. She has a short fuse when it comes to things about her dads, but letting her breathe is usually enough for her to come to her senses and realize she was wrong."_

And so Shelby was the one that was sat in front of the 11 year old and not Carrie.

"Can you tell me what you've been thinking about while sitting here?" The woman prodded her young look alike.

Rachel pushed the chair out from the table. She shrugged, "Just mad."

"About your dads?"

She nodded and Shelby gave her a sad smile, "Well, if you promise not to yell and scream, then you, your aunt and I can talk about your dads and how you're feeling. How does that sound?"

Rachel looked up shyly, "That sounds good."

"Okay, but before we go back in, I wanted to tell you that I love you, and I understand why you're mad. You were sent here to breathe and cool off. Understood?"

The girl nodded. Her mom was so good at talking to her. It made Rachel feel so special inside. "Okay. I-I understand."

The woman outstretched her hand and Rachel took it. The girl smiled softly despite her emotions. Her mom holding her hand felt nice.

Shelby pulled Rachel up from the chair and wrapped her in a hug that Rachel was happy to fall into. Her mother rubbed the young girl's back for a moment before letting her go, "Calm enough?"

"Yes ma'am." Rachel replied softly, and so they walked hand in hand back into the living room.

… … …

It was exactly a week later that Rachel stood by the front door, her Clifford hugged tightly to her chest as her uncle and Shelby were moving all of her things into Shelby's black Denali. Her father's had agreed to see Rachel at least once every two months. That was the detail that Shelby required of them in order for her to sign the shared custody papers. She wanted the two men to still be a part of Rachel's life because it was clear to Shelby that Rachel, no matter how angry she was at her dads, still loved them dearly. The woman had much more leeway about these decision honestly because she could petition for full custody, but wouldn't do so because she didn't want to bruise the men's egos. It was basically full custody and they all knew it.

But as excited as Rachel was about her dream finally coming true of meeting her mother, the amount of change happening was throwing her for a loop. Nothing was normal, everything was new.

Shelby's hand on her back brought the child back to the present, "Ready to say bye, Rach?"

Rachel only nodded and swallowed hard as she was led into the kitchen where her family was. They all looked a little sad, and it kind of unnerved the 11 year old. She thought that her uncle would be sad, and maybe just a little teensy sadnees by her aunt Carrie. But even her cousins? Now, that was weird.

Her uncle was the first one to stand up and pull her in. He picked her up into his arms easily, "Now I know that we'll still see you around. But I'm gonna miss always having you here. You come over whenever you'd like Rachel."

Rachel nodded and clung to him tightly. She suddenly felt an ache in her stomach and fought hard to say that she didn't want to leave and wanted to stay for a little bit longer. "I love you." She told him. The tall man let a tear fall, "I love you too Rach."

He finally let her go and her Aunt Carrie stood in front of her, "You be good, okay? No crying, no screaming, no singing too loud. Okay?"

Shelby bit her lip and stopped herself from saying anything. But she'd talk to Rachel later about that. She wanted Rachel to know that it was okay to show her emotions, instead of waiting for it all to bottle up and explode into a tantrum.

"I'll try aunt Carrie."

"Well come here and give me a hug then." She said in her usual stern sounding voice.

Rachel, tentatively took a step forward then felt herself embraced in a hug. She was squeezed tight and the small framed girl squeezed tightly back. "Don't make your mother change her mind, now." Carrie warned, not realizing how seriously Rachel took it.

Rachel tensed, and that was enough for Shelby to step in, "I won't change my mind kiddo. She was joking. I never will. Rachel, okay? I never will change my mind about this."

Carrie let Rachel go and gave Shelby an annoyed look before looking at Rachel, "She knows that. It's all to make sure she understands to behave. You understand, Rachel? Just behave."

The poor girl was getting too many conflicting answers, and she just wanted to not deal with any of it. Luckily, her cousin Lindsay saved her.

"Bye shrimp. I'll see you around, I'm sure. Don't forget that we're still your family."

Rachel hugged her and Lindsay rolled her eyes but hugged back. "I love you Linnie. You'll always be my cousin."

"Of course I will Rach. I'll probably see you next weekend, calm down shrimp."

Shelby watched Rachel say her goodbyes. The mother swore Rachel's oldest cousin, Ron, had some tears in his eyes. Seeing the tall boy react so emotionally to his baby cousin leaving their home, made even Shelby emotional. Finally Rachel looked up expectantly at the woman she'd be living with. Her mother. Shelby smiled down and outstretched her hand. The small girl took it and they soon left the home.

 **... ... ...**

Shelby eyed Rachel who was in the backseat of her SUV as they went home.

 _This is hard for her. It might be a rough transition. It might not. Let her lead._ That's what her sister had told her the day before as Shelby admitted her worries.

As the youngest, Shelby always had a constant stream of advice from her brother, sister, and mother. Her father was more hands off, but he was always there for her should she want it. All this advice could be both a blessing and a curse for the youngest Corcoran.

But looking at the quiet child in the back, made Shelby want to pause the moment and run to her mom for advice. She really didn't want to screw this up.

 _You are the mother now, Shelby_. She reminded herself.

"So, Rach, are you hungry?" That seemed like a pretty softball question. "Do you want me to make some food once we get home?"

Home. That word hit Rachel like a ton of bricks. For her whole life, no place ever truly felt like home. And if she was honest with herself, she wasn't sure how long her mother would be able to stand her before 'home' was back at her dads' or her aunt's. Like her aunt Carrie had said she had to behave or else her mother would grow tired of her. But Rachel knew herself and it would only be a matter of time before she messed up, and her mom would want to send her back or something.

"Rachel?" Shelby asked again.

"I'm not hungry." She mumbled before looking out the window, but it was only a matter of seconds before Rachel's eyes shot up and back at her mom. What if Shelby got mad for her refusal, "Is-is that okay? That I'm not hungry. Is that okay?"

Shelby eyed her through the rearview mirror, "Of course, sweetheart. You don't have to eat if you're not hungry. I'll help you settle into your room, and I'll show you around the place. Then we can take it easy, and watch a movie. I got the Inside Out DVD because I know you like it so much."

"Really, you did Shelby?!" The girl's lips curled into a wide smile. Her worries momentarily forgotten. She was after all, 11 years old, and still very much a child.

Shelby's heart warmed at the excitement written all over her daughter's face. "Yes little lady. It's in the living room waiting for us."

"Can we have popcorn as we watch?" She leaned in closer to the front seat and clapped her hands excitedly. She never got to watch her favorite movies because her cousins always took the remote from her, and whenever they ate popcorn together she was always too slow and was left with basically nothing.

Shelby chuckled, "Yes, we can have popcorn, but lean back into your seat lovebug. It's safer that way."

Rachel pumped a fist in the air, "Yes!" before following her mother's directions and sitting back.

… … ….

The young girl's eyes stayed nice, round, and wide, as she looked around her mother's home. It was bigger than her aunt's, but not as luxurious as her fathers'. She let her fingers touch the soft plush of the gray sectional couch. She looked at the 65 inch screen that hung on the wall. There was a throw rug underneath the living room table where the remotes laid. There was also a small shelf of movies under the television. Rachel looked up to aske her mother a question but her mom was no longer in the room. She could see that the woman had moved back outside to grab her things. Rachel's curiosity got the best of her and she picked up Clifford where she had left him and went up the stairs.

"Rachel, can you help me with-" Her question fell flat as her daughter was no longer in the living room, "Rachel? Where'd you go?" She closed the door and set her daughter's suitcase down.

There was still one more suitcase and a box to get out from the car. The woman sighed and went to do that before going in search of her daughter.

Rachel looked at all the picture frames which dotted the walls of the hallway. She hadn't even gone into any of the rooms as she looked at all the people in the pictures closely.

"That's your family."

Rachel wasn't expecting her mom and the comment made her jump a bit.

Shelby stepped closer and put a hand on her daughter's back, "That one right there is my mother and my father."

Rachel quirked her head as she stared. The woman had her mom's same hair color, and looked to be a bit shorter than Shelby, but she could see that her mom got her height from her father. Shelby also had her father's eyes and nose. She looked from the picture to her mom and back. "Wow." Was all the girl could say.

"Those are your cousins. Her name is Emma, and those two are Lewis and Andrea.."

"Will I, will I get to meet everyone?" There was hesitation in her voice.

Shelby nodded and moved her arm around the girl's shoulders, "Yes, you will. I was going to talk with you about meeting them maybe two weeks from now? They live about 45 minutes away, and it's my father's birthday in two weeks."

Rachel felt a slight hint of worry. She was so very hard to like, and maybe her mom was blind to it, but all these strangers certainly wouldn't be.

"Oh, umm, o-okay then."

Shelby took her daughter's reaction in for a moment. She bent down and grabbed her daughter's cheeks in her hands, "But if you don't want to meet them two weeks from now, we can wait Rach. That's no problem."

"Do they, do they know about me?"

Shelby nodded, "Of course they do. I've told them all about you. They're all very excited to meet you actually."

The small girl couldn't help but shuffle her feet and look at her mom with those pouty brown eyes, "Shelby, what if, what if they don't like me?" The question fell heavily onto Shelby's heart, but the tears that welled up in her daughter's eyes was worse.

"Oh, Rachie." She cooed, "They're going to love you."

Rachel shook her head and gave a stomp of her foot, "You don't know that! I'm DIFFICULT!" Her words came pouring out, and suddenly she was on a long rant, that once more revealed her insecurities, "That's what my dad says. He always says I'm difficult, and, I don't, I don't know why you like me so much, but if you see that your family doesn't like me, then maybe you won't like me too!"

Rachel's eyes had silent tears making their way down, but she quickly wiped them "And then you'll change your mind. And I don't want you to change your mind." She had to wipe some more tears again.

Damn it! She wasn't supposed to be crying.

 _You crybaby_! Came the constant taunt of all her family.

But the thought only made her cry more. Shelby quickly stood up and led the emotional Rachel into her room. "Sweetheart, Rachel." She said softly.

"I'm sorry!" Rachel sobbed, trying to control her hitching cries. She was ruining everything! She had only been there a total of 20 minutes. How was she already bawling?!

"Shhh. Lovey. Don't apologize." Shelby led her to the bed and kissed the crying girl's forehead, "Sit down on my bed, okay? I'm going to get some tissues and then we're going to talk."

The girl could only nod as she hopped up on her mother's bed, her legs dangling in the air as it was too high up. She was too upset to register that it was her first time stepping into her mother's room.

Meanwhile it was clear to the mother that Rachel needed a lot of reassurance. Shelby didn't mind at all. She was happy that Rachel had admitted those things, but it didn't make Shelby feel any better to know in how much emotional turmoil her daughter was living through.

Shelby returned from her ensuite bathroom and smiled sadly at her small daughter who's crying had turned into hiccups.

"My sweet girl." Shelby sat down and lifted her daughter's chin softly and began the work of wiping her tears. Rachel sniffled throughout the process. "Keep your head still. Deep breaths Rach. Deep breaths."

Shelby wanted so desperately for her daughter to stop crying.

"Before I say anything else," The woman started, "I want to tell you that nothing you do, nothing you say, absolutely nothing in the world can happen that will make me think that becoming a part of your life was a bad idea." Shelby told her sniffling daughter. Wiping the last of her tears.

"But, but- "

"Nope." Shelby ended it before Rachel could start, and put the tissue under Rachel's nose, "Blow." She ordered gently.

The girl pouted and shook her head, but one raised eyebrow made her comply. Didn't moms do that to little kids? Geez! She was 11 years old already! She didn't need help blowing her nose, for pete's sake!

Regardless though, Shelby made sure that her nose was squeaky clean, making her blow once more, before leaving her be.

"So let's start from the beginning Rach." Shelby started which made the girl sigh heavily. "Why do you think my family won't like you?"

The eleven year old looked at her socked feet in front of her and shrugged, "My daddies didn't want me. My cousins think I'm annoying and aunt Carrie says I'm always frustrating her and she can never catch a break. And well, I don't, I don't have too many friends at school. But you, you already know that."

Shelby nodded sadly. She had picked Rachel up from school once and witnessed her daughter getting pushed and called a loser by one of the other girls who was part of a clique. Shelby stepped in quickly and threatened with calling the girls' mothers, but they quickly turned remorseful at the sight of Shelby. In the car Rachel had refused to talk about it, and quickly changed the subject to other things.

"You know buddy, I just think that you're misunderstood, especially by your daddies, and you aunt Carrie and cousins. I don't think the way your dads treated you was very fair. You did nothing wrong. They did. But I promise you that things will start to be different. I already love you to the moon and back and so will everyone in my family."

Rachel found all this so hard to believe, but the way her mom was speaking was making it seem so real. So true. "Misunderstood? What-what does that mean?"

Shelby smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind Rachel's ear, "It means you are so special that some people don't know how to deal with it."

Rachel liked that explanation and wrinkled her nose when her mom bopped it, "So it's not my fault?"

"No." Shelby reassured her, "None of this is your fault. I know you find it hard to believe. But I'll keep telling you until you believe me. None of this is on you Rachel. Nothing at all."

Rachel wrung her hand and bit her lip, "I know I can be a crybaby though." She frowned, "I'm sorry I started crying already. I was trying so hard not to since leaving my aunt's house."

"Hey now." Shelby lifted the embarrassed girl's chin, "Rachel, you are allowed to cry. You're allowed to have emotions and not be ashamed of them. Although we might need to work on your tantrums little missy." Shelby added with a stern look.

The eleven year old blushed at the tantrum comment. But Shelby didn't dwell on it to Rachel's relief. She scooted closer to Shelby and laid her head on her shoulder. Shelby placed a kiss on the top of her head wanting to turn to mush at her daughter's gesture. Shelby was becoming Rachel's safe place, and they both recognized this.

"Love, I want you to know that it is okay to not be okay. You've been through a lot sweetheart, even for an adult to handle, and you're only 11. That's a big deal."

"I-I don't know how to feel. I'm, I'm sad because I left my aunt Carrie's house, even if they were mean to me sometimes. I'm confused about my dads, but I'm so happy to be here with you."

"How about whenever you feel really overwhelmed with your emotions, you try and talk them out with me? What you just told me now, that's good. That's really good. I'll help you work through it. Like, you being sad, that makes sense because your aunt Carrie and your uncle and cousins, they're your family and you love them. It makes sense that moving away from them will make you sad."

"So you won't be mad if sometimes I feel sad?"

Shelby shook her head and squeezed Rachel's knee gently, "Never in a million years will I be mad. I might want to talk with you about it though."

"I like talking to you."

"I like talking to you too baby." Shelby gushed, "And I'm always here for you. I'm your mom. That's my job and it's an honor for me to have the opportunity to be there for you. And if something is too hard for you to say you can even write it down. Whatever is easiest for you."

It was moments like these that made Rachel feel like she was in a dream. How could her mother be so nice?

"I wish I wasn't so sad." The girl said softly, "I just wanna be happy that I'm here."

Shelby hugged her tight, "You just feel really hard baby girl. Your emotions are so strong because you are compassionate."

Rachel took her mother's words in and wrung her hands some more letting her mom rub her back and soothe her.

"I like it when you call me nicknames like baby girl." She admitted moments later, hiding her face in her mom's chest. Shelby's heart fluttered.

"And I like to call you those names. Because you are exactly all of that. You're my sweetheart, my little lovebug, and my baby girl."

"And Rachie. I'm your Rachie too."

The woman chuckled and placed her chin atop Rachel's head, "Right! You are my Rachie too. Forever and always."

"Forever?" Rachel's eyes lit up and she looked so happy to hear the word forever. It stung Shelby to see such hope. Stability. Her daughter craved it, and she was finally receiving it.

"Yes. Forever."

A few moments later Shelby gently pulled away from Rachel, "How 'bout you take a shower in my bathroom and put your pjs on? I'll take them out of your suitcase and bring them to you."

Rachel's brow instantly furrowed, "But it's only five o' clock! I don't wanna go to bed yet."

Shelby restrained an eye roll, "I know. I just thought you might wanna be comfortable as we watch Inside Out."

"But I won't have to go to bed afterwards right?" She needed to be sure that her mom wasn't trying to trick her.

Shelby shook her head, although it was obvious that Rachel would be tired by the end of the movie, "Nope. Your bedtime is 9:30. Just like at your aunt's."

Rachel sighed and hopped off the bed, "Okay."

Shelby stood up with her and led her into the bathroom, "Here, I'll show you where everything is."

Once in Shelby directed Rachel to start to undress while she placed some age appropriate toiletries in the shower for Rachel. Hers were boutique bought and figured Rachel would prefer something less fancy. She turned and noticed that Rachel was having trouble taking her skirt off

"Need some help?"

"The zipper always gets stuck on this skirt." Rachel mumbled, pulling harder and harder.

Shelby stepped in quickly, "Hold on, you'll rip it like that. Let me help." She bent down and moved Rachel's hands from the skirt. The girl got frustrated so easily. Her face already looked annoyed. But the mother was gentle. She pulled where the zipper was stuck on the fabric and finally pulled it down, and helped Rachel out of the skirt. "See? Easy peezy." Shelby remarked with a smile.

Rachel gave her mom a smile, oblivious and uncaring that she was standing without bottoms in front of her. She felt comfortable. She didn't care. And Shelby had seen her like this before, when they went swimming together once and Shelby had to help her out of her bathing suit.

"Thank you."

Shelby patted her bottom twice, "No problem kiddo. Sit down and take your shoes off Rach. I'll be back with your pjs."

"Where will my room be?" Rachel asked Shelby once she came back in.

The 11 year old was now sitting on the toilet seat, in just her panties and penguin sweater. Her mom placed a towel on the hook near the shower, and Rachel's favorite Clifford the Big Red Dog nightshirt along with a clean pair of underwear and socks on the counter.

"It's at the other end of the hall." Shelby was excited to show the room to her daughter, "Everything we ordered for it is already there! I'll show you after your shower."

Rachel's eyes widened in excitement, "Really? Let's go now! I wanna see it now!" She jumped off the seat, wearing one sock that was only half on, the other already off and headed towards the door. The flash of her bumblebee underwear and black penguin sweater was all her mother saw.

But Shelby caught the back of her sweater before she could reach the door, "Nuh-uh. Shower first, little lady."

Rachel's shoulders dropped, "But Shelby!"

"No ma'am. In the shower."

"I just wanna see it." Rachel argued pulling away from Shelby's grip. "Why can't I just go see it really quickly?"

Shelby looked down at her little girl. Her willfulness clearly coming back. But Shelby was just as willful, and she was the mother. She had the upperhand.

 _I can see putting my foot down will have to come sooner rather than later._ Shelby thought. She hoped that "soon" wouldn't be now though.

"You will see it. Afterward. Right now you need to take a shower."

"Shelby!"

And Shelby swore she heard all the times her niece Emma whined to her mom. " _But mom I don't wanna go to bed!"_ , " _Mom, please! I wanna go with Lewis and Andrea!,"_ Or, the one that always ended up with Emma in tears. Getting her to eat her vegetables. " _Mommy, they're gross! I don't want to eat the carrots!"_

"Kiddo, you are basically just in your undies! You need to get in the shower." The mother exclaimed, focusing back on her child.

"So?" Rachel sassed, "It's just me and you!" She tried to move towards the door, but Shelby caught her once more, and lifted up her sweater in the process. Her voice all of a sudden no nonsense. "Arms up. This is coming off, and you are going in the shower Rachel."

The girl could see that her mother's tone changed. She gave in and lifted her arms up, not wanting to get into any trouble just yet. She missed the look of relief that crossed her mother's face. The woman was happy that "soon" would be some other day.

Shelby lifted the sweater all the way off, leaving Rachel's upper body completely bare. Not that she had anything to show, which some of the girls in her class made fun of her for. It's not like they had much either anyway!

But either way Rachel just wanted to see her room. What was the big deal?! She glared at her mom's back while Shelby turned on the water and adjusted the knobs.

"No pouting kiddo." Shelby told her once she turned and caught her daughter's stare, "After your shower, you can see your room. Is that a deal?" Shelby asked crossing her arms across her chest.

She wanted to show Rachel that there would be structure in her home, and she was the mother and Rachel the child. Maybe letting her go see the room before getting into the shower was not a big deal, but Shelby wanted to teach Rachel self control.

"Yeah, deal." The girl answered forlornly. Her mother won that round.

"Great!" Shelby replied brightly and moved away, "And make sure you wash yourself properly Rachel. No going fast." The woman added before closing the door to give Rachel some privacy.

Damn it! Foiled. Shelby certainly fell into mother mode rather quickly. Rachel thought. She couldn't remember a time when she was watched so closely before. This was definitely a transition.

Shelby walked out and paused, chuckling to herself. Three months ago, she never would've thought that she'd be corralling her 11 year old into the shower. Three months ago she didn't even have an 11 year old to begin with. Life would certainly be different. The mother quickly went into Rachel's room and started putting away some of the girl's clothes.

"Shelby?" She heard Rachel call. "I'm done!"

Shelby walked out and closed the door to Rachel's room. She then saw as a clean, freshly showered Rachel ran to her from the other end of the hall. She looked so carefree and young to the mother, and Shelby momentarily wondered if her heart would ever be her own again, because Rachel had stolen it from her so quickly.

"Can I see my room now? Can I see it?!" The child jumped up and down in excitement as she held onto her mom's hands. "Yes, yes." Shelby laughed and opened the door. The gasp and squeal of excitement when Rachel saw her room, made Shelby wish she could rewind and hear her daughter's reaction just one more time.

"It's beautiful!" She exclaimed in wonder. Her bed was decorated with light green and pink bedding. She went and laid down, outstretching her tiny frame right in the middle of it, "It's so comfy and big!" She looked to her mom and smiled widely. She sat up and jumped a bit on it.

Shelby stood by the doorframe watching before walking further in.

To the side of Rachel's bed was a white desk and a green desk lamp. Her name was spelled out in block letters atop her desk. In one corner of the room there was also a large rocking chair. Rachel didn't know it, but her mother had bought that chair while pregnant with Rachel and would sit and talk to her unborn child on many occasions. There was also an alcove where the window was. Shelby had bought a large fleece blanket and a mountain of fluffy pillows for the spot. Rachel could already tell that she was going to love that part of her room. Right next to it was a bookshelf, and Rachel immediately noticed that her mother bought her the Hunger Games collection which she had talked about a few times. The girl immediately stood up on the bed and jumped into the air so her mom could catch her.

"Rachel!" Shelby exclaimed, but caught her just in time. Her daughter was clearly trying to give her a heart attack.

"Thank you, thank you! You're the best mom ever!"

And that was all Shelby needed to dissolve into a puddle. The scolding on the tip of her tongue disappeared. She hugged her daughter tight as Rachel wrapped her legs around her, "You're welcome sweetheart. I love you so much."

Rachel snuggled her head onto Shelby's shoulder and breathed in her mother's scent.

God, could her kid be any cuter? Shelby could just feel her body sag with so much emotion. She sniffled a bit, as her eyes welled up with tears. This moment was perfect.

Rachel lifted her head, "Are you crying?" She panicked, "Did I make you cry?"

Shelby shook her head and smiled at her daughter who was still in her arms. She really was a light child.

"I'm just happy to be able to do all of this for you, and to get to hold you."

She was about to put her down but Rachel tightened her hold around Shelby's neck, "C-can you hold me just for a little bit longer?"

Yes. It _was_ possible for her daughter to get cuter. Shelby hugged her closer, "Of course, lovebug." Shelby felt her daughter relax into her embrace and yawn. She did a quick look at the clock on Rachel's nightstand. It was 6pm. "How 'bout we go downstairs and cuddle. I'll make popcorn like you asked."

"Okay." Rachel nodded, but made no move to want to leave her mom's hold. Shelby smiled, loving how affectionate her 11 year old was. The mother had known this before, from all the time they had spent together prior, but to know that Rachel was finally hers, made it all the more sweeter. Their relationship would finally be able to grow so much more.

Shelby grabbed Clifford from the bed, then moved towards the stairs and stopped short. "I'm gonna put you down kiddo. So we can walk down the steps."

She put her daughter down and let Rachel take the lead.

Soon enough Rachel had Clifford in her arms, the Inside Out menu on the screen, and was all wrapped up in a blanket. She watched her mom who was in the kitchen and smiled.

Shelby sat next to her and put the popcorn on her daughter's lap, "Freshly popped!"

"It was in a bag. That doesn't make it fresh!" The girl teased. Shelby rolled her eyes, "Well freshly microwaved then."

Before Shelby started the movie though, Rachel stopped her. There was something that she wanted to talk to Shelby about for a while now, and she had just told Rachel that it was okay to talk to her about her worries. So she tentatively decided to take the step, "Umm Shelby?"

"Hmmm?"

"Ummm."

 _Don't do it. Don't do it!_ Her mind backed out.

"Nothing. Nevermind." Rachel shook her head and looked away. Unfortunately, that wasn't good enough for Shelby.

"Sweetheart, what is it?"

Rachel bit her lip.

 _Great. Now you have to tell her. What if she doesn't want you to? It's not like she's ever mentioned it before!_

Shelby furrowed her eyebrow and watched as Rachel debated with herself. Wanting to make her as comfortable as possible, the mother moved the popcorn out of the way and moved closer. Rachel immediately laid her head on her mother's lap not wanting to look her in the eye and knowing that Shelby would play with her hair and make her feel safe and comfortable again.

"You can tell me Rach. Remember? You can talk to me about anything."

 _Just do it. She's giving you an in. Do it, don't be a baby!_

"Ummm, when, when can I-" She hugged her Clifford dog tighter, "When can I call you...mom?" She pulled her knees in closer to herself, "If that's okay. I mean, if you let me call you mom. I know you haven't mentioned it yet, so I wasn't sure-"

She felt herself being righted back up by Shelby, and was surprised to see the woman's eyes watery yet again, "You can call me 'mom' whenever you feel comfortable. I didn't mention it because I didn't want you to feel pushed. I wanted it be natural for you."

Her daughter's dark brown eyes looked deeply at her, cutting any shred of insecurities that Shelby had about being a mother. This little girl was hers, and she would do anything to make sure she was loved and secure for the rest of her life.

"I've been wanting to call you mom since I first found out who you were." Rachel admitted.

Shelby nodded happily and let tears fall down her face, "Lovebug, you don't know how much that means to me."

The girl grabbed the bottom of her shirt and brought it up, sweetly wiping her mom's face. Shelby couldn't help but smile at her daughter's gesture.

"So you're taking care of me now?" Shelby teased softly.

Rachel shrugged, "I don't like it when you cry."

"Not even happy tears?" Shelby asked as Rachel brought her shirt back down. Her child looked at her timidly, "No one's ever told me about happy tears until today. I, I don't know if I've ever cried happy tears."

The mother pushed away the feeling of sadness that her daughter's comment brought and maneuvered the small girl onto her lap, "Well you should get used to it, because there will be a lot of happy tears in this house, love."

Rachel smiled and leaned her head into her mom's chest, feeling at home. For the first time ever. She felt at home. And it wasn't the house itself. It wasn't her new room. Or anything physical. It was her mother's embrace. That was her home.

Shelby rocked them both and kissed her daughter's forehead, "Let's start that movie, Rach?"

"Yeah, mhmm." Rachel mumbled, content to just stay close to her mom.

 _She'll be asleep before the movie ends._ Shelby thought.

Sure enough, Rachel was out midway through. Her mother's comforting strokes on her temple weren't helping her stay awake either. Shelby had paused the movie and looked down at her daughter, half of her body was laying on her lap. Rachel looked so calm and peaceful. With her Clifford close to her chest Shelby could imagine what a toddler Rachel was like.

"My baby girl." Shelby whispered, "I will always take care of you." She shifted her sleeping daughter up and into her arms, so she could take her to bed. It probably would've been easier for Shelby to wake her up and have her walk up the stairs, but one look at her daughter's angelic face told her to do otherwise. Besides, Rachel was light enough to carry up the stairs.

Once in her daughter's room, Shelby laid her down and covered her up with the large fleece blanket. She sat down on the bed and stroked Rachel's hair for a while, not wanting the moment to end as she looked at her daughter. Shelby couldn't understand how she was expected to leave this child out of her sight. She was so young, so tiny.

Oh my God. Her daughter was already 11. The teenage years were soon. It made her heart rate speed up just thinking about it. And the boys! Rachel was beautiful. How was she supposed to protect her from _everything?_

 _Shelby! Stop and breathe! Get. It. Together!_

"God, this is what first time moms must feel like." She murmured to herself through a loud sigh.

"Wha?" Rachel slurred, her eyes slowly opening.

"Shhh. I was just talking to myself." Shelby whispered, "Back to sleep lovebug." She began rubbing her daughter's tummy, hoping to ease her once more. It worked as Rachel's eyes closed once more, and a content smile curled onto her lips.

"Goodnight my sweet girl." Shelby finally willed herself to say.

"G'night mom." Rachel whispered just loud enough. And it was right then that Shelby was sure those words, said just like that, in a sleepy whisper would forever be tattooed on her heart.

 **Please review! I hope you liked it :D**


	4. Bullied Fears

Shelby woke up to the sound of rain. The woman smiled at the serenity of the noise and laid there for a few minutes before deciding to check on her daughter. It was only 6:17 and figured that her 11 year old would still be sound asleep.

 _Her Daughter._ Rachel was hers. It still felt like a dream. It'd been two weeks of Rachel staying with her, and she counted every day as a gift. Rachel was willful, even stubborn to a fault, but sensitive at her core. She was cuddly and loveable. She was funny and adorable. Everything that SHelby had dreamed and so much more.

The mother threw on an NYU hoodie over her tank top. Winter was coming and the temperature was gradually dropping.

Carefully, Shelby opened her daughter's door, but was surprised to see that the girl wasn't in bed. Although never difficult to wake up, Rachel usually wasn't awake until at least 8 in the morning on weekends. At least that's what Shelby was able to determine from the two weekends they've had together.

The mother checked the bathroom, but she wasn't there.

"Rachel?" She called out once in the hallway.

 _Don't panic. She's somewhere._

When she went downstairs and into the kitchen she saw her daughter immediately. She rolled her eyes when she realized that the tightness in her chest immediately deflated. Motherhood had made her such a worrier.

Rachel was sitting on the porch outside. Her feet tucked up onto the swinging bench, Clifford was hugged tightly to her, a blanket around her shoulders, and she was staring out at the rain. Shelby quietly made her way over, but the door opening caught the young girl's attention.

Rachel turned her head and gave her mother a small smile, "Morning." Her voice was still heavy with sleep.

Shelby went over and sat next to her, feeling Rachel immediately lay her head on her lap. She ran a hand through her daughter's hair, "You're up early sweetheart."

The rain was a gentle backdrop that soothed both of them.

"I like the sound of rain." Rachel spoke softly. "I never got to go outside and see it in the morning when I was with my daddies." She explained easily. Her mom was so easy talk to, "I always thought it looked pretty in the morning, and one time I went outside on the balcony and my dad yanked me back inside and yelled at me for scaring them because they couldn't find me in my room."

Rachel had done the same thing with Shelby just now, but the mother couldn't imagine treating her harshly over it.

"How old were you?"

"I was 8." Rachel told her, closing her eyes and breathing softly as her mother played with her hair, "They made a rule and told me because I was bad I was never allowed to go play outside when it was raining. I don't know why they got so mad though. I didn't mean to scare them."

Rather suddenly, the girl lifted her head from her mom's lap and scooted away, "D-did you know about that rule?" Her eyes had a hint of fear, "Was I supposed to follow it here? I-they told my aunt about it, was I-"

Shelby felt her heart tighten again, "Rachie, no." She shook her head and placed her hands on her daughter's cheeks, "No you don't have to follow that rule here. You can come outside, as long as it's in the backyard and look at the rain all you want."

"Y-you're sure?" The girl was still skeptical.

"1000%"

Rachel quirked her eyebrow, "There's no such thing as 1000%!" She pointed out.

Shelby rolled her eyes, "Okay, my little know it all. 100% then. Now come lay back down. I like the rain too but I really like you snuggled up to me."

Rachel easily complied. Her mom was so nice. Sure, she was kind of stern sometimes with Rachel in a way that affected the little girl more then her dads' yells and her aunt's frustrated insults and scoldings. Shelby was also always...well…. _there,_ which was a little weird and different from what she was used to, but her mom loved her in this different way from anyone else. Like, she loved being around Rachel, and never grew tired of her. That was a first for the small brunette.

"Why did you wake up so early, love?" Shelby asked after some time.

Rachel, whose eyes were closed, bugged wide open. She couldn't possibly tell her mom the real reason. See, she had started having nightmares since moving into her mother's house. The girl didn't want to admit that to Shelby because she didn't want her mom to feel bad, or blame herself.

Each time, the nightmare had the same end. Rachel would be snatched away from Shelby.

Sometimes she woke up crying, other nights her breathing was ragged and her heart felt like it would jump out of her chest. This morning when she woke up, it was the latter.

Shelby curled into her mom, but still hadn't answered her question.

"Honey?"

The 11 year old racked her brain, "I-I had to use the restroom."

The unease was obvious to Shelby, but she chalked it up to the girl being nervous about moving around their home freely still.

"Okay." Shelby wouldn't prod her any longer, and pushed the bench swing a bit so that it rocked them.

"Thank you for letting me watch the rain."

Shelby saw the grateful look in her daughter's eyes as they gleamed towards the falling water. She had to force herself to push all her frustrated thoughts towards Leroy and Hiram far away, and just focus on the small preteen. The fact that Rachel was so happy for being allowed to do something simple as watching rain was a sad thought for the mother.

"You don't have to thank me baby girl." Her eyes were watery and she quickly wiped them, not wanting Rachel to see her cry.

Mother and daughter stayed like that until Shelby realized ten minutes later that Rachel had fallen back asleep. She carefully picked her up and went back inside, placing her on the couch and covering her up with the deep purple throw blanket her daughter had taken with her outside.

She caressed her cheek and watched her breathe in and out for a moment. Her baby girl. It took her 11 years, but she finally had her back, "Sweet dreams sweetheart."

…. ….. …..

Rachel had finally woken up again at around 10 am. It truly surprised Shelby because the girl was usually up earlier.

It smelled like pancakes. Her favorite. And it was the odor that finally made her eyes blink open. She pushed off the blanket and sat up rubbing the sleep out of her eyes with her fist. The girl leaned over the couch's armrest and saw her mom in the kitchen making breakfast. She hopped off and sneakily went up behind her mother and hugged her from behind.

Selby jumped and dropped the mixing spoon into the bowl. She smiled to herself when she realized what was happening.

The mother turned around to give her daughter a proper hug, "Good morning mom." Rachel said with a smile on her face and looking up with adoring eyes, ones that Shelby knew would weasel the girl out of trouble if she didn't learn to defend herself against them.

"Good morning little bug. Hungry for breakfast?"

Rachel nodded and let go of her hold, "Pancakes are my favorite! Did you know that already?"

"Yes ma'am. Your aunt told me. That's why I made them!" Shelby pointed out, "Why don't you go upstairs and get ready for the day? We have to get you some more winter clothes, remember?"

Rachel's face lit up. Her mom had totally promised her that they'd go shopping today. She had forgotten about that, but was overjoyed that her mother kept her promise.

"I haven't been to the mall in forever!" Rachel jumped up happily. Her mom gently directed her towards the stairs with a small chuckle, "Well go get ready, and we'll get there quicker."

Rachel was running up the stairs in a second, "Okay!" She called back to her mom.

Shelby watched her go up and scatter to her room. It was true that Rachel was in need of some more hefty winter clothes. She had one durable coat, and that was it. Apparently the Berry men had only bought her that school coat, and didn't think she needed anything else because they rarely went out with her on the weekends. She would spend her days inside the apartment while her dads went out and had fun. So, a coat for her uniform was really all she needed.

Rachel came back down in white tights, a blue skirt and a white long sleeve shirt. It was clear that what she was wearing had been the uniform that the girl used when she went to school in New York. Shelby had come to realize that most of Rachel's clothes was school uniform and a few other pieces. Her life had only been school and home for such a long time.

But Shelby didn't try and point it out to Rachel. Instead, she'd just buy Rachel more clothes. There was no need to embarrass the girl.

Shelby watched as Rachel ate her pancakes at the island of the kitchen. Her feet kicked up and down happily.

She set a glass of milk down for the girl, in what now had become Rachel's favorite star cup, "I'm going to go get ready, alright? I'll be down in 15 minutes."

Rachel grinned up at her and mumbled out a " 'kay."

She couldn't wait to go out shopping with her mom.

When Shelby came down, Rachel was already in the living room. Her socked feet were dangling from the top of the couch as she watched TV upside down.

The mother shook her head at the sight, slightly chuckling. "Rach, what're you doing?" She walked around the couch and sat the girl up straight, "Watching Disney." She said emphatically. The fact that she could watch TV without anyone taking the remote from her was a new concept.

Her daughter's innocence was what Shelby loved the most. The way her eyes grew in excitement over the tiniest of things, and the way she unabashedly would run into her mom's arms when Shelby would pick her up after work. It all made the mother melt.

"You ready to go shopping?" She looked down at her daughter's pink socked feet, "Where are your shoes?"

Rachel got up and skidded off towards the front door where her blue Converse were. "They're right here!" She pulled them on and stood up, "All ready!"

Shelby grabbed her keys and sunglasses. By the time she turned around Rachel was already out the door.

Patience. That's one thing Rachel still needed to learn.

The girl was standing by the passenger door, ready for Shelby to unlock it. But Shelby rose an unimpressed eyebrow, "Backseat Rachel. You know that."

Rachel choosing to ignore her mom's look, which usually worked to put the teacher's students in line, pouted miserably, "But I'm 11 now!" She argued, "I should be able to sit up front."

Shelby sighed and walked around the car. She gently grabbed the girl's hand despite the girl's huff and moved her to the back door. "You are still too small to be sitting in the front seat. It's safer for you to be in the back."

She let go of Rachel's hand and unlocked the door. Wisely, she waited until Rachel opened the door and got in to make her own way into the car.

The little pout on her daughter's face didn't go unnoticed as she backed out into the street.

"It's for your safety Rachel." Shelby reminded her.

"I'm 11." Rachel said again. Her arms crossed against her chest, making her look not so 11.

"I know you are sweetie" Shelby hoped to placate her, not wanting to tell her daughter that pouting wasn't making her case any stronger, "Sitting in the back doesn't make you any younger."

Rachel really was a little thing, and Shelby didn't want to risk her being in the front seat, should an accident happen. It was also regulation for any child 4' 9'' and under to be in the backseat.

But the mother didn't want to start the trip on the wrong foot, "Do you want to choose where we go to lunch?"

That made Rachel slightly happier. She nodded her head and gave her mom a small smile. Her mom was overprotective about dumb stuff like where she needed to be sitting in the car, but she also let her choose a lot of things she wanted to do and that always made Rachel happy.

All the good things about her mom kinda outweighed the bad. And honestly there was probably only one or two bad things. Like making her eat gross vegetables, and making sure everything she did was "safe." Still, she had the best mom.

… … ….

Once at the mall Shelby asked Rachel if she had any store she wanted to go into and the girl could only think of one. She remembered seeing their commercials on TV and thinking that al the girls looked so pretty in the clothes.

"The Gap, mom! Let's go there!" And so that's where the mother daughter duo went first.

Shelby decided to look for a coat and pants there since they had a nice selection. Rachel hated wearing pants and decided to let her mom know.

"I don't need pants." She spoke rather bluntly.

Shelby looked over at Rachel, "Yes you do. It gets really cold in the winter. I'm sure you know that."

"But I've been fine without them."

 _Oh boy._ Shelby thought.

"Well I'm not letting you go out there in the winter without pants Rachel."

"But-"

And that's when Shelby gave her that really scary 'mom' look, complete with eyebrows, a stern lip, and narrowed eyes that dared her to say another word. Rachel quickly and wisely decided to say no more about her crusade against pants.

So instead, the girl slowly slipped away from her mom and started to look at the cute skirts.

She found two pleated ones that she really liked and went to go show Shelby. It was then that she ran into someone accidentally.

"Hey, watch it!" Came the reprimand of a small, but tough voice. Rachel knew that voice. It was Amanda, one of Quinn and Santana's friends.

"S-sorry." Rachel stuttered, feeling tiny next to one of her bullies.

Amanda smirked when she realized who it was. "Wow geek. What ya got there? More lame skirts?"

Rachel hid the skirts behind her back and shrugged. "No."

"Yeah right. I saw them. I didn't even know you shopped here. You dress like a baby anyways."

"Shut up." Rachel told her, clenching her fists.

"Is that all you have to say? Well I'm sure that's all you know how to say 'cause it's probably what your parents tell you all the time since you're so annoying." She bit that last word and wore a satisfied smirk when she saw Rachel's hurt.

"That's-that's not true!" Rache; defended herself.

The bully put a hand on her hip, "Everyone in the whole school thinks you're annoying. Just do us a favor, and shut up."

She gave Rachel a slight push, "See you on Monday, dork."

Rachel watched her walk off and sniffled a bit. Usually she could ignore the comments, but that one was particularly mean.

She heard her mother call her and headed back to where she was supposed to have been.

"Bug, where'd you go?" Shelby asked unaware of the encounter between Amanda. She immediately noticed Rachel's sad look.

"Are you okay?"

Rachel nodded rather unconvincingly. The mother looked over her daughter trying to figure out what happened. She saw the girl holding two skirts, "Do you want those as well?"

Rachel had forgotten that she was holding them, but this time she shook her head, tired of being made fun of, "No."

"Those look really pretty." Shelby tried, "Are you sure? I'll buy them for you, if that's what you want."

"No, I-I wanna put them back."

Shelby took them from her daughter without a fight from Rachel, "Okay. We'll put them back at the end. Let's go into the dressing room and try this stuff on first though."

Before Rachel could do anything else Shelby bent down and gave her a small kiss on her forehead, "Tell me where you're gonna be next time you walk away, okay?"

"Sorry." Rachel said apologetically, realizing her mistake, despite the hurt that was running through her at what Amanda had just said. Her daddies would've had a fit if she'd walked away like that. Although her aunt would probably have not even noticed. All the different style of parenting sometimes confused the girl.

"It's okay." Shelby smiled, "Let's try these clothes on."

But Rachel had been subdued all throughout the rest of the shopping trip, and as they sat at the italian place that Rachel had picked, Shelby was growing worried. No amount of skirts, tights, pants, or shirts could make the girl budge. She was respectful and harbored no attitude, but her happiness wasn't there.

Rachel, for her part, kept running what Amanda had said to her. Leroy used to tell her to be quiet a lot. Her cousins and her aunt would tell her too. Her mom hadn't, but maybe her mom thought it.

"Rachel what happened? Why are you so quiet, sweetheart?"

The little girl's eyes chanced a look at her mother. There was only concern. Her mother's eyes always looked at her lovingly, but what if she was just good at hiding her true feelings? The girl shrunk in her seat, "Nothing."

"I'm sure it's not nothing Rachel." Shelby tried softly.

Her daughter's spirit was completely squandered, and for the life of her, she couldn't figure out why. The rest of their shopping consisted of Rachel nodding along and saying that everything Shelby chose out was just "fine."

Rachel didn't look at her mother any longer. The questions in her mind grew larger and larger. All Rachel wanted was to curl up and cry.

Shelby had wanted to take one more stop and buy the girl some snow boots, but figured that could wait until later. It was obvious that Rachel was ready to be home.

Making a quick decision, Shelby called the waiter over for the check before either of them finished eating. Rachel looked at her mom curiously.

"Does home sound like a good plan, love?"

Her mom's nickname for her made the little girl melt. She nodded quickly and pushed her food away, "I'm not that hungry. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. We'll take it to go."

Shelby held the three bags of clothes in one hand, and when Rachel stood up took the girl's free hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. She might not have known what her daughter was feeling, but she wanted to let Rachel know that she was there for her, regardless.

The ride had been quiet and Rachel was lost in her thoughts. So lost, that she missed all the glances her mother was giving her through the rearview. Shelby for her part, was trying to figure out how to navigate this. She'd never seen Rachel so down, and it had her at a new level of worry, sadness, and frustration.

When they got home, Rachel was surprised when her mom ignored the bags in the back and instead opened her door. Rachel curiously looked up at Shelby who had a rather determined look on her face.

"Come on lovey." Shelby cooed softly. She placed her hands under Rachel's arms and easily picked her up. She held Rachel, with one hand on her back, and her other arm under her daughter's bottom.

"You and I need to talk honey." Shelby spoke gently, as she walked into the home with the girl in her arms.

Despite her confusion, Rachel clung to her mother. It astounded the girl how her mom could read her need for comfort so well.

She felt her mother place her on the recliner. Shelby sat in front of her on the coffee table and looked at her tiny daughter.

"Sweetie, what happened? I just want to help you."

Rachel wanted to disappear. Her mother was looking at her with such soft eyes, and had just carried her like she used to believe could only happen in her dreams. Her dream mother. Her real mother. She was right in front of her.

The girl brought her knees up and hid her face in her arms.

"You don't want to tell me?"

A shake of the head.

Shelby felt her a pinch of hurt. Why couldn't her daughter talk to her?

"My love," Shelby leaned forward, "You can trust me. I can help make it better."

Rachel took a deep breath and lifted her head. "What if you can't make it better?"

God, that question really killed Shelby. Her daughter was getting to that age when mommy swooping in couldn't fix everything. And Shelby never really got a chance to have Rachel when swooping in was always the answer. And that was probably the most awful part.

"Well I can try, Rachel." She answered honestly.

The 11 year old seemed to like that honest answer, so she decided to give her mom a try. She snuggled her chin onto her knees and blinked a bit as she stared down before looking up.

"W-Why don't you tell me to be quiet?"

It was Shelby's turn to be caught off guard, "What do you mean?"

The girl took a deep breath, "Well sometimes I talk when I shouldn't, or I say dumb things and I can be really annoying and ask a lot of questions. Lindsay says I act like a know it all sometimes too. So why don't you tell me to be quiet like everyone else?"

Shelby wasn't sure how the hell this question even came about, but if it was what's plaguing her daughter then she would answer, and she'd attempt to ease her insecurities, "Rachel, I don't because what you say matters to me. I want you to speak your mind honey. I love to hear what you have to say."

Did Shelby really mean all of that? Rachel's eyes fixated on her mom as she wiggled her toes and tried to understand the emotions swirling inside of her.

"Where is all of this coming from?" Shelby asked sincerely.

The girl still didn't have the guts to admit to her mom that she was being bullied. Her mom knew that she wasn't exactly popular, but she didn't need to know the extent to which some of the girls at school liked to pick on her.

"I-" She pause, "Everyone thinks I'm annoying. I don't want you to think that either."

"I could never think that about you. I love you to the moon and back. Your opinion, your thoughts, they all matter and are very important to me."

Rachel lifted her head a little from her knees, "Y-you're sure?"

Shelby moved from the coffee table and sat on the recliner's arm rest. She put an arm around her daughter, "Yes, I'm positive." The mother stroked Rachel's hair, "Baby girl, what happened that is making you think that I don't want to hear what you have to say?"

"It doesn't matter." Rachel told her mother. Her eyes finally being able to make more than a half a second of eye contact with Shelby.

"Yes it does." Shelby told her more firmly.

"No, mom."

Shelby sighed, "Rachel-"

"I don't wanna talk about it anymore!" She burst out in anger.

The outburst took Shelby back, and made Rachel's eyes widen, knowing she'd made a mistake and immediately regretting it. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scream-"

Shelby raised a hand, making Rachel stop her apology in its tracks. She watched her mother closely, half waiting for the screaming and insults to begin.

But they never came.

Shelby took a deep breath then looked at Rachel, "Can you just believe me then?"

Of course she didn't necessarily like being talked to by her child in that manner, but that wasn't her biggest concern. At that moment, she just wanted Rachel to digest what she was saying.

"I want you to really believe that I care about what you have to say."

Rachel considered her mother for a moment. She was just so different from the rest of the adults in her life.

"Okay." She finally said.

Shelby gave her a small smile. It would take time for Rachel to really grasp it, the mother knew. But they had all the time in the world.

"Okay?" Shelby asked once more to be sure.

Rachel smiled a little back. "Yeah, okay."

"Hmmm." Shelby tapped her chin dramatically. Rachel wasn't sure what her mom was up to. Not until Shelby pounced and started tickling her! It sent Rachel into a fit of giggles, eventually moving into a fit of laughter.

"Mom, stop, stop!" Rachel managed to get out through her laughing.

By the end of it they were both atop the recliner, Rachel kicking her legs to get away from her mother.

"I hafta pee! I surrender!" She said much more jovial than she was moments before.

Shelby finally stopped her unforgiving attack of tickles and let her arms fall gently around her daughter. "Alright, I'll stop before you have an accident." She added a small wink.

Rachel looked up at her mom from where she had her head laid on the woman's chest and smiled before jumping off her mother and running to the restroom. Shelby watched her go and laid her head back onto the chair with a deep sigh.

She wasn't sure what exactly had happened, or even if she'd handled that well. Should she have pushed the girl to tell her what got her upset? Should she have scolded her for the way she yelled?

But at least the girl seemed okay now. She'd need to call her sister and talk this out with her, but for now she'd enjoy the rest of the afternoon with her daughter.

When Rachel came back, they both went back to the car to grab Rachel's things, and went up to her room to put the clothes away. Rachel was folding some of the new underwear and pants her mom had bought her, while Shelby was hanging up her shirts and two new peacoats. Rachel loved the peacoats. One was a deep burgundy, and the other was navy blue.

"Mom." Rachel called from her bed.

Shelby stepped out with a hanger and one pea coat in hand, "Yeah, hon?"

"I really do like the clothes you bought me." Rachel blushed, "I didn't exactly show it at the mall."

Shelby gave her daughter a deep, loving look, "I know sweetie. I get that you were having a tough time dealing with your thoughts."

The woman hung the coat then leaned on the closet door's frame and waited her daughter to speak again. The girl was playing with the socks in her hand.

"I've never really been shopping for clothes before. My dads used to just buy me stuff, and I'd stay home. I think I remember going to the mall with them like three times."

Shelby's heart ached every time her child talked about her dads. She walked over and sat with her, grabbing the last pair of pants that needed to be folded. "Well I loved shopping with you today. And I'm sure we're going to get lots of chances to do it."

Rachel smirked a little, "Does that mean I'm gonna have like a million outfits at the end of all the shopping we do?"

Shelby laughed, "Yeah and a million pair of shoes too." She joked with a wink, "How does that sound?"

"Like a dream come true!" Rachel announced causing her mom to throw a pair of socks at her, which she stealthily dodged.

Shelby patted the folded clothes"Alright, put these away in your drawer, then you and I can go for ice cream, or stay here and watch a movie."

"Can we stay here?" Rachel asked a little more shyly.

"Of course. We'll watch a movie then."

The mother was about to get up when Rachel stopped her again. "Wait, mom?"

Shelby loved hearing 'mom' come out of her little girl's mouth. The girl waited until her mother stopped and sat back down.

She darted her eyes up, "I know I shouldn't have left to see the skirts and not told you. My dads would've locked me in my room the rest of the day if I did that to them."

"Let's not do it again, okay?" Shelby placed her larger hand over Rachel's delicate fingers, "And you know I wouldn't do that, right? Lock you in your room. Maybe I'll send you upstairs to stew for a bit but never for an entire day."

The girl took a deep breath. She tried to gather her thoughts. By now, Rachel knew that her mother's silence meant she was waiting for her to say something.

She started to play with her mom's hand. It was so soft and her nails were painted a nice deep red.

"I-I know you won't do that. I just, I guess it's weird 'cause all of you treat me so differently."

Shelby took in her daughter's words, "Does that confuse you sometimes?"

The girl shrugged, "I guess so." Her mom's earnest tone made her feel comfortable and safe to speak her mind, "I don't know what the rules are sometimes and how you'll react. My dads would yell at me a lot and leave me alone and ignore me for days. My aunt, well she just yells a lot and sometimes she'd put me in timeout. And with you, we talk a lot, and you've only put me in time out once. But you've all done it for different reasons and I really don't-don't know when I'll be in trouble and when I won't be."

And Shelby couldn't deny her any of that. It was all true. She realized then that they never really set ground rules and imagined that Rachel must've felt as if she's had to walk on eggshells the past weeks trying to navigate her new home and expectations.

"Oh sweetheart, that's my fault. I should be more clear about what I expect out of you. What if you and I both come up with some rules and expectations for our home?"

Rachel's eyes darted towards her mother. Wait. What? She actually had a say in all of this?

"You want me to help?"

Shelby stood up and held out her hand, "Yeah, silly! This is your house now, and what you say matters, remember?"

Rachel took her mom's hand, "Where are we going?"

"Let's go into the kitchen and figure out these rules together."

And for some reason, despite the fact that they were going to write out RULES, Rachel was content to do so. Her mom was including her, her mom was holding her hand.

Five minutes later there was a piece of notebook paper in front of the both of them. Rachel also had a bowl of strawberries and water near her, courtesy of her mom.

"Do you wanna write the first one?" Shelby gave her the pen with the fine point, inky tip. Her dads always had pens like that, but was never allowed to touch them for some reason. It was cool to be able to use one.

"Mmmm," Rachel thought for a moment, "What about No Cursing?"

Her mother gave her a nice smile and a nod, "I like that one."

Shelby watched her daughter write. It was cute to see Rachel's tongue stick out as she wrote it down neatly onto the paper. The mother loved to watch and discover her daughter's idiosyncrasies, like the way she liked to sleep on her tummy with her fist near her mouth, or the way she smelled everything before tasting it.

She handed the pen to her mom, "Your turn."

"Okay, what about bedtime is at 9:30 during the week and 10:30 on the weekends?"

Rachel glared at her mother, "I don't really think I need a bedtime though."

"Oh?" Shelby was far too amused to put a stop to it. She'd like to hear her future lawyer's line of reasoning.

Rachel seemed confident. "I'm never tired when I go to bed, and so it's not fair to make me go to sleep so early."

"It's scientifically proven that kids need at least 8 hours of sleep." Shelby spoke, not missing a beat, "And the two times you stayed up past ten, you were a grump to get up in the morning, remember?"

Damn. Rachel bit her lip trying to think of a retort, "Well, well sometimes science is wrong. They used to think the earth was flat. Clearly, wrong."

Shelby couldn't help the chuckle that escaped her lips, "Right, but unfortunately for you, there is plenty evidence to prove this one. Like, you know, you being cranky in the mornings."

Rachel crossed her arms across her chest, "Fiiiinnnneee." She groaned, letting her mother write the second rule down.

"Okay, your turn. Do you have something?" Shelby asked after writing the rule.

"Mmmm." Rachel thought back to some of the rules she had with her dad and her aunt.

"No going into your room at night 'cause you're sleeping, and ask for permission to go in during the day." She determined rather matter of factly. She grabbed the pen and was about to write it down when her mom's hand stopped her.

"Whoah. Whoah. Wait, let's talk about that one."

Rachel looked up, eyes innocent and confused.

"You're allowed in my room Rachel." Her voice soft and gentle.

It was then that Shelby realized the girl had yet to even step foot in her room since she took a shower in there on the first day. God, why hadn't she noticed that before? It's like so many things just went over her head.

 _Am I a bad mother?_

She shook off the thought for now.

"You can come in whenever you want, unless I say otherwise. And you can definitely come in at night if you're scared or want to sleep with me."

Rachel looked away and stared at her hand that held the pretty pen. She was embarrassed that she thought it was forbidden to enter her mom's room. Of course she was allowed. Her mom was a nice, attentive parent.

"Oh. Yeah, okay." She mumbled.

Shelby gently moved her daughter's chin so they could face each other, "Is that why you haven't come into my room sweetheart? You thought you weren't allowed?"

The girl only shrugged. Shelby sighed and stroked her daughter's cheek, "Well once we're finished here then you and I are going to watch a movie in there."

It brought a small smile and a nod from her daughter. There was so much they still had to learn about one another, but both seemed happy to take that ride together.

Soon enough they had laid out some fair rules, and Shelby had explained consequences to the girl. Rachel wasn't too happy to learn that Shelby was not against spankings. Although it was made explicitly clear that they would only be used in rare circumstances. Everything else she'd expected, timeouts (which she hated), getting stuff taken away, and groundings. But at the end of it, Rachel was grateful to have everything spelled out for her.

Her mom placed the rules on the bulletin board near the refrigerator. A place where they could both see it.

"So what movie do you want to watch, Rach?"

"Can we watch Mulan?" Her eyes widened in excitement.

Shelby chuckled. "Yeah sure! Let's go."

The mother sat amused and in love as she listened and watched her daughter sing along to the songs in Mulan.

It was at the song "Reflection" that Shelby became enthralled by the little girl's vocal ability. Sure, she was rough around the edges, but her talent was raw.

Shelby couldn't have been prouder as she sat resting on her bed's headboard, while Rachel was perched on the backs of her legs towards the end of the bed, intently singing along to the Disney movie.

It was a weird sort of pride. She wasn't on a stage. The New Directions didn't just give a phenomenal rendition. There were no spectators, or applause, or awards. The sort of things that usually fueled Shelby.

Instead, there was an 11 year old in small white tights, a schoolgirl skirt, and Winnie the Pooh undies that kept peeking through as she moved and swayed to the song. She was a brunette little girl with wide brown eyes, an adorable pout, and a beautiful voice. It was a dimly lit room, with no one but her and Rachel that made her feel the most pride she ever had.

"Isn't that the best song ever!" Rachel squealed right at the end of the song, pausing the movie while doing so. She brought Shelby out of her thoughts.

"It's a wonderful song." Shelby smiled, "But you were the star. That was beautiful Rach. Your voice is amazing."

The girl rolled her eyes, "I know, you've told me before!"

"Yes, but I haven't heard you sing like that though. Your voice has a lot of range."

"Does that mean I get to be in your Glee club when I'm in high school?" Her voice raised an octave and her chocolate eyes glistened up at her mom.

Putty. Shelby was putty. "You'd have to audition." She told her, "but I don't doubt it for a second."

Rachel clapped her hands and jumped on the backs of her heels in excitement, "I can't wait to be in high school!"

The mother beckoned her with a chuckle, and Rachel happily crawled over, falling right into her mother's side and hugging Shelby's middle tight, the remote control still in her hand.

"I wanna sing just like you."

"You already do kiddo."

Rachel blushed and drew her legs in to be closer to the woman.

Shelby looked down at her fondly, "My little cuddle bug."

Rachel blushed a little at her own clinginess, but melted in her mom's warmth. She loved being so close. She loved her mom's bed too. It smelled like Shelby's clothes. It was like being wrapped in a mom hug all the time.

The girl pressed play again and watched from Shelby's embrace this time. She was too comfortable and her mom's hand was under her shirt, rubbing her belly just the way she liked it.

Meanwhile Shelby kept looking down at her daughter. The fact that in two years Rachel would be a teenager kept running through her mind.

When Rachel's in high school would she actually be as excited to share a school with her mom? Would Rachel still be the little lovebug that she was now?

 _Enjoy your daughter as she is now._ Her older sister's words came to her. _Sometimes I miss my little tomboy being 5 years old and only wanting to be in mommy's arms, but then I watch her playing and she looks so carefree and beautiful and I realize I love where she is now._

Words to live by, Shelby realized.

And so Shelby did exactly that. She snuggled down and hugged her daughter. Time flies and spending it worrying wouldn't help her. Taking in every moment is what mattered.

... ... ...

The weekend flew by for the pair. By Monday, the incident at the mall was forgotten and Rachel seemed back to her complete normal self once more.

Shelby stopped in front of the middle school and looked over at her daughter in the backseat. She smiled and waited for her to unbuckle her seatbelt and grab her backpack. Rachel leaned over and hugged her mom who kissed her on the cheek.

"I have practice today, so you're going to be staying a little longer with your aunt, okay?" Shelby reminded her.

Because the high school let out later and Shelby usually stayed an hour later most days and much later on practice days, Rachel was still being picked up from school by her aunt, whom she stayed with until Shelby picked her up. It was a nice system because Rachel still got to spend time with her cousins and aunt and uncle.

"Yeah, okay." She replied, "I love you mom." Rachel added, loving the way it sounded and smiling brightly because of it.

And she didn't know that every time she uttered those words with her young voice, and smiling face, it made the top notch teacher and vocal coach's heart flutter, "I love you too baby girl." Shelby managed to say despite the emotion bubbling inside her, stifling the feeling of wanting to cover the girl in mom kisses.

 _Get it together Shelby._ She told herself.

How was it that she was the most feared and respected coach and teacher, but absolutely lost all reason in the hands of her 11 year old if she wasn't careful?

 _GET. IT. TOGETHER._

She waited until Rachel was inside the school to put her sunglasses back on and drive off to work.

…. …. ….

The Rachel that Shelby knew and loved though, wasn't as loved in school. And each time Rachel entered her school she hated crossing the hall where her bullies loved to wait around. Thankfully Kurt got to school before her today and was waiting for her by the entrance.

Solidarity in numbers. Two losers is safer than one. That's what Kurt always said anyway.

"Good morning Rachel, ready to evade our wondrous bullies?" He asked wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"I think I've mentally prepared myself enough." She joked along in their misery walk. And just like clockwork the first insult came from Amanda's little clique.

"Hey losers!" It came with a nice shove to Kurt making Rachel also lose her balance and stumble a bit.

"Back off Santana!" Kurt shouted back at the tall, olive skinned sixth grader who'd pushed him. He grabbed a hold of Rachel quickly so she wouldn't fall.

The Latina smirked at them, but Quinn who also hung out with them stayed quiet, yet gave Rachel an almost indistinguishable frown of empathy. See Quinn would never defend her, but would be kind to her during their choir period. Rachel, even as young as she was knew that Quinn was embarrassed to actually like someone like her, a dork, nerd, loser. But the 11 year old couldn't help but like the person Quinn was during choir. She just wished she was the same outside of it.

Rachel saw Amanda laugh and give them both the finger as they walked past them. "See you at lunch, dorks." Amanda spit as the two walked off.

The first four periods went by like normal for Rachel, and by the time lunch came Rachel was pretty hungry. She'd also gotten a text from her mom the period before lunch but waited to respond until class was over because her mom somehow knew her schedule and explained to Rachel when she gave her the phone that absolutely not texting could be done during class.

But after class she opened up her phone and read the text again.

"Hope you're having a good day bug. My practice might go longer than usual. I'll pick you up by 7 pm though!"

Rachel frowned at the fact that she'd have less time with her mom tonight. Her bedtime on weekdays was 9:30, and by the time she was showered and in pajamas it'd probably be 8:00 pm. But then Rachel had a thought.

Maybe her mom could read to her again?

Shelby had done that a few days ago when she came into Rachel's room to tell her it was time for bed. She found the girl in her pajamas, a tank top that Shelby had bought her that had a Mulan silhouette with the words "Fight like a Girl" written on it and plaid pajama bottoms. She was snuggled into her blankets, but was trying so hard to finish the last few pages of her book.

" _It's too good. I need to finish it." The girl told an amused Shelby._

" _You're falling asleep buddy."_

" _But I have momentum." Came her tired whine._

 _Shelby laughed and walked over, "How 'bout I read the rest of it to you? And you just listen and relax."_

 _Rachel watched her mother sit down and she readily gave Shelby her book. Soon her mother's soft voice lulled her to sleep. She still had to finish that book because she probably fell asleep three pages in, but having it read by her mom while leaning into her side was such a safe and secure feeling._

Too bad she was too embarrassed to ask for Shelby to do it again, so she sent Shelby an "Okay, mom."

But once she closed her lockers she looked at her phone again. Texting the questions would be easier than asking in person, right?

Hmmmm…

She unlocked the white Iphone 5C her mom had given her last week and quickly typed out her ask.

'Can you read to me tonight?' She finally texted.

Unfortunately one of the eighth graders missed the short girl and pushed her out of the way causing her to drop her phone. The device slid and landed right by Santana's shoe.

The Latina picked it up and looked at Rachel, whose face blanched. The girl couldn't help herself and read the last thing Rachel had sent her mom.

"Give me my phone Santana." Rachel urged and held out her hand demandingly.

"Awww, your mommy still reads you bedtime stories?" She mocked the much shorter 11 year old. Even though Santana herself had her own bedtime ritual with her mami which involved an old Spanish lullaby and rhythmic pats to her bottom, that could put the feisty girl to sleep in moments. But that was something she'd never admit out loud.

Rachel couldn't help but blush at Santana's jab, but she kept her head held high. Santana didn't know her story. Rachel was just the girl that had come from New York last year. She was just a weirdo. She didn't know how unloved Rachel had felt until recently, how abandoned, and pushed to the side. Nobody knew at school. Except maybe for Kurt.

"My mother and I like to spend time together. Yes. What's the big deal? Gimme my phone!"

Rachel went to grab it but Santana held it above her head.

"Or what?" The phone buzzed and Santana brought it closer to her but still out of reach from Rachel, "Oh look your mommy texted back! She said" And Santana squinted her eyes to see it better. The taller girl began to read aloud" ' _Of course bug. I'll read anything you'd like tonight. Be good for your aunt and I'll be there to pick you up as soon as I can._ '"

Rachel burned red while Santana laughed, "Here's your phone _bug._ Remember to be good for your aunty or your mommy will have to put you in a corner."

The girl snatched her phone and thought about shoving Santana but decided against it because Santana wasn't scared of hitting back, and Rachel remembered one of the rules she and her mom wrote down, 'No fighting.'

She wasn't trying to get punished.

"Go back with your arrogant friends. Don't you have anything better to do than pick on others?" Rachel sassed tightening her hold on her backpack.

"Nope!" Santana laughed.

The smaller sixth grader felt herself shake with anger, "Well-well" She sputtered, "Invest your energy in better things or else you'll be stuck bagging my groceries when we're older!" Rachel shot at her and walked away quickly not wanting to show Santana how embarrassed and hurt she was.

"What the hell does invest mean?" Santana said through a laugh watching Rachel walk away.

Rachel ignored her, pocketed her phone and walked towards the cafeteria. By the time she sat down with Kurt towards the back of the cafeteria with her food she felt a little less angry but the embarrassment was still there. God, why had her mom decided to text her just then? She knew Shelby was probably expecting some form of a text back, but she really didn't feel like doing so at the moment.

"What happened?" Kurt immediately asked, sensing that Rachel was off.

"Santana happened." She muttered resting her chin on her hand and looking glumly at her food, "She read an embarrassing text I sent my mom and then my mom decided to be all lovey dovey when she texted back and she read that too."

Kurt frowned, "What'd you ask your mom?"

"Well I don't wanna tell you!" Rachel answered shocked.

Kurt raised his hands in innocence, "Alright. Alright. It was worth a shot. Wait, do you think she'll tell Amanda and Quinn? You know Amanda would love to have that over your head."

Rachel froze, "I-no, do you think she will?"

Shit. And then she had also said a few choice things to the Latina afterwards.

"Oh no. Everyone's gonna laugh at me."

Kurt gave her friend a sad smile, "Well they're not looking over at us now. Maybe she won't?"

Rachel just hid her face in hands, "I hate school." She groaned.

"Amen, sister."

Truthfully though, Santana was not planning on telling her friends. She wanted to poke fun at Rachel, because that's what popular girls did and it was funny to get a rise out of the runt of the sixth grade class, but she didn't want to put her through much else. She was no fool and knew Amanda had it in for Rachel since the girl had joined them at school.

Besides, all jokes aside, Santana couldn't really make too much fun of the girl because her mom wasn't too far different from Rachel's from what those texts gave her insight into.

"But honestly, I still can't believe that Ms. Corcoran, THEE New Directions coach is your mom Rachel!" Kurt tried to lift the girl's mood a bit.

Kurt had been the only one that really knew about Rachel's personal life, and Rachel his own.

"She is really cool, I guess." Rachel sighed, having to agree with Kurt. "You know she told me that I'm a shoe in for Glee when I'm in high school."

Kurt's eyes brightened, "You have to let her hear me sing!" He urged, "My range is just as good as yours."

Rachel definitely thought she was a better singer, but decided not to get into that argument, "I'll ask her if you can come over." She said with a shrug and took a bite of her pizza.

"Hey Rach. Hey pansy." Came a young, but tough looking 11 year old. His hair in a faux hawk that annoyed the heavens out of Rachel.

The girl narrowed his eyes at him, "Kurt is not a pansy Noah, and leave us alone."

He say next to them anyways, "Aww, come on! You two are my favorite."

"To bug and annoy." Kurt spit.

Noah Puckerman shrugged, "I can't hang with my two favorite choir geeks? You know the more time I spend sitting here means less time you'll have with all the people who like to mess with you guys. I'm like a shield."

"You mean your friends?" Rachel scoffed, "They're the ones that are mean to Kurt and me. If you really wanted to be a shield you'd tell them to stop."

"Hey, it's not my fault you guys are weird."

"We're not weird!" Rachel argued.

The boy rolled his eyes, "Rach, you dress like your three years old, always say weirdo stuff that no one understands, and you talk back to Amanda. Kurt, you dress like a colorful old man. Yeah, you guys are weird."

"So why do you associate yourself with us?" Kurt bit out after taking a drink of his milk.

" 'Cause Rachel's my Jewish soulmate."

"I'm not Jewish!"

While Puck and Rachel argued the possibility of her Jewish ancestry, Quinn, Santana, and Amanda were sitting far off when Santana noticed Amanda looking in Rachel and Kurt's table.

"Why does Puck even talk to them?" She scoffed, clearly annoyed.

"Because he can do what he wants." Quinn replied lackadaisically. She didn't even know why she hung out with Amanda. Santana was cool. They were basically best friends in fact. But Amanda always got on Quinn's nerves. But she was part of the cool group and it's not like Quinn could just excommunicate her.

"Well duh Quinn." Amanda shot her a look, "I'm just asking why he wants to."

"You're just jealous 'cause you liiiikkkeee him." Santana teased.

"I do not!"

Quinn joined the teasing, "Then why get so mad?" Her eyebrows wiggled.

Amanda pushed up from the chair, ignoring her friends and stalking over to the table.

"Oh shit." Kurt hunched in his chair, "Here she comes."

Rachel looked away from the rant she was subjecting Noah to, regarding the reasons he was disgusting and needed to leave her alone with his unhygienic self, which Puck just found amusing and smiled the whole time. There was Amanda heading towards them.

"Hey Puck." She said, giving Rachel a death glare.

The faux hawked boy gave her a small smirk, "Hey Amanda, 'sup?"

"Nothing, just wondering if you were coming to my birthday party on Saturday."

Rachel shuffled her feet and pretended not to care that she was yet to ever be invited to any sort of birthday party by anyone. She only knew what parties looked like because of TV.

"Gotta check if my mom's not working, 'cause I might have to watch my little sister." He turned to Rachel, "You coming?"

Amanda answered before Rachel could even react, "She's not invited. But I hope you can come. It'll be a lot of fun. My dad rented a DJ for it and everything."

She gave Kurt and Rachel one last scowl before making her way back to her friends.

Puck stood up and stole two fries from Kurt that earned him an undignified "Hey!"

"Gotta go. I have lunch detention with Mr. Stephens, and I've already missed half of it. Always nice talking to you Rach." He said half jokingly, then turned to Kurt, "See ya pansy."

Kurt and Rachel just looked at each other and sighed in unison. Middle school sucked.

The rest of the school day consisted of Rachel thinking about the day and the embarrassment she went through with Santana. It was midway through her fifth period that she realized she never texted her mom back. A momentary panic struck her and she sneakily got out her phone. Her mom hadn't texted back asking why she hadn't responded.

' _She probably isn't mad. She's not your dads.'_

She stared at her phone a little longer, dazing out in the process until her teacher's words brought her back.

"Ms. Rachel, is there something far more interesting on your phone that you've lost focus?"

Rachel eye's darted up, "Umm n-no. Sorry."

But Mr. Evans shook his head, "You know the rules. Zero tolerance on phones. Hand it over."

"But I wasn't using it." Rachel argued.

Some of the kids in the class rolled their eyes. Rachel could have such a big mouth sometimes. Especially whenever it involved her thinking she was right about something.

"The rule doesn't involve you using it. It involves you having it out."

The 11 year old, having been frustrated throughout the whole day felt her emotions come to the fore. She scrunched her fists up.

"Hand it over Rachel. Come on." Mr. Evans walked up to her and put a hand on her desk.

"It's my phone and I wasn't doing anything. And you can't make me. You're not the dictator of this classroom." The girl challenged him.

"Either hand it over or wait in the principal's office." It was more of an idle threat on the teacher's part, but he needed to say something for the girl to hand it over. He was willing to overlook the attitude.

"Anything is better than your dumb, boring lecture." The girl mumbled, more to herself, but everyone had heard it and that really set Mr. Evans off. He pointed to the door, "Get out, and go to the principal's office right now Rachel."

Rachel didn't move, but the sudden "NOW!" that Mr. Evans barked finally got her moving.

Well shit. Now what?

… …. ….

"My mom's at work, you can't call her!" Rachel pleaded with the school secretary. She was sat in the office, currently waiting for her doom.

"Who normally picks you up from school?" The secretary asked the skittish girl.

Rachel fumbled with her hands, "M-my aunt."

"Then I'm calling her and letting her know to pick up your phone in the office and that you'll have after school detention."

Rachel just shrunk in her seat and stared at the speckled carpeted floor.

The woman put the phone to her ear and watch the sixth grader from the corner of her eye, "Hi, yes, this is Ms. Landry the Poe Middle School secretary."

The girl cringed and tried to gauge her aunt's reaction. From the sound of it her aunt was putting on that calm, but surprised tone.

"Yes, well it happens from time to time." The secretary spoke, "Kids at this age have their emotions up and down. But she'll be available for pick up an hour after normal dismissal time at which point her phone can also be picked up."

The secretary hung up and looked over, "You'll stay here until your next class. I will still be calling your mother as it's protocol."

"But-"

"If she doesn't pick up I will leave a message." The secretary added.

Rachel sighed. Her mom was going to be so mad at her. The only sight of luck she had was the fact that her mom didn't pick up the phone and so the secretary only left a short message.

Her detention had been served with a bunch of other kids that Rachel deemed "hoodlums," but didn't dare say out loud. Once they were all released the girl walked slowly out only to freeze when she saw her aunt waiting with her arms crossed at the end of the hall. "Let's go Rachel Barbara. You've already wasted enough time."

The girl swallowed hard and quickened her pace to her aunt. The woman grabbed the girl's upper arm once in reach and led her to the office to pick up the phone.

The walk to the car was brisk. Her aunt's fast pace made Rachel run to catch up at times.

"What were you thinking Rachel?" Her aunt asked the moment they got into the car. "You've never gotten into trouble into school like that, or talked to your teachers in that way."

Rachel bit the inside of her cheek, "Do you know if my mom is mad?"

The high school had let out by now and Rachel wondered if Shelby had called her aunt before her practice.

"Is that an answer to my question?" Carrie snapped.

"No ma'am." Rachel hung her head, "Nothing's wrong. He just made me mad."

"You couldn't have given him your phone when he asked? What were you looking at anyway?"

God! Why was everyone on her damn case today?!

"Why does it matter?" Rachel snapped, irritated.

Carrie recognized the inklings of Rachel's attitude. "You better watch it Rachel."

The girl huffed and leaned back into the chair. "Is my mom mad at me?" She asked again.

Carrie eyed the girl for a second before looking back at the road. Shelby had called her the moment she had heard the voicemail after her sixth period. She seemed both surprised and upset.

"Yes." Was all Carried said. Was Shelby angry at Rachel? Maybe not exactly, but Carrie thought a little fear would be good for the girl. She had a tantrum at school and Carrie was not happy about it.

When Rachel heard her fear confirmed her eyes instantly watered. Her mother hadn't been mad at her yet. This was new, and...and scary. Images of her father's yelling at her, Carrie telling her to shut up, transformed into her mother yelling and shoving her into her room, telling her to shut up and not make a noise for the rest of the day.

 _'You bad little girl!" Leroy once yelled at her a week before she left to Ohio, "After everything your dad and I do for you, all you can do is misbehave?! I don't want to see your face, or hear you. Understand?! Get upstairs! NOW!"_

 _Rachel's brown eyes began to fill and her ears burned with shame. She saw Hiram's stern but distant face behind Leroy's._

 _Leroy then forcefully grabbed her shirt and pulled her out of the kitchen, "UPSTAIRS!"_

 _She had gotten sidetracked from walking home from school that day and decided to look into a music store that she passed on her walk home. Worse idea of her life._

Her mind raced and the rest of the ride to her aunt's was a blur. The car came to a stop and Rachel looked up at her aunt, "Get upstairs to Lindsay's room. I'll come get you later."

And so Rachel sat in silence in her cousin's room. Both Lindsay and Ron were at friends' houses, and her uncle at work. She shuffled her feet and played with her hands. Her mind was betraying her and coming up with all the different ways that her mother could react.

"Stupid Santana and Amanda." Rachel grumbled. "Stupid Mr. Evans."

The taunting was extra today and that just made her far more wound up, which is why she exploded in the first place! This wasn't her fault!

The girl hadn't realized it, but she ended up asleep on her cousin's bed. She had shrugged off her coat and covered herself with it, while she shoes were left on the floor by the bed.

This was the scene that Shelby had walked into.

All the mother wanted to do was talk to her child and understand what was going on in her head. She already had heard an earful from Carrie once she got to the front door.

The woman telling her that she needed to better control the girl, and not let her get away with so much or else her temper would get the best of her as it already had.

" _She is not getting away with a lot Carrie." Shelby said though her teeth. She was already tired from practice and now she was getting ambushed._

" _Oh?" Carrie scoffed. "She seems to have way too many opinions lately."_

" _And what's wrong with her having opinions?" Shelby narrowed her eyes, Carrie doing the same. The two woman sizing each other up._

" _She, not once got into any trouble at school while under my care or her fathers'. What's changed?" She put her finger on her chin in fake thought, "That's right. You. You were the change."_

 _Shelby was not going to be nasty. As much as she wanted to be. She would not be nasty. "Carrie, it's late. I'm not going to have an argument with you about this. Thank you for picking her up after detention and thank you for keeping her so long. But my daughter, and her opinions, as you put it, I will not try to change."_

 _Shelby was aware that her daughter was outspoken naturally. Her family had tried to quelch it before, but Shelby loved her daughter's willful spirit, and they'd just have to get used to it. Would she have to teach Rachel self-control and how and when to say things? Sure. And Shelby was up for that._

" _She and I will talk about what happened and she'll have consequences but I'm warning you that I will not change my parenting. If that bothers you please let me know and I will find other arrangements for child care."_

 _Carrie felt her eyes burn with fire. "That is my niece!" She hissed, "You cannot stop us from seeing her."_

 _Shelby remained calm, "I never said that. I would never do that. But if you are growing tired of her, then I don't want it to be a matter of forcing you to pick her up on a daily basis. It wouldn't be healthy for my Rachel, or for you."_

 _The level headedness of the woman irked Cassie._

" _She's in Lindsay's room currently. Go ahead and grab her." Cassie spit turning into the kitchen, now angry with the woman._

 _Shelby took a deep breath. Could this day be over?_

Shelby gave a long sigh and walked over towards her sleeping child's form. She saw the shoes on the floor and bent down to pick them up, then moved the girl's peacoat to the side.

"Rach?"

She shook her daughter's shoulder a bit, "Rachel, it's time to go home."

"Mmm." Rachel mumbled opening her eyes. Her vision adjusted and she saw her mom leaning over her.

The girl sat up a few seconds later and looked away from her mother's gaze.

"Let's go home?" Shelby asked softly.

The girl nodded and took the shoes that her mother was offering her.

It was clear to Shelby that Rachel was avoiding looking at her. She let her be for the moment because all she wanted was to get them home.

"Put your coat on, it's colder out."

Again, Rachel did as she was told but said nothing, only glancing her mom's way then quickly looking away.

Shelby laid a gentle hand on Rachel's back, "I want you to apologize to your aunt Carrie for the attitude in the car." Her words were stern, but gentle, "Then we can go home."

"Yes ma'am." Rachel finally spoke aloud.

The 11 year old said her apologies and received a "Just don't do it again, Rachel. You know better." from her aunt along with a quick hug. Carrie had since calmed down and Shelby wanted to smirk that it seemed Carrie had a very similar temper to her niece.

Shelby watched her daughter from the rear view mirror on their drive home. She looked rather nervous. The quiet in the car was unusual to Shelby as the girl usually rambled on about nothing and anything.

 _Should I calm her down? Should I wait it out?_

The woman let out a breath at a red light and decided on turning on the radio to a station that Rachel liked. She needed time to figure out how to approach this anyway, and Rachel looked lost in the motion of starting out the window.

The mother understood that getting in trouble at school was bound to happen. Kids have good days and bad days. She was not expecting to make this into a huge deal, but it seemed like Rachel and Carrie were really taking this hard and the mother wanted to understand what was going through her little girl's head.

Rachel, for her part, was happy for the silence. She would much rather pretend like nothing happened. And she knew silence. Especially at her dad's house. She could deal with silence.

Shelby shut off the car once in the driveway and turned to her child, who was unbuckling her seatbelt, "I want to talk about what happened, okay? So why don't you go ahead and get ready for bed, then meet me downstairs in the kitchen."

Rachel was confused. Her aunt Carrie had said Shelby was angry at her, but she didn't really look it. Maybe Shelby was saving the disappointment and frustration for their talk. What if she said she was ashamed of her? Oh no. Rachel felt herself get emotional so she quickly nodded and got out the car to regain control.

The woman prepared herself a cup of coffee because once she put Rachel to sleep she had a long night of grading ahead of her. This day just needed to end. She placed a cup of water where she wanted Rachel to sit along with tomato soup and grilled cheese. One of her daughter's favorites.

Eventually the girl came down. She saw the food and smiled a bit. Sometimes she went without eating with her dads when she got in trouble before dinner. It was nice to know that her mom wouldn't deny her food.

Shelby looked up from some of the essays she was reading when she heard the pitter patter of bare feet on her wood floors. Her adorable daughter was once again wearing her Mulan tank top and purple cotton sleep shorts.

"I made you a light dinner." Shelby smiled, "Go ahead and eat first."

"Thank you." Rachel said simply still keeping quiet. Shelby wished her daughter would speak to her. This was so weird. Rachel was not shy like this.

"I'm finished." Rachel whispered fifteen minutes later. Shelby peered at Rachel over an essay, then put the paper down and smiled at Rachel who was nervously biting her inner cheek.

"You've been pretty serious this evening kiddo."

Rachel hung her head. Shelby waited for her to say something, but nothing came.

"But you know we need to get this all figured out before bed, right?" She moved her head to see her daughter's downcast and nervous eyes.

"Yes." Rachel answered.

"So let's talk about what happened between you and Mr. Evans." Shelby replied, trying to sound more casual, "Your aunt Carrie told me you didn't want to tell her why you got so upset. Can you tell me?"

Rachel would never tell her mom about the bullying. Shelby already knew she was picked on, and that was enough. She didn't need to know more.

"I-I wasn't doing anything." She assured. "I just checked my phone."

"What was so important that you had to check your phone? You know your school's really strict on that."

Rachel sighed and felt herself blush. It was a stupid reason and she hated feeling stupid in front of her mom.

"I-umm-I'd forgotten to text you back." Rachel moved her fork around in the bowl, "I didn't want you to be mad at me for not texting you back, so I checked if you sent me an angry message or something."

Shelby's eyes widened with realization. She sighed deeply at her daughter's unnecessary worry. Moments like these reminded Shelby that Rachel still felt like she was walking on eggshells.

"Oh sweetheart. I know you're at school, and if you don't text me back for simple things, it's okay. Sure if I had asked you a question I might've sent another text checking in, but I wouldn't have been mad."

Rachel sat up a bit in her chair, "Are you, um, mad now?" Her voice small and laced with hesitation, "Are you mad at me?"

"I'm not mad at you, Rach." Shelby leaned in to be closer to her daughter and tilted her daughter's chin up, "Was I upset that this happened? Yes. And we need to talk about your behavior with your teacher because that was unacceptable, and I won't tolerate it. But that doesn't make me angry with you."

Rachel scrunched her face up in thought, "So even though you're not happy with what I did, you're not angry?"

"I am not happy with your behavior, but that doesn't make me angry with you. Maybe in the past whenever you did something wrong, people immediately got mad at you, but that's not the case in our house."

"My aunt Carrie said you were angry with me." Rachel mumbled, "That's why-I umm, didn't know what you were gonna do to me."

"That's why you've been really nervous?"

A nod came from her small daughter.

Shelby didn't understand why Carrie had to scare her daughter like that. God, that woman could really get under her skin sometimes. She loved Rachel, Shelby didn't doubt that, but boy were her ways unorthodox.

"Honey, can you tell me what you thought I might do?"

The mother saw her daughter tense. "It's okay, Rachel. You can tell me. I won't judge you or make fun of you for it."

Rachel shrugged, "I thought you were gonna yell really loudly, then shove me into my room. I-" Her voice cracked, "I thought you were gonna say you were ashamed of me for being disrespectful."

Shelby looked up to the ceiling to prevent the sting of tears from falling. Her heart hurting for her baby.

"Bug, none of that was going to or is going to happen. Can I tell you what I was thinking?"

A head nod came.

"When you aunt Carrie called me, I was shocked because I knew you're usually a good girl at school. My next thought was that something must've happened to make you upset, and so I realized that I needed to talk to you. And once we talked like we're doing now I was going to give you a consequence, like the ones we wrote down...Was there any yelling or screaming involved in that?"

"No." Rachel, shook her head, "I guess not."

"I'm not saying that one day I'm not going to lose it. There'll be days I'm sure when you and I will fight. That will happen. But that doesn't mean I love you any less. I love you so deeply, and that's not dependent on how good you are. You can make mistakes Rachel. You are allowed to."

Her mother's words made her tear up. She smiled with so much gratefulness in her eyes that it made Shelby's eyes grow a sheen of tears.

"What made you so upset? With your teacher. What made you so upset that you said those mean things to him."

 _Don't tell her about Santana and Amanda._

"I was just having a hard day, and, and he kept asking about my phone and I really wasn't doing anything bad. I just wanted to check if you texted me."

"Why was your day hard, sweetie?"

Rachel shrugged, "I dunno. It doesn't matter." She muttered.

"Well I care, and I'd like to know. Maybe I can help."

"I just-umm, didn't sleep very well last night and I was tired and cranky." She bit her lip, "I don't know why I couldn't sleep, I guess I was just thinking about my dads."

It wasn't a total lie, she had thought about her dads throughout the night. About whether or not they loved her as much as her mom did, but that wasn't necessarily the reason she had blown up at her teacher. Her mom seemed to have bought it though. Thank God.

"Do you wanna talk about it, bug? About what you were thinking?" Shelby pushed. Her daughter didn't really talk much about her feelings for her dads. She was open about telling her experiences at their home. She loved to tell stories. That was the easy part. The hard part was getting her to say how she felt. Though, whenever they called she was extremely happy. Leroy was not as stressed during this time of year and was much more cheerful on the phone.

Rachel's lip quivered as she thought about her dads.

"Love?" Came her quiet, ever soothing voice.

"I don't wanna."

The mother rubbed her forehead with her hand, frustrated that Rachel always clammed up like this. She would need to push a little more next time, but it was getting late and she had promised to read to her child before bed.

"Alright, I won't push you this time. Look at me for this next part Rachel."

She waited for her daughter's dark brown eyes to meet hers. "I understand you were tired, but I don't want you disrespecting your teachers like that. I'm going to keep your phone for the rest of-"

"But my dads are supposed to call me Thursday!" Rachel immediately cried.

"Hey, hey. I know that." Shelby calmed her, "I'm not going to take that away from you. I'll give you the phone when they call."

Rachel leaned back into her chair, "O-okay."

"I'm keeping it for the rest of the week. If it happens again, you'll be grounded too. Got it?"

"Yes ma'am." The girl grabbed her plates, "Can I go upstairs now?"

Shelby smiled and stood up, grabbing the plates for her, "I'll wash these. I left your laundry on the bed, go ahead and put it away, then get yourself comfortable. I'll be there in a few to read to you. And I'll grab your phone tonight as well."

"You're still gonna read to me?" Rachel's eyes lit up.

"I told you I would, didn't I?" Shelby teased, tickling her daughter's side as Rachel stood up.

Rachel giggled and moved away, "I just thought that because-" Her mother smiled at her and winked, making all her doubtful thoughts cast away, "Nevermind. I'll be ready really fast. Promise!"

She ran up to her room excited to have her mom read to her.

When Shelby came back up, Rachel was not nearly ready for bed. The woman shook her head with her hands on her hips. Her daughter was atop her desk, kicking her legs up and down as she furiously texted someone on her phone.

"Didn't I ask you to put your clothes away?" Shelby lifted her eyebrow.

Rachel jumped at her mother's voice, then blushed. She had texted Kurt that she wouldn't have her phone for the week and they got into a conversation about what happened. Time had ran away from her.

She put her phone down next to her, "Oh...yeah. I was texting Kurt before I lost my phone. I guess I kinda just forgot."

 _At least she managed to look sheepish._ Shelby thought as she walked over to her girl.

Rachel let out a squeak of surprised embarrassment when her mom lifted her by the armpits off the desk, then set her down on the floor. "Well I hope you got to tell him that you won't have it for the week."

"Yeah." Rachel sighed, watching her mother pocket her phone.

"Alright, clothes away kiddo." Shelby added more sternly, with a two firm pats to her bottom that let Rachel know she needed to stop lollygagging.

The mother went to go put Rachel's phone in her room and came back to see that the clothes had finally been put away and Rachel was climbing up on the bed, with a book in hand.

"What book are we reading?" Shelby asked moving under the covers with her daughter.

"Allegiant." Rachel smiled. Her mother had bought her the Divergent series and the girl was instantly hooked. Now, it was even more exciting that her mom was gonna read some of it to her.

Shelby let Rachel get comfortable first. The day had been long. Technically it wasn't even over yet for the mother. She still had to finish grading. But the long night was worth the cuddle time she got with her daughter.

"Can I have Clifford, mom?" Rachel said softly as her head laid pushed up against her mother's side.

 _God she's so cute._

Shelby grabbed the stuffed dog that was on the nightstand and handed it to her daughter with a kiss atop her head, "Here you go, bug."

She instantly hugged it tight, "Thank you."

"It was a long day, huh?" Shelby said through a knowing smile, looking down at her clearly tired kid.

"Y-yeah." Rachel sighed, "I really am sorry about everything."

"No more apologies. I know you're sorry, love."

Rachel smiled at that and let her mother's words ease her. At least here in bed and snuggled up with her mom, her bullies, school, her aunt, her dads, all of that didn't matter. It was her time with her mommy, and that's all that mattered.

But unfortunately, that didn't carry over to her dreams. The stress and emotion of the day resurged in her dreams, and the girl slowly slid into a nightmare.

Shelby was still downstairs at around 1 am. There was one last essay to read, and she'd be done early, not having to worry about finishing up the grading tomorrow. She looked at the name on the essay.

It was Rachel's cousin's. Shelby chuckled, "Alright Lindsay, show me what you got."

The teacher delved into the teenager's book analysis, trying her best to stay focused so she could head to bed.

It wasn't even two minutes later when she heard Rachel call her. It was deathly quiet since it was the middle of the night so she could hear that Rachel was clearly looking for her somewhere upstairs.

"Mom?" It was slightly desperate, her voice quivering.

Her daughter's tone was enough to make Shelby put the essay down and get up. It was also the first time that Rachel had come to her at night.

"M-mom?! MOM!"

Shelby hurried her pace and was on the top step when Rachel ran out of her mother's room.

"Rachel, what's wrong?" Shelby asked alarmed at her daughter's terrified state.

A look of relief fell over a scared Rachel and her whole body shuddered, "M-mom." She cried and couldn't hold her sobs. She ran to her mother who opened up her arms and hugged her daughter tightly. Shelby instantly feeling how sweaty her daughter was.

"Sweetheart-" She was about to pull her from the embrace to get a look at her, but Rachel only sobbed louder, "No, don't! Please."

Shelby kissed her head, "Okay, Shhh, lovey. I'm right here."

"You weren't in your room. You said you'd be in your room if I needed you at night!" Rachel said hysterically.

"I was grading Ra-"

"You were gone! You were GONE!" Rachel cried hugging her mother's middle tighter, clutching onto her mother's pajama shirt.

"Oh, baby girl." Shelby's heart broke, "I'm here now. I'm here."

"You left me! You walked away in my dream!" Rachel cried, "You didn't love me anymore!"

Shelby was able to piece it together at that point, "I would never in a million years do that Rachel. That was a nightmare, love. Things that could and will never happen in real life."

No wonder the girl was in pieces. She woke up from a nightmare of her being abandoned, only to find her mother's room completely empty. See, in past nightmares Rachel lost Shelby because someone took her from her. In this nightmare Shelby walked away from her, and that's what truly made the difference.

But Rachel didn't want to tell her about the fact that her nightmare consisted of Rachel being bullied by her peers, her fathers, and her aunt and cousins. Shelby walked into the room, but a look of disgust overcame her mother and the woman turned her back. Rachel was screaming for her mom to help her, but Shelby only scoffed and said she was ashamed and would never be the mother of such a loser. The woman disappeared out the doors and the taunts grew louder, stronger, and more hurtful.

The girl could only nod and hiccup through her crys, "D-don't leave. Don't leave me! Please!"

Without another thought Shelby kissed her overworked daughter's cheek, "I'm not leaving you." She assured her and was about to lead her back into her room but Rachel refused once more, terrified to have to move, afraid that her dream would come true. The moment she let go, Shelby would walk away.

"I'm taking you to my room honey. You're sleeping with me tonight, but I need you to let go for a second."

Rachel finally lifted her head to look at her mom with her wide eyes that screamed fear and vulnerability, "C-can you, can you carry me?"

And in that moment Shelby caught sight of the inner and scared child that Rachel still was.

Rachel didn't care if she sounded like a baby. If she looked like one, or whatever. In fact, at that moment she wished she was a baby so she could get the love and affection that a baby did. She didn't care that Santana and Amanda would probably call her a mama's girl if they ever found out. She wanted her mama to make it all better. She needed her mama to fix this.

Shelby didn't say anything else. She only picked her daughter up, feeling Rachel's skinny legs wrap around her waist and her arms around her neck.

Shelby patted her back as she walked to the room, "I'm never leaving you Rachel. Never."

Once in the room, Shelby was glad she had undid her covers before. She gently laid her crying daughter on the bed.

"No more tears baby girl." Shelby begged her in a whisper. She carefully pulled Rachel back into a sitting position and brought the girl's shirt up to her runny nose and tears. The girl still hiccuping and murmuring that she didn't want Shelby to leave.

"I'm not going anywhere. You're stuck with me."

"Lift up your arms," Shelby then spoke gently, "Let's get you out of your wet jammies."

Rachel did as she was told. Shelby bunched the shirt up first and threw it on the floor.

"Lay back down sweetheart."

Once Rachel did, Shelby slid the girl's purple shorts down and off her small feet. Rachel was left bare save her pink little girl panties, at least that what Santana called them in the locker room. But Rachel didn't particularly mind her state of undress. She just wanted her mom to hold her, and besides she was really hot, and the cool air felt good on her skin.

Her mother maneuvered her inside the covers, then turned off the light. "Come here." Shelby whispered to her upset daughter. She gently moved the girl into her arms where Rachel could lay her head on Shelby's chest.

"It doesn't matter what you do, or what happens. I'm always here. I always will be." She rubbed her daughter's bare back and kissed the top of her head.

Rachel was just hitching her breaths by now. "I don't want you to leave mommy. Ever, ever!"

Rachel fisted her mom's shirt and tried to get impossibly closer to the woman.

Shelby felt her heart skip a beat and her eyes water. Her baby had just called her 'mommy.'

And although the mother wasn't sure what implications this nightmare would have on Rachel, but all the woman knew to do was try and soothe her.

So she did what she knew best.

"Lovebug, I want you to take deep breaths okay, and just relax."

"Stay here." Rachel held onto her mother's shirt tighter.

"I will. Now, shhhh."

Shelby started to hum the tune of Christina Perri's _A Thousand Years._ She felt her daughter's tension begin to dissipate.

 _Heart beats fast_

 _Colors and promises_

 _How to be brave?_

 _How can I love when I'm afraid to fall?_

 _But watching you stand alone,_

 _All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow._

Her voice was soft and soothing to Rachel. She patted the girl's pantied bottom as she sang and it gradually calmed the girl down.

 _I have died every day waiting for you_

 _Darling, don't be afraid I have loved you_

 _For a thousand years_

 _I'll love you for a thousand more_

 _Time stands still_

 _Beauty in all she is_

 _I will be brave_

 _I will not let anything take away_

 _What's standing in front of me_

 _Every breath_

 _Every hour has come to this_

After singing the song twice the preteen was completely asleep once more. Shelby stayed a few more minutes making sure that Rachel was completely out before going to turn off the living room lights and putting her things away downstairs.

But all of that was done in a rather robotic manner, her heart and mind were focused on her frightened daughter.

Back in the room her daughter was still peacefully asleep on her bare tummy. Her panties had slid down some and so the tops of her bottom was showing. It warmed Shelby's heart, imagining that a toddler Rachel probably looked rather similar to the way the 11 year old looked in front of her.

The mother watched her for a moment. How small she was. How vulnerable to the world she looked.

Who said parenting was easy?...Right. No one.

Finally, Shelby slid in once more, adjusting her girl's undies. And she wasn't surprised when eventually Rachel found her way back into her embrace.

 **Hope you liked it! Please review! And don't worry Shelby will find out about Santana and Amanda soon enough. Turns out Shelby and Santana already know each other, and that probably won't sit well with Rachel!**


	5. You're My Baby

Rachel peeked into her mom's room before stepping in. It was a Saturday night and Shelby had gone upstairs to shower. The small eleven year old jumped on the bed and wiggled her feet as she settled into the middle of her mother's king sized mattress. She dropped her book and Clifford next to her as she got comfortable.

Life felt perfect whenever she was in Shelby's room. Her mother's bed had quickly become the most comfortable and comforting spot in their whole house, well, outside of her mama's arms. But the sixth grader found the burgundy fuzzy blanket that was always laid at the edge, along with the large fluffy pillows to be the best combination. Plus the fact that her mom would always end up right there with her. Sometimes Rachel pinched herself because she couldn't believe that life with Shelby was real.

By the time her mother came out of the restroom, freshly showered, Rachel was completely sucked into the plot of the latest book she was reading: _Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children._

Shelby couldn't help the smile that graced her lips. Rachel hadn't even looked up when she came out, but she was sprawled out right in the middle of her bed, taking up way too much space. The mother thought it cute, the little face of concentration that her daughter put on as she read. Rachel's eyebrows furrowed and her lips frowned slightly, occasionally biting her lip when she got to really good parts.

"Hi sweet pea. I see you took up the whole bed."

Without stopping her reading, the girl wordlessly sat up and crossed her legs, "Sorry." She mumbled.

Shelby rolled her eyes and knew that Rachel would put the book down once she finished that page. And without fail, that's exactly what happened.

"Good book?" Shelby asked going into her closet to figure out what to wear for the next day. The woman heard small feet thud onto the ground and a pitter patter follow her into the closet.

"It's so good! Do you wanna know what's happening? I just started and I'm already sucked in!" Came her gleeful response. One that the mother had expected. All of her books were _so good._

Shelby gladly accepted and let her daughter excitedly explain to her the plot of her book. Rachel loved to do it, and the mother loved to listen.

See, Rachel had many insecurities, of this Shelby knew. The little girl had many fears and worries. So much so, that Shelby sometimes wondered if a therapist was needed. Her fathers had done a number on her, and it felt like there were times that Rachel honestly believed that her mother would leave her. That Shelby's love for her was temporary. It killed Shelby to know this.

... ... ...

 **'** ** _It's only been a month since she's moved in. There's still such a long way to go.'_**

 _The mother found herself thinking this just two nights ago when Rachel almost wet herself in fear after losing sight of her mother at the rather large city park. Shelby had given the girl two dollars to buy a popsicle from the ice cream man, and on Rachel's way back to where her mother was she took a wrong turn and hadn't realized it. The 11 year old's sense of direction got turned around and she immediately thought that her mother had abandoned her, after all the bench in front of her was empty._

 **"** ** _She gave me the two dollars, so she could get a chance to leave. You're so annoying! You made her leave'_**

 **'** ** _That's not true she loves you! You're just lost. Right? RIGHT?!'_**

 _Her mind battled itself._

 _The girl felt so distressed that it didn't occur to her to just call her mom on the phone. Instead, Rachel resorted to yelling out in search of Shelby. Those few minutes of calling and running were beginning to feel like hours to the young pre-teen._

 _Shelby finally heard her daughter's voice yelling for her and she stood up from the bench she was actually in, instantly. Rachel hadn't been gone that long and the mother wasn't too worried._

 _The girl had finally ran her way back to where Shelby was and saw her mother jogging over to her, "Rachel, what happened?"_

 _Her daughter's face was full of absolute panic._

 _"I-I-I-" The girl couldn't talk. She just broke down in tears and crashed into her mother, wrapping her arms around Shelby's middle._

 _Others at the park began to rubberneck. The 11 year old wasn't exactly being subtle._

 _"Okay, okay, Love." Shelby rubbed her daughter's back, wondering what in the hell had happened, "Let's go home. I've got you. Let's just go."_

 _The adrenaline in Rachel's system was finally dying down and it was then that she realized the pressure in her bladder was pretty immense, just as her mom was letting go of their embrace._

 _The girl instantly crossed her legs and held herself, "Mommy!" Rachel said desperately, moving her feet in place._

 _Shelby knew exactly what that meant. She had nieces and nephews that did the exact same potty dance._

 _"I-I hafta-"_

 _The mother didn't bat an eye, "The bathrooms are right over there. Let's walk quickly."_

 _The woman walked with a mission with Rachel in tow, ignoring everyone else's prying eyes. The park bathrooms were not the cleanest and Shelby would've highly preferred to have Rachel use the restroom at home, but the girl wouldn't make it without having an accident, and Shelby was not in the business of embarrassing her daughter._

 _Rachel ran straight into the stall once they reached the entrance of the restrooms, and didn't give Shelby a chance to put paper towels down around the seat._

 _"Try not to sit on it!" Shelby called out from the other side, although the girl paid no heed._

 _When they got home, and after having taken a shower that her mother insisted she take, Rachel admitted what had happened and what she'd been thinking to Shelby._

 _The mother had waited in her daughter's room for her to get out of the shower._

 _"Come on lovebug, let's talk." Shelby offered Rachel a warm smile and an extended hand._

 _"Do we have to to?" The girl asked, slightly embarrassed by her actions._

 _"Yes, honey. We do."_

 _Rachel didn't know why she freaked out as much as she did. Looking back now it seemed silly. Plus she caused a scene. Number one rule that's been instilled in her: NEVER CAUSE A SCENE IN PUBLIC._

 _Her dads got so mad at her for doing that once that she was practically dragged back to the apartment when she was six years old. Her arm hurt from how hard Leroy held it all the way back._

 _"Are you mad that I was crying in public?" Rachel asked shyly._

 _Shelby grabbed her daughter's hand and kneeled down to her daughter's level, "I could never get mad at that Rachel. You were scared. Your reaction was understandable."_

 _Shelby could tell that Rachel was thinking back to a time with her dads. She stood back up and led them downstairs, "Let's go sit on the couch baby girl. So we can talk about what you're thinking right now."_

 _The girl still needed to put shorts on, as she was just in a light blue tshirt and white undies, but it was just the two of them, so it didn't really matter. Shelby figured taking her daughter downstairs to figure this all out was more important._

 _They both sat on the sofa, and the girl leaned into her mother. She took a deep breath and was soothed by Shelby's scent._

 _"Tell me what you're thinking, love." Shelby prodded softly._

 _At that moment, all Rachel was thinking about was that time when Leroy dragged her home and how different it was from her mom's reaction, so she decided to take the risk and tell her mom about it._

 _It was hard though. Her voice barely came out as a squeak,_

 _"Daddy hurt my arm once because I threw a tantrum at the store. I-I was six."_

 _Shelby's blood instantly boiled. She tried so hard to fight the tears that immediately threatened to fall. Not now though. Her daughter was opening up. This was a time to be there for Rachel._

 _"I won't do that to you." Was all Shelby could say._

 _Rachel looked up at her mom from where her head was leaning on her chest. She moved up and kissed her mother's cheek, "I know. You're my mom. And you love me to the moon and back."_

 _Shelby hugged her daughter close, kissing the side of her head, "Exactly, right."_

 _The pair spent more time talking out what had happened at the park. The mother was glad her daughter could open up so easily._

 _Once it was all explained, Shelby couldn't help but sigh as she put a gentle hand on her currently timid, daughter's cheek, "You know what Rach?" She spoke softly._

" _What?" Rachel said after a sniffle._

 _The mother gave her a sad smile, "From now on, every single day, before you go to bed and right after I say I love you, I'm going to tell you that I'm never leaving you."_

 _Rachel bit her lip and looked down, but her mom picked her chin up so she was still looking at her eyes._

" _And some days you'll believe it, other days you won't. Some days you'll be so mad at me you'll just completely ignore it."_

" _No I won't." Rachel assured her. In the whole month they'd been together, she'd never stayed upset with her mom for more than a few hours, and even then that was pushing it!_

 _Shelby smiled, wise enough to know that with Rachel's willfulness and her own stubbornness the two were bound to get into arguments, especially as Rachel headed into her teen years._

" _Trust me bug, you will. And that's okay. I promise you, that's okay. It's normal, even. Because other days might be really hard and all you'll want to hear is those last words I say to you. They'll be a source of comfort. More than they usually are." Shelby could see the wheels in her daughter's mind turning, "But, are you ready for this next part?"_

 _Rachel nodded her head._

" _You sure?"_

 _Rachel's eyes widened slightly. "I'm sure mommy." She whispered._

" _But, most importantly, one day you'll realize that you've accepted it as a solid truth. A truth that nothing or no one could bend or break."_

 _Rachel slowly moved and laid her head onto her mom's lap and curled in, "Mom...I-I hope that day comes soon." She mumbled._

" _I hope so too, love."_

 _The pair watched Mulan once again because it always made Rachel feel better._

... ... ...

And so, Shelby's thoughts were never too far from the very real fact that her daughter still felt uneasy, and needed her constant reassurance.

But, one thing _was_ for sure, her daughter just lit up whenever it came to two things: books and music. So Shelby indulged her in every way she could when it came to those things.

Rachel finally stopped talking about her newest book and plopped right onto the floor, content to watch her mom sift through her clothes. This was becoming a nightly ritual for them.

"That does sound like a good book, bug." Shelby told her in that voice that made the little girl melt with happiness.

"They're making it into a movie, did you know that mom? I didn't know that, but I googled it."

Shelby found the right top, a navy blue blouse, for tomorrow and grabbed it from the hanger, "Then I guess we have to go see it when it comes out, huh?" Shelby answered, moving on to select her trousers.

"Would you really take me?" Rachel's eyes widened and she sat up on her knees.

"Yes ma'am I would."

"It's a date then!" The girl called out excitedly, standing up and running back out to jump right back onto her mom's bed.

As Shelby came out from the closet, she shook her head good naturedly "Am I gonna have a snuggle monster in my bed tonight?"

Rachel giggled and held the sheets closer to her. "Can I sleep in here?"

"Of course you can. Do you want me to read the rest of the chapter you're on?" Shelby made her way over after putting her clothes for tomorrow on top of her dresser.

"Ummm...Yes, please." The girl spoke shyly, remembering a not so pleasant incident.

Santana's words from the day before rang in her head. It had been two weeks since her last major incident with Amanda and her crew. But Friday had ended that streak.

… …. ...

 _Amanda and Santana were discussing their weekend plans in class, while they were supposed to have been working on a history project. Rachel got frustrated and turned around telling them to shut up, and that it was no wonder that Ms. Rogers loved her and couldn't stand them._

 _That did not go over well with the Latina._

" _Are you mad that we're actually cool enough to have a life? Bet you're not gonna hang out with any of your friends this weekend."_

" _That's because she has no friends." Amanda quipped._

 _Santana was going to leave it at that, but Rachel's comeback rustled her feathers._

" _At least I have brains unlike you two."_

 _The Latina's eyes narrowed, "Lame, man-hands. If you're so bright, why do you still act like a baby?"_

 _She had her. Santana knew it, "Is your mommy gonna read to you tonight? What book's it gonna be? Cat in the Hat?"_

 _Amanda snickered at the blush that rose on Rachel's face. Then it dawned on her. "Wait, is that true? Berry, does your mom still read to you?"_

" _It's Corcoran, not Berry!" Rachel yelled in anger._

" _What's going on over there?" Ms. Rogers started walking over._

" _Nothing Miss. We're fine!" Santana chirped happily._

 _Amanda was cracking up, "Oh my God, she really does, doesn't she? You really are such a baby. Go back to kindergarten!"_

" _Stop it." Rachel gritted her teeth, refusing to show Amanda the tears that she felt wanted to come._

" _Does she give you a bedtime bottle too?"_

 _Rachel roughly got up and grabbed the bathroom pass._

 _Santana had had enough and elbowed her friend, "Shut up Amanda. Just drop it."_

 _Santana frowned. She shouldn't have brought that up. Those text messages she had read were private between Rachel and Shelby. The tall pre-teen had a split second thought of apologizing, but never carried through._

 _Santana knew Amanda didn't exactly come from the warmest of families, and so she thought a lot of things were too childish for her. Santana wondered what she'd do if Amanda found out how much of a little kid she was around her own parents._

 _Santana's mom and dad still told her when bath time and bedtime was. She would still run to their room after a nightmare and ask her mom to sing her back to sleep. They still gave her time outs for things in an embarrassing dedicated corner, and yes, sometimes even had to give her a few warning swats. Those were the worst._

 _Plus, Santana absolutely loved cuddling with her dad after he came home from work. Like clockwork, by 8 pm Santana would be on her father's lap in her favorite polar bear jammies, freshly showered, watching soccer with him. Her dad occasionally kissing the top of her head._

 _Then, in the 30 minutes before her bedtime, her mom would come down with their daughter's baby blanket that she still slept with, and gave it to the girl, who would put it near her cheek and nuzzle into the light pink softness. Then her father would switch the TV to Disney Channel, so Santana could watch her own shows before carrying the girl up to bed. Mr. Lopez dreaded the day when Santana would be too big for him to carry. The day was coming and he absolutely hated it._

 _Yes, big bad Santana, was just Sanny to her mami and papi. Their little girl._

 _So in her heart Santana knew that if Rachel was a "baby" by Amanda's standards then so was she. But, she'd never admit to that. Nobody had to know and nobody ever would. Well, Quinn knew. But that's because she'd spent many nights and days over at Santana's. And the blonde had gotten the same loving treatment, and ate up every minute of it. The Lopez's knew how much love Quinn needed in her life._

….

Shelby looked at her daughter skeptically, "If you don't want me to read honey, I don't have to."

"I do want you too, sorry. I was just...thinking about something."

The mother took the book that Rachel was offering her. Shelby had a hunch as to what the problem was. "You know Rach, my dad read to me up until I was 17. Whenever I wanted him to, he'd do it."

"Really?" The girl couldn't believe it, "You didn't think you were too old?"

The mother shook her head, "I was at home with my mom and dad. The two people that loved me more than anything in the world. They didn't care, so I didn't care either." She looked at her small daughter, "Do you think you're too old for me to read to you sweetheart?"

"I like it when you do." Rachel said sadly, "...But, Amy at school doesn't get read to at night." The girl added with a slight pout.

"Well Amy at school is missing out."

"But does that make me a baby then?"

"Absolutely not." Shelby assured her, "You know out of all the kids at your school, you've probably had to deal with more grown up stuff than most of them. And the fact that you are as poised, and as collected as you are, proves that you, Rachel Corcoran, are not a baby."

Besides, Shelby could think of a few 11 year olds that still loved to be loved up. Maribel Lopez's daughter, Santana, was one of them. Shelby used to babysit the girl up until last year when the family moved to another neighborhood in town. But Shelby remembered just how much the girl melted into her Maribel's arms when the mother would pick her up.

The last time she took care of the girl was when she was 10.

... ... ...

 _"I missed you mami." Santana told Maribel tearfully while hugging her._

 _The moment the 10 year old heard the doorbell ring she sped off from the kitchen, eager to see her mom._

 _"It was only a few hours princess." Maribel told her sweetly, with a kiss to her head, "It's like when you're at a sleepover."_

 _Santana just shrugged and tugged twice on her mom's shirt subtly, letting Maribel know she wanted to be carried. The mother rolled her eyes. Her daughter was the badass of her friends, but could be such a baby at home. The mother didn't mind though._

 _"You're getting too big to carry sweetheart." Maribel half joked. Shelby smiled at the interaction._

 _Santana pouted and held on tighter, "Please mama? I missed you."_

 _The mother sighed and gave Shelby a knowing smile, "Alright my big girl, arms up."_

 _Santana gladly did so and let her mom lift her up. She laid her head on her mother's shoulder as she felt Maribel being to soothingly rub her back._

 _"I guess I should take my not so little one to bed now."_

 _"Mami!" Santana whined with a blush. Usually her mom didn't give her such a hard time about this._

 _"Oh hush you." Maribel said with a pat to her bottom, "You know I'll always jump at a chance of having you in my arms. Usually you're all wrapped up with your father."_

 _Shelby laughed at the comment, "She was perfect. No complaints."_

 _"I'm glad." Maribel replied, "Thank you so much."_

 _"No worries." Shelby assured her, "Sanny's always a lot of fun." The woman looked to the girl who looked absolutely content in her mother's arms. It hurt a little when Shelby realized she would never have that with her own daughter._

 _"Goodnight Santana."_

 _"Night Ms. Corcoran." Santana mumbled._

... ... ...

 _'Well, shit Shelby. Santana goes to the same school as Rachel. You need to ask if they're friendly with each other, and maybe arrange some time for them to hang out if they don't know each other.'_ The woman thought.

Rachel snuggled in close to her mother's side and wrapped her arm around her mother's waist. Shelby took that as her cue to start reading.

Just as the girl's eyes were drooping she asked one final question, "Mommy?"

Shelby heard the grogginess and decided to close the book. She put it on the night stand and shifted so she could rub Rachel's belly, "Yes, love?"

"...I can still be your baby though, right?"

Shelby chuckled, "Yes, you will always be my baby."

"Will you still read to me, and rub my tummy when I'm 17?"

"Yes, love. I will."

"And you'll still let me sit on your lap when I'm sad or just want cuddles?" Rachel asked, holding tightly onto Clifford.

"As long as you still want to, then my answer will always be yes." Shelby noticed Rachel still had a lot of questions, but was biting her tongue. The mother started to hum a lullaby, "Go to sleep baby. I'm right here. And whenever and whatever you need from me, I will always try my best to give it you. You will always be my little Rachel."

"Okay then." The girl mumbled.

Shelby turned off the lights and then kissed her daughter's forehead, before going back to rubbing her belly to ease her to sleep.

"Goodnight Rach." Shelby whispered once she could see that the girl was about to sleep, "I love you. And I'll never leave you."

 **A short, fluffy chapter headed into some drama! Rachel will find out that Shelby knows (and likes) Santana in the next chapter!... It's been a while, I know. I think I'll only be able to post during breaks at this point, if people are still interested in my stories. I still hope you enjoy the content. Let me know what you think of this chapter! Review!**


	6. Tired and Worried

"How's she doing Shelly?" Came the voice of the eldest Corcoran woman. Shelby's mother.

Shelby sighed, feeling like an open book standing across from her mother as they sipped on some coffee. Her mom had sprung a surprise visit on Rachel and Shelby after having gone into town to do some shopping.

The family had already met Rachel once, and Susan and Larry, Rachel's grandparents had visited them four times already.

The 11 year old had warmed up to them by the third visit. Susan was excited to see both her baby and her grandbaby today, but had gotten to their home just as Rachel had fallen asleep reading her latest book up in her room.

"We have our own pattern now, so that's nice. Sometimes it feels like she's been here forever and I cherish those moments so much." Shelby smiled, thinking of the day to day with her daughter. The mundane with Rachel was so wonderful whenever she thought about it.

"But there are other times when it's so very clear how unloved she felt for so long." Shelby put the cup of coffee down and shook her head, "She still feels that I'll leave her. She has these awful nightmares that will leave her shaking and crying."

Susan Corcoran could see just how much Rachel's own hardships were affecting Shelby.

"Oh, sweetheart."

Shelby sniffled a bit, realizing that she was yet to pour out her fears to anyone but herself. Her sister had been rather busy lately and Shelby hadn't had an opportunity to talk to her usual confidante.

Having her mom's sympathetic ear was making her feel so vulnerable. The woman felt her eyes sting with tears as her mom rubbed her hand soothingly.

"You are enough for her Shelby."

"But I'm the reason she's so broken." Shelby couldn't hold it and let out a sob. She had stifled her emotion of the situation for Rachel's sake, but couldn't do so with her mom.

Susan went over and stood her youngest daughter up, leading her to the living room. Shelby, as adult as she was, felt like a child again standing a few inches from the couch as her mother sat down on the couch and patted her lap.

"Come here." Susan beckoned her baby girl who was now openly crying.

And Susan saw the child in Shelby, as her daughter stubbornly shook her head, with tears dripping down her cheeks, and said, "I-I'm fine. I just need to take a breath."

But Susan was no fool, so she did exactly as she would've done when Shelby was Rachel's age.

"Okay, well, I think I'll prepare something for you and Rachel to eat then. You get yourself together and come into the kitchen with me when you're ready."

She stood up slowly and watched her daughter's eyes widen and tear up even more at the thought of her mom leaving her in such a state.

Shelby tried to stay strong. Her mind arguing that she was much too old to need her mom in this manner. But watching Susan walk into the kitchen made her feel even more emotionally vulnerable.

"M-mom wait." She gave in.

Susan hid a smile and turned around, knowing all along that her daughter would stop her.

Shelby gave her mother a pitiful look that said please stay with me. The older woman walked back to the couch and Shelby quickly snuggled into her mom's side.

"You are not to blame for any of the pain your little girl went through." She told her daughter fiercely as she held her.

"It-it feels that way, m-mom." Shelby wiped her nose on her mom's shirt as she hid her face further in.

"Oh, my beautiful girl." Susan whispered, "My beautiful, strong girl. You are the reason she's flourishing. And you will be the reason that she rises above it all."

Shelby could only nod in response.

"Let it out Shelly. You need to let it all out." Susan whispered as Shelby allowed herself to cry. All the while Susan's heart was breaking for both the girls in the home.

It was about half an hour later that Susan noticed her daughter's breathing had evened out. She untangled herself gently and could see that Shelby had fallen asleep after having a good cry.

"Some things never change" the older woman thought.

She adjusted Shelby onto the couch and laid the throw blanket over her daughter's shoulders. Now that both Rachel and Shelby were asleep, Susan decided to get started on dinner for the two Corcoran women.

15 minutes later that Susan heard footsteps upstairs. She smiled knowing that Rachel was awake. The grandmother peeked into the living room. Shelby was still asleep. Not wanting for Rachel to unintentionally wake her she climbed up the stairs and knocked on the preteen's door.

"It's open." She heard Rachel tell her.

Susan opened the door slowly, not wanting to frighten Rachel with her presence. "It's Nana, Rach." She said.

Rachel spun around in her bed and looked quizzically at her grandma, confused as to why she was there. Susan chuckled at her granddaughter's reaction then went further in and brought Rachel for a hug, "H-hi nana." The girl finally managed to say once Susan let her go from their embrace.

"You look stunned kiddo." She smiled warmly at her granddaughter.

"Sorry." Rachel immediately apologized and looked down at her light blue, socked feet, "I didn't know you were coming. I'm sorry. I was just surprised."

Susan sighed at Rachel's reaction, the conversation she had with Shelby feeling much more real at the very moment.

"It's alright Rach. I just dropped in as a surprise to both you and your mom."

Feeling much better now that her grandma didn't seem mad at her reaction the preteen looked back up and smiled, "Oh, okay. Where's my mom? Is she downstairs?"

"Yes, and she's asleep, so we need to be quiet so we don't wake her."

The 11 year old looked at her in confusion, "Mama's taking a nap?" She had never seen her mother nap outside of bedtime. The thought seemed foreign to Rachel.

Meanwhile, Susan thought the word 'mama' coming from the small child was the cutest thing ever, "Yes, sweetie." She smiled softly and pushed some of Rachel's messy hair into place, "She was really tired."

Rachel's mind went into overdrive immediately. She thought back to the night before.

The grandmother saw Rachel frown, "What's wrong Rachel?"

"It's just….D-did I make her tired?" The girl's eyes widened, "D-did I make mama too tired?"Seeing the girl questions herself like this was painful.

Sympathy ran through the woman's body. "Sweetheart-" Susan tried, "Don't worry about it." Although she knew it was a lame comfort for her granddaughter with such a troubled history.

Rachel shook her head, trying to fight the thoughts. But her fathers' telling her how ungrateful, and how thoughtless she could be started to ring. Her mom loved her so much more than her daddies did. How could she have exhausted her? How could she have been so thoughtless with her mama of ALL people?

"No, you don't understand!" Rachel stood up, her thoughts getting the best of her, and started to pace the floor worriedly before she finally stopped and looked to Susan with so much regret, "I-I had a bad dream last night and, and I decided to wake her up so she could make me feel better. But then I just, I just kept crying and she stayed awake with me and gave me apple juice and rubbed my tummy until I fell asleep! Daddy would be so mad at me for making them overtired. I can't do that to mom!"

Susan finally stood up from the bed, appalled at how the little 11 year old over analyzed her every move. "Rachel Corcoran, stop right there." Susan's voice exuded just the right amount of authority to make the girl stop in her tracks.

"Stop doing that to yourself." She demanded, pulling the girl back onto the bed and sitting right next to her. "Stop blaming and second guessing your actions. It will drive you crazy."

Rachel bit her lip. Her whole life had been her questioning her every move. Her grandmother's request wasn't exactly a simple one.

"But, but you said mom was really tired. The only reason someone is really tired is because something changed their routine, right? Something they're not used to." Rachel tugged at her sleeve, "I changed mom's routine."

Susan smiled sadly at her, "Sweet girl, you are such a smart one. So perceptive for your age."

Rachel smiled at that, feeling rather proud.

Susan continued on , "But you need to understand that you are the best change to your mother's routine that has ever happened. She loves you and wants to do all the things she's been doing for you. Like reading to you, going to the park or watching movies, making dinner together, and rubbing your tummy after a nightmare. Let me tell you, those are the best parts about being a mom."

Rachel sighed and hung her head. She had overreacted, just like she always did. It wasn't hard for her to admit that, it was just hard not to overreact in the first place, and that gnawing feeling of guilt was also so hard to get over afterwards.

"Mom always tells me the same thing." The small girl admitted softly. "I'm trying to be normal." Susan saw the tears that formed in Rachel's eyes, "It's just…it's hard." She whispered.

The 11 year old had considered her grandparents trustworthy people after her second visit to their home. Her mom had told her no more cookies but her grandma slipped her one when Shelby was in the kitchen and winked at her. Then her grandpa did the same thing half an hour later! She always got so many sweets when she was at their home.

And then her mom had to run errands and told her that she'd be back in two hours. Rachel nodded trying to act like she wasn't afraid of staying alone with her grand parents without the comfort and safety of her mom, but Shelby read right through her. She gave her daughter a deep kiss with gentle and rhythmic pats to her bottom, letting her girl hold onto the hug for as long as she needed.

Rachel didn't want to be pried away but her grandfather led her to their couch and began to distract her with stories of Shelby's childhood, while her grandma brought her a cup with warm milk and a bit of honey, just like Shelby said she liked it. Sure enough Rachel had forgotten that her mother was gone.

"Hey now." Susan cooed, gently having the girl face her, and wiping at the stray tears that fell, "Your mom doesn't want you to be normal, she just wants you to know that you are so unconditionally loved, but she also isn't naïve and understands that it will take time, and she's willing to wait all the time in the world."

Rachel peeked up at her grandmother and found the older woman smiling down at her, "How are you so sure about that?…Sometimes I think that one day she'll get tired of me being like this." Rachel looked back at her hands, "Like my daddies. They gave me away."

The grandmother's heart felt like it broke into a million tiny pieces as it constricted at Rachel's words. The tiny girl said it with so much finality, as if she had come to terms with her fathers' abandonment and blamed it all on herself. Susan had been resistant to the idea of therapy when Shelby had mentioned it earlier that afternoon, but seeing Rachel expose her worries now helped her understand Shelby's reasoning.

"I'm sure because you know how you and your mom talk about things all the time?"

The grandmother waited for Rachel to nod.

"Well, your mom has me to talk to and she'll always tell me about how much she loves you and how proud she is of you. Not once has she every blamed you, or been upset about you not being 'normal'"

"She talks about me?"

" _All the time._ "

"I-I didn't know that."

"Well now you do." She bopped the small girl's nose then leaned into hug the child.

Rachel took in her grandmother's warmth. Her grandma always smelled like coconut. It made the 11 year old smile.

"Now your mother told me you came back from your aunt's house and you needed a bath or shower after playing soccer with your cousins, am I correct?" Susan said releasing their hug and holding the girl by the shoulders.

Rachel huffed. She didn't want a bath in the middle of the day. She liked taking her baths at night.

"Can't it wait 'til nighttime? I wanna go downstairs, not take a bath."

Susan wanted to roll her eyes. As perceptive and analytical as Rachel was, she was still very much a kid.

"Haven't you already stalled enough?" She rose an eyebrow and gave Rachel a look that reminded the girl so much of Shelby.

 _'That's where mom learned it from,'_ thought Rachel.

"You told your mom you'd do it after you finished your book, but ended up asleep."

"Oh." Damn, she knew about that. "But-"

"No buts, little lady."

"But I don't want to." Rachel said rather firmly, for no other reason than the fact that she was 11 years old and sometimes they get an attitude.

Susan saw the girl's face hardening with obstinacy and she made a quick decision to get sterner.

"Rachel you can go in there without my help, or with my help which might involve my hand and your bottom. So choose one."

The woman wasn't planning on spanking the girl. Maybe just giving her one good swat to get her moving.

Rachel stood up grumpily. She had seen her grandma swat her 12 year old cousin Emma before.

 _The girl had told one of the younger cousins to 'fuck off' and Susan had heard her. The woman held her at her side and gave her six quick, but sharp swats on the girls leggings._

 _"Ow Nana! Owwie!" Susan let her go after the sixth swat, and wagged a finger at her, "Keep it up Emma, and I'll have your mother wash your mouth out with soap."_

 _Emma's eyes filled with concern as she rubbed at her bottom unabashedly. Her mother had already warned her the night before that if she heard more foul language out of her mouth directed at another person she'd lose her phone and get a spanking._

 _"No nana, don't tell my mom. Please don't!"_

 _"If you can act right from here on out, then I won't."_

 _Emma nodded her head furiously and then eagerly accepted the hug that her nana offered afterwards._

 _Emma was rather embarrassed that Rachel had seen that. So far she'd been excelling at coming off as a badass, untouchable cousin. But grandma had to ruin that for her. Now Rachel knew that she could be placated with a couple of swats and a threat of her mommy finding out like some little five year old. Ugh. It sucked to be 12._

"Fine, I'll go." Rachel muttered and trudged into the bathroom. Susan chose to ignore the attitude. The kid did as she was told and was happy with that.

Susan sat in silence as she gave Rachel's room a good look. She knew her other grandchildren extremely well as she helped raise them while the parents were starting off their careers when the kids were younger. It saddened her that she didn't get that opportunity with Rachel, but was determined to get to that point.

The whole family already loved the girl, after all.

"Nana?" Rachel had opened the door to her bathroom and was wrapped up in only her towel. She had just turned on the water and was waiting for it to warm up.

"What is it hon? You need help with something?" Susan asked.

Rachel shook her head, "Is it um-is it okay if I still ask my mom about her being tired and if she blames it on me?" Rachel bit her lip, "I know we talked about it, and I know that mom's not mad or anything, but I just," The girl was growing frustrated with herself. It was like her head and her heart couldn't agree with each other.

"Just need to hear it from her?" Susan offered her an explanation.

Rachel nodded, "You're not gonna be disappointed that I ask?"

"No sweetheart, I understand." Susan smiled and got up from the bed, "Come on, get in there now." She laid a soft kiss on Rachel's head, "I love you Rach. I'll be downstairs."

… …. ….

Rachel was showered and dressed in 40 minutes. She had put on a pair of navy blue jogger sweats and a loose, white t-shirt that said "I love New York." The shirt reminded her of her daddies. They had bought it for her before she left to her aunt's. She had begged for a tourist shirt like that for years and they finally caved the day she left for Ohio.

When she reached the top of the stairs she heard her grandmother and mom in the kitchen talking about her aunt Kirsten. Something about her law firm and a case her aunt's been overwhelmed with, stuff that went over her head honestly. As she walked down the girl caught a whiff of coffee and figured the two women were drinking coffee and sitting at the island.

Her mom's back was to her as she entered the kitchen, so Susan saw her first.

"Hi sweetheart." She beamed.

Shelby couldn't help the wide smile that graced her lips when she realized who her mother was talking to. She turned around and saw her pride and joy standing uncomfortably at the archway in a t shirt that swallowed her whole and reached her thighs.

Rachel had been trying to decide whether to come in or not. It seemed like the two of them were having a serious conversation, and she had been taught never to intrude.

"Come here love." Shelby said warmly, extending her arm out as an invitation. Rachel quickly walked over and nuzzled into her mom's side. Shelby kissed the top of her daughter's still damp head and moved her hand under the girl's tshirt to rub her back. Shelby had quickly learned how much Rachel loved skin to skin contact, and so she would always subtly provide that for Rachel.

"Thank you for showering." The mother whispered as Susan looked on at the pair.

"Mhm." Rachel murmured, relishing in the warmth of her mother's hand softly rubbing her back.

"We were waiting for you so we could have dinner." Shelby added. She could sense Rachel had something weighing on her, since she was hiding herself into her side. Thankfully, Shelby knew what it was. Her mom had explained to her the conversation she had with Rachel.

"I am kinda hungry." The girl mumbled.

"Good!" Susan exclaimed, "Because I'm starved. I should be heading out pretty soon as well. Then I'll leave you two be."

She wanted Rachel and Shelby a chance to get some alone time together anyway.

It was about an hour later that Shelby and Rachel found themselves saying goodbye to Susan.

When Shelby closed the door she put an arm around her daughter who'd been rather quiet since coming down.

"Are you still tired bug?" Shelby asked, hoping Rachel would spill and tell her the worries she had.

"No, I'm okay. Are you still tired? Nana said you took a nap."

Shelby shook her head, "Nope. I'm wide awake now. Would you like to help me with the dishes?" She tried to sound lighthearted to her daughter, wanting Rachel to lead this conversation.

The girl nodded and followed her mom into the kitchen. She was trying hard to avoid her thoughts.

 _'You OVER REACTED. Mom is fine and she doesn't care that you woke her up. Just move on!'_

But her concern eventually won out.

"Umm, mom?" She asked as she dried a pot that her mom handed her.

"Hmmm?"

"Were you tired because I made you stay up after I had a bad dream?"

Shelby grabbed another plate and rinsed it. She looked at her daughter with a small smile. She had thought about out right lying and telling the girl 'of course not' but she knew that would not be helpful for her daughter's growth.

"Partially. We did stay up for a while, but I also had an early morning, and it had been a long week in general at school."

"So you were really tired before?"

The woman nodded as she handed the plate to Rachel, "I was."

Rachel dried the dishware in silence. Shelby waited it out, knowing that her daughter was processing her words.

The girl put the plate down and looked at her mom, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"What do you mean?"

"When I asked if you could stay up with me until I fell asleep, why didn't you tell me you were tired. I-I would've fallen back asleep on my own. I've done it before. It's okay if you told me that you were tired. I would've understood. My aunt Carrie is always tired, and so are my daddies. I get it, mom. I really do. "

"Sweetheart, " Shelby said equally desperate for her daughter to understand. Shelby thought of the emotional catharsis she had with her mother. Her mom had so much faith that she could help Rachel grow through her insecurities. In times like this it was hard to see that, but her mom's words kept her confident. "I honestly wasn't even thinking about how tired I was. I was thinking about you. It's just a part of being a good parent. We do these things for our children."

Rachel considered her mom's words, "Y-you're not even a tiny bit upset that you didn't get enough sleep last night?"

"Not even the tiniest bit, love."

Shelby looked into the sink and saw that there were just a few cups left to wash. She turned off the water and dried her hands, then put the dish Rachel was holding and put it on the counter, then picked her up from under her arms.

The girl squealed not expecting to have been hoisted in the air like that, but quickly recovered and held onto her mother's neck.

"Come on, let's watch a movie Rachie bug." Although they only had a few months together Shelby was adept to when Rachel needed to feel coddled. It was more than most kids, but Rachel had missed 11 years of nurturing.

The brunette girl nodded and felt warmth fill her inside when her mom kissed the side of her head as she was carried into the living room.

Finally settled sideways onto her mom's lap, Rachel looked up at Shelby who was looking at her rather sternly. So much so that it made the little girl squirm.

Shelby let out a long breath and looked right into her daughter's eyes, holding her chin gently,

"Before we do anything else, I just want to make sure you know that you can come into my room whenever you want. It doesn't matter if I'm tired, angry at you or you're angry at me, or something else entirely. It doesn't matter. I will be there for you."

"Okay."

The mother wasn't convinced. Nobody would be with that lackluster response.

Shelby held out her pinky, "Pinky promise me that you'll come in when you need me."

"Pinky promise." Rachel finally agreed.

… … ….

The pair was midway through the Jungle Book when Shelby's phone started to ring. Rachel huffed at the sound. Her head was laid on her mom's lap, and she knew if Shelby got up she'd have to move from her comfortable position.

"Rach, I gotta get that honey."

The girl complied and sat up wordlessly, not wanting to miss anything from the film. Rachel was trying to stay focused, but her mother's conversation was proving to be distracting.

 _"Oh, no that's no problem. Have her come over."_

Rachel paused the movie and scooted closer to hear what her mom was saying from the kitchen.

 _"I've been meaning to see if Rachel knew her. It's a good chance for them to spend time together. And we had no plans besides a quiet evening in, so don't you worry about that."_ Shelby assured the mystery caller.

Rachel scrunched her face. Who was her mama talking too? And they most certainly did have plans. Watching a movie, baking some cookies, and starting on Rachel's new book was their plan!

Her thinking was caught off guard by her mother who peeked her head into the living room, "Rach, can you come in here please?".

The girl slid off the couch and walked into the kitchen, masking the unease that she was feeling.

Shelby waited for Rachel to take a seat.

"So, it looks like we've had a change of plans Rach."

 _Well you told that person we had no plans._ Rachel wanted to say, but was wise enough to recognize her thought as a dumb one.

"Oh, umm, what happened?"

"I'm friends with a family that used to live in this neighborhood but they moved almost a year ago. I would take care of their daughter a lot, you might know her. Santana Lopez?"

Rachel's blood ran cold. No. No. No. This could not be happening. It wasn't possible that one of her bullies at school held a place in her mother's heart. Shelby was hers, goddamnit!

"Umm, yeah. Yeah. We don't really talk but I know her."

Shelby smiled warmly, "Well it seems that Sanny's-"

 _SANNY?! No, NO MAMA! Not Sanny! I'm your Rachie. She is just Santana!_

"Sanny's great grandmother ended up in the hospital a ways out of town, and Mrs. Lopez is gonna head over to see her. Mr. Lopez is on call so he can't stay with Santana and so she called me."

Rachel felt like she had frozen solid onto the stool she was sitting on, unbelieving of this turn of events.

"S-so we won't bake the cookies and read my book?"

 _'Really Rach? Everything running through your mind and that's what you say?'_

"We can still bake the cookies, but maybe we can play a board game with Santana instead of the book."

 _'I hate board games.'_

Shelby read the unease in her daughter's demeanor. She stifled a sigh and put a hand on her daughter's knee, "What has you worried, love?"

A lot of things.

 _'That I'll see how much fun you have with Santana, a "normal" kid. That Santana will ruin what we have. That you find out that I'm bullied by a girl you love so much, and I ruin yet another thing about your life. That maybe you actually would rather play board games then read to me._

 _I'm worried that Santana will come into my safe place. Into our house, mama, and call me all the names I'm called at school, and I'll feel worthless, scared, and sad, which are things that I'm always protected from when I'm home with you. Is that gonna end now too?'_

"Nothing, I was just, um, really excited about my new book. And I'm kinda nervous about someone being here that's not family."

Shelby gave her a sympathetic look, "I will read to you tomorrow baby girl. I'll even read you two chapters tomorrow."

Rachel perked up at that thought.

Shelby then grabbed the girl's hands and looked into her eyes, "And don't worry sweetheart Santana is a nice kid. And I'm not leaving you alone, I'll be right here."

 _Santana, a nice kid? Yeah, and pigs can fly mama._

"Yeah, I, I guess." Rachel forced herself to squeak out.

… …. ….

The duo was sitting on the couch finishing up the Jungle Book as they waited for their guest. Although Rachel couldn't focus anymore, her mind kept creating all the horrible scenarios that she could find herself in with Santana in her home. The only thing that kept her from running up into her room to wallow and worry was Shelby playing with her hair in the only way her mother knew how to do it. The way that soothed her.

The bell rang just as Shere Kan the tiger fell into the fire after chasing Mowgli, effectively killing him.

"Perfect timing." Shelby winked at Rachel who returned a half hearted smile, "Can you pause the movie or mute it, bug. I'll get the door."

When Shelby opened the door she was greeted by a stressed Maribel Lopez. She saw Santana grabbing her backpack from the back of her mom's car.

"Oh Shelby thanks so much for doing this."

"Of course. You take as much time as you need. If Santana needs to spend the night that is okay too."

"No, no, that won't be necessary. It'll either be me or her dad picking her up." Maribel told her, "If it's her dad it'll be at 11pm the latest. I hope that's not too late."

"I'll be awake, so it's no issue. Besides, now Rachel and her can finally meet, and spend some time together."

Shelby turned to see if her daughter was in the living room, but the girl wasn't there. She frowned wondering where the girl had gone.

"Oh yes." Maribel ran a hand through her hair, "I forgot to mention that to her."

Shelby chuckled, "It's okay Maribel, really. Now please go. I have it all under control here."

"Shelby!" Santana yelled as she got closer to the doorway. Shelby opened up her arms and the tall 12 year old hugged the woman tight.

"San, it's been forever." Shelby exclaimed, "God, you got taller."

Santana blushed, "I guess so."

Maribel smiled sweetly at the interaction.

"Okay m'hija. Ya me voy. Un besito para mami." (I'm leaving. Give mommy a kiss.)

Santana hugged her mom tight and kissed her cheek, "Bye mami."

"Pórtate bien." (Be good.) The mother warned, not letting her go yet.

Santana rolled her eyes, "I will."

Maribel let her daughter go and sighed, "Alright, I'm off." She gave her daughter a kiss on the cheek, "I love you sweetie."

"I love you too mami."

The woman thanked Shelby one more time before she went back to her car. They watched Maribel leave the driveway and waved at her one last time, before Shelby guided Santana inside the house and closed the door.

Shelby instructed the Latina to put her book bag down and take her shoes off.

"So San-"

"Yeah?" The girl said as she slipped off her black Vans.

"Your mom forgot to tell you that I have a daughter now."

The 12 year old's eyes widened, "You have a baby girl? I didn't even know you were pregnant Shelby!"

Shelby laughed, "God no San. She's actually your age."

The girl tiled her head in confusion. How was that even possible?

"She's living with me now. She was with her fathers before, but now she's here permanently." Shelby clarified. The woman wasn't sure if she wanted to go into all the details right now about how Rachel came to be in her home, but decided the girl needed some context.

Honestly, Santana was still confused but didn't bother to ask any more questions. Her mom would consider that being nosy. But now she was curious as to who Shelby's daughter was. Shelby was the coolest adult ever. She loved staying with her. Her daughter must be a pretty cool girl too.

"You know her actually." Shelby added.

"I do?" The girl's eyebrow rose.

The woman nodded. "She's in sixth grade with you. Rachel Corcoran. You probably know her as Rachel Berry, maybe? Let me go get her."

"Rachel, where are you?" Shelby called as she walked up the stairs.

Santana froze and swallowed hard. This could not be happening.

Suddenly that moment in class when Rachel screamed, "It's Corcoran, not Berry!" After Amanda had called her by her last name, 'Berry' had flooded back. How had she not pieced that together?

Was, was this real? This wasn't real.

"Rach, where are you?" She heard Shelby say again.

"Oh fuck." Santana breathed out.

Yup, it was real.

 _ **I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please let me know what you think. Review!**_


	7. I Sit There

Santana watched as Shelby made her way up the stairs calling out for Rachel. She stood by the railing, trying to eavesdrop into the muffled conversation that she could hear mother and daughter having. When the girl realized that she wasn't going to get to hear much she sighed and plopped herself onto Shelby's living room couch.

She caught sight of Rachel's jacket and shoes that she wore to school by the door. Amanda had poked fun of her "geek shoes" just the other day.

'God, this is so weird.' The Latina thought.

Giving the living room one good look she noticed the new picture frames that Shelby had put up. The largest was atop the mantle. It was Shelby and Rachel at what seemed to be a party. Santana didn't know it but it was Shelby's father's birthday party. The small girl was sitting on a stool and Shelby had her arms wrapped around her from behind, her head was resting on Rachel's shoulder as they both smiled brightly at the camera.

Santana realized that she had never seen Berry that happy since she'd known her.

Shelby looked into her daughter's room but there was no sign of Rachel. She walked back out and saw that the bathroom door was closed. She was about to knock, but Rachel opened it all her own.

"There you are." Shelby sounded relieved, "You disappeared on me kiddo."

"Oh." Rachel looked down at her socked feet, "I'm umm, not feeling too well." She immediately lied.

The woman quirked an eyebrow then walked over, "Do you feel hot?" She put a hand on Rachel's forehead. The girl felt fine.

"No." The girl shook her head.

"Is it your stomach?" Shelby further inquired.

Another shake of the head.

Shelby gave her daughter a knowing look. "Is it the fact that Santana is here?"

Rachel immediately looked up at her mom in shock that she was read so well.

The mother chuckled softly at Rachel's expression. "I'm guessing that's a yes?"

The 11 year old just shrugged. "I don't want to go downstairs. Can't I just stay in my room and ready my book? I wanna read my book."

"Rachel." Shelby sighed, "We have company, and it's rude for you to stay up here."

"Please mom."

"Rachel, why don't you tell me why you are trying to avoid Santana? Is there something going on between you two?

"No." Rachel twisted her fingers, "Nothing's wrong, mom. It's nothing. I just don't want to go downstairs."

Shelby was no fool, but if her daughter wasn't going to open up, then she wasn't going to pander to her, "Well I'm sorry that you don't want to Rachel, but you're not giving me a reason and I won't let you stay up here without legitimacy. Understood? So you are coming downstairs."

Her words were stern and she could see the frustration in her young daughter's facade.

"But-"

"No." Shelby stood her ground, hating that there was something her daughter wasn't telling her. She had a feeling that Rachel was upset because Shelby's full attention wasn't going to be on her, but she didn't want to assume anything.

God, she'd kill to just give into her daughter's puppy dog look, "Let's just take it one step at a time." Shelby finally offered, "Cookies first. And if you still feel really upset we'll talk about it, okay?"

The 11 year old realized that that was as good as it was gonna get, so she reluctantly sighed and agreed to go down with her mother.

And the girl didn't realize it, but Shelby let out a subtle sigh of relief. They went downstairs together. But Rachel's cool was short lived when they got about halfway down the steps and saw that Santana had made herself perfectly at home as she browsed through their Netflix account.

She furrowed her brow and clenched her teeth at the sight. She imagined Santana judging her for her viewing choices. The Latina and her best friend, Amanda, making fun of her for the shows she liked to watch.

"Hi Rachel." Santana said getting up and walking around the couch, "You didn't tell me Shelby was your mom." She tried to act as nonchalant as possible. Although both girls felt the weight of their school dynamics seeping into their interaction now.

Santana looked at Rachel up and down. God, it was so weird for her. Rachel looked even smaller now in a huge New York tshirt. Her hair was down and a little bit messy, and she was wearing sweatpants! This was not the Rachel she was used to seeing.

Rachel shrugged, "I didn't know you knew her." She murmured trying not to look at her bully in the eyes. Shelby eyed the girls carefully. Something was off. Santana was a popular girl. It was easy to tell. Her daughter wasn't. It was probably the reason for the tension.

So the mother clapped her hands once, hoping to end this uncomfortable stand off, "Alright girls, let's make some of those macadamia nut cookies that you like so much Santana. The first batch is already in the oven."

Rachel looked at her mother shocked. She bet her mom didn't even know her favorite type of cookie. She slumped her shoulders and wanted to pull away when her mom took her hand and led both of them into the kitchen, but thought better of it.

"Are we gonna put nutmeg in it, like we used to Shelby?" Santana asked sitting on the barstool at the island as if it was her own home, swiveling around in it. That's what Rachel did on that stool. It was her stool.

Rachel felt her blood run hot. But Shelby didn't seem to care. Her mother was busy getting ingredients out, probably looking for the nutmeg just for dumb Santana.

The small girl took advantage of her mother being preoccupied and tapped Santana on the shoulder, "That's my barstool. I always sit there." She told her rather angrily.

Santana narrowed her eyes. She couldn't understand why Berry was angry. It'd only been like five minutes and she'd done absolutely nothing to her!

"There's like three more chairs." Santana said, "Chill Rachel."

"But I always sit there." Rachel frowned and put a hand on her hip. This was her house, and Shelby was her mom. She wanted to make that very clear.

Santana was going to respond but Shelby beat her to it, "Rach, why don't you sit on the stool right next to her?"

Shelby could tell Rachel was set to argue, wanting to avoid that, she handed Rachel the cookie dough, "Take this and you and Santana can start forming the cookies."

Rachel ignored her mother's directive completely, "Mom, I always sit there. It's my stool."

The other child in the room couldn't help but scoff. God, Rachel was such a baby.

The mother sighed. She wasn't too happy with the resistance by which her daughter was meeting her with.

"I understand you always sit there Rachel, but it won't hurt to sit on another stool." She tried to reason with her.

"Then why can't she move then?" Rachel sassed back, pointing at Santana. This caused Shelby to put her own hand on her hip. Mother and daughter looking scary similar to one another.

"I'm already here dude. Just sit down already." Santana added. The Latina rolled her eyes and mumbled out a 'geez.'

Rachel turned to her and gave her a death glare, "Well you get out of my seat first, then I can sit down."

Shelby was not liking the nasty attitude that had suddenly crept up from her little girl. Yes, she knew Rachel was probably jealous. She knew that her and Santana were most likely not in the same social circles at school, and she knew that her daughter loved routine and breaking it always confused her, but Shelby would not allow for the rudeness.

The mother looked at the clock it was already eight. "Rachel if you're going to be rude, then maybe it's time you go straight to bed."

Rachel saw the smug look on Santana's face when Shelby had said that. How was her mom already taking Santana's side?! This was ridiculous. All of it was!

The girl, out of anger, raised her voice, with an added stomped foot "That's my seat. I just wanna sit right there! Move Santana!"

"I'm not moving." Santana said, rather haughtily.

Rachel felt her whole body tighten, "You're..you, you're so stupid! Just stupid and mean!"

With that the mother had had enough.

"I'll be right back." She told a stunned Santana.

Saying nothing else, Shelby took Rachel upstairs, a firm hand on her daughter's arm.

Santana had never seen Shelby look that upset before. She had that face that her mamí puts on whenever Santana is about to be in huge trouble. But, the Latina had also never seen so much fury in Rachel's eyes. And the stuff Rachel went through at school was way worse then a simple seat being stolen. Santana was equally confused with all of this. Although she wouldn't admit it to anyone, the Latina felt bad for Rachel.

Meanwhile, not wanting to embarrass Rachel, Shelby waited until they were upstairs in Rachel's room to get onto her daughter.

The 11 year old had fought Shelby's grip all the way up, but to no avail.

"Rachel Corcoran stop it, right now!" Shelby said when the door was closed. Her daughter would not stop squirming.

"That's my stool. It's mine!" Rachel exclaimed in frustration.

Shelby put two hands on either of her daughter's shoulders, "Look at me right now." Her voice was sterner than usual, "Stop your tantrum, and look at me."

When Rachel wouldn't, Shelby gave her a quick, but stinging swat that made the girl whimper and throw her hand back from the short sting, but she finally stopped.

"I warned you before." Shelby said at the pout that formed on her daughter's face after the swift spank. Rachel had received a few swats from her mom already but they still made her stop in her tracks. Most recently it was for climbing onto the countertop after having been explicitly told not to and almost slipping off. Fortunately Shelby caught her, but the luck was short lived because she was also sent out of the kitchen with a swat to her backside and a warning to mind her mother's warnings next time.

The girl's pout turned into a scowl as she looked at her mom and rubbed her bottom dramatically, even though the sting was gone the moment it happened.

She couldn't believe her mother was mad at her and not the demon downstairs. Her mother, who knew that Santana loved macadamia cookies with nutmeg. Her mom who loved board games like Santana, and who let her bully sit on her stool.

The look upset Shelby. She was not used to this side of Rachel. She was used to a softer, and meeker version of her. Sure Rachel had thrown a few tantrums already, but she'd never been this defiant afterwards. But at the same time she knew that moments like these were inevitable. It was only a matter of time.

"I understand you're upset and I know you hate when I swat you." The mother began, "But you are not going to treat Santana the way you just did, and you are not going to be so openly defiant after I tell you to do something. That is not how we communicate, honey."

 _What about the way Santana treats me, and communicates with me?!_ Rachel thought.

"You don't act that way without consequences Rachel. Because of that," She stated calmly, "I am going to put you to bed. You are not going to read, or play on your phone. You are getting into your pajamas."

She put a finger up to silence the protest that was on the tip of her daughter's mouth, " _You are getting into your pajamas_." She reiterated, "I'm tucking you in and that's it. I don't care that it's only 8. You lost your privilege of staying up."

Rachel felt an overwhelming amount of emotion. In that moment she felt so unheard and misunderstood.

Shelby watched her daughter's eyes redden and her pout become almost one of deep sadness. God, this was killing her. She couldn't help but soften at her daughter's reaction.

"I know you're feeling a lot of things right now bug." She kneeled down to get to her daughter's level, "Before we get you in bed-"

"I don't wanna go to bed!"

Shelby raised an eyebrow, "It's not up for discussion."

"You don't care that she's sitting in my stool! You don't care! And now I'm in trouble for it!"

"Honey." Shelby sighed and grabbed her daughter's hands, "You are in trouble for the way you yelled at her. Rachel, what is this really about? You know I love you right?" Shelby added, "And you will always hold the most important place in my heart. Santana won't change that."

Rachel pulled her hands back and folded her arms against her chest, "Yeah right." She muttered.

"SHELBY THE COOKIES ARE READY!" Both Rachel and Shelby heard come from down the stairs, "HOW DO I TURN OFF THE OVEN?"

Knowing how impatient Santana could be, and not wanting to deal with the girl accidentally burning herself trying to get the cookies out, Shelby reluctantly pulled herself away from the conversation she was having with Rachel.

There was still anger in her daughter's expressive eyes. "Change into your pajamas Rachel. I'm coming right back up here after I help Santana downstairs." Came Shelby's no nonsense voice.

As she turned to walk out Shelby heard a 'whatever' sassed at her. Shelby took a deep, calming breath. Yelling would only make Rachel close up even more. There was more to this then Rachel being capricious, she just needed to succeed at staying calm.

Shelby turned back to her daughter before she closed the door, "I'll be back up. Don't let your attitude get you into further trouble Rachel. I'm warning you now."

When she reached the kitchen Santana had already gotten the cookies out of the oven. "If you burned yourself doing that, your mother would've had my head."

Santana gave Shelby a cheeky smile, "Good thing I figured it out then."

The woman watched the girl's movements. Santana was so confident in herself. Confident in her abilities. In her place in the world. In the love and security of family and friends. Her daughter though...Rachel...she was just learning these things.

Shelby frowned at such a sad thought, "Hey San, can you get some of the tupperware from the bottom cabinet. I'll put some on a plate for you and you can save the rest."

The girl nodded, but then looked up at Shelby, "Is, umm, is Rachel coming back down?"

Shelby gave her a sad smile, "Not this time, San. She needs some time to herself."

"Oh." Santana frowned. Ewww. Why did she suddenly feel bad for the tiny nerd getting into trouble? This should be a cause for celebration not sympathy!

"I'm sorry for what she said to you."

"She kinda freaked out." Santana added.

Shelby knew to tread lightly. "Rachel likes routine."

"Yeah, I know. She's all about following the rules at school." The girl added.

"And you're not?" Shelby rose an eyebrow at her as the girl handed her the tupperware. Santana just shrugged and bit off a piece of a gooey cookie, "We're just really different. I don't think she really likes me and sometimes she can be kinda, I don't know, just like different from everyone."

Shelby stopped and put the tupperware down, "Santana." She said seriously enough to get the girl to put her cookie down.

"Rachel's only a few months younger than you, but she's been through a lot. Sometimes when people go through really hard things in their life they act a little bit differently. Does that make sense?"

Santana looked away. She knew what Shelby was talking about. Like when her mamí got sick and she started have terrible nightmares at night. The only way to prevent them was if she slept in her parents' bedroom. Her hands holding onto her mamí's blouse for dear life, and her head resting on her mother's chest.

 _Shelby had to take care of her one night because Maribel had to go into the hospital for a scheduled, but unfortunately high risk surgery, although the doctors were optimistic._

 _The 9 year old would not let go of her mother for anything though. Her and Santiago had come into Shelby's house to drop off the girl. Maribel picked her daughter up and held her in her arms but Santana had hooked her legs around her mother's waist and cried into her shoulder, "No mamí, I wanna go with you!"_

" _Sanny, m'hija, you have to stay here. Papi's gonna pick you up tomorrow evening so you can see me." Maribel patted her daughter's back gently._

" _mamí, I don't want you to leave!"_

" _Hey, hey. Shhh." Maribel moved to sit on the couch where she fixed the girl into her lap and started to comfort her worried daughter, "This is gonna help fix mamí, princesa. I'm gonna be okay. Todo va a salir bien. (Everything is going to be okay)"_

" _I wanna stay with you and papi. I don't wanna stay with Shelby."_

" _No baby." Maribel said sadly, "It's better for you to stay here." The mother rocked her daughter and patted her back, "Calm down Sanny. Shhhh."_

 _Santiago took the opportunity to hand Shelby Santana's overnight bag._

" _Thank you so much for this Shelby." The tall man told her._

 _Shelby looked at the tired doctor sympathetically, "Of course. I'm here for you."_

 _He gave her a weak smile, "Ever since she found out about the surgery, three weeks ago, Sanny's been having some bedtime issues." He explained softly, "She gets really embarrassed about it, but her therapist told us that the bedwetting should go away after the stress is gone."_

" _She's a strong girl, Santiago. I'm sure it will, and it's no issue." Shelby's heart went out to the scared child that refused to get off her mother's lap._

 _The father rubbed his neck and looked sadly at his little girl, "She hates wearing the GoodNites, but they help, and they're packed at the bottom of her bag. Can you just check to make sure she has them on at night? And, and can you have her call me before she goes to bed?"_

" _I'll hand her my phone the moment she gets to bed."_

" _Thank you so much."_

 _An hour later a heartbroken Santana was crying softly on Shelby's couch. The woman had put a plate of macadamia nut cookies with nutmeg and a cup of warm milk in front of the girl,_

 _Shelby put a hand on the girl's knee, "San, your mom told me these are your favorite. And she made them especially for you to eat tonight. She left me a note in your bag saying to give them to you and put on your favorite movie."_

" _The-the Lion King?" She said through a hiccup._

 _Shelby smiled, "Yes."_

Now, at almost 12 years old, Santana could only recall that year of her mom being sick through very foggy glasses. She remembered not feeling like herself, feeling sad, and mad all the time. She remembered feeling vulnerable, powerless. She hated that version of Santana. She was so weak. And so the girl worked hard to repress such a painful time in her life. She wondered what sort of hard things Rachel had gone through.

"San?" Shelby asked. The girl had spaced out.

"I-I know what you mean." She finally responded.

"It's important to be mindful of the fact that we don't know what another person is going through."

God, Shelby sure was doing a good job of making her feel like crap. She wouldn't hear the end of it if she ever told Amanda that they should leave Rachel alone. Her friend could be such a bitch sometimes.

"Sorry for calling her weird." She finally mumbled.

Shelby smiled slightly, "Apology accepted."

Maybe it _was_ time to back off of Rachel?

… …. ….

"Rach?" Shelby knocked on the door to her daughter's bedroom.

Downstairs, Santana was now comfortably watching TV with her cookies and some milk. Shelby promised a game of monopoly once she went to check on Rachel. Santana loved to be competitive and board games were a great outlet for that.

Shelby was glad that Santana was at the very least beginning to understand Rachel's actions. Her daughter had her moments where her once love deprived life exemplified itself in ways that could make her seem odd to others. But the mother would be damned if people judged her for it without any retribution.

"Rach, baby?" Shelby opened the door slightly at first, but then completely when no sound was heard. She'd been gone for about twenty minutes, and she wondered if Rachel had fallen asleep.

Once inside she noticed her daughter had her headphones on as she laid on her side, knees curled to her chest with Clifford in her arms. She'd changed into her Mulan t shirt and pink sleeping shorts. A pair of fresh light blue socks on her feet.

The music playing through her earbuds was rather loud. Shelby shook her head and gently took them out of her daughter's ears, startling Rachel in the process.

"You're gonna go deaf listening to music that loud." Shelby attempted at a light joke.

Rachel having had some time to calm down, no longer had fight in her. She just shrugged her shoulders and hugged her stuffed dog tighter.

"Hand me the phone and your headphones." The mother extended her hand, "Just you and your thoughts tonight, young lady."

Rachel rolled her eyes and handed her prized possessions over, hating that Santana was downstairs enjoying herself, meanwhile here she was stuck in her room.

"I know you're mad, and it seems that you're mad at me." Shelby carefully moved a stray hair from her daughter's face.

"You're making me go to bed, and I didn't do anything." Rachel whined. I mean, technically Rachel knew she was being rude, but god, if only her mother knew who Santana was at school whenever she was with Amanda. There was something about Amanda that made Santana mean.

"Love, I'm sorry that you are so upset. I really am, but I'm not sorry for putting you to bed. You are old enough to understand that you were out of line. I do wish though that you'd tell me why you're so adamant about avoiding Santana. I can't help you if I don't know what's really wrong. I can only guess."

Rachel turned over in a huff and pulled the blankets over herself, not wanting her mom to tuck her in. "I don't wanna talk to you about it."

Shelby sat down on the bed with a sigh. This was a far cry from the Rachel that said she'd never be so mad that she wouldn't want to be tucked in and kissed goodnight. "Rach, it's clearly bothering you. I'm not taking no for an answer this time around. If it's not tonight, it will be tomorrow. Do you understand me?"

After a minute of silence, Rachel finally gave in and mumbled out a 'yes.'

The woman rubbed her daughter's back for a few moments, knowing that it comforted Rachel even if she was mad.

And she knew it was working because Rachel turned onto her tummy and hugged Clifford tight, letting the red dog's head tickle her chin, the way she always did when she was being soothed.

The mother smiled softly at the sight, glad that Rachel wasn't denying herself comfort, then gave her a gentle kiss on the side of her head, "I love you Rach. Goodnight sweetheart, I'm always here for you."

... ... ...

Santana was picked up by her father at around 10:45 pm. The girl and Shelby had finished their game of monopoly 20 minutes before. A game that Santana had won. When Santiago got to the door, Santana was on her phone playing a game.

But the knock on the door excited her because she hadn't seen her dad since yesterday. He had been on call and then got stuck performing a long surgery. She jumped from the couch and ran to him when Shelby opened the door.

"Daddy!"

The tall man braced himself knowing she'd jump in his arms. He hugged her tight and let her stay in his arms. "Hi big girl. I missed you." He told her, basking in his daughter's love.

She nodded her head and held him tighter. Santiago could tell that Santana would be subdued and cuddly tonight because he'd been gone and hadn't had a chance to call her since yesterday morning, so he and Santana quickly bid Shelby goodnight and thanked him.

"Come on," Santiago said adjusting Santana in his arms, and giving her bottom a soft pat, "mamí told me you need to take a bath before I put you to bed."

"Can I sleep with you papí?" A tired Santana asked, still so happy that her busy dad would be home, and she wanted to spend all the time she could with him before he went back to work the next day.

The girl was also glad that Rachel was stuck upstairs. It gave her free reign to be her daddy's princesa, and not have to act tough.

Shelby smiled at the interaction. Just like Rachel, Santana melted in her parents' arms. They were still little girls, and they would always be their parents' little girls.

Once they left, Shelby went back upstairs to change for bed. It saddened her to realize though that she and Rachel had been at odds the whole evening. Rachel had gone to bed upset with her, and wanting nothing to do with her.

Jesus, how many times had she done that to her own mother? And said and done things far worse than Rachel. Lord, Shelby was not ready for her daughter to act the way she had.

The mother went into her bedroom, mindful to leave the door open should Rachel decide to come in.

It was coming to be midnight and Shelby still couldn't go to sleep. In frustration, she chucked the covers off of her and went downstairs to make herself some tea. But when she reached the bottom of the stairs, she stopped at the sight of her daughter sitting on the recliner, looking out the window that faced the road outside. Watching the lights, and the occasional car outside.

"Rachel?" Shelby called out in surprise. The girl jumped and then sheepishly looked at her mother.

"What are you doing out of bed?" Shelby went over towards the recliner. Her daughter had been crying.

Shelby noticed that the sheepish look turned into one of sadness as the girl got up to leave, "S-sorry. I-I couldn't sleep."

The girl brushed past her mom and rushed up the stairs. Shelby shook off the confusion and followed her daughter.

She didn't bother knocking this time, "Rachel, did you have a nightmare?"

The girl shook her head, "I'm just gonna go to sleep now. I'm sorry for not staying in bed."

Shelby shook her head, "Does this have to do with Santana?"

The girl frowned, "What does it matter?"

The mother moved and sat down by her daughter, "Of course it matters." Rachel was about to lie down, but Shelby stopped her. "Come sleep with me."

Rachel's eyes widened. She was going to say yes, but her eyes could only water and she shook her head.

That one really surprised Shelby.

"Sweetheart, you are having trouble sleeping, and extremely upset. I need you to get some rest. If you're not coming with me, then I'm staying here."

"You don't have to do that."

"I do."

"Why?" Rachel asked folding her arms across her chest.

"Because you're my daughter and I love you." Shelby answered keeping her calm in the dark room.

"Well you love Santana too." Rachel said mutinously.

Shelby sighed and laid a soft hand on her daughter's cheek, "But she's not my daughter. You hold a special place in my heart, that no one can take away."

Rachel moved away from her mom and laid herself down, hugging her knees to her chest. The only light in the room was that of the moon. "I heard you guys playing monopoly. I hate board games, so you'll never have fun like that with me."

Shelby could hear the jealousy in her daughter's tone, not knowing what else to do she moved to lay next to Rachel. She laid on her side so they could be face to face.

A hurt expression crossed Rachel's face, "I'm-I'm sorry." She said in a small whisper, wishing it was as simple as telling her mom about her issues at school. But it wasn't. It wasn't that easy. There was some part of Rachel that was still afraid of what her mom might think, and it was also downright embarrassing to admit. Yet another way that she was messed up.

"Honey, you don't need to be sorry about your feelings. And you and I have fun in so many different ways. I don't care about Monopoly, love."

Rachel's eyes skidded up to her mother's. Innocent eyes looking at compassionate ones.

"Mom..." Rachel's voice quivered,

Shelby rubbed her daughter's shoulder gently, "Yeah, baby?"

"Mommy...she, she thinks I'm weird." Rachel admitted in a broken voice, "Like a lot of the kids at school."

Even sharing that felt like too much. She looked back away, afraid of what her mom might say next.

Shelby could see the pain in her daughter's eyes. Things were starting to make more sense. Maybe a talk with Santana's parents was going to need to be had.

The frustration she'd felt with Rachel now forgotten.

"Sweetheart-"

"You let her sit where I always sit, and, and she thinks I'm weird. And, and she was here at home with us. And you know all about her." She rattled off.

The 11 year old couldn't understand it, but her mom laying down with her and simply saying nothing except give her a loving look when she admitted to kids thinking she was weird made her feel safer than she'd even felt, "You've known her longer than you've known me."

And without controlling it, her face crumpled and her tears started to fall, "M-mama" Rachel cried, holding her arms out desperately for Shelby to hold her.

It was too hard to tell her mom about the extent of the bullying but even saying that felt like a lot off the tiny girl.

"Oh Rachel." Shelby pulled her in, feeling the child grab onto her blouse, making herself as small she could. The mother kissed the top of her daughter's head, "I love you to death lovebug."

It only took a few moments for the girl to calm back down. She peeked up at her mom who was relaxing her by smoothing her hair over and over again.

"Hi love." Shelby whispered. Rachel blushed and smiled, hiding back in the safe place of her mama's embrace, yawning in the process.

"You're sleepy, aren't you?"

The 11 year old nodded and nuzzled into her mom's chest. A loving move that made the mother's heart soar.

 _'My sweet girl'_ Shelby thought.

Shelby moved them both to get more comfortable, "Alright, you need to sleep and so do I. We'll talk more tomorrow."

Rachel tensed at the thought, but her mom began to sing to her and pat her bottom rhythmically, and with such loving movements there was no way that Rachel could win the battle against sleep.

"Clifford, mama?" Rachel asked right at the brink of sleep.

Shelby searched with her hand and found him for her sleepy girl. Rachel snuggled into the plush softness and sighed contently.

Watching the moment made the mother wish that day would never come. Rachel always looked the most comfortable at night, hugging her beloved dog.

Shelby stayed awake long past having put Rachel to sleep, her head resting on Shelby's chest. The mother replayed her daughter's defeated voice saying how kids thought she was weird. Rachel needed so much reassuring, and all the work they put in at home was being cut down by whatever was happening at school. Things were going to have to change.

 **I know I've been gone forever. Just know I haven't given up on my stories. Your encouragement is always welcome. Please let me know your thoughts on what's happening! And if anyone is wondering I'm planning on Rachel and Santana kindling a friendship at some point!**


	8. Bedtime Routines

"Daddies, are you guys coming for Christmas to see me?" Rachel asked before her phone call with her dads ended.

Leroy hadn't realized it until recently, but his phone calls with Rachel only made him miss the girl more. He truly never seized the opportunity to love and dote on her, and the happiness and joy that the girl gave was something he used to see as annoying, but now tried to bask in as much as he could.

"We're going to try and get off the week before, Rach." Hiram told her as he noticed the frown form on Leroy's face. Hiram nudged him to bring him back from his thoughts.

"We'll do our best Rachel." Leroy added.

Both dads heard the audible sigh come through, "You can't promise?"

Leroy restrained the eye roll. He was a man that would never have patience for children, no matter how much he missed her.

"That's not how our jobs work, Rach." He told her, "I'm sure you know that now, right? You are old enough to understand it."

Rachel played with the hem of her skirt and whirled on her desk chair. "Yes sir. I know. I'm sorry." She kept spinning feeling dizzier and dizzier.

"We know you miss us. And we miss you too, sweetheart." Hiram spoke more kindly, If we don't see you at Christmas, we'll for sure see you in the summer."

Rachel stopped spinning and felt her heart melt. Hiram was the only one that would call her sweetheart, and he would only use it rarely, so whenever he said it, the girl would just beam.

"Alright, Rachel." Leroy started, "Shelby tells us your bedtime's at nine, so we'll let you go so you can get ready for bed."

Rachel wanted to ask for a few more minutes, but she knew it would be no use. Her dads never budged on anything. They weren't like her mom that took into account her feelings when making decisions.

So the 11 year old restrained her whine, "Yeah, okay...bye daddies. I love you."

"We love you too." They both responded before ending the call.

She put the phone on it's charger and laid it on her bedside table. She let herself fall onto her bed and stare at the ceiling fan. She should have been getting into a shower as her mom instructed her to do after her phone call with her dads, but Rachel didn't really feel like it. Her mom was downstairs inputting some grades for the upcoming progress report anyway, so it's not like she would know if she showered. Besides she was kind of sad that her dads couldn't say for sure that they'd be here for Christmas. Her aunt Carrie had mentioned unwittingly to the 11 year old that they might be here, and ever since then Rachel's heart was set on seeing them. And to top it all off, tomorrow was Monday. She'd have to deal with Santana who'd just been in her house that weekend. The girl felt butterflies in her stomach just thinking about it.

She grabbed a book to distract herself, and decided to finish the chapter she was on before she changed into her pajamas. She only had a few pages left anyways.

But those few pages, turned into two more chapters, as the girl completely fell into the story.

At around 9:15 Shelby went upstairs to tuck her daughter in and give her a kiss goodnight, but was met with a room that hadn't been cleaned up, and an unbathed daughter.

The mother crossed her arms across her chest and cleared her throat, "Ahem."

Rachel jumped a bit, dropping her book. She cursed to herself when she saw the look on her mom's face.

"H-hi mom." She mustered up a smile as she sat up and let her legs dangle from the end of her bed.

"Little miss, why aren't you ready for bed? And you didn't clean up your room either."

Hiram had texted Shelby when they hung up with their daughter, so the mother knew that Rachel had plenty of time to do such things.

"Oh, I-, ummm-" Damn it. Why couldn't she come up with an excuse? She needed to get better at this.

"This is the third time Rachel, in a week might I add, that you don't get ready for bed on your own."

Rachel's eyes glided up to meet her mother's. She hated when Shelby got stern with her, it always made her squirmy. And it's not like her room needed to be cleaned today. The world wouldn't end if she woke up with a dirty room.

She hooked and unhooked her legs as her mom waited for her to respond, "I started reading, and then, I just...forgot."

 _Lame Rachel. LAME!_

Shelby shook her head in frustration, "Come on, you're taking a quick shower and then straight to bed. It's already past your bedtime. You can clean up your room tomorrow when we get home."

The mother decided that Rachel would need to lose some independence so she wouldn't take advantage of it next time. Her girl tended to be up in the clouds a lot, and sometimes it affected her in more ways than one.

Rachel stood up and grabbed her pajamas before following her mom into the restroom, where Shelby had already started the shower for her.

"Mom I could've done it myself." Rachel murmured, walking towards her.

"Well I trusted you to do it yourself babe" Shelby said as she gently zipped Rachel's skirt off for her because it was the skirt who's zipper always got stuck whenever Rachel tried to undo it,

"But I came upstairs and it's clear you didn't do so." The mother finished off.

The skirt pooled at the girl's feet, while she slid the light blue collared shirt off her head.

Shelby checked the water to see if it had warmed up, "For this week I'm starting your shower for you to make sure you actually get in. And I'll be waiting in your room when you come out. Bedtime'll be at 8 and not 9.

Rachel stood only in her cotton polkadot undies, indignant at the seemingly left field punishment "Mom! But that's-that-I mean, I can do it myself!"

Shelby sighed at her daughter's incredulous face, "Just for this week. Your bedtime routine will go back to normal afterwards, but if I see that you can't get ready for bed on your own love, then maybe 8 pm and me supervising will become a more permanent thing."

Of course Shelby was bluffing. She couldn't imagine having to put her daughter to bed that early for more than a short time as a consequence, and the mother knew that her daughter needed her time to feel like she had privacy.

Normally Rachel loved being close with her mom, and never minded her mom helping her. She had a problem with the fact that it felt like she had no choice. Which...she didn't. It was a punishment after all.

Rachel frowned and felt herself getting mad. First her dads, and now this.

"Rach, the water's running. Hop in sweetheart."

The mother stopped herself from rolling her eyes. Of course Rachel would try to be obstinate when dressed only in her undies. A cute sight, if Shelby had ever seen one, but the mother could tell Rachel was upset and once she put her to bed, Shelby knew that she would lay with Rachel for a bit and talk it out.

The mother let out a silent sigh of relief, when the girl did as she was told without argument, although there was a frown on her face.

Shelby grabbed a hold of her daughter's arm, waiting to get eye contact, and when she did she pressed a kiss on her cranky girl's head, then let go.

She closed the shower curtain and went out of the bathroom, giving Rachel some privacy to stew in her thoughts.

When Rachel came back into her bedroom her mom was sitting on her desk chair, absentmindedly looking through her phone. When she heard Rachel come in, she put it down and looked up at her now squeaky clean daughter.

Rachel had chosen one of Shelby's old college tshirts, which had unofficially moved from Shelby's closet and into Rachel's as her sleepwear.

"Did you get your teeth brushed too?"

"Yes ma'am." Rachel murmured.

Shelby smiled softly at her forlorn daughter. Usually, Rachel didn't linger in her unhappiness after a punishment the way she was now and the woman wondered if maybe there was more she was upset about.

Shelby was yet to ask her about her phone call with Leroy and Hiram.

Oh shit.

 _Leroy and Hiram!_

She had gotten so swept up with Rachel not doing as she was told that she'd completely forgotten to check in with her about the call.

See, it was usually a free for all when it came to how Rachel was feeling after a call with her father's. Sometimes the girl was alright, other times happy, and occasionally she ended the call upset.

 _God, Shelby, you idiot._

"Lovebug, did everything go okay between your dads?" Shelby asked when Rachel got into bed.

The girl curled into herself and hugged her red dog, "They said that they don't know if they're coming for Christmas." The 11 year old gave out a deep sigh and her chocolate eyes met caring and empathetic green ones, "Do you think they'll really try to get work off, or do they just say that to make me think they're trying?"

 _Damnit. How did you almost forget to ask her about this?_

Shelby moved closer and patted her lap, Rachel easily laid her head onto it, knowing that her mom would not only comfort her emotionally, but also physically.

"I think your dads struggle to prioritize the things they love. But even if they can't make it, they do love you very much Rachel."

The girl stayed quiet. She didn't feel like talking about it anymore, and the next day was looming over her. Ugh, Mondays were the worst.

After a weekend of relaxation, fun, and peaceful cuddly moments with her mom, Rachel would always feel whiplash with the cold welcoming that middle school always gave her. The laughs and insults were sure to come, and the feeling of just being a nuisance or a weirdo was always what came from going back to school.

Shelby looked down at her daughter as she hummed softly, hoping it would lull her to sleep, but Rachel didn't seem to be moved from her thoughts.

"Do I hafta go to school tomorrow?"

"Yeah bug, you do." The mother gave her bum two soft pats when she noticed her daughter tensing at the thought of school. Her mind went back to Santana's visit.

She hadn't told her daughter, but she already had a conversation with Santana's mother that day. She didn't have any plausible evidence for the school to go off of, but she was also aware that too many times kids had to silently suffer through bullying because no one said nothing, and it pained her to think that her daughter was one of those children.

"Can't I stay home just this once?"

 _That's it._

Shelby hooked her arms around her daughter and pulled her into her lap, so Rachel was looking at her, but the girl hid into her mom's bosom.

 _Sorry bug. We're talking about it._

"Rach, can you look at me?" The mother asked, gently placing her hand underneath her daughter's shirt to rub the girl's back.

"It's just me honey. You know I won't judge you for anything, right? It's a promise I made you."

Rachel thought about it for a moment. Her mom had told as much, it was just hard to believe it. But if there was anyone in the world that Rachel trusted the most, it was her mom. Slowly, the girl's face peeked through.

"What has you so worried, love?" Shelby asked.

Rachel shrugged and hugged Clifford tighter, placing his fur near her nose, effectively muffling her voice, but her mom gently brought the stuffed dog away from her lips, and gave her a gentle, "You're okay."

"I, I'm gonna feel weird" Rachel finally spoke, " Seeing Santana after she was here and saw me get in trouble. What if she tells her friends?"

A few days ago Shelby would've balked at the idea of Santana ever doing such a mean spirited thing, but after her daughter's tearful confession of the way Santana and her friends always called her "weird," she couldn't quite say 'of course she wouldn't do that.'

"How about we make a deal?"

This piqued the girl's interest, her eyes shining curiously despite her tired meekness.

"Like what?"

"In the case that Santana does tell her friends, which I don't think she will, but if that happens, you text me and I'll come get you."

Rachel gave her mother a suspicious look, "But you're teaching."

"Don't worry about me. You text me and I'll figure it out."

The 11 year old sighed softly and played with the string on Shelby's maroon hoodie that she wore around the house.

"Do I really have to go to bed early this whole week? I won't forget to get ready for bed anymore. Promise."

 _Sneaky little one._

"Sorry Rach, but you earned that consequence. I warned you twice before about it. That is one too many, I think."

"But-"

"Rachel." Shelby warned her.

"Fine." The girl mumbled out. She was going to move away from her mother out of spite, but Shelby wasn't ready to let go of her moody little one just yet.

"Bug, I'm going to sing to you, okay? You close your eyes and relax."

Rachel narrowed her eyes. No fair! Her mom knows that she can't stay mad like that. Regardless though, she eased back in and let her mom begin to sing and melt her worry and any upset feelings away. Because if Rachel was honest with herself being in Shelby's arms is exactly what she wanted all day but her mom had been busy with work so she spent the day with her cousin Lindsay and uncle Jack.

Rachel had finally fallen asleep half an hour later, so Shelby slipped out from under the girl and placed her on her tummy, the way Rachel liked to sleep.

The mother watched her child for a moment before whispering 'goodnight.'

… …. ….

"It was 7:30 am and Rachel was sitting in her mom's car, dreading having to get off and enter the building. Usually it wasn't this bad, and she hated the pit feeling in her stomach that she somehow couldn't shake.

The morning had been a bit rocky between mom and daughter. Shelby struggled to get the girl moving and was hurrying her along the whole way. This only disgruntled her already cranky preteen, but the woman remembered being that age and she understood that sometimes mornings were hard, so she tried not to get onto her kid about it too much, even though her mind went to the countless smacks her own mother gave her across the bottom on those hard mornings. Even though they got a cranky Shelby moving, she didn't think it would be beneficial to her own daughter.

"Rach?" Shelby asked once she got to the drop off zone and her daughter didn't move a muscle.

"Oh, sorry." The girl said just as a honk from behind came.

"Don't get off." Shelby told her and quickly moved from the drop off zone and found a parking spot.

"Rachel, honey." She began and gently moved her daughter's chin so they were looking at each other.

"S-sorry for making you wait. I-I'll go."

"Rachel, don't you dare get out of this car." Shelby's stern voice stopped her from opening up the car door.

"You've been out of sorts this whole morning. Are you still nervous about Santana and her friends?"

Rachel looked at her hands sheepishly and shrugged, "I-I don't know."

"I think you do know, babe." The mother pushed, one eye on the clock, and another on her daughter, knowing that she didn't want to make herself late for work, but she was the one that made the split second decision to keep her daughter in the car, so she'd just have to deal with the consequences later, "I'm worried about you."

The girl hated that she was burdening her mother. She hadn't realized that her emotions were affecting her mom until now...what if that made her mom get tired of her? She needed to do some damage control.

"...Usually I'm fine." Rachel looked down and played with her backpack's zipper, "Kurt and I meet up by our lockers and I'm okay, but I don't know, I guess, I'm just starting to hate being the weird one. I wanna be normal, mom."

Shelby felt her heart thud. Rachel caught sight of Kurt getting dropped off and before her mother could say anything else she quickly lunged her backpack around her. This was her chance to enter school with her friend! "Kurt's here! can I go now mama?"

"Honey-"

"I'll be okay." Rachel assured, suddenly feeling better now that Kurt was in sight, and she needed to go with him before she psyched herself out again.

Shelby begrudgingly gave in, "Okay, give me a hug then."

With her daughter's hasty and sudden need to get out of the car Shelby expected a quick hug, but skinny arms wrapped around her neck and held her tightly, "Bye mama." Rachel whispered.

Shelby pulled away and put her hands on Rachel's cheeks, taking in the adorable sight that was her daughter. Rachel was wearing a pink striped collared shirt and a black skirt, her feet in brand new Keds that her mom bought her. Nothing that any of the popular girls would be caught dead in, but it was perfectly Rachel, and Shelby loved that originality about her daughter.

"Go with Kurt. I love you pretty girl."

Rachel nodded and felt her mother give her one last kiss to the forehead. She got out of the car and turned back around to give a final wave. God, she hated the feeling of wanting to run back into her mom's car.

Here she was, 11 years old, feeling tears sting her eyes because her mommy was leaving her for work.

 _Get it together, Rachel!_

"Rachel! Hey!" Puck called after her once the girl had entered the school hallways. The girl recognized the boy's voice and rolled her eyes when she saw his clear faux hawk. Of course, it'd be him and not Kurt that she saw first. But, at least Puck was nice to her.

"Yes, Puck?"

He raises his hands in mock surrender, "What no hello? I just wanted to see how your weekend was. Santana said she was at your place." He stopped talking when he got a good look at Rachel, "Were you crying?"

The 11 year old quickly wiped her eyes, "It's nothing. Allergies."

Puck raised an eyebrow, but Rachel quickly changed the subject, "She told you?"

Puck put a hand on his hip and pretended to flip her hair, then put on the best girl voice he could muster up, " _I was at manhand's house this weekend. It was so weird."_

"She told you?! Who else did she tell?"

The boy shrugged and put his arm around her as they walked towards her locker, Rachel tried not to cringe at Puck's annoying need to be so close to her.

"Just me. Amanda was coming so she told me to shut up and get lost when I tried to ask more questions. So what happened, why was San even at your place? You two can't stand each other."

Rachel avoided answering the question honestly, she really didn't want to talk about it,

"I don't know, and it's none of your business anyway." She pushed his arm off her and smiled with relief when she saw Kurt waiting by their locker.

"Rach, where have you been?" Kurt asked annoyed, "I've been waiting for you so we can get to choir and warm up before anyone else does!"

"I was holding her hostage, your royal gayness." Puck interrupted.

Rachel punched Puck hard, "Puck, if you are going to be rude, then leave me and Kurt alone!"

But Kurt did not seem fazed, "Listen Puck, I understand the future is grim for you, but it doesn't mean you have to take it out on me." He grabbed Rachel's hand, "Come on Rach, we have better things to attend to."

"Weirdos!" The boy called out as they walked, "Bye Rachel! See you around!"

As Kurt and Rachel walked to the choir room they passed by Santana and Amanda. Rachel felt herself tense and it seemed that Santana did the same when they both locked eyes, but they looked away from one another, hoping to avoid any sort of confrontation.

"Oh look, it's the two losers." Amanda stopped them.

 _Shit_ , was the word that came to both girls' minds.

"Back off Amanda. We've done nothing to you." Kurt spoke unfazed by the remark.

"Except be in our space, mr. and mrs. geek." The blonde spit.

Santana nudged Amanda, "Let's just go. Leave them alone."

And the world stopped for everyone included.

Amanda looked at Santana suspiciously.

"What?" Santana bit at her friend, "I just wanna keep walking. You always have something to say about someone, and sometimes I don't. So can we go?"

Amanda scoffed and huffed away. The Latina looked at the two outcasts who were stunned at the rebellion in the ranks of their enemies.

"What're you guys looking at? Walk away!" She barked, making Kurt jump a bit and pull Rachel away from the scene as quickly as possible.

Rachel walked into the choir room in a daze. Santana had avoided saying anything mean about her and it seemed that despite Amanda's typical rudeness, Santana hadn't told her anything about their evening together.

"My two favorite students." Mr. Hunt, the choir teacher called out from his desk, when Rachel and Kurt walked in, "What're you up to?"

"Well Satan's daughter may just have protected us, and we are currently in shock." The boy answered in his typical flamboyant way.

Mr. Hunt looked to Rachel, "Rachel, you're going to have to explain this one to me." He replied with a chuckle.

The girl shook her head in disbelief as well, "Santana told Amanda to leave us alone. It felt unreal. I think time may have stopped.."

"Well then pigs may fly today kiddos." Mr. Hunt responded lightheartedly.

The bell rang and an audible groan came from Kurt, "Ugh, now we didn't get to warm up. See Rachel, where the hell were you…." The girl tuned out her friend as they took a seat. She was trying to think of why Santana would've decided to do that, you know, be nice to her, like actually nice to her.

She had been so sure that the Latina would've taken full advantage of the ammo she got while at her house to make Rachel's life a living hell, but it seemed that wasn't the case.

A few elbow nudges from Kurt brought Rachel back into the present though. Mr. Hunt was passing out the new song they'd be learning.

"Alright everyone, I will count you off and you'll move with the group of people that have the same number as you."

Kurt got 3 and Rachel was 1. Damn. They wouldn't be together, but at least Quinn was a 1 too, and even though they never talked outside of class, the blonde was kind to her during choir class.

"Hey Rach." Quinn said with a sincere smile as the others in the group started to join them, "How was your weekend?"

"Umm, it was okay. I hung out with my cousins on Sunday and my mom on Saturday."

 _Well that was lame._ Rachel told herself after hearing what came out of her mouth.

"That sounds cool."Quinn answered.

Honestly, the girl thought it was awesome that Rachel hung out with her mom. Quinn's parents were never really around.

"What'd you do?" Rachel asked.

"I slept over at Amanda's on Friday, then at Santana's yesterday."

"Oh, that, umm, sounds like a lot of fun."

Rachel always felt self conscious talking to Quinn, but at the same time she loved that Quinn gave her the time of day during choir class.

"San told me she stayed at your place Saturday."

 _Oh God. Here we go._ Rachel thought.

"Yeah, she said you were up in your room most of the time, so it was like old times with Ms. Corcoran and her downstairs."

"O-oh. That's all she said?"

Quinn shrugged and took the rubric one of the other members handed to her, "Pretty much."

"Rachel, are you gonna take the lead on this, since you're like the whiz at everything or what?" One of the girls interupted.

"Right, yeah." Rachel replied, looking over the rubric, forcing herself back into school mode, trying to ignore the nagging question of whether or not she had misjudged Santana Lopez.

But what Rachel didn't know was that Santana and Maribel Lopez had a long talk together after Shelby visited their home to voice her concerns about Rachel.

… …. ….

" _Santana!" Mrs. Lopez called from downstairs, "Can you come down here please!"_

 _When no answer came, the mother huffed up the stairs and opened her daughter's door without knocking. Privacy was a privilege in the Lopez household, especially when Maribel Lopez was on a mission for the truth._

" _Mami, I'm changing!" Santana groaned embarrassed as she pulled a burgundy shirt over her head, "Why can't you knock? I knock when I go into your room!"_

 _Her preteen attitude did not sit well with the mother. Maribel took her daughter's arm and gave her thinly covered bum two swift spanks that made the girl yelp in surprise, "Ow! Mami, Stop!"_

 _Maribel let her stunned daughter go, a hand immediately on her hip,_

" _Don't back talk to me Santana. You were already warned last night by papi."_

"Okay, sorry _!" The girl looked at her mother guiltily as she rubbed her pantied bottom. Her mami's hand was heavy and definitely hurt. If any more had come down on her bottom she for sure would've started tearing up._

 _Geez, usually her mom had more patience than that!_

 _Maribel took a deep breath. She could not let her emotions take the best of her. Santana deserved an explanation and not her coming in guns blaring._

" _I just got off the phone with Shelby." The mother started, waving the phone in her hand before taking a seat onto her daughter's bed._

 _Santana felt her heart beat quicker as she sat down on the bed at her mother's behest._

" _Look at me m'hija." Maribel said sternly._

 _Santana gulped. What could Shelby have told her? Was it the fact that her and Rachel got into a small scuffle about the dumb stool?_

 _She stuck out her lip sadly and looked up at her mom, "Mami, I was good at Shelby's house. I promise."_

" _I know you were. She assured me that was the case, although she mentioned that you and Rachel went back and forth about sitting on a stool."_

 _Santana instantly went to defend herself, "I was sitting there first! Rachel was the one that was being mean and telling me to get off. It was just a dumb chair."_

" _Santana, calm down. I am not upset about that, but I am concerned about something that Shelby mentioned. Y m'hija tienes que ser honesta conmigo. Me entiendes?" (You have to be honest with me. Understand?)_

 _Oh shit. Her mom broke out the Spanish. There were specific occasions when Maribel did that with Santana, it was either when they were cuddling, or when she meant business. Santana was pretty sure the woman meant business._

" _Y-yes I get it." Santana squeaked under her mother's hawk like eyes._

" _Shelby explained that Rachel's been having some anxiety about going to school because of the way kids treat her."_

 _Shit. Fuck. Shit._

 _Santana nodded, trying not to show her mother that she was freaking out inside. If her mom found out about everything she'd done at school, her ass would be done for._

" _Something about kids calling her weird. Rachel told her mother you've called her weird before. Is that true?"_

 _And the 11 year old despite being much more developed than Rachel still felt small under her mother's questioning looks. She hadn't been scolded yet, but knowing her mother would be dismayed with her honest answer made the girl's eyes begin to teem with tears._

 _Maribel Lopez didn't need a verbal answer any longer. Her daughter's tears and guilt ridden face said it all. She'd do anything to be able to pull Santana onto her lap and rock her, but Maribel needed to make her point clear._

" _Santana Lopez, be honest with me."_

 _The Latina preteen could only nod, "I-I...yeah."_

 _Maribel took a deep breath as she looked at her child, "...I'm disappointed in you." Her voice sincere and gentle, but it pierced just as much._

 _She looked at her daughter wipe at her tears. Santana was struggling to keep it together._

 _"Is it that Amanda girl?" Maribel asked after some moments of watching Santana cry to herself, "I've warned you and Quinn about her. She is rude, and your father and I did not raise you to be rude like that."_

" _But mami-"_

" _It is a yes or no question. Did you start calling Rachel names because of Amanda?"_

 _Santana was torn. She knew Amanda was mean, but the girl was nice to her, and when her mom was sick in the hospital Amanda was the one that pushed the kid who was being mean to her for sitting alone during recess._

" _It's not Amanda, it's just that Rachel **is** weird!" Santana answered, "She's always doing things that are different and annoying and sometimes it's hard not to call her out on it. She's little miss perfect mami!"_

 _Maribel sighed, "Santana, everyone is different, and it is how we tolerate those differences that make us people of good character. Do you think I like all the people I work with?"_

" _N-no." Santana shook her head and sniffled. She brought her shirt up to clean her nose, a habit that Mrs. Lopez could never break, "You don't like Mrs. Winchester."_

 _The woman held in a smile, "That's right. But I am never mean to her. I am nothing but courteous. And do you wanna know why I try my best to be nice to her?"_

 _Santana looked up at her mom curiously._

" _Because I don't know the battle she's fighting. Everyone is struggling with something, and Rachel might have her own issues to deal with. How do you think it makes her feel to be called names?"_

 _Maribel noticed her girl hardening, trying hard not to accept that her mother was in the right._

" _Santana." She did not speak harshly, "What if someone made fun of you while I was sick m'hija. Remember how hard it was for you? How much different you acted then?"_

 _Santana's head shot up angrily at her mom. Why would she even bring that up?!_

" _You wouldn't have liked that, right?"_

" _No." Santana finally said._

 _The mother could tell she hit a sore spot, "Rachel's also going through her own problems. And I expect you to at least tolerate her. I'm not asking you to be her friend, I'm asking you to respect her as a person just like you. Is that understood?"_

" _Yes mom." Santana answered dutifully._

" _Let me be clear though, If I find out that you are bullying that little girl Santana, so help me you will lose all privileges, and you'll get my wooden spoon to your bare bottom."_

 _Santana shrunk at the warning, then nodded her head hurriedly in understanding. Her mom had always threatened her with the spoon and had only gotten a few stinging swats here and there. But those few spanks were enough for her to know that she never wanted to be spanked with Mami's spoon._

" _I love you Santana, and I want you to be the best version of yourself every day in school. I know it's hard sometimes, but it's worth it in the end."_

" _Si mami." The girl said._

 _Maribel gave her a small smile and whispered "come here," opening her arms. Santana unabashedly moved to hug her mom tight. She always needed to hug her parents after a scolding it made her feel forgiven, and her parents always offered her that love._

" _Mi bebita preciosa (my precious baby)" Maribel cooed as Santana rubbed her cheek against her mother's soft shirt._

 _After a few moments Maribel stood up and grabbed the pants that Santana was going to wear for the day and offered them to her girl, an offering of peace, letting her know that once downstairs they'd continue on with their day, "Finish changing princesa, we're going to pick up Quinnie after breakfast, okay?"_

… _. …. …._

By lunchtime on Monday Rachel felt a little bit better. Santana hadn't told anyone about her time over, and even though she didn't expect Santana to ever defend her again, or stop Amanda from saying mean things, maybe, just maybe she might stop doing the same as Amanda.

The 11 year old was putting her books in her locker. She closed it and grabbed her phone out of her pocket, distracted she bumped into someone.

"Hey! Watch it!" The voice came, snapping at Rachel, before it even had a chance to check who it was.

Sure enough. It was Santana and Quinn.

"Oh, umm, sorry." Rachel apologized uncomfortably.

"It's fine." Quinn murmured, while Santana frowned.

"Santana." Rachel called out, making both girls stop.

The tall Latina turned around, along with Quinn.

"What do you want?"

"Oh." _Well now you have to talk you dummy,_ "I, umm, was just going to say thank you for stopping Amanda this morning."

Quinn smirked, kind of happy that her friend stood up to the bitch in their friend group.

"Yeah, well don't expect it to be a normal thing." The Latina quipped haughtily, although her mother's warnings rang clear in her mind.

Rachel shrugged, coming off more confident than she felt. "I didn't expect it. I just want to give credit where credit is due, and today it's yours.."

Santana looked at her confused, "Why do you always do that?" She looked back to the amused Quinn, "Why does she always do that?" Then back to Rachel, "Could you not speak geek for a second man hands. What are you saying?"

Rachel shrugged, "Just...thanks."

The Latina rolled her eyes, "Whatever. You're welcome, are we cool now? Can we go back to avoiding each other?"

Rachel felt a twinge of sadness. She wasn't expecting friendship or anything. But still, it sucked that it felt like she could never be friends with people like the two girls in front of her. She'd always be an outcast.

"Rachel, the choir room is empty. Let's go in there!" Came Kurt's voice from down the hallway.

"That's our cue San. Let's go." Quinn spoke, "See ya around Rachel."

The small 11 year old sighed and murmured out a 'see you around.' as the two girls walked away. Luckily, she didn't get too far in her head because she felt herself abruptly pulled by the arm by no other than Kurt.

"Let's go Rach!"

At least she could forever trust her best friend Kurt Hummel.

…. …. ….

Her day was pretty uneventful past her run ins with Santana after that. She'd taken a few tests but that was it. After school, Rachel went to her Aunt Carrie's house, where the girl ended up doing homework with her oldest cousin Ron.

The junior had unfortunately been grounded and was now stuck with his 11 year old cousin. He didn't mind Rachel, but he would've much preferred to have been hanging out with his friends then working on algebra 2, and talking about middle school drama.

Although he really wanted to beat up that Puck kid. Based off Rachel's stories he definitely liked her in that weird preteen way and it gave the cousin all of the older brother protective feelings.

Around 7:30 pm, a knock came at the door that made Ron look up. Rachel looked at the clock and knew that it was for sure her mom. She bolted up from the kitchen table, spilling some of her cousin's papers onto the floor.

The whole week she was going to be picked up later than usual by her mom because Shelby's glee club was in preparation mode for their competition. It'd been some time since Rachel had been picked up that late so she was missing her mom's presence.

"Damn it, Rachel! Slow the fuck down!" Ron called out to her.

Even with Rachel's haste, Lindsay who was already on the couch beat her to get the door.

"Hey Ms. Corcora-"

"Mom!" Shelby heard Rachel yell excitedly from across the room, cutting Lindsay off completely. Shelby smiled, happy to see that her girl didn't seem to have had a bad day. It had honestly worried the mother throughout the day. She would've been lying if she said that it didn't preoccupy her mind during Glee practice.

Lindsay rolled her eyes, then grabbed Rachel by the waist preventing her from going towards Shelby. "Chill, squirt." She chided her.

Rachel huffed as she tried to move away from her cousin's grasp, "Let me go, Linnie!"

Meanwhile, Shelby watched in amusement. It seemed Lindsay was enjoying frustrating her daughter.

"Or what Rach?" Lindsay mocked playfully, "Ms. Corcoran I think Rach is good here. You can leave without her."

"Let. Me. GO!" Rachel knew exactly how to get out of the grip, she began to tickle her cousin's sides making her yelp and finally let go. "Hah!" Rachel said triumphantly before turning back quickly and giving her mom a proper hug, "Hi mom."

The mother kissed the side of her daughter's head and hugged her tight.

"Did you have a good day, baby?"

Rachel breathed in her mother's scent and nodded. The girl didn't let go of her mom until Carrie walked in.

"I thought I heard the door." Carrie said, putting an arm around her own daughter and giving her a kiss that made Lindsay blush slightly, Rachel only smirked at her older cousin because she knew how much Lindsay actually loved Carrie's affections, no matter how much the teenager tried to hide it.

"Thanks again Carrie. Anything to report?" Shelby said placing a hand on top of her girl's head, "I hope my little one was just fine today."

It was Lindsay's turn to stick her tongue out at Rachel.

"Rach was perfect" She told the mother. "She kept Ron company."

Lindsay scoffed, "More like annoyed him to death." It earned her a light slap on her arm from her mother, only making Lindsay smirk cheekily at her mom.

"I did not annoy him!"

Ron came out from the kitchen just as Rachel had finished her declaration, "Don't worry Rach. Linnie annoys me just as much." He said coming to her defense.

Lindsay scowled at her brother and forced herself not to flip him off in front of her mom. "Shut up dude."

The boy ignored her and gave his cousin a hug, "Bye Rach." Then bent down and whispered in her ear, "Watch out for that Puck kid."

Rachel rolled her eyes and smiled out an 'okay, I will.'

The girl waved goodbye and asked her aunt Carrie to give her uncle Larry a big hug and a kiss on the cheek from her when he came back from work.

"So nothing happened at school today between you and Santana?" Shelby asked once they pulled out of the driveway.

 _Santana was actually nice to me. For like a second._ The girl thought. She shook her head slowly at her mom, "No, nothing happened."

 _Thank God._ Shelby thought. "Good...I do want you to tell me if something happens though, baby. That's what I'm here for."

The girl gave her mother a small nod and curled into herself, feeling sleepy but content.

Shelby hummed softly to the music in her car, enjoying the serenity of having her daughter's evened breathing and the calm tunes as her companions. Once in the driveway Shelby gently shook her daughter, wondering why the girl was so tired. Usually she would talk the whole car ride home.

"Rachel, we're home honey."

"Mmmm. Already?" Came a mumble from the curled up preteen.

The mother moved out of the front seat and opened the backdoor on Rachel's side, "Are you feeling okay kiddo?" She asked putting a hand on the girl's forehead.

She only shrugged and let her mom gently handle her out of the car. Rachel didn't feel hot to the touch, maybe it was just a long day at school. Shelby knew that the girl had two tests that day.

The mother put an arm around the girl, "Alright let's get you inside."

"I'm waking up now...I think." Rachel said, trying to shake it off. Shelby chuckled, "Sweetheart, it's okay if you're tired." She let her go and fumbled with the lock and her keys.

"But it's still early." Rachel whined. A move that made it abundantly clear to Shelby that her daughter needed to rest as she was acting fussy.

Shelby opened the door and let Rachel walk in first, "It's almost 8pm, remember you have an early bedtime this week."

Rachel hung her shoulders, "But mom! Can't we watch tv, please?"

 _Now she's awake._ Shelby thinks.

"Sorry Rachel. But you know there are consequences to your actions. It is just for this week."

"But I'm not tired anymore." She continued.

The mother sighed as she put her things down, "That may be the case, but you are still going upstairs to get ready for bed and to clean it up. We agreed you'd do it today."

"8 is too early." Rachel whined with a foot stomp, "And I don't wanna clean up my room, mom!"

"Rachel." Her voice sterner, "I'm not arguing about it. Get upstairs."

The woman put a hand on her hip and pointed up the steps when it seemed Rachel wouldn't moved, "Or we can extend your early bedtime for next week as well."

"No!"

"Then march your butt upstairs right now."

Rachel finally went with grumbles of 'so mean' and 'no fair', leaving Shelby to shake her head at the dramatics she just witnessed. Rachel was definitely her child.

She remembered her mother warning her that the more comfortable Rachel became with her the most her attitude would rear itself.

' _How do you know that?'_

' _Because you were a little drama queen at that age.' The mom half joked._

 _Shelby scoffed indignantly, 'Not true!'_

' _Let's take it to a vote with your brother and sister. I think they might agree with me.'_

 _Shelby blushed and rolled her eyes. So maybe her mom wasn't necessarily wrong._

The mother gave Rachel some time to finish getting ready for bed before making her way up to wish her goodnight.

By 8:45 Shelby went upstairs and into her daughter's bedroom. Rachel still left her room door open for the most part, which made the mother happy because there was a sense of innocence to the fact that Rachel wasn't yet at the stage where she felt like she needed that adolescent privacy all the time.

When Shelby came in Rachel was sprawled out at the center of her bed, in her mom's old college t shirt, hugging her Clifford and staring at the moving ceiling fan. If she was honest with herself she was definitely feeling tired again, but wouldn't dare admit that to her mom. No way!

"Thanks for cleaning up." The mother walked over, "All ready for bed?"

"I guess so." Rachel sighed unhappily.

Was this going to be the deal every night? God, Shelby hoped not. She directed her to get under the covers while she turned off the lights. Shelby sat by her and played with her daughter's hair.

"It's okay if you're upset about going to bed this early." Shelby started softly, "Just watch how you talk when you get mad. I don't want your attitude getting you into trouble."

Rachel blushed. "I-I know."

The girl smiled slightly, loving the feeling of her mom's gentle hand running through her hair.

"You know...my daddies never punished me like you."

"What do you mean?"

"They'd lock me in my room when they'd get mad at me, and then they just wouldn't talk to me. I didn't know when we were supposed to be okay again. I hated it."

"We work a little differently here in our house then, don't we?" Shelby mused softly, hoping to not show how much hearing that upset her.

"Yeah." Rachel sighed.

"Baby, I give your consequences because I love you and I want you to be the best person you can be. Punishing you isn't meant to be out of spite and anger. Do you know that?"

Rachel only responded by pulling herself closer into her mom and asking for one request, "Can you sing to me?"

"Before I do, can you tell me what you're thinking about what I just told you?"

The girl tightened her hold on her mother's shirt, she had since held onto the fabric and started playing with it, "Nothing I do will ever make you so mad at me that you'll stop talking to me, like my daddies would do?"

Shelby shook her head, "Nothing."

"But how do you know? I could do something really bad."

"That doesn't make you a bad person. That means you just made a bad decision."

"I wish my daddies thought like that."

Shelby looked at her daughter with more concern, "I'm sure they don't think you're a bad person. Nobody could ever think that about you Rach."

 _Why else don't they love me like you love me, then?_

"Yeah, I guess. I don't know." The 11 year old sighed. She didn't want to talk or think about any of it anymore. "...I really hope they get here for Christmas." She finally said.

Moments like this left Shelby frustrated. Moments when her daughter opened up, then shut it down just as quickly.

She looked back at her daughter and could see that the girl had already closed her eyes. She wished so hard that she could protect Rachel from her thoughts. If only that were possible.

"Mama?"

"Hmmm, yes love?"

"Are you still gonna sing?"

 _I'll sing for as long as you need me to._

Shelby moved under the covers and opened her arms, waiting for Rachel to get comfortable. In moments Rachel's head was on her mother's chest, an arm wrapped around her mom. She was the face of innocence in Shelby's eyes. Could she stay this small forever?

"One song." Shelby whispered and gave her daughter's head a kiss before starting to sing her tired pre-teen to sleep.

…. ….. …

"I want Puck to ask me out for the Winter Dance."

Quinn accidentally scoffed out loud when she heard Amanda make that declaration.

Her and Santana were Facetiming Amanda from Santana's room, and they'd just moved onto the topic of the dance. Both the Latina and the Blonde were on Santana's computer laying comfortable next to each other on Santana's bed.

"What's your issue?" Amanda asked with narrowed eyes.

Quinn shrugged, "He doesn't like you Amanda."

Santana's eyes widened. Quinn was always so bold when it came to being honest. Santana would certainly be characterized as bold and blunt, but there was something refreshing about Quinn and her honesty.

"How do you know that?" Amanda spit back, then looked to her other friend for back up, "San, do you think he likes me?"

The Latina now had two blondes staring at her waiting expectantly for her answer. "I-I don't know. He's a weirdo."

Quinn rolled her eyes, "He likes Rachel. Come on, anyone with eyes can see that."

Amanda scoffed, "The nerd loser? No, he just feels sorry for her."

"Why are you always such a bitch to her?" Quinn suddenly asked. Rachel was not that bad. She even liked her during choir. Sure she was a know it all, but it had grown on the blonde. And after hearing Maribel Lopez warn Santana to be nice to the girl she felt more secure in her decision to like the girl. In Quinn's eyes Mrs. Lopez was the pinnacle of a good judge of character. She was also like her second mother.

"What's up your ass?" Amanda scoffed.

Santana elbowed Quinn, "Dude, shut up. You're the bitchy one right now."

"If Puck asks her out, I swear to God she's dead. San, you and I are going to give her hell." Amanda added.

Santana chuckled nervously, knowing Quinn was giving her a look, and the fact that should she raise hell on Rachel and her mother found out it would all be over for her. God, why was she being given such hard choices?!

"Girls!" All three of them heard coming from the stairs in the Lopez household.

Santana checked the time, "Shit, we gotta go."

"What, you have a bedtime Santana?" Amanda poked fun.

"Shut up." Santana rebuffed.

"We'll see you at school tomorrow. Bye!" Quinn said ending the call for both of them.

"You're gonna get your ass beat." Santana laughed at Quinn.

"By who?"

"Amanda, who else?"

"Because I'm not scared to tell her the truth?" The blonde scoffed, "Whatever."

"Well I'm just saying."

"It's almost 9:30 and you're both not even dressed for bed!" Maribel came in immediately getting onto them, "Let's go. I want to see both of you in pajamas with your faces washed and teeth brushed in 15 minutes."

"Yes ma'am."

"Yes Maribel."

Quinn got up first and headed to the guest bedroom where she stayed while at the Lopez household.

"Is papi home yet?" Santana asked her mother before she walked away.

Maribel gave her daughter a sympathetic frown, "No sweetheart. There was complications with one of his patients, so it looks like he'll be staying later than he thought."

Santana pouted, "Can I call him?"

"He's in the OR right now, princesa. I'm sorry. But he promised that he'd come into your room and give you and Quinn a kiss before he went to bed."

The tall Latina sighed, "Okay then."

The woman walked over and kissed her daughter's forehead, "Would you like me to tuck you in tonight?"

Santana gave a small smile and ducked her head, both embarrassed by the question, but also of her answer.

The mother knew though without Santana having to say it, "I'll stay with you as long as you want me too."

Santana looked up and grinned. Being the cool kid in school was hard. Sometimes she envied the nerds because they could be themselves. But Santana felt like she always had to censor herself. At home though, when she got tucked in, or when she was with her papi, all of that melted away.

"Thanks mami."

Maribel Lopez then walked the few steps it took to get to their guest bedroom. She knocked first and waited for the blonde teen to answer with a "come in."

The blonde was sitting cross legged in the middle of the bed. Santana didn't know this but her mother would always tuck Quinn in whenever she stayed over.

"Let's get you under the covers Quinnie."

Quinn scooted up and let Maribel pull the covers back.

"Did you talk to your parents?" Maribel asked softly as she pulled the covers over her.

The blonde sighed, "My mom texted me and told me to text her when I was here. She said not to call because they were at some conference all day today."

Maribel bit her lip, trying to hold in any anger she had towards Quinn's ever busy parents.

She bent down and gave Quinn a lingering kiss on her temple, "You know you are always loved and welcome in our house. I love you m'hijita."

"I love you too Maribel." The preteen answered honestly, wishing for a moment that Maribel could be her mother, that her own mother could love her just as hard as Maribel Lopez loved Santana.

 **I'm so happy y'all have kept up with me! The summer is coming and my first year teaching is coming to an end, so hopefully that means more writing ;D! Please tell me what you think!**


	9. Nice Boys and Mean Girls

Shelby sat at her desk at school, breathing in the moment of peace before the storm. The teacher knew that it would only be minutes before students started filing into her room. She looked at the picture of her and Rachel on her desk and smiled, thinking about the night before, how Rachel held onto her and played with the buttons on the front of her shirt as she was sung to sleep.

There was so much tenderness to Rachel that Shelby sometimes worried about her. She thought of the high school dynamics that went on every single day at her workplace, and shuddered to think about a freshman Rachel being pushed around on her first day of high school.

If Rachel would let her she'd hold her hand and walk her to every single one of her classes.

Shelby rolled her eyes at the thought. That was a bit ridiculous, and definitely not age appropriate. Maybe if Rachel was 4 not 14.

The mother thought about Rachel at school. Was Kurt with her? Was she in the choir room? Or was she by herself, nervous? Maybe even scared?

It didn't take long for Shelby to realize that Kurt, and choir class were Rachel's safe haven. It was where the 11 year old shined in a place where her light was dulled by her peers.

Ever since Shelby had found out more about the extent of Rachel's issues at school the woman had kept a close eye on how Rachel was feeling at the end of the school day. The preteen hadn't said too much since the incident with Santana, but regardless, the mother was ready to stalk into the middle school should she have to.

"Coach C! Coach C!" A voice echoed through the hallways making Shelby look up as her door burst open. "I got a call back for the Academy Arts Winter Program!" A breathless child came in.

The excited junior beamed at her vocal coach, pushing her phone towards her, "Look!"

Shelby took the phone and read the email opened through the cracked screen.

"Dear Ms. Alvarez. Congratulations! We were pleased with your audition and would like to invite you for a callback. Please email us back with dates that you will be available starting-"

The brunette squealed in delight as Shelby read.

"Jazz I am so proud of you!" She opened her arms and hugged the girl tight. Jasmine let go first, then looked at her mentor with nothing but business written on her face, "Can you help me prepare for it? I have two weeks to come up with something kickass."

If it were anyone else Shelby would have thought before answering, but Shelby had a soft spot for Jasmine Alvarez.

Jasmine was in both her class and Glee club, and the girl shined in both situations. But the bright 16 year old's home life was a struggle. The teacher had learned the backstory of her life in bits and pieces.

She'd come to America at 8 years old from Mexico, and was undocumented until she gained her residency last year. Her and her family lived in a cramped apartment along with her aunt, uncle, and 3 kids in order to make rent. On the weekends Jasmine would join her parents and clean houses with her brother and sister. All of this while still managing to succeed and outshine her more affluent peers in her most difficult of classes.

The teenager's work ethic and determination to succeed for both herself and her family was what made her stand out to Shelby.

"Of course Jazz."

"When would be best for you Coach? I don't wanna put you out, or take time between Rachel and you."

Shelby had introduced Rachel to the Glee club just last week. The 11 year old had been shy at the beginning of the rehearsal but by the end of it Shelby had sent her to the tops of the auditorium seats after continuously interrupting the practice with her incessant questions and comments. The club thought it was pretty funny how their usually serious director could get so out of sorts by such a tiny thing.

 _"Stop! Stop!" Shelby directed, one hand on her hip as a fierce look gazed at her students, "I need every single one of you practicing at 100 percent. Or we'll keep doing it until I believe that you're all doing so. We are a few days from our performance and only half of you are where you should be. If we want to be on top we need to practice like we want it."_

 _Rachel who was sitting criss cross applesauce by her mom's feet looked up at Shelby completely confused. Why was her mom being so rude about it? And was she crazy, they were all so good!_

 _"But they were amazing mom!" Rachel praised the group, causing all of them to break character at her declaration. At least one Corcoran appreciated their effort!_

 _"Rachel." Shelby said through her teeth. But the girl ignored her, and stood up, completely forgetting that her mom had told her to find a seat and not ask any questions until after the students finished their run through of the song. Shelby held in an eye roll when her daughter decided to sit on the floor literally inches next to her, "So I won't miss anything!" She exclaimed._

 _But Rachel had decided that after her mother's criticism throughout the rehearsal they needed a pick me up._

 _"I think you guys are gonna win!" She was about to keep talking but her mother's hand wrapping around her arm stopped her._

 _"Mom, let go!" Rachel whined, "They're good, you're just being too picky. Like when you're picky about what you're gonna wear to work the next day."_

 _Snickers were heard among the teenagers but one look towards the Glee club from their coach was enough to silence them. Although they were no fools. Last time someone interrupted their rehearsal they thought Shelby was going to kill them with her words, but it seemed that their feared coach's Kryptonite was a tiny brunette 11 year old._

 _Shelby sighed with a headshake and looked at her team, "Alright, five minute break."_

 _A smile came over them. "Thank miss talkative over here." Shelby added eyeing her daughter with an unimpressed look that finally made Rachel come back to her senses._

 _She took her daughter's hand, "You're coming with me little lady." She walked briskly with her daughter in tow._

 _Rachel felt herself blush as her mom pulled her away from the high school kids._

 _"Mama!" Rachel whispered, she had tried to keep it at 'mom' in front of the bigger kids._

 _Rachel tried tugging her hand but Shelby wasn't having it and didn't let go once, "They're all watching!" The brunette child complained. Why were the stairs to the top of the auditorium suddenly so long?_

 _Shelby said nothing until they got to the last row and she could properly talk to her daughter, "I want you to stay here until after my rehearsal is over." She felt her patience running thin._

 _Rachel's lower lip pouted in reluctance, but her mom hurried her along with two firmer than normal pats to her bottom, "Let's go Rachel. In the seat now."_

 _Shelby didn't have time to explain completely to her daughter why her behavior wasn't appropriate in that moment, so she tried to be brief._

 _"Look at me Rachel."_

 _The girl gave in after a moment and met eyes with her mother. She really wanted to stay up front and not all the way back here! She was just trying to make them feel better!_

 _"Rach, this is my workplace, and on our way here I told you that I take my practices seriously. I know that you're really excited about seeing the Glee club and watching them, but you can't interrupt like that it ruins their focus and my focus."_

 _Shelby saw her daughter's eyes soften. "Stay here for me, and then afterwards you can tell them how good they are."_

 _The 11 year old buried her head in her arms as a show of unhappiness with her mother. Shelby looked to the sky for help._

 _This was why people didn't take their kids to work._

 _Not happy with the turn of events, but knowing she had to go back to her team Shelby kissed the top of her girl's head, "We're almost done."_

 _"Not if you keep making them do it over again." Rachel grumped from within her arms. Had she been looking at her mom she definitely wouldn't have said it._

 _The mother held her breath, though her eyes instinctively narrowed. Patience. Patience. Patience._

 _"Don't move from that seat." The mother told her. By the time Rachel looked up her mom was walking back down the steps towards her students._

 _The 11 year old took out her phone and busied herself with it. She was no longer in the mood to listen to the club after her mom's scolding. She thought about what she'd said just as her mom left back down and she hoped to God Shelby wasn't too mad at her about it._

 _Her dads always said she had a big mouth, and so did her cousins._

 _By the time Shelby and the club were finished it was 7:45, and when Shelby walked up the stairs after dismissal she found the energetic 11 year old peacefully asleep, curled into herself on the seat._

 _The mother smirked, looked like her daughter had tired herself out. She'd tired Shelby out too._

 _It was an odd sight for the club members to see their stoic coach carrying her 11 year old so gently in her arms._

 _"Let's go princess." Shelby whispered picking her up and carrying her bridal style. The small preteen clutching at her mother's shirt for warmth. "Looks like it's bedtime for you."_

 _It was Jasmine who helped carry Rachel's things to Shelby's car. She watched as Shelby sat the girl down and buckled the seat belt for her._

 _"M-mommy-" Rachel opened her eyes, disoriented, the upset feelings towards her mom momentarily forgotten._

 _Jasmine smiled at the sound of Rachel calling her mom so innocently, after being so hyper during practice._

 _"Shh. We're in the car. You can lay back down. I had to get your seatbelt on."_

 _Rachel had no issue following that directive._

 _"Here's Rachel's shoes and her backpack, coach." Jasmine said kindly, looking at the little girl laying down in the car._

 _It was fascinating to see this facet of her teacher. Shelby had long served as a woman who gave her advice, who had occasionally helped her pay for Glee outfits, and hugged her when she cried. But seeing her as a mother to Rachel was a whole new level of tenderness that she hadn't seen. For a moment, Jasmine wished her mother was as kind as Ms. Corcoran._

 _"Thanks Jasmine." Shelby reciprocated with a smile, "Be safe on your way home." Knowing that sometimes the girl took the public bus all the way home._

 _"Yes ma'am. See you in class tomorrow!"_

 _Unfortunately Rachel was no longer allowed to tag along with Shelby. They stuck to their routine of Rachel going over to her aunt Carrie's instead. Although Rachel would beg her mom sometimes to come with her, all the while promising to be as quiet as she could. "Could" of course being the operative word. Shelby wasn't sure how quiet Rachel "could" get herself to be._

 _…._

"We can practice next weekend, and on off rehearsal days this week. It won't be an issue." Shelby offered Jasmine.

Rachel might not be too keen on getting dropped off at her aunt's so early in the morning, but the mother wasn't too worried about it. Her daughter could be very understanding when things were explained to her.

"Are-are you sure? Maybe one or two practices is enough."

Shelby put a hand on the girl's shoulder, "I believe you can get this with the right amount of practice. I'm not going to let this opportunity get by you. So no more worries about it, okay? Just make sure you're here at school by 8 am Saturday and Sunday."

"I just, ummm…I don't know if my parents will let me miss work on the weekends."

"Not even for a school related activity?"

The teenager grew shy and looked down at the floor. "N-no. Not for this….you know, not for…singing."

Now Shelby understood. Her parents didn't want her to waste her potential in the Arts. It was a hard bargain to sell.

"Is it possible for me to go talk to them?"

The teen's eyes grew, "L-like at my house?"

"I want them to understand that this is serious." Shelby explained.

"Oh…can you come today? They work at nights today, so they'll be free."

"Would you mind me coming a bit after school? I have to pick up my kiddo and she might end up tagging along."

Jasmine smiled, slightly nervous, but happy that Ms. Corcoran was willing to go the extra mile for her, "Yeah, yeah that works." The girl's face fell, "But ummm, Ms. C?"

"What's wrong?"

"I don't want your effort to go to waste on me. What if I don't get in?"

Shelby leaned on her desk, "It won't go to waste. You'll get in, you'll see."

The bell rang and soon both teacher and student became busy with the routine of school life. Shelby's thoughts occasionally wandering to Rachel, hoping her school day was going well.

…. …. ….

Rachel sat in her 3rd period. English.

She was trying to focus on the book in front of her as their teacher had given them silent reading time, but unfortunately Puck was recently moved to a seat behind her. He kept throwing small little papers at her just to irritate her. The brunette was doing her best to ignore it, but it was getting to be a bit much.

Although sometimes Puck made her laugh with his dumbassery in class, and he told Danny Navarro to "shut the fuck up" when he made fun of Rachel for being a smarty pants. The 11 year old kind of liked that. But in that very moment he was being so stupid with the paper throwing.

 _Tink._

One more.

 _Tink._

Two more.

Tink. Tink.

A little bit harder.

Tink….. _TINK!_

The 11 year old finally turned around. "What do you want?" She whispered harshly at the now triumphant looking boy.

"It took 17 paper balls to get you to look at me." He smiled dashingly, "It took me 23 last week."

Rachel glared at him angrily. She stood up and moved to an empty seat. "Mr. McDaniels, can I sit here?"

The teacher looked over and nodded in approval towards one of his star students. Rachel missed it but Puck frowned when she moved away. The boy shook his head and flipped the page to his book absently. It's not like he'd been reading it anyway.

Santana shared the class as well and had been keeping a close eye on the interaction. It was clear that Puck's lizard brain was telling him that being an asshole was the way to show his attraction towards Rachel.

"Idiot." She mumbled towards Puck. The Latina could not understand how the boy was even attracted to her. Rachel could be so annoying with her "know-it-allness" and she looked like a 9 year old for god's sake!

When the bell rang Mr. McDaniels made one last announcement before the bell rang.

"Remember to buy your tickets this week for the Winter Dance." He called out to the group of kids filing out to get to lunch; "It's 10 dollars cheaper!"

Santana's eyes lasered onto Puck and she saw how his look gravitated towards Rachel at the mention of the dance.

"Well…shit." Santana groaned to herself. Amanda was going to be so mad. God damn it!

Once at lunch Rachel joined her trusted and never failing friend Kurt at their typical table by the entrance, and once again Puck decided to crash their party.

"Hello my lovely outcast duo." He sat down abruptly and elbowed Kurt playfully, though Kurt was mid drinking of his milk.

He death glared at Puck, "Hello Puck."

"Rach, I remember you liked the PB and J's they give for lunch so I snagged you one." He winked at her and slid it over.

"Did you bring me something?" Kurt brightened up.

"Nah, you're too weird for me."

"Noah!" Rachel chastised, sliding the sandwich back Puck's way, "For the love of God, can't you just leave us alone?"

"What? You hate me?" He slid it back.

"I didn't say that." Rachel pointed out, "You annoy me, and you're mean to Kurt, and you're so stupid sometimes. So I'd rather not have you around us."

He shrugged, "Well I like annoying you guys. It's fun."

"Puck, come sit over here!" Called Amanda, who was sitting down with Quinn and Santana.

Quinn made eye contact with Rachel and gave her a smile and a wave. Rachel bit her lip but smiled back, happy for the kind gesture.

The faux hawk haired boy rolled his eyes, then looked at Kurt, "See you nerd…Bye Rachel, " he pushed the sandwich even closer to her, then moved to sit over with Amanda.

"Here you can have it." Rachel gave he peanut butter sandwich to Kurt. Rachel didn't feel that hungry anyway. The boy took it.

"He can be such an asshole." Kurt mumbled through a bite.

Rachel stared over at the table Puck went to for a while, then looked down at the sandwich, "…yeah…the worst."

"You got a message."

"What?"

"A text message." Kurt clarified pointing to Rachel's phone on the table.

The girl grabbed at her phone and saw that it was from her mom.

 **"Hi lovebug. I hope you're having a good day! One of my Glee students needs me to talk to her parents after school. I'd have to go over to their house to talk. I can see if you can stay with Aunt Carrie after school, or you can come with me."**

Rache's brow furrowed, but she'd never pass up an opportunity to go do Glee business things with her mom, "I wanna come!" She responded.

Shelby chuckled at the enthusiasm that came through her daughter's text, "Oh boy." She mumbled to herself. She'd have to instruct Rachel not to give her two cents this time around.

…. … ….

"Ewww, Puck can you chew your food. You're like inhaling it." Quinn stared at his friend.

He laughed as he swallowed, "Whoops. My bad."

"Yeah, that's always your bad." Santana added. She took advantage of the fact that Amanda had gone off to get a water from the vending machine, "I saw you being an ass to Rachel in class."

"You mean the way you're an ass to everyone who's not part of your group…like, every day?"

Santana punched him on his arm hard, "Hey! See! Just like that!"

"I don't bully anyone."

"Unless Amanda tells you too." He shot back.

Santana looked to Quinn for help and she raised her hand as if to say she had not part in it, "Don't look at me."

The Latina scoffed and cut to the chase, "Do you wanna ask her to the dance?"

The boy looked at her more curiously, "Why? Do you want me to go with you?"

"Fuck no!" She yelled in disgust.

"Someone else does though." Quinn rose an eyebrow, as she took a bite of her sandwich.

Puck looked at both of the girls and thought for a moment, when Amanda came back and sat with them, it donned on him.

"No way." He thought out loud.

"No way, what?" Amanda asked.

He shook his head rather quickly, "No. Nothing." The boy avoided looking at her, but turned to Santana, "Oh San, yeah, I think if I would ask someone to the dance it would totally be Rachel.

"Are you serious?" Amanda asked before any one else, "Puck she's the worst!"

Puck locked eyes with the blonde haired girl, "Well she's pretty cool to me."

"What if she says no? You know she'll freak or something."

"It's not like I'd go to the dumb dance. I'm just saying if I did I'd ask her."

Amanda had nothing to say to that. She just scoffed and rolled her eyes. Hiding the anger she felt. The brunette had been off her radar for a while. But that would quickly change. Of that, Amanda was sure.

Santana could read the hell in her friend's eyes. She laid her head on her hand and sighed, knowing that Amanda would be back on her mean streak, which by association she'd have to be too.

The angst must've been read on her face because she felt an arm wrap around her. It was Quinn, her longest and closest friend, a small smile on her face. "Cheer up, buttercup."

… … …

Rachel felt a rough shove at the end of the day walking towards her locker. Kurt had left early that day, leaving Rachel alone in the hallways.

She looked quickly towards the source of the shove.

"Sorry." Amanda said, "Oh wait, never mind. You deserve that for being such a loser." She shoved her once more and walked away, joining Santana and another one of her cronies at their lockers.

The 11 year old withheld her desire to push the girl right back. She would've said something but Amanda was gone just as quick as she came.

"Jerk." Rachel mumbled to herself, dusting herself off.

"Forget her."

Rachel turned and was surprised to see Quinn.

"She has a stick up her ass." The taller girl continued.

The brunette giggled at Quinn's humor.

"Anyways, here you dropped this in class and I wanted to give it to you."

Rachel looked at her notebook and took it from the blonde gratefully, "Thanks Quinn. I wouldn't have been able to do the extra credit without it."

Quinn rolled her eyes, "You nerd...See you tomorrow."

"My Jewish queen!" Rachel and Quinn heard coming from afar. The blonde rose an eyebrow towards Rachel who was sighing at the sight of Puck, "Looks like your boyfriends coming."

Rachel looked at her stunned. "He's…He's not my boyfriend!"

Quinn just shrugged and waved as she walked away.

" 'Sup Jew-Babe." He said breathless after running when he caught sight of Rachel.

"It's Rachel, Noah."

"Right, right. So Jew-"

"NOAH!" Rachel scolded him, "That's not my name!"

"Okay, okay. RACHEL."

"Whatever. Look, I have to get to my mom's car. She's waiting for me." She cut him off.

Quinn's remark stayed in the back of her head as she walked away, though Puck followed. He was just a friend. An annoying friend that she couldn't stand half the time….an acquaintance really.

"Why's your mom out early? The high school doesn't let out 'til later." A nosy Puck asked, now at her side.

"They had an early release today."

"Oh…cool."

Rachel kept walking and Puck kept following. The girl abruptly stopped and looked at him, "Is that all?"

"What? You don't want to walk with the man, the myth, the legend…theeeeee PUCK!"

The girl only stared blankly at him. The joke clearly falling flat.

"Is that a no?"

"Why do you want to walk with me?"

Puck furrowed his eyebrows. Rachel was the only person at the school to question him like this. Frankly, it unnerved the usual cool as a cucumber boy.

"I like hanging out with you?"

Rachel let out a scoff and let him follow, "Yeah…sure."

"I'm serious!" He assured her more pointedly, "You're like a know it all, or whatever, but you're not shy about what you gotta say. And I dunno, that's cool. Don't you think?"

Meanwhile, Shelby was in the parking lot at the pick up area when she caught sight of a boy walking with her daughter. The mother almost choked on the sip of water she had taken. She quickly took her sunglasses off and narrowed her eyes.

Why did he look so smug talking to her baby? The mother's eyes widened. Who the hell was that little rugrat?

But she had to feel a sense of pride when she saw her daughter roll her eyes dramatically and say something to him that was obviously telling Puck that it was time for him to go.

The boy bowed to Rachel dramatically and then walked away. _Damn, that was kinda funny._ Shelby thought as she chuckled.

"Hi mama." Rachel slid into the backseat. She pushed herself forward and kissed her mom on the cheek as Shelby eased out.

Shelby really wanted to ask about the boy she'd just seen, but decided to not act too eager. Because, you know, that would be a really lame mom move.

"How was school baby?"

Rachel shrugged. "I-It was okay. Kurt left early." The girl frowned.

"That's it?"

It's not like Amanda's words that day were particularly rough. Loser, annoying, lame. Nothing new. Rachel could handle that. The girl had learned to tune them out.

"Mmmm…I guess so."

"You're sure about that?"

"Mommmm." The girl almost whined.

"Okay. Fine. Fine."

Sometime later, Shelby looked through the rearview mirror watching her daughter's small moves. The way she immediately fell into the soft tune of the radio and started to hum along with it. The way she was still small enough to push her legs up onto the seat so she could sit in her favorite position, criss cross applesauce.

"Mama, are we still going to your student's house today?" Rachel asked. The exchange with Puck afterschool had made her forget about that!

"Yes ma'am. I'm just gonna swing by the house to pick things up, then we'll head over."

Rachel leaned her head on the car window, "Do you think you'll ever let me stay home alone?"

"Of course kiddo. Just not now."

Rachel crossed her arms, suddenly feeling defensive. Did her mom think she was a baby or something? "Well why not now?"

"I'm pretty sure you'd burn my whole house down." The mother answered dryly.

"I would not!" Came the 11 year old's indignance. And now her mom was laughing at the joke. It was not funny! "Mama, I'm old enough, you know!"

The woman calmed down and stopped her chuckling, "Rach relax, I know you wouldn't do that. How about when you're 14?"

"Why 14?"

Shelby frowned. What was with the 20 questions? "You'll be older. Be able to think on your feet a little quicker, I think." She tried to turn the conversation around, "Why are you suddenly so interested in staying home alone? Do you not want to come with me today? It's okay if you don't Rach."

"I was just wondering."

It was truly just a curiosity. Although, if the girl was honest she didn't exactly want to go to Jasmine's house, but she also didn't want to be dropped off at her aunt Carrie's. She wished they'd just be going home, where she could cuddle up on the couch. Today had been such a weird day. Kurt left early, Puck was being extra weird, and Amanda started to pick on her again. She hoped the visit ended quickly.

"Rach? Who was that boy walking with you?"

Rachel immediately knocked her head back onto the window, "Noah Puckerman." She almost growled out, "He likes to bug me."

The woman tightened her hands on the wheel. Was this boy being mean to Rachel? Had she read his body language that wrong? "Does he bully you?"

"No! He's just…you know, a dumb boy."

Shelby wondered just how dumb this boy was. A surge of prtoectiveness ran through her body at the thought of that kid with a bad haircut trying to woo her very impressionable and innocent daughter.

 ** _Shelby! She's 11!_** Her thoughts screamed.

…. …. ….

The mother was holding Rachel's hand as she said goodbye to Jasmine's parents. The 11 year old had been nothing but polite and heeded her mother's warning to not be overexcited. It wasn't difficult because the girl was stuck in her own world most of the time, though there was still a moment where she felt the need to add her own two cents to the conversation about why Mr. and Mrs. Alvarez should support their daughter in her endeavor to pursue singing, and both Shelby and Jasmine were relieved to see that they had found it rather amusing, instead of distasteful.

But by the end of their time at the home Rachel was growing vastly irritated. She was bored and hungry and wanted nothing else but to watch tv on their couch. Her phone had died a long time ago and she was itching to leave.

God and her mother was _still_ talking. She slipped her hand from her mom and slouched behind her.

"Wait right here Rachel." Shelby told her before starting up her conversation again.

The 11 year old narrowed her eyes at her mom's back and chose not to follow the directive. Instead she moved down to the steps and started kicking around some rocks that she found.

Shelby caught sight of her kid slowly moving away and decided that it was long past their time to go, or else Rachel's fussiness would land her into hot water.

"It was so nice meeting you both, and thank you for providing Jasmine the opportunity to practice with me on the weekends."

"We just want what's best for her." Mr. Alvarez said.

They finished exchanging pleasantries and Shelby gave one last hug to her student before she made her way towards Rachel, clipped steps heading straight towards her.

"Mama, can we go now?" She asked impatiently, not catching onto the slight frustration in her mother's eyes.

Shelby grabbed onto Rachel's hand all over again and walked swiftly, "I told you to stay close to me Rachel."

"I was bored!" As if that was enough to appease the mother.

"This is not a necessarily safe place. You're lucky you stayed in my sight." Shelby added, "or you would've been in big trouble with me."

"We were there for hours! I thought you and Jasmine were gonna sing to show them how good she was. But all you guys did was talk and talk and blah, blah."

Shelby shook her head, "Rachel, it was a little less than two hours. I understand you being bored, but I won't tolerate disrespect, and you know that."

The mother caught her daughter's grumble and eye roll. She knew she needed to nip it in the bud.

"Hey." She stopped them from walking and bent to be at eye level with her daughter, lifting Rachel's chin to meet eyes.

The woman read a lot in those expressive brown orbs that were now guiltily looking at her, "Watch. The. Attitude. I know you're tired and you're probably hungry and ready to not be here. But you are crossing lines Rachel. We'll be home soon, alright? And then I can make you a grilled cheese with tomato soup."

A nod came from Rachel.

"I want to hear you say it, love." Shelby told her gently, but not so much that Rachel didn't know she meant business.

"Y-yes mama." She relented looking down at her shoes. She just wanted to be home.

Shelby wrapped her in a strong hug, noticing the slowly creeping emotion on her daughter's face. She had to get her tired child home, "Thank you for being so good today. You were excellent." She whispered knowing Rachel loved affirmation like that.

The moment succeeded in making the girl smile and ease her fussiness. The duo kept waking. But unfortunately for Rachel, when their car was in sight in the parking lot complex a man called out to them.

"Uhm, excuse me! Excuse me ma'am!" They both heard called out.

Shelby stopped to turn around after one more excuse me, while Rachel grumbled heavily. Would they ever make it into the damn car?!

"Yes?" Shelby thought he seemed trustworthy.

He was tall, about 6 foot 2 and wore a very sharp suit. His hair was still razor sharp black and a very well groomed beard framed his face. She was not expecting a man like him on this side of town.

"Do you happen to know if Apartment 3b is on the right or left side of the complex?"

"Oh, 3b? Are you seeing the Alvarezes?"

Jesus Christ. This trip had been never ending! It was now nearing on 4 o clock, and Rachel wanted to be anywhere but here! She scowled at this man who was now moving closer to them.

"Mom!" The brunette whined, tugging on her mother's shirt, wanting to just be in the car already.

"Shhh. Let me help him, then we can go."

"Yes, yes. I am. Are you familiar?" The man asked now much closer. Shelby felt an eerie familiarity in the way he looked.

"I was just coming from there. Jasmine, their daughter, is my student."

"Oh! Well I'm doing pro bono work out here. I'm actually working on Mrs. Alvarez's immigration case."

His comment made the trip a little more sobering for the teacher, "I see. Well apartment 3b will be on the left!"

Shelby was about to turn back when he stopped her, "I'm sorry if this is out of the blue, but did you happen to go to Spencer Lee High School?"

The older brunette was taken aback. "I-I did."

At that the man let out a big smile and extended his hands, "It's me, Paul Collins."

Shelby looked shocked for a moment. "Wait, wait. Paul, rollie-"

"Please don't say it, but yes. Rollie pollie Paul."

Shelby laughed and opened her arms, "Wow! Look at you!"

He chuckled and hugged Shelby easily, "I know I lost weight. Gained some muscle. Miracle stuff."

"Well where, what, how are you doing? Why are you here?" So many questions buzzed through her head. Paul was such a sweet guy in high school. But he rolled with a more geeky crowd. He remembered Shelby as being one of the nice popular girls in her class. She would always make conversation with him when they had Geometry and U.S. History together.

"I was working over in Toledo and recently moved down here. There's a firm that just started and I'm one of the litigators." He felt a piercing glare coming from somewhere he looked down and saw a mini Shelby standing right next to her.

"And you have a kid now?!" He exclaimed.

Shelby put a hand on the back of Rachel's head, smiling warmly at her baby, "Yes, yes I do. This is my little lovebug. Sweetheart, this is Paul, a friend from high school."

The 11 year old let out a meek 'hello' then slyly moved behind her mother, grabbing tightly onto the back of her mother's shirt. Shelby smirked at the girl's reaction. Usually her girl was a spitfire.

"It's nice to meet you Rachel. So who was the lucky guy?"

"Oh." Shelby shook her head. She'd forgotten that some people would still assume that if they saw that she had a daughter, "No I'm not with someone."

Paul pulled back, "I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked. Well, uhhh...she looks so much like you. Beautiful."

Rachel glared even harder. She was not really a fan of this blowhard.

Shelby laughed nervously, "Thank you...but well, we should be going." Shelby added right after that beautiful comment, putting a hand on Rachel's shoulder.

"Oh. Right. Right. Well, umm." He patted his pockets, "Here, wait. Take my card. Just in case you know you need lawyer help because you're in trouble or Rachel is…well that's stupid. You wouldn't need that. Just umm-" He put a hand behind his neck.

 ** _BREATHE YOU DOOFUS!_**

"I mean…here's my card. We can, um, catch up. Maybe. If you want?"

Rachel's eyebrow lifted. This guy was a lawyer? He was doing a horrible job at talking. Her dad's a lawyer and is as silver tongued as they come, nothing like this dude.

Shelby bit back her smile. It had been about 7 months since her last relationship. It was a brief one. She'd met the guy at a coffee shop, they dated for about 3 months, but it was very clear to Shelby that the man's priorities were a bit more selfish than she would've liked. She took the card, not knowing whether or not she'd call him, but the gesture was appreciated.

"Thank you Paul. That's really kind of you." He smiled and said goodbye as the mother and daughter walked away. He let out a breath he'd been holding and put a hand on his heart. He'd had a crush on Shelby Corcoran since freshman year of high school.

Once in the car Rachel flopped down and yelled "Finally! Let's go!"

The mother shook her head at her daughter's antics as she turned on the car, "A small detour. That wasn't longer than 5 minutes."

"He was kinda weird." The girl gave her two cents.

"And what makes you think that?"

"Why was he asking you if you had a husband? And why was he so nervous at the end? He should've just left after you answered his question."

Rachel didn't know it, but she'd gotten highly defensive and protective of her mother.

"I knew him from high school. He must've been excited to see someone from all that time ago. It was nice to see him."

"Was he your boyfriend?"

"God no, Rach! He was in my classes. We had different friend groups, but we talked on occasion."

 ** _Maybe I should've grilled Rachel about that boy the way she is me._** Shelby mused.

"Oh…well you said he looks different, and he said he lost weight. Was he big?"

"He was overweight."

"Bet he got bullied about that." Rachel pondered ruefully.

Once again the older brunette looked at her child with concern in her eyes. It wasn't fair that children, at such a young age, already had a cynical view on things. Shelby would do anything to take that away from her girl. "Well, he didn't necessarily have it easy. But I always tried to talk to him and I thought he was a pretty funny guy."

"That was nice of you mama."

"Thanks baby."

Rachel then spotted the business card in the cupholder up front, so she unbuckled her belt and leaned over to look at it but her mom slapped her hand away quickly, "Young lady! Lean your little butt right back and buckle your seatbelt. The car is moving."

Rachel pouted and huffed, but did as she was told, "I just wanted to see his card."

"That is not for you to see."

"Are you gonna call him?" The girl wasn't sure she liked the idea of her mom with someone, but she was interested in her mom's answer.

Shelby thought about it, not sure how to respond. The woman was a little bit interested in hearing about Paul, but she didn't think she was ready for a relationship. At least not now with Rachel not even a year into living with her, but her silence made the 11 year old nervous. Suddenly the idea of her mom responding with a 'yes' scared Rachel. It sounded like a horrible idea, actually!

"Mama?" She asked again.

"I don't think I will. And if I do it'd only be to catch up as friends."

That seemed to ease the preteen. She eventually asked her mom to turn up the music, and fell into an easy humming rhythm, one that Shelby always loved to listen to.

By five thirty they had finally gotten home. It was a longer than usual commute because of rush hour. Rachel bolted out of the car and waited eagerly for her mother to open the door. She was so ready to be cozy at home.

Shelby herself was tired. She grabbed her purse along with some papers she needed to grade and locked the car before getting to their porch.

After what seemed ages but was really a minute or so Shelby unlocked the door. Rachel ran in and dropped her things on the floor and ran up to her room to grab her phone charger.

"Rachel!" Shelby yelled up, "You need to hang up your backpack!"

"Okay, I will!" She yelled back, "Hold on a sec!"

The girl came back down just as quick with her stuffed dog in hand, sliding through the hardwood floor on her socked feet. The white keds she was wearing thrown about in her room.

In the process, her skirt flitted up with the movement, making her unwittingly show off her Winnie the Pooh undies. She hung up her backpack then jumped onto the couch, cuddling into its comfort and Clifford's comfort quickly.

"Home sweet home?" Shelby asked after having seen her daughter's grand entrance into the living room. She leaned on the wall, chuckling at her daughter who she thought currently looked like the definition of cute.

Rachel lifted her upper body towards her mom, "Yes! But I'm hungry too. Is there food yet?"

"We just got here!" Shelby laughed, "Give me some time and I'll call you when dinner is ready."

"Want me to help?" It was always fun helping her mom in the kitchen.

"I want you to rest this time. It's been a long day and you're a bit overtired."

Normally Rachel would argue that point, but she was very comfortable already so she agreed with her mom and laid her head back down.

While Shelby was finishing up Rachel's grilled cheese a notification on her phone popped up. She flipped the sandwich over then grabbed her phone to check what it was.

To her surprise it was a Facebook friend request notification from none other than Paul Collins.

"Well look at that." She said to herself, "Maybe that crush everyone said he had on me in high school was real."

Curiosity got the best of her and she accepted the friend request and spent her time scrolling through his pictures.

There were photos of him skiing, hiking, even some of him doing crossfit. "Fun life." She mused putting her phone down and starting to cut some fruit for Rachel to eat as well.

It was when she was placing the plates on the table that her phone pinged. Sure enough, it was Paul.

"Okay, persistent."

 ** _Thanks for adding me. Let me know if you are interested in catching up!_**

She was tempted to linger over it for longer, but unfortunately a loud crash put that thought to bed.

…. …. ….

Rachel was spending her time on the couch watching Finding Nemo and texting Kurt. She had started when the movie was already halfway through, but she didn't mind it.

The pair was going back and forth with Rachel explaining the bizarre trip to her mom's student's house when Kurt sent her over some discomforting news.

"Wait. Rachel. Amanda struck AGAIN!" He wrote to her.

"What do you mean?" Rachel texted back.

Rachel waited with trepidation. The three little dots on her screen letting her know that Kurt was writing something.

Finally, he put her out of her misery. He had sent her multiple screenshots of a comment conversation that Amanda and one of her friends were having on a picture she posted on her Instagram.

The picture was one of her making a kissing face at the camera with very clear bedroom eyes, but flipping off the camera at the same time.

The caption read, "Boys are dumb. But I'm nothing but the best."

One of her friends had commented, clearly gassing her up saying "He's an idiot. You're too hot for any boy anyways ;). Unlike some of the babies in our class."

"AKA the lame ass knowitall of the sixth grade…You'll never catch me dead dressing like a loser girl. Just like a fucking nun." Ashley answered back.

"Did you see what she wore today? A gray bunny sweater and a pink little girl skirt."

Rachel looked down at her clothes and blushed a deep red. She had thought she looked really cute in her outfit.

"Ugh. BLEH! Can she just disappear?" Was Ashley's final reply.

The words had hurt deeply but what hurt just as much were the laughing emojis that 3 separate kids had commented. Kids that didn't even know her, just…just laughing at her.

Rachel instantly felt her eyes water. She felt her blood boil. No. She wouldn't cry. No. Not because of stupid Amanda or her friend or the kids that thought it was funny to call someone a 'lame ass' and a 'loser.'

Instead she pushed that sadness down and exchanged it for anger. She threw her phone onto the floor out of a need for catharsis.

"Rachel!" She heard her mom yell, "Are you okay?!"

Shelby turned the stove off where the soup was heating up and walked briskly to the living room. She saw her daughter picking up her phone. Chocolate eyes wide as ever looked to her.

"What happened?" The screen had multiple visible cracks over it.

Shit Rachel. What'd you do?

"I-I dropped it." She lied.

"Rachel." The mother scolded walking over, "You have to be more careful! This phone was expensive."

The 11 year old felt guilty, but at the same time her mother didn't know what she had just read!

"I'm-I'm sorry. It was…I don't know what happened."

Shelby looked to her daughter and sighed, "You'll have to live with a cracked phone screen, or raise up some money to fix it, bug."

Deciding that it was useless to add onto her daughter's guilt she put the phone back on the coffee table, "Come on, let's go in the kitchen. The food's ready."

Rachel shook her head, "I'm not hungry anymore."

Well that didn't make any sense. She'd been practically starving before.

"Do you not want to eat because of the phone? Honey, you made it very clear that you were hungry."

"Well I changed my mind!" Rachel snapped. She got up and was about to move to her room but a firm hand on her arm stopped her.

"I have no idea where that came from Rachel, but you know that is not okay."

"Leave. Me. ALONE!" Rachel twisted away from her.

Without waiting for her daughter to respond she marched her into the kitchen and sat her down where the finished grilled cheese was.

Shelby took a deep breath to even her voice.

"I know you are hungry because you told me at least five times that you were. Sit here and take at least 4 bites of that sandwich. You're not leaving until you do."

Feeling obstinate and needing to lash out Rachel was not thinking clearly. She pushed the grilled cheese away, almost making it fall off the table, then she kicked her feet over and over, "I don't want to sit in this stupid chair! I don't want to eat!"

Again, the girl got up abruptly, effectively dropping the sandwich onto the floor, though to her credit, accidentally. And this time Shelby knew that she had to take her in hand.

Shelby didn't let her move more than five inches from where she'd pushed the chair because she lunged to grab her hand.

In one fluid motion she'd flipped Rachel and bent her over slightly. She pulled up Rachel's pink checkered skirt and gave her little girl six quick, but solid spanks on her pantied bottom.

"No mommy!" Rachel instantly pleaded when she realized what was happening. "Ow! Ow! Ma-OW!"

It was over just as quickly as it had begun. Shelby fixed her daughter's bottoms then turned a red eyed Rachel back towards her. The girl's hands immediately went under her skirt to soothe the stinging on her behind.

"Now, what has gotten into you?! And why would you ever think that it's okay to act like that?" Shelby scolded seriously, "You've had a creeping tone and attitude for all of today, and I'm not having it, young lady. If you keep it up you'll feel a full on spanking pretty soon. And trust me you _really_ don't want that."

Shelby pointed directly towards the living room, "I want you to go upstairs take a shower and put your pajamas on because you are headed straight to bed."

But that very small spanking and scolding was all Rachel needed to break the momentary angry front she'd put on.

The fact of the matter was, she couldn't handle her own thoughts and emotions. How could people be so mean? Why didn't Amanda like her? Was she that unlikeable? Why was she always just the loser? The loser that could disappear and apparently the world would be better for it?

Just the perfect fucking target. Easy to get mad at. Easy to laugh at. Her dads probably thought the same thing. Everyone probably thought the same thing. Didn't they? Every single person.

An overwhelmed Rachel pushed herself into her mother's chest and wrapped skinny arms around Shelby's waist, "M-mama!" She sobbed heartily into the woman's chest. The 180 response took Shelby aback.

What. Just. Happened?

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Rachel sobbed through. She couldn't bear the idea of her mother banishing her at this moment. She held on tighter so that her mom wouldn't pull away. God, was she afraid she'd pull away.

Despite the fact that she had just ordered Rachel up, Shelby held her close.

She felt an alarming worry course through her. She'd expected Rachel to let out some tears after getting her bottom warmed, but nothing like this.

"You're alright, kiddo." She cooed, kissing the top of her head, "I've got you."

Rachel fisted her mother's shirt, "I'll be good now mama! Don't make me go to bed, please! I'll be good." Her tears and nose now running freely, "I-I wanna stay with you!"

Shelby had already handed down the sentence, and she wasn't too keen on changing it. But her daughter's reaction was not normal. "Shhhh, lovebug." Shelby kissed her head once more, "It's _okay_ Rachel."

"No! I wanna stay with you! Please mommy! Please! I don't wanna be alone!"

Every plea pierced Shelby's heart. Something had hurt her daughter, of that she was sure. She hoped to God it hadn't been the swats she'd given her that broke her this much.

"I've got you." Shelby assured her, then with two hands under the girl's arms she picked her up. Rachel immediately latched on and wrapped her legs around her mother. "Up we go baby."

Deciding to stick with her punishment, just a slightly altered version of it, Shelby walked up the stairs with a crying Rachel in her arms.

"I'm going up with you, don't worry bug."

Rachel refused to uncling from her mother once they got to Shelby's bedroom, and so Shelby maneuvered sitting down on the bed with the 11 year old in her arms.

She managed to get her into her lap. The brunette curled in as close as possible.

"Oh Rachel." She rocked them both, her own voice cracking at her daughter's pain, patting her child's back softly, "I'm here baby. Mama's here…What's wrong princess?" Shelby pleaded with her child, "Was it the spanking?"

A shake of the head.

Relief.

"Rachel you have to talk to me." Shelby spoke quietly as she rocked her baby, "I'm not letting this go kiddo." Shelby was not going to take any half assed answers anymore either.

A choked sob came out of her daughter's small lips, tears dripped from her eyelashes once more. The thought of speaking her truth scared Rachel.

"But for now." Shelby's voice even softer, "I'll hold you."

…. …. ….

It was the many hums and gentle knee bobbing that led a distressed Rachel into sleep. Shelby hadn't realized it, and didn't look down until she heard the evened breathing and felt her daughter get heavier. She'd been so caught up in her thoughts. So many scenarios, so many theories that she hadn't realized the preteen's eyes get droopier or her cries come to an end.

Shelby sighed heavily after looking down at her sleeping daughter. The dried tears still traced her cheeks. She moved the sweaty, matted hair from Rachel's forehead,

"Princess, what happened today?" She whispered as to not wake her.

They still needed to have a very crucial conversation, but Rachel deserved to rest. It was already seven o' clock. Shelby wondered how long she'd been in though, suddenly feeling tired herself.

Moving her daughter onto the bed gently, the mother got up and grabbed the t shirt Rachel had slept in yesterday.

She carefully took the girl's skirt and sweater off so she could be more comfortable and slipped the t shirt onto her. Once done, she moved Rachel towards the middle of her bed.

Rachel stirred, but didn't fully awaken. The mother watched her for a moment, feeling dazed and worried. Feeling frustrated, and frightened altogether for her daughter.

"You _have_ to talk to me Rachel. You can't keep everything inside."

 **Hope you enjoyed it! Shelby will discover the truth next chapter, but not before one final hoorah from Amanda. Please tell me what you think :))))**


	10. We Need to Talk

Shelby turned to her daughter who sat in the backseat. Rachel hadn't said one word since the morning except to answer Shelby's questions, and even then they were nods and meek yes's and no's.

The mother steeled her nerves and gave her sullen daughter a gentle, but stern stare, "Rachel, after school you and me are going to talk, okay? I need to know what has you so upset."

"But you have practice-"

Oh. So she speaks.

"I'm canceling it."

Rachel's eyes widened, "But-"

"It's my decision. I'm the coach. And you, Rachel, are my priority. Now, when we talk I need nothing but honesty out of you, that's the only way I can help. You worried me half to death yesterday, and I'm really concerned Rach."

Shelby saw how her daughter tensed at the thought of having that conversation. There was also guilt written on her face. She gave her daughter a softer look,

"But it's all because I love you bug...Can I get a kiss?"

The girl couldn't help the smile that graced her lips. She obliged and kissed her mom on the cheek, earning her three kisses before heading out of the car. One on the forehead and two on her cheeks that made her giggle. Music to Shelby's ears.

Her mother's words rang in her head as she walked into the school building. She trusted her mom. She really did. But it was still scary, and even a little bit embarrassing to talk about what kept happening to her at school. Besides she hated the idea of burdening her mom with even more. Even at 11, Rachel knew that having a kid was tough stuff. Her dads certainly always let her know that.

The girl shook her head and tightened her hold on her backpack strap before going into school. "Here we go." She mumbled.

… …. ….

"Did you ask your mom if it was cool with you to spend the night at my house after the dance next week?" Amanda asked Santana while by their lockers.

The girl tried to hide her embarrassment as she made up an excuse, "Yeah, we're going out of town the next day so I can't spend the night."

The friend groaned, "Ugh, really?"

"Yeah, sorry." Santana quickly added.

"Okay fine. We'll just have to have a sleepover another time."

 _Doubt it._

Not with her mami being a drill sargeant about her friends.

 _Mr. Lopez walked into his front door and cringed as he came in during an argument between Santana and Maribel. They were both in the kitchen. He looked over and saw that Quinn was on their couch doing her homework._

" _Hi Quinnie." He went over and kissed her forehead, "How long have those two been at it?"_

 _Quinn chuckled, "Not too long. San just asked to sleepover at Amanda's house."_

" _Hard no." Santiago immediately said._

" _That's what Maribel said and now San's mad."_

" _Are your parents letting you go?" He asked, knowing the answer to be yes. Her parents weren't much parents anyway._

 _Quinn shrugged, "I don't wanna go so I didn't ask, but they probably wouldn't care anyway."_

 _For a while, Quinn had been distancing herself from Amanda. Really, at this point, she just hung out with her at school because of Santana._

" _I said no Santana. I don't like the way that girl influences you. Don't ask me again." They heard Maribel say._

" _But mami, please! All the other girls can go!"_

" _Not one more word about it Santana Lopez. Ya para el berrinche (Stop the tantrum)."_

 _They heard the dramatic stomp of Santana's foot, "This SUCKS!" She yelled exasperated, earning her a stinging single spank to her bottom._

" _You get yourself upstairs. Y no bajes hasta que yo te diga! (And don't come down until I've told you) Is that understood?"_

 _Rushed steps and a door closing roughly was the end of the argument. Both Quinn and Santiago weren't fazed. Santana had a knack for landing herself into hot water._

" _Esa nina, como que no le enseñamos respeto! (That girl, as if we didn't teach her respect!)" Maribel mumbled to herself, walking into the living room to check on Quinn._

" _Yes we did. You know she's going to want to come down and apologize soon. She hates it when you're mad at her." Santiago responded._

 _The mother looked up surprised. Santiago was sitting on his lazyboy chair._

" _When'd you get home, amor?"_

" _Just walked in the door a few minutes ago. Got to hear Santana's wonderful performance. Quinn caught me up with why she's mad."_

 _Maribel went over and kissed Santiago's lips, "Hmmmm. I'm glad you're home." She perched herself on the armrest, an arm around his shoulders._

 _He smiled softly, "I'm glad I'm home too. Do you want me to go talk to her?" He was tired from work, but wanted to be able to ease some of the stress that Maribel was feeling._

 _The mother sighed, "No. Let her stew for a bit." The woman looked to the blonde preteen on her couch. Quinn, ever so calm. Ever the brooder. So different from their own spitfire._

" _Quinnie, do you want me to check your math homework?"_

 _The blonde looked at Maribel shyly, hating that she was going to bug Maribel on top of the woman having to deal with her dramatic friend. "Ummm, yeah. Can you?"_

 _Maribel stood back up and sat next to Quinn, "Of course m'hija. Let's look it over together."_

 _Sure enough, Santiago's prediction was right._

" _Mami?" They all heard a much calmer, contrite voice come from the bottom of the stairs. Quinn frowned sadly. She hated when Santana got into trouble while she was at their house. I mean San certainly deserved it every time but she hated seeing Santana get chastised._

 _Maribel steeled herself. She wanted to let her daughter come over to her, but that would make her go back on what she'd said before._

" _I did not call you Santana. Go back to your room."_

 _A sniffle, "But-"_

" _Listen to your mother. Go on." Santiago added, knowing the girl wouldn't argue after he said something._

 _The 11 year old's shoulders drooped as she turned back up the steps. She just wanted to apologize to her mom!_

 _Santiago looked over at his wife, "Told you she hates it when you're mad at her." He smirked._

" _Can I go up with San after we're done?" Quinn asked them._

" _Let me talk to her first."_

 _Instead of calling the girl down, Maribel made her way up the stairs. She knocked on her daughter's door before opening it. She smiled when she saw that Santana was holding onto her blanket while reading a book. The tip of the blanket close to her mouth._

 _When she was younger the girl had a habit of sucking on the fabric. She'd picked up on the habit again when Maribel had gotten sick. The parents, though weary, were advised by a therapist to let Santana self soothe in her own way. Last year, they'd finally gotten her to stop completely._

 _Although the mother wondered if behind closed doors, their little girl still did it._

 _When Maribel cleared her throat Santana looked up and took out her headphones from her ears, "M-mami." She immediately said her eyes looking back down at the blankie in her hands, "I'm sorry for yelling."_

 _Maribel nodded, "Ven aca." She called her to stand up._

 _Santana walked over, pulling at her shirt sleeves. She felt relief when her mother hugged her tight, "Rein in that attitude Sani. I have my reasons for not letting you go to that sleepover. I'm sorry you're upset about it, but I'm not budging."_

 _Although still wanting to argue her point, the 11 year old knew it was wise for her to just keep quiet and accept her fate._

" _Yes ma'am."_

 _Maribel kissed the top of her head, "Good girl."_

" _Can I go downstairs now?" The girl asked, "I wanna watch soccer with papi."_

 _Maribel rolled her eyes. Forever a daddy's girl. "Take a shower, and change into your PJs. Then you can go downstairs, okay?"_

 _The mother watched as her 11 year old quickly grabbed her towel and pajamas before heading into the bathroom._

" _Don't spend too long in the water!" Maribel advised._

" _Okay mami!" She heard Santana say from the other side._

"Anyways, do you know what you're wearing?" Amanda asked Santana. Quinn walked up to them at that very moment.

" What're you wearing for the dance next week?" Santana asked Quinn, still thinking about her own answer.

"This red dress I have." Quinn answered nonchalantly, "I wore it for some dinner I went to with my parents."

"Oh, I like that one!" Santana added. She'd seen Quinn in it before, "I think I'm gonna wear my blue one."

Amanda was just about to give her two cents when she saw Puck walking down, "Hey Puck! Come here!"

"She's so desperate." Quinn whispered to Santana. The Latina elbowed her, making the blonde chuckle, "What? I'm just sayin."

" 'Sup chicks."

"Not your chick, Puck." Santana immediately answered.

Amanda ignored her friends and focused on her crush, "So were you joking when you said you weren't going to the dance, Puck? Or were you serious?"

Puck shrugged, "Serious. I don't wanna go. Sounds dumb."

Quinn scoffed, "Come on Puck. Just come with us. It'll be fun."

"I don't know. My mom might need me to take care of my sister anyway."

"That sucks." Santana frowned in empathy.

"Well why doesn't she just hire a babysitter?" Ashley, in her privileged world, did not understand the problem. Her parents had a nanny for her and her brother anyway. Not that she'd let anyone know she still had a nanny. Her name was Alondra, and she was more for her little brother anyway.

Puck narrowed his eyes. Even at 11, the boy didn't take well to stupid, " 'Cause we can't afford it." He said bluntly, "We're not all rich like you Amanda."

"Well, sorry." Amanda shot back, "You don't gotta be rude about it."

"Whatever." Puck shook his head, "Have y'all seen nerd 1 and nerd 2?"

"They have names." Quinn replied annoyed, "Rach and Kurt."

"Well you know who I'm talking about, right?"

"Haven't seen 'em." Santana replied, "Why don't you go find them so you can annoy them and not us."

The boy laughed, "Bye!"

Amanda, upset by the interaction slammed her locker door shut and stalked off.

"Looks like the beast is mad." Quinn muttered.

"Quinn!" Santana slapped her arm lightly, "God, why do you hate her so much?"

"And why do you like her so much?" Quinn shot right back.

"She's my friend. Last time I checked she's your friend too."

"No, San. You're my friend. And you don't need her to be cool. I tolerate her and am nice to her, like your mom says to do."

"Why do you always side with my mom?" Santana's eyes narrowed.

"I don't!" The blonde argued, suddenly feeling self conscious about it.

Though Quinn knew very well that she craved the love and affection of Maribel and Santiago.

Santana grew up with it, so she was never worried about their love running out. For Quinn, that wasn't the case.

Santana had missed the hurt that flashed in her friend's eyes "You do always side with them! You're like a goody two shoes around them. It's so annoying sometimes. She's my mom first Quinn!"

And Santana regretted it the moment those words came out of her mouth. Her friend's eyes saddened immediately and her shoulder's fell. She knew that Quinn's situation was rough at home. Her home was her blonde friend's refuge, and she'd never thrown it in her face. What the hell was she thinking? It's just that everyone was always on her case about her friendship with Amanda and she was getting so tired of it!

"Quinn I-"

"Fuck you San."

The blonde shoved the Latina and stalked off, not wanting to show that her words had hurt. Not wanting her tears to be visible.

'Quinn I'm sorry!" Santana called to her friend's quickly disappearing form.

"Damn it." The newly turned 12 year old mumbled to herself. Her mouth always got her into trouble. She sighed heavily as the bell rang. At least she'd be able to say sorry during second period. She needed to apologize, or else the guilt would eat away at her, and she knew Quinn didn't deserve it.

As the Latina walked to her first period, Amanda pulled her from her backpack behind the stairwell, "Skip with me."

"What? What if we get caught?"

"Come on, don't be a baby. Just skip with me. We can act like we're walking to PE and hide behind the bleachers."

"Well what do you wanna do?" Santana asked trying to hide her nervousness. She was still a badass, and intended on keeping that title.

"I dunno." Amanda shrugged, "I just don't care about art."

Santana bit her lip but nodded, "Yeah, okay. Come on."

"Move fatass. You're in our way!" Amanda yelled at a heavier set girl.

Santana said nothing and watched as the girl shrunk away. She looked at her friend and started hearing her mother, Quinn, and Puck's words in her mind. All of them saying how much of a bad influence Amanda could be.

Santana could be mean, but only when she felt it necessary to be mean. And calling that girl a fatass definetely wasn't warranted.

"Come on, we gotta hurry before the bell rings." Amanda quickened her pace.

Second period came around and Santana slipped into her seat by Quinn. She literally had done nothing except talk with Amanda and be on her phone while under the bleachers. Honestly, she would've preferred to be in class.

Quinn wasn't looking at her. It was clear that she was still upset.

"Q?" Santana started carefully, leaning towards her desk. But the blonde made no move to acknowledge her, "Quinnie, come on. I'm sorry! I'm a dumbass. I didn't mean it. I love that you get to hang out with me at home. And I really don't care that you're close to my parents. I think it's cool. You're my best friend."

"Are you sure it's not Amanda?" Quinn spit, "You've been acting pretty bitchy like her lately anyways. You know Maribel would have your ass for that."

Santana leaned back to her seat. That one had hurt. The bell rang and both friends didn't look at each other once.

When lunch came around the Latina heard Amanda once again talking down about some people with their group of friends.

"Oh hey San! We were just talking about that dumb Lacy, girl. Did you catch what she was wearing today? Almost as bad as Rachel!"

All of the friends laughed, but Santana held her breath and gave a weak smile. The crew eventually got their lunch and ate it. The Latina noticed that Quinn wasn't in the cafeteria.

"Where's Quinn?" She asked to no one in particular.

"I think she had a test to make up."

"Oh." Santana visibly deflated. Her eyes made their way over to Rachel and Kurt. The two were laughing hysterically as they were looking at Kurt's phone. It looked like they were having a lot of fun. "Nerds." She mumbled to herself.

Amanda caught Rachel getting up and going towards the restroom. She smirked devilishly.

"I'm gonna go to the restroom. I'll be back. San, Marissa, you wanna come with?"

Marissa agreed but Santana just murmured out an 'I'm good.' Amanda stared at her for a moment, but decided to go on anyway. She probably only needed one other person to overpower the loser anyway.

Quinn had finally walked over and silently sat at the other end of the table away from Santana. Both girls made eye contact but looked away swiftly. Unknowingly both mumbling 'jerk' under their breaths.

"San, you didn't want in on it this times?" One of their brunnette friends, Gina, asked jokingly.

"Huh?" Santana's head propped up.

"Why else would Amanda call you and Marissa. Remember last time when you all cornered Reyna."

Santana did remember that time. Reyna, an 8th grader, had been a royal bitch to them. She'd posted some nasty things about the girls on SnapChat, calling Amanda a baby whore, and so Amanda decided there needed to be some payback. They ended up pushing her into a stall and dumping a bucket of water the janitor had left in the girl's bathroom.

But Santana hadn't helped with that part. The Latina had only scared the girl to death with her words. It helped that Reyna spoke Spanish, so she could be flamboyant in her mami's native language.

See, it was Marissa and Amanda that had done the rest because Santana had stormed out thinking her friends had followed her. She remembered seeing Reyna run out of the bathroom in tears and her friends laughing inside.

She had worried about getting caught for weeks after, but apparently Reyna was too embarrassed to admit that a couple of 6th graders had degraded her.

"What're you talking about?" Santana pressed further.

"Amanda totally just saw Rachel go into the restroom."

Santana and Quinn immediately looked at each other. Without another word they both jumped up and rushed over to the restroom.

Santana was the first to get there.

"Let go of the door Amanda. It's not funny!" She heard Rachel yell from behind the stall. She could tell the small girl was pushing as hard as she could but the two bullies had the door sealed shut with their bodies against it.

Santana's eyes widened, "Let her go!"

Amanda looked over and smirked, "Why do you care so much San."

"I-I don't." Santana floundered.

 _Come on Santana. Yes, you do. Don't be a coward!_

"Just let her go." Quinn finally got there.

Thank God. Back up.

"Tell them to let go of the door!" Rachel yelled again, this time trying to kick at the door.

Amanda and Marissa looked at each other and smiled. "Okay." Marissa shrugged.

At the same time the pair let go just as Rachel pushed, causing the girl to fall hard, hitting her head and scraping her knee on a cracked tile in the process.

"Whoops." Amanda laughed.

Santana saw red. Rachel could be a royal pain in the ass, but watching the small girl fall on the hard tile made her feel an overwhelming amount of sympathy.

"You assholes!" She yelled lunging forward and pushing Amanda against the wall, "God, why do you always have to take it too far Amanda!"

Before she knew it she felt Marissa pulling at her hair to get her off Amanda, but Santana had managed to pull her down to the floor.

Quinn who had rushed over to see if Rachel was okay, felt the need to jump in as well to try and get Santana away from the two girls.

Seeing the fight, small Rachel limped out to yell for help. And soon enough one of the assistant principals, Mr. Garcia, who was down the hall ran over and rushed in. He quickly separated the girls.

"What is going on in here?!" He demanded answers and was bombarded with five voices speaking over one another.

"Enough!" The assistant principal was surprised to see the friend group having fought. Usually Amanda and Santana were the best of friends. He noticed Rachel angrily fuming away from them all. She was moving to sit on the bench as her knee kept bleeding.

"Rachel, go to the nurse and get that checked out. She'll direct you to the office right after, sicne you are clearly somehow a part of this too. You four," He gave them a meaningful glare, "are coming with me."

"Why do you trust her to go to the nurse by herself?!" Amanda sassed annoyed that little miss perfect always got the benefit of the doubt, "she might just leave. You don't know."

"No I wouldn't!" Rachel yelled, some tears still on her face, "You're the one that-"

"Stop it!" Mr. Garcia rose his voice, "Rachel, ignore her, and go now. That's an order. Amanda I suggest you stop talking unless you want to get into deeper trouble. Now let's go. I have four parent phone calls to make before anything else can get sorted out."

Santana and Quinn looked at each other simultaneously. The Latina's heart sinking. She was in deep shit.

Shelby's heels clicked all throughout the halls of the middle school. The woman stalked towards the office, her hand clutching tightly onto her purse.

Her eyes made a beeline to the waiting area, but her daughter wasn't there.

"Excuse me, may I help you?" Came the kind voice of the secretary.

Mama bear took a deep breath.

 _It is not this lady's fault. Be nice. Deep breath._

"Yes, I'm Shelby Corcoran. Rachel Berry's mother."

"Oh! Yes." The secretary moved to call the principal, "Hi, I have Ms. Corcoran here." She put the phone down and looked to the brunette woman, "Mr. Williams will see you now."

Shelby gave a curt nod, "Okay, but where's my daughter?"

"She's in the principal's office as well."

"Great. Thank you."

"Ms. Corcoran." The principal immediately stood up and extended his hand, but Shelby completely ignored him. Because when big brown and hurt eyes turned to look at the mother nothing else mattered.

"M-mom." Rachel eeked out.

"Oh honey." Shelby walked over to the seat where Rachel was sitting. She bent down and hugged her tight.

Rachel did her damndest to not break down into sobs, though she couldn't escape the tears that fell down her cheeks.

Shelby didn't let go until she heard the principal clear his throat. The mother kissed her daughter's hair and was going to sit down, but caught sight of the gauze on her daughter's knee. Rachel noticed her mother staring. God, now her mother was really going to get mad, "I-I fell on a broken tile and hit my head, but I'm okay."

Fire burned in Shelby's eyes as she finally turned her attention to Principal Williams, "What the hell kind of school are you running? My daughter could've been seriously injured!"

The man cleared his throat again, "Ma'am I can assure you that-"

"No, sir. Actually, you can't assure me of anything." Shelby started cooly, "Because I just learned that my daughter's safety has been compromised. And it took me looking at her injury to find out! So how are you going to stand behind your desk and try to assure me of absolutely anything after that ?"

"Ms. Corcoran, p-please." He sputtered, caught completely off guard. Parents were usually never this daring, "Can we just talk? I want to explain everything that I know." He sat down and invited Shelby to do the same, "Please...for Rachel?"

Shelby took a deep breath, reminding herself that just going off on the man would in fact be a pointless endeavor.

When the princpal finally saw Shelby take a seat though her steely glare never changed he began to speak once more.

"It seems that Amanda and her group of friends have been bothering Rachel for some time."

"So bullying has been happening and it took my daughter getting hurt for something to be done?"

Mr. Williams shook his head, "N-no ma'am. That's not what I-"

"It's what I understand from the situation, principal Williams."

"We weren't made aware of the situation until now. But both of the perpetrators have been suspended."

Shelby scoffed, "Right, so they get a few days of missing school, only to come back and continue harassing my daughter. With all due respect sir, but that sounds asinine!"

"I understand your concern." Principal Williams felt himself quickly losing footing in the conversation, "But they have been put on a strict probation. When they come back they will be on lunch duty. If anything else comes up related to them bullying someone they will also lose all privileges at school. No sports, extracurriculars, or clubs." The principal looked to Rachel, "I suggest you talk to Rachel. We would like to know the complete severity of the situation, but we only know what Santana Lopez and Quinn Fabray told us."

Shelby's head turned swiftly towards her daughter, "Baby, did Santana-"

The 11 year old shook her head, "No, she-she and Quinn stopped them."

"Let me explain what I know." The principal started as he told Shelby all that Santana and Quinn had said.

"...It seems that Rachel has been a target for Amanda and her friend group for a while."

Shelby looked at her little girl who looked both embarrassed and hurt. The mother knew Santana was friends with Amanda. She felt her herself freeze. Had she let one of her baby's bullies into their home?

"Honey, has Santana ever bullied you before this?"

Rachel finally looked up at her mom, red teary eyes. She nodded sadly, "B-but s-she's stopped though. She hasn't done it in a while."

"What has Santana Lopez's involvement been with harassing my daughter past this?" The mother turned right back and asked the Mr. Williams.

Principal Williams looked to Rachel, "That's something you'll have to talk with your daughter about."

Shelby once again looked at her daughter whose eyes were fixed on the floor. The irate mother snapped her head back up and leaned in closer,

"I really hope for this school's sake that something like this doesn't happen again to my daughter" Shelby's voice turned dead cold, "Your entire distinguished music program rides on the coattails of the grants that I've secured for both the middle school and the high school. Now, I've only included the middle school because it feeds into McKinley, but I can damn well end that starting next year. I suggest Mr. Williams that you put the fear of God in those girls because I don't take bullying lightly, ESPECIALLY when the victim is my child."

Principal Williams face fell in shock. It was only then that she realized that this was McKinley's glee coach. The one and only Coach Corcoran.

The hard, steely stare, and shocked face of the adults broke when they heard Rachel's rushed footsteps run out of the office.

Shelby immediately grabbed her bag and locked eyes with the principal, "I meant every word." She spoke icily, before rushing out in search of Rachel.

The woman didn't have to search far.

"She went into the office restroom." The secretary told her at the sight of seeing the worried mother step out of the principal's office, "It's a one person bathroom, and I'm assuming she locked it. Here's the key."

"Thank you." Shelby said, this time with actual gratitude in her voice.

But before using the key, the mother knocked. She couldn't blame the girl for running out. "Rachel baby, can you open the door?"

The mother could hear her daughter's soft sniffles, "It's just me Rach. I'm right out here."

A few moments later the door finally opened carefully, and a defeated Rachel stood in front of her mother. Shelby pulled her into a hug and when Rachel pulled away she immediately looked down at her feet, "C-can we just go home now mama?" Her voice so small.

Even an angry or sassy Rachel was better than this. She extended her hand and smiled down at Rachel sadly, "Okay princess. Let's go."

Shelby grew more and more worried on their car ride home. The girl had not said one thing. Her head was leaned onto the window and her headphones were in. All Shelby wanted to do was talk to her. It had killed the mother to hear how her daughter had been cornered in the bathroom and pushed into a stall. How they finally let the door open on purpose to get a kick out Rachel falling and hurting herself. She had wished so deeply that she could've been there to pick her daughter up and take her away from those mean girls.

Shelby tightened her hold on the steering wheel just thinking about it.

Those girls were damn lucky she hadn't seen them in the office.

Meahwhile Rachel kept replaying everything that had happened.

Amanda and Marissa pushing her in. Santana and Quinn coming to help her. Her mom storming into the principal's office and finding out what's been going on with her at school, and knowing that she'd have to go to school the next day and face everyone's questions and nosiness. Kurt was already texting her about it too. To top it all off she knew she made Shelby leave work to come pick her up. Why did she always have to go and make things harder for everyone?

All of it made Rachel's stomach turn.

Once at home the 11 year old made a beeline to her room. Shelby looked up at the girl scurrying up the stairs, frustrated. This was nothing like Rachel. She expected a lot of things. But she hadn't expected for her daughter to shut her out like this.

The mother rubbed her face in frustration. Was she supposed to go up and check on her? Was she supposed to give her time?

Her worry out won it all because a minute later she was at the front of her daughter's door.

"Rachel? Can I come in?"

 _Just go in! You are the mother Shelby!_

"I-I don't wanna talk about it." Rachel's voice came through.

But Shelby opened the door anyway and saw her daughter holding tightly onto her Clifford, sitting in the middle of her bed.

She took a deep breath to stop herself from pushing Rachel even more.

"Can I take a look at your cut, honey?"

The little girl nodded and scooted towards the end of the bed. "Mrs. Green said I don't need stitches j-just to keep it clean." She spoke quietly.

"Okay well I still want to check it to be sure."

Carefully, Shelby peeled the gauze from her daughter's skin. The gash was bigger than normal, but the nurse had been right in that it didn't require stitches. Though Shelby worried about scarring.

"Oh that must've hurt kiddo." Shelby cooed sympathetically. The attention made Rachel sniffle, "It hurt a lot." Rachel added feeling quite sorry for herself.

The mother stood up and kissed her daughter's forehead, "It'll heal soon baby."

She moved to the girl's restroom deciding to replace the gauze and came back over to her sitting kid.

Rachel saw the alcohol in her mom's hands, "Wait. No mom!" She pleaded, covering her knee with her hand, "That stuff stings!"

"I know it does honey, but it'll disinfect it."

"Mrs. Green already put some on though. I don't want anymore!"

Shelby saw that, yet again, her daughter was on the verge of tears. And though usually the woman was no nonsense and a stickler for health and safety. She knew that waiting to do this later wouldn't kill Rachel.

She put the bottle and gauze down, "Okay,okay.. Calm down. I can redress it tonight then." She put the old gauze back on and kissed the top of her girl's knee.

"Do you want to come down and watch a movie bug, or help me cook something for us?"

Honestly she didn't want Rachel to be alone right now.

Rachel looked at her mother and contemplated the idea for a bit but shook her head. The 11 year old wanted nothing more than to cling to her mother, but that just proved what everyone thought about her.

A baby. A loser. A nuisance.

Amanda and Marissa had really done a number on her. The insecurities her mom had begun tearing down at so easily built back up by her bullies.

"I-is it okay if I stay upstairs? I just...um, I'm okay up here mom. I'm okay."

In her room. Unseen. And not heard. It's how her daddies liked it best anyways. Or at least Leroy, especially when he was tired from work. He hated being bothered.

Rachel remembered Hiram sending her off to her room, " _Go Rachel. You know your daddy likes silence. We'll say goodnight okay?"_

They always forgot to say goodnight.

"Kiddo." Shelby sighed, looking at her clearly conflicted daughter, "I'm giving you the space you want right now, but after dinner this evening, we're still going to talk about everything, just like I mentioned this morning."

Rachel looked away. She didn't want that, not one bit.

But her mother wouldn't let it go that easily.

"I need a verbal answer Rach. You and us are going to talk, I promise you though, it can only help you."

"Yes ma'am." Came her quiet voice once more, "I get it."

But Shelby couldn't just leave things be, so when she went downstairs, she decided to do some of her own investigating.

The mother took out her phone and called, no one other than, Maribel Lopez.

"Shelby." Came the woman on the other line, "I was going to call you this evening. I'm assuming this is about what happened today, correct?"

Shelby's lips tightened, "Maribel, to be honest with you, I'm more than a little upset. And it's my understanding that Santana, although stopped Amanda and her friend in the restroom today, had a hand in bullying Rachel in the past."

Maribel let out a long sigh, "Y-yes. And I am so sorry and embarrassed. You know Santana, and you know how we raised her. She knows better. And I can assure you that after today Santana will no longer take part in any of it. She'll be reminded of it every time she sits down for a while too."

In fact, Maribel currently had a very contrite and red bottomed Santana at the kitchen table writing out her apology to Rachel.

Shelby cringed knowing exactly what that meant for the Latina teen, but if Shelby had been in Maribel's shoes she would've done the same thing. Honestly, Shelby would put all those girls in that restroom over her knees for a bottom warming that she was sure they were all overdue for.

"Shelby, umm-" Maribel continued after silence on the phone, "If it's alright with you I would like to bring Santana over maybe tomorrow evening to apologize to Rachel. I know it may be hard to believe right now, but she does feel horrible about it. It seems that she had a change of heart after a conversation with you regarding Rachel. And it took her a while to get the courage to stand up to Amanda. It doesn't excuse her actions at all. Her words really hurt Rachel, and I can only hope that her apology can be the beginning of making amends."

Shelby massaged her temples, "I'll talk to Rachel and see if she's okay with it. I don't know if she's ready. But I will let you know tomorrow."

"How is she?" Maribel sounded deeply concerned.

"She's really upset. I'm giving her space, but I told her we'd be talking after dinner."

"If anyone can get a girl to talk, it's her mother." Maribel added, "And again, I'm so sorry Shelby. You're a good friend of ours. And Rachel seems like such a fine little girl. She didn't deserve any of it. Not my girl making fun of her, not Amanda's hatred. I hope that Santana and Rachel can one day get past this and be friends."

Shelby smiled, "Maybe. But I think some time to heal for Rach, probably needs to happen."

When Shelby hung up the phone she checked the clock. It was 2:30. Still early. She'd still be in fifth period at school. She wanted so badly to go back up and check on Rachel, but something told her to stay put.

 _Rachel asked for space. You need to give her space._

And so the mother busied herself with getting a headstart on lesson planning for next week.

… …. ….

Quinn sat in the Lopez living room, knowing that upstairs her best friend was getting spanked.

The blonde had been instructed to stay downstairs while Maribel and Santana "talked."

Santana was already a mess of nerves by the time they got home. She looked to her mother with pleading eyes when her mother angrily closed the front door and made her way towards her daughter.

Santana backed up, "M-mami, please."

"We are getting to the bottom of everything Santana Lopez. Amanda said that you also took part of making fun of Rachel and others in the past. Well, little girl, you must've forgotten that's not how you were raised, but I'll remind you of that today."

"I stopped mami!" Santana said, trying hard not to break down crying in front of Quinn, "I haven't done it in a while. I know it was mean. I already learned my lesson!"

Maribel looked at her daughter and shook her head sadly, "No Santana, you haven't. Upstairs now, unless you want Quinn to be a part of our conversation."

The Latina shook her head, "No!"

"Then upstairs!"

The preteen quickly made her way up the stairs, hands subconsciously covering her bottom. Quinn watched as Maribel went to the kitchen. When the woman came out with the wooden spoon, the blonde couldn't help but gasp, "No Mari!"

Quinn surprised herself. She hadn't meant to say anything but the thought of Santana getting spanked with the wooden spoon scared her. She had still been upset with what Santana had said about her in the morning, but they were still friends, and seeing her finally stand up to Amanda made Quinn proud of Satana.

Maribel looked at the face of worry on her blonde charge's face. "It's okay Quinnie. I'm not not giving her a lot with it. I promise."

The blonde bit her lip and nodded. She'd felt the sting of the spoon once. Of course it was Santana's fault too. They'd been fighting in the kitchen and had almost burned themselves with boiling water. Maribel was quick to move them out of the way, but they received one sharp spank of the spoon because of it.

The blonde was sure that just a few spanks of that damn thing was more than enough.

"I'll be down to talk to you as well young lady."

Quinn gulped, "Y-yes ma'am."

And when Santana saw her mom come in with the spoon, she lost all vestiges of keeping it together.

"M-mami no! No spoon! I won't do it again. Please!"

Maribel put the implement down and sat next to her daughter. "You are only getting six after I spank you with my hand. Is that understood?"

Santana took a deep breath, "Pero mami-" But her mother's fierce look stopped the beg on her lips, "O-ookayy."

"Good. But you and I need to talk first m'hija. About everything."

And so they did. And it wasn't until Maribel learned about the times they'd made fun of Rachel for being such a "nerd" and a "loser," and how Amanda treated most people, and learning of the reasons why Santana had stopped treating Rachel so harshly that Maribel thought she'd inquisitioned her daughter enough.

"I am so disappointed in you Santana. I have half a mind to take you to Shelby's house and spank you right there. You are not better than anyone. And you do not make fun of people like that!"

Santana hung her head, hating how those words settled in the air. Disappointment stung. "I- know mami. I-I'm sorry. I feel so bad too. I really do mami."

"You will apologize to Rachel about this. Do you understand me?"

Santana hadn't expected anything less. "Yes ma'am."

And in moments Santana found herself standing in between her mother's legs, blushing terribly as her mother pulled her pants down for her. A tradition that hadn't changed since she was a little girl. Though, Maribel would argue that she was still very much so, a little girl.

"I don't ever want to have to spank you for something as terrible as being a bully Santana...step out of them m'hija."

"No!" Santana whined, folding her arms. She didn't know what possessed her. She just really didn't want a spanking.

"Santana." Maribel warned. Her clear spanish accent in full force.

"I don't wanna spanking!"

"Okay. Now those panties are also coming down."

"Mommy!"

"I don't want to hear it! Step out Santana. Or I will do it for you."

The preteen knew anymore backtalk and she'd be digging herself into an even bigger hole, so she slowly and finally did as she was told.

Her mother gently placed her over her knees and pulled her underwear down.

"M-mommy-please." Santana slightly drummed her legs on her mattress as her panties made their descent to her thighs, "Me voy a portar bien! (I'll be good)."

"Too late for that, Santana. Lo siento."

Santana laid her head back down, preparing herself for the punishment that deep down she knew she deserved.

By the end of it the Latina preteen was sobbing hard. Her pleas and cries had made no dent in her mother's technique, though it did soften the woman's heart.

She was so worked up by the end of it she hadn't noticed when Maribel had dropped the spoon.

It wasn't until soft hands gently rubbed her bum that Santana knew it was over, "Ya m'hija. Ya paso bebe."

The girl's hands went straight to rub her bottom. Maribel let the girl do so for some time over her lap.

Soon enough, she carefully lifted her contrite baby into her arms, making sure the girl's bare bottom hung in the air and didn't make contact with her lap. "Oh San. I hated doing that." Maribel whispered, to which the girl could only let more tears fall.

The 12 year old let herself be coddled. Without fail she always felt the most exposed, the most vulnerable, and small, during the aftermath of a spanking.

I'll be a good girl." She said through many sniffles and shortened breaths, "I will mami." She added, wanting to hear her mother's reassurance.

"Yo se bebe. I know you will...Can you tell me what you've learned Sani?"

Santana took a deep breath and cuddled into her mami's neck, "N-not to be a bully." She let some tears fall. Her breath started hitching as her emotions grew.

Maribel rocked her a bit, "Calma princesa. Shhh. Ya paso."

Santana took a deep breath, "I-I don't know why I always listen to Amanda. I'm s-sorry! She just-I thought she was a friend, but the way she was being so mean to Rachel, and I just-I let it happen. I knew it was wrong. I'm sorry mami. I am!" Santana wailed before being immediately shushed and rocked some more, "I believe you mi princesa."

The mother decided to rock and hum to her baby girl until she fell asleep. Santana needed a nap. Especially because when she woke up she'd be put to work on an apology letter.

When Maribel came down the steps, the blonde child was deeply engrossed watching a video on her phone. The woman cleared her throat, and the girl promptly say up quickly.

"Let's talk at the table Quinn." She gestured toward the kitchen and took the lead. Quinn sighed heavily and trudged after. She really hoped she wasn't in for something like Santana was.

"Were you ever a part of what those girls did?" The woman started rather bluntly.

The blonde shook her head, "N-no. Rachel's fine. I like her. She's annoying sometimes but I've never made fun of her."

"But you knew it was going on? And you knew Santana was doing it."

Quinn felt like the woman's eyes were boring into her. God, could she just melt into the floor? Was that possible?

"Y-yes." She squeaked.

She heard the woman take in a long breath. She could sense the disappointment. God, she hated disappointing.

"I'm sorry." She sniffled sadly and balled her hands into fists willing herself not to tear up, "I didn't wanna say anything because-"

"Because you're friends. I understand that." Maribel responded, "But Rachel could've been seriously hurt today. Do you understand that?"

She nodded her head, "Yes Ma'am."

Maribel looked at the regretful green eyes that stared at her and smiled sadly, "I am proud of you for standing up to those bullies today, sweetheart. But I'm just disappointed that all of this was happening and neither you nor Santana came to me."

Quinn hung her head and nodded. What could she say to that? The woman wasn't wrong.

"Come here." Maribel called her.

Quinn's head shot up. Was that like a spanking 'come here'? Oh shit.

"Quinn, now." Maribel added when the girl only stared nervously at her. There was enough sternness to get her to stand up and make her way over to stand in front of Maribel.

To the girl's surprise her stand in mother pulled her onto her lap. Quinn blushed as she was shifted to be more comfortable in the woman's lap, but still made no move to get off. It was kind of nice.

"Early bedtime today for you too. Understood?"

Quinn nodded into the woman, "Mhm."

"Have your parents called you?" Maribel asked. The school had called but couldn't reach them so as Quinn's emergency contact Maribel took her home, although it was basically her second home already.

"My mom did while you were up with Santana."

"What did she tell you?"

"She asked how long I was suspended and told me to listen to whatever you decide is my punishment for being in a fight."

 _Typical._ Maribel thought.

"Is that all she said, honey?"

Quinn sighed sadly, "Yeah. She was mad and was kinda short with me." The blonde couldn't help the tears that welled up in her eyes. She was sensitive when it came to her parents. They were always so cold with her.

Maribel rubbed her back, "I know sweetheart." She cooed. Quinn laid her head on the woman's shoulder and took deep breaths. She didn't want to talk about her parents and Maribel sensed that. She just wanted the woman's comfort.

"Sweetheart, I know that you jumped in to protect Rachel and Santana." She said.

"Mhm." Quinn answered through another sniffle.

"You're okay kiddo. I'm here."

Some time had passed and Quinn picked her head up, a fresh blush on her cheeks once more "Thanks Maribel."

"You're welcome sweetie."

But Maribel shocked the girl when before getting off the woman's lap, she gave her a quick pop to her backside.

"Ouch! What was that for?!"

"I don't want to hear about you ever fighting or being part of a fight again. Or else that small spank will be the least of your worries."

"Yes Mari." The blonde pouted.

The mother smiled and embraced the girl in her lap, "Would you like to help me clean up the kitchen?"

"Do I have to?"

"Yes." Maribel chuckled. She wasn't getting away with it that easily!

Quinn knew the ask was more of an order so she slowly got off the woman's lap after she was given a kiss and a pat to her bum. But cleaning did beat having a sore ass, so she'd take it any day.

…. …. ….

Rachel looked at her phone from the other side of the bed. She could see through her cracked screen that Kurt was texting her, probably wondering about what had happened. She would have to text him later.

She had spent the last hour replaying the past two days. It had been such a whirlwind. The young girl felt like she had no idea where she stood with anyone. Rachel felt so out of sorts, and conflicted with what she was supposed to do now. In a few hours, her mother would force the truth out of her, and then Shelby would know how much of a loser she was. And because her mom loves her so much, she'll want to somehow fix it for Rachel. Yet another thing to add to the list for her busy mom. Yet another reason she was more of a nuisance than a worthwhile daughter.

Rachel frowned. Her whole body was telling her to go find her mother. She felt like she was inside of a pressure cooker, and at any moment she'd explode. Shelby could fix that though. Her mama had a way of making her scary thoughts seem insignificant and powerless. Shelby was Rachel's superhero.

But Rachel was a stubborn girl unfortunately, and had gotten it in her head that she could figure things out for herself. That she could "be a big girl" like her aunt Carrie would always tell her.

Amanda and Marissa had certainly rubbed it in her face that she belonged with the babies in elementary because she was so lame. It's what they'd told her before shoving her into the stall anyway.

The brunette girl went over and grabbed her phone. Impulsively she dialed one of the two people that her thoughts kept going to. The two people that she felt could give her the answers to why she was the way she was.

The phone rang and rang, and Rachel sighed thinking that no one would pick up.

"Hello, Rachel? Is something wrong? Why are you calling?" Came Hiram's voice.

"Hi daddy. Nothing's wrong." She started quietly.

All the way from New York, Hiram looked at his watch. He had a deposition in 15 minutes that he had to prep for.

"Rach, this isn't one of our scheduled times to talk. Is there something wrong?"

The little girl felt her heart drop, but pushed through, "I know, I just, ummm. I just had a question."

Hiram let out a sigh, forcing himself to eek out an of course. This was his daughter, he reminded himself.

"Why-why did you and dad, umm..why was I so hard to take care of?"

Hiram was taken aback. Was she really...did she really decide to ask that question right freaking now?

"Rachel." He sounded visibly frustrated, "You were not hard to take care of. Your dad and I are just two very busy men."

 _Too busy for me._

"We couldn't give you what you needed. It was for the best."

"So it had nothing to do with-"

"Mr. Berry, we have to go get ready for the depo now sir." Rachel heard her father's assistant say.

And the little girl hoped beyond all hope that this time, just this one time, her fathers would put her first. Maybe her daddy picked up on her sadness, and felt empathetic enough to say that the deposition could wait.

"Rachel, I'm sorry. I have to go. Can we talk about this on Thursday when dad and I are scheduled to call you?"

The girl shut her eyes willing the tears away, "Y-yes sir."

"Great. Bye Rach. Talk to you Thursday."

The phone call ended with two beeps signifying her dad had hung up. He hadn't even waited for her to say her goodbyes!

Without thinking she grabbed a pillow from her bed and threw it as hard as she could at the wall.

"I hate you." She said, when one pillow hit the floor. The girl grabbed another one and threw it even harder, "I hate you!"

One more, "I HATE YOU!" She yelled.

She pushed at her sheets and covers until they were haphazardly on the floor, and flopped herself face down into the mattress, drumming her feet and yelling into the fabric.

Everything sucked! EVERYONE SUCKED!

She couldn't curtail the tears or the cries this time, so the saddened child curled into herself and let it all out. She was holding onto her arms so hard that the imprints of her fingernails dug into her skin.

Shelby had heard the yells and dropped her grading, quickly heading towards the stairs. When she got to her daughter's room she assessed the situation, seeing the contents of the bed strewn throughout the room, and her red and wet faced child huddled into herself crying.

 _You knew not to leave her alone. Why did you do that?!_ Shelby immediately regretted her decisions.

Then she notice how hard the girl was holding onto herself. "Sweetheart." She rushed over and pried the hands away, "Rachel, you're going to hurt yourself. Let go honey."

The 11 year old still hadn't opened her eyes. Everything felt so amplified and painful. Her dad's lame response and apathy had been the cherry on top of it all.

"I'm f-fine mom. Leave me alone. I'm okay!" The brunette girl finally opened her eyes and said brokenly up to her mother.

She was still upset, still stubborn, and wanted to cry it out alone. She wanted to prove to herself more than to anyone else that she could be independent.

But Shelby Corcoran wasn't having it. She tried to lift her daughter but Rachel squirmed and curled in even further, "No, mom. Please, I-I don't ne-ed y-your h-he-help."

Shelby frowned and gave her daughter a stern look. The time for soft words would have to be put on hold.

"Young lady, you are on the verge of a panic attack and I am not leaving you alone. Do you understand me? I am your mother and I'm going to help you whether you like it or not."

The mother, with strong arms lifted Rachel so she'd be sitting up despite the reluctance and fight that her daughter was giving her. "No mom! I wanna be alone!"

"No Rachel. We're gonna fix this together bug."

Rachel rubbed at her eyes and let out another this point the girl couldn't really control herself. All she knew was that crying was the only form of communication she felt could accurately convey the whirlwind inside of her.

Shelby knew before she could do anything else she had to get Rachel to calm down. And so she took the large t shirt Rachel had changed into right off her when she realized how hot the girl was as she had worked herself up so much.

"Arms up, so I can take this shirt off. You're burning up." Shelby said softly, though there was no doubt that she meant business.

Rachel looked at her mother with pleading eyes. She didn't want to do this. She didn't want her mother's help!

"Now Rachel."

"I can do this by myself mom." Rachel still argued through tears and hitched breaths as her shirt came off leaving her in just light pink ankle socks and the mulan undies that she'd begged her mother to get for her, "I don't-I don't need...I'm not a baby!" She sputtered through her crying.

Shelby bunched the shirt in her hands and brought it up to her daughter's nose, bringing Rachel's fist down from her right eye, and started to clean the 11 year old's face of the snot and tears, "Honey, I know. I know. I never said you were a baby. You are just worked up and I'm helping you calm down. That's all I'm doing."

But attempting to clean up her daughter was a useless act because she just kept crying. Feeling helpless herself Shelby gently grabbed Rachel and brought her into her lap, then laid down, so that her child was laying on top of her. Rachel's head rested on Shelby's chest, her legs splayed on either side of the woman. Her mother's heartbeat a source of comfort, the constant rhythm a welcome and gentle distraction from her thoughts.

The mother held her tight and started to rub the girl's bare back, her nails softly grazing up and down, knowing how much it soothed her. "Just let it all out Rach."

The woman grew relieved because despite the continued cries Rachel finally started to calm down.

"Shhh. Baby girl...You had an extremely hard day bug. And my heart hurts knowing that you're bottling it all up."

She started to hum a tune softly before beginning to sing, keeping rhythm with gentle pats to Rachel's bottom.

 _There comes a time_

 _A time in everyone's life_

 _Where nothing seems to go your way_

 _Where nothing seems to turn out right_

 _There may come a time_

 _You just can't seem to find your place_

 _For every door you open_

 _Seems like you get two slammed in your face_

 _Thats when you need someone_

 _Someone that you you can call when all your faith is gone_

 _It feels like you can't go on_

 _Let it be me_

 _Let it be me_

 _Let it be me_

Her mother's soft singing had managed to finally get the girl out of her head. Her mama, her superhero had once again come to the rescue. Rachel blushed at the thought of anyone seeing her like this, clinging so hard to her mommy. But she couldn't help it. She couldn't help that Shelby was her only safe place. Was it really that much of a bad thing?

She hadn't realized her thoughts were making her whimper.

"Shh. Sweetheart. Deep breaths. Come on, take a deep breath."

She followed her mother's directive and took three deep breaths. Rachel couldn't help the yawn that came after though, and Shelby noticed it. The mother checked the time, she supposed a nap could happen before dinner. Rachel deserved that much at the very least.

Shelby began to move her fingers through her daughter's hair, "I'm going to put you down for a nap Rach, okay?"

She was going to move the girl off, but Rachel held on tight, "Mama, no." She shook her head adamantly, now that she was in her mother's arms, she didn't want to leave.

"Want me to stay with you bug?"

A soft nod.

"Okay." Shelby smiled softly, "But let me put you down on the bed so I can grab you a pillow and a new shirt."

When Rachel had finally fallen asleep, Shelby took advantage of the free time to get started on dinner. It was going to be a long night because the pair still had to talk about everything. Shelby let out a deep breath just thinking about it.

… …. ….

Quinn hesitantly walked into Santana's bedroom. Maribel had finally allowed her to go spend time with Santana after the girl had written her apology letter, and then was sent back up to her room to work on homework. But only for an hour or so because Santana would have an early bedtime for a while.

"Hey San." The blonde mumbled.

Santana looked up from the book she was annotating for class as she laid on her bed.

"Hi." She whispered back, still very embarrassed that Quinn knew everything that had just transpired, including her spanking.

Quinn sat down by her friend, "You know it was pretty cool that you stood up to Amanda even though you don't like Rachel."

Santana shrugged, "I never said I don't like Rachel. She's just annoying." The Latina mumbled looking back down at her book and bending the top of the page over and over again.

A thick tension between them.

The blonde rolled her eyes, "Well whatever. It was pretty cool of you anyways." She laid down and started to play absentmindedly with her phone, waiting for her friend to say something.

"Q?" Santana spoke quietly.

"Yeah?"

"I didn't mean all that stuff this morning. I love you, you know? You're my best friend."

Quinn finally gave her a small smile, "S'okay. I can't be mad at you anymore anyways. Your mom got you good, that's like punishment enough, right?"

The comment made the Latina cringe, "Shut up." She gently pushed her friend.

"Quinn, I don't, I'm gonna get hell from everyone at school because you know Amanda's gonna be mad at me."

The blonde sat up, "Then we'll give 'em hell back. You don't need Amanda. Fuck her."

"If mami heard you say that just now, your ass would be hurting just like mine!" Santana chuckled half jokingly.

"Well good thing I don't get caught like _some people."_

The pair laid together and started to watch some tv when Santana looked over again because she felt Quinn staring at her.

"Are you trying to burn a hole through me or something?"

"So what made you finally tell Amanda off?"

Santana scoffed as she thought back and shrugged, "She was a jerk to this chubby girl in the morning, and you know man hands hasn't done much to her except be her know it all self but Amanda kept getting worse with her. I guess I just got tired of it." The commercial break ended, thus ending their conversation, "Now quit asking me questions Q, it's back on."

…. …. …..

"Mom?"

Shelby's head whipped around towards the stairs. She hadn't expected Rachel to have woken up yet and was sitting on the couch doing some grading.

Rachel stood in the shirt Shelby had changed her into. The ends hanging loosely by her lower thighs. At some point she'd put some loose flannel pj shorts on as well.

"How're you feeling sweetheart?"

"Better." Rachel whispered pulling on the hem of her shirt.

"Bug, come here, sit with me." Shelby asked. It was obvious that her daughter felt awkward.

Shelby wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Rachel leaned in.

"Are you hungry?"

The girl didn't get to answer because her stomach did the talking.

"Sounds like it." Shelby smirked, "Come on, I just turned off the stove so everything is still hot."

Rachel knew after dinner they would have to talk but she figured there was no more getting away from it.

Shelby had made spaghetti, also one of her favorites, but the girl struggled to eat the whole portion on her plate.

"Don't force yourself if you're not hungry anymore Rach." Shelby reminded her. The mother had learned early on that Rachel had been trained to eat everything on her plate for fear of being considered ungrateful even if she was full.

It was a hard habit to break, so Shelby started to give her small portions to begin with.

Rachel nodded and pushed the plate slightly.

"How 'bout you wait for me in the living room. I'll clean up here."

Her daughter's eyes gave her one last pleading look, so Shelby got up and kissed her head lovingly, "Sweetheart, you have nothing to worry about."

When Shelby came to the couch 15 minutes later, Rachel was laying on her tummy, her head near the armrest, as she watched an episode of Spongebob.

The cartoon had managed to occupy her mind because Shelby had heard giggles from the kitchen, making the mother break out in smile, happy that Rachel could decompress for a bit.

Rachel hadn't noticed her mom until she felt the weight shift on the couch. She sighed heavily and sat up. Prior to focusing on the yellow sponge, Rachel had decided to try a level headed approach with her mom. Maybe if Shelby saw that she was perfectly fine then she would be more apt to drop the whole conversation she'd been pushing to have.

"Mama, I-I think I'm okay now. I don't think that I need to talk anymore."

Shelby rose an eyebrow, "You might think that Rachel, but we are still having this discussion."

Rachel swallowed hard, "B-but, but I'm perfectly fine mom. It's pointless!" She was feeling indignant now.

"It's not pointless Rachel. You were dealing with bullying to an extent that I wasn't aware of for a while now. And I want to know why you couldn't come to me."

The 11 year old felt herself getting upset again. Goddamnit. So much for staying level headed.

"But why does it matter? I'm perfectly fine now. We can just move on."

"Rachel." She put a hand to her forehead and then back down,

"Do you realize that you were pushed into a stall by two girls, and then roughly pushed out ending with a cut up knee? That is not something that is just fine. You don't just get to minimize the fact that those girls were severely bullying you for a while now Rach! You broke my heart upstairs. That is not something that someone who is 'just fine' and ready to move on does. So I need you to get off the 'I'm fine' soundtrack because I'm not going to take it as an answer from you any longer."

The 11 year old looked at her mother with betrayed eyes. She didn't think Shelby would actually bring it all up like that. But she had.

The woman had let the frustration of the day get the best of her. And now she watched as tiny lips quivered and chocolate brown eyes teemed with tears.

 _You made your kid cry!_

Shelby sighed heavily, "Rach-" She said through a deep exhale. The woman moved to caress her daughter's cheek, but the girl inched back.

 _You deserve that one._

"I'm sorry honey. I didn't mean to snap at you." Shelby said softly, "I'm just so worried about you love."

Rachel looked at her mother with weary eyes.

"I-I don't want you to worry about me." The girl admitted looking back at her lap.

"Why Rachel? You're my daughter. I don't think I can control me worrying about you."

"I'm not supposed-" She shook her head. God! How did she put her thoughts into words? "...I'm not allowed to be a burden, more than what a kid already brings. You, you already do so much for me."

The mother felt her breathing catch. "Sweetheart. Is that why you found it so hard to talk to me?"

Rachel just shrugs, "And it's kinda embarrassing." She mumbled, her cheeks tinging red.

Shelby gave her daughter a sad smile and "There is nothing in this world that matters more to me than being your mom Rachel. I want you to really understand that. My top priority is your well being and your happiness. There isn't a tally of all the things that I do for you. I don't keep score. I'm not keeping count ready to hold it against you. I would never do that to you baby."

"Well why don't you?!" Rachel asked exasperated. She was so used to adults doing that after all.

And it was then that Shelby saw her daughter's earnest confusion. For so long, that is all that Rachel knew. It was foolish of her to think that a few months with her would just erase that. Despite how much progress her daughter had made.

"Love, I know that for so long the adults that were supposed to take care of you wanted you to be perfect. They wanted you to act right all of the time. And I'm sure that it felt like they wanted you to be a little a mark in their life as possible. But baby, you're going to have to get used to the fact that I won't and will never be like that."

Rachel who was once looking away from her mom started to look over timidly.

"I know it'll take time. But we have the rest of our lives together now, don't we?"

Her whole life. She had her whole life to spend with her mama. At least that's what Shelby was saying now. Things always change thought.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"You are my sweet, babygirl. The most important part of my life."

And the little brunette smiled. The mother leaned over and lovingly kissed her forehead.

"So can you tell me sweet heart, what else have those girls done?"

Rachel sighed. There really was no running from it.

"They, umm… I dunno, they like to call me names like nerd and geek all the time. Amanda always starts it. She thinks I'm a baby and a weirdo because of how I dress and because I'm smart. I try not to let it bother me but, but sometimes it's really hard. They made fun of my clothes on her instagram once."

"They took a picture of you without you knowing?" Shelby's voice turned hard, ready to raise all legal hell on the parents of these children.

But Rachel shook her head, "N-no. Just in the comments. It made me so-so mad."

Relief.

The young brunette felt her eyes water as she sniffled, "I know a lot of the kids at school think I'm weird and Amanda's popular so they just follow her, and, and I don't get why people don't like me."

Shelby willed herself not to cry at her daughter's disheartening admission.

"You're unique, and you are yourself. You are opinionated and for the most part are not a girl that cares what your peers think. People will always be intimidated by those traits in a person. I know it's hard honey, that's why I want you to always talk to me about these things. I promise you that as you grow up you'll find the group of friends that fit you perfectly."

"Like Kurt?" She asked her mama.

"Yes, baby, just like Kurt."

Rachel moved closer to her mom and laid her head in Shelby's lap, "I do like school and I don't wanna leave because Kurt is so cool, and Quinn is nice to me too, I just, I wish more people liked me."

Shelby let her silent tears fall, "What do you think about about moving to another middle school baby?"

"No. I don't want to."

The mother said nothing, but rubbed her daughter's back soothingly in response.

Although her mind had been made up. If something like this ever happened again Rachel would be transferred in a heartbeat.

There was a moment's silence before Rachel grew courageous enough again. She was certainly glad to be laying on her mom's lap, "...I, I called daddy today."

 _Oh boy._

"I asked him why it was hard to take care of me...he, he just said they didn't have what I needed and then he had to go and hung up." She sniffled and curled herself further in, "But I think that you always have time for me." She whispered.

"I do." Shelby's voice cracked, "Always love."

 _Those fucking men couldn't just be attentive once?!_

"A-and what if, what if one day you don't have what I need like with my daddies and then what'll happen to me?...I-I don't know why I need so much." She closed her eyes silent tears falling in the process, "I'm sorry."

The mother gently moved her daughter onto her lap, so their eyes could lock, "You don't ever have to worry about you needing too much from me."

"I just- I wanna stay with you forever." Rachel hugged her mother's neck tight, "I don't want to have to leave like I did with my daddies."

Shelby rocked her as if she was rocking an infant in her arms, "I'll always be here, Rachie. Always. And you aren't leaving. Ever. I promise you that."

Therapy. Shelby had toyed with the idea, but today had shown her that it could only benefit Rachel if she had her see a therapist.

Shelby was willing to go to the ends of the Earth to get the tiny, defeated 11 year old in her arms to believe her. For her child to grow confident and secure in her love.

…. … ….

Night had finally come in the Lopez household and Maribel was positively exhausted. Santiago would be on call all day and night, so she'd been left with taking care of business with Santana. The rest of the day she had made sure that both Quinn and Santana had gotten their homework done, ate all their dinner, cleaned up the living room, and were showered and ready for bed all before 8:30 pm, otherwise known as early bedtime.

When the time had come the preteen was on her bed waiting for her mom to come and tuck her in. She had opted to go pantless that night. And usually, Maribel stayed with her for longer at night after a spanking. Santana was glad she did because it always reassured her that her mami wasn't mad anymore.

"I'm sorry mami." Santana sleepily slurred against her mother's pants right on the brink of unconsciousness. Her cheek was snuggled up to her favorite blanket, the tip of it close to her mouth.

"I know m'hija. I know." The mother spoke softly.

And so Santana fell asleep, laid on her tummy, to her mother's beautiful voice singing her a Spanish lullaby. Tomorrow she might have to go over to Shelby and Rachel's house to apologize, and the thought kind of scared her. She didn't want to face the pair really. She half hoped that Rachel said no to the idea, but had a feeling that she'd have to do it sooner or later.

Maribel also stayed some time with Quinn when night came, silently running her hands through her hair as the preteen laid her head on her lap. It always made the blonde feel loved, and so Mrs. Lopez always tried to give her as much attention at bedtime as she could.

"Love you Maribel."

"Love you too Quinnie." Maribel said bending down to kiss the girl goodnight.

Finally, the tired mother made her way to her room to finally get some time to herself and sleep. Not of course before checking in on Santana. She smiled when she saw her child curled into a little ball. Her heart covered panties and tinged pink bum clear from the light coming from the hall.

"Buenas noches mi princesa." Maribel whispered, "Mami loves you."

…. …. ….

After having talked Rachel finished her homework at the kitchen table, while Shelby graded, then the pair watched a few episodes of Spongebob together. Not that Shelby enjoyed any of that. But it made Rachel laugh, and that sound really did make the mother's heart flutter.

Night had come and at around midnight Shelby's thoughts were finally winding down so she could sleep. She watched the little girl asleep cuddled into her side, finally at peace. Her hand still holding tightly onto Shelby's sleeping shirt.

She wasn't surprised when Rachel had asked if she could sleep in her bed tonight. In fact she had half expected it.

The woman was sat on her vanity removing her makeup when her daughter came in and sat on her bed. Shelby had been planning on going into her daughter's room, but it looked like she'd beat her to it.

"Can you grab the alcohol and gauze from my bathroom bug? We need to clean your cut."

Rachel frowned, "But ma-"

Shelby put the make up wipe down and turned around, "Non-negotiable Rach. It needs to be disinfected."

"It's gonna sting mommy!" Rachel whined.

Shelby sighed and got up herself, "Stay here." She ordered gently.

It took a few crocodile tears from her child, a warning tap on the girl's thigh to stop squirming, and one quick yelp from Rachel's mouth for the gauze to finally be clean.

"See, just a few seconds of pain." Shelby smiled then kissed her daughter's knee, "All better."

Rachel pouted as she looked at the new gauze on her knee, "I hate that stuff."

"Everyone hates that stuff." Shelby quipped, "Come on now bug, it's sleep time."

"Can I sleep with you?"

"Of course honey. Do you want a bedtime story or a song?" She asked knowing fully well that Rachel would want at least one of them.

Rachel thought for a moment, "Can we finish the book tonight mama?"

"We have two chapters. I suppose so."

Shelby was happy to see the wide smile that her answer gave her daughter.

And so the mother dutifully and lovingly read Rachel to sleep. It had been a hard day for her sweet girl, and she was happy that bedtime could be a moment of no inhibitions and quality time between mother and daughter.

Shelby heard her daughter whimper slightly in her sleep, so without hesitation she wrapped her arms around her and closed her eyes,

"I've got you baby girl. Mom's got you."

 **Hello! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please let me know what you think. It's length may mean that there are a lot more mistakes (sorry about that!). Also, for those of you wondering the potential love interest for Shelby will still be a part of the story. Big or small part, I still haven't decided.**


	11. Apologies for my Thoughts

**Here you go! It's a long one, so forgive me for any editing mishaps. I tried to catch all the errors, and I'm sure there's still some in there. Also shouts out to DARecruit for catching me writing Ashley instead of Amanda, lol. Appreciate that.**

 **Also, thank you for everyone who's been reviewing, messaging, and asking questions about this story. It warms my heart and gives me so much motivation. Y'all rock! I hope you like this one. Let me know your thoughts!**

Rachel sat at the kitchen table in front of an extremely shy Santana. A sight she was not used to seeing. The Latina preteen was wiggling in her seat and looking at her hands, not daring to look at her. Usually Santana had no issue looking her in the eye, toying with her emotions.

It was so weird to see her like this. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

When Shelby had told her about the fact that Mrs. Lopez wanted Santana to come over to apologize 2 days ago Rachel reluctantly agreed. She wanted to scream 'hell no,' but her mom said that it might really help her heal from it, whatever that meant, and the girl wanted nothing more then to get past all this. If it mean suffering through a forced interaction between Santana and her then so be it.

Rachel felt her mom's hands atop her shoulders. The small girl was thankful for the comfort.

Though the small brunette wished she could be doing this atop her mother's lap, where she knew she could hide in her mother's chest if she wanted to. Unfortunately that wasn't an option, but having her right behind her was the next best thing. And honestly, Santana was thinking the same thing. Her mami's lap sounded pretty comforting right now.

"M'hija dile lo que hablamos." Came Maribel's voice. The woman was off to the side, her arms across her chest as she stared her conrite daughter down.

The security Shelby was offering Rachel was nonexistent between her and San. It would come, Maribel was not a cold mother, but she wanted Santana to understand that she would do this on her own. She made Rachel feel vulnerable and alone and the girl needed to own up and face that herself.

Santana gulped, "Umm..I-I'm sorry for, for all the times I bullied you Rachel."

The smaller of the two preteens looked up. Rachel had known she was bullied, but hearing it from Santana hurt even more. It actually upset her.

"Why?" She almost whispered.

"What do you-what do you mean?" Santana asked, surprised that Rachel even interrupted her apology. She had thought it would be painful to get it all out, but she wasn't ready to answer questions.

"Why were you even so mean to me?"

Rachel felt her mother squeeze her shoulders gently. 'It's okay baby.' Rachel imagined that move saying, "You're okay.'

"What did I ever do to you?"

Shit. Santana felt her shoulders droop. Her mind raced for an answer. But she knew anything she said would be a pretty lame answer anyway.

"I-Amanda...She" Santana took a deep breath, "You didn't do anything. We just...we thought it was funny, and that was stupid. You were just always so….so smart and you always know everything, so we thought...I don't know. I-I'm sorry. I won't do it again. You didn't deserve it."

Rachel looked into Santana's eyes. She wanted to say that Santana was lying, but the girl looked genuine. The Latina no longer held the same power over her the way Rachel felt she used to, and it really unsettled the smaller brunette.

"I'm not gonna be friends with Amanda no more." Santana said barely above a whisper. She wasn't sure why she said that. It had just felt right. The Latina didn't really know if Rachel even cared, but there was some part of her that hoped it would somehow prove how much she really was sorry.

"Why not?" Rachel asked.

Santana looked down and shrugged, " 'cuz..She took it too far."

Rachel bit her lip. She thought about saying thank you for her and Quinn helping her out that day in the bathroom, but didn't quite feel like Santana deserved it.

"A-and Ms. Corcoran." Santana looked at the woman who she had come to love, "I-I'm really sorry that I hurt your daughter." She couldn't help but tear up.

Shelby offered the young girl a sincere smile, "We'll get through it San. Your family and you mean a lot to me."

"Is that all Santana?" Maribel asked her daughter.

The younger Lopez looked to her mom, a bit of blush on her cheeks "Si mami."

"Rachel," Maribel addressed, "I know that what my daughter did to you hurt, and I'm sure that her apology isn't enough to make up for it, but I hope that it's the beginning of you being able to forgive her." Both mothers looked at each other, "Shelby. Thank you for giving San and me the opportunity."

"Of course Maribel."

Both mothers wanted the same thing. Reconciliation.

Rachel watched silently as Santana stood up at her mother's behest. She stayed in the kitchen even as her mother kissed her atop her head and walked their two guests out.

Shelby closed their front door and took a deep breath. The tension of two upset preteens was finally gone.

Wait...where was her preteen?

"Rach?" She called to the kitchen . The girl was no longer sitting at the table.

With a long sigh the mother decided to clean up the kitchen a bit so as to give her baby girl some time alone before she walked up the stairs and into her room where she was confident she'd be.

Sure enough by the time she got there, Rachel was already in her nook where the window was surrounded by pillows, a book propped up on her knees and her headphones in.

 _She needs a haircut._ The mother thought as she saw the way her hair covered her face. But Rachel loved her long locks.

Shaking off the thought Shelby walked over and sat down in front of her. The 11 year old looked up and gave her a half hearted smile.

"Hey you." The mother said brushing her hand across her daughter's baby soft cheek. "You're almost done with that book I see. We're gonna have to go to the bookstore soon, aren't we?"

Rachel's eyes lit up. "Tomorrow?"

"Maybe." Shelby chuckled, "We might even be able to go this evening after your cousins leave."

Rachel closed her book and rested her back on a pillow, "When do they get here?"

"Maybe an hour?"

Shelby noticed real excitement in her daughter's eyes and it eased her. She wasn't sure if it was too much to have her family show up after Santana had come over, but Rachel looked genuinely up for it. Her brother had left his kids with Sarah for the night. Him and his wife Lauren were going to have a couple's night, and it'd been a while since Rachel got to hang out with them so Sarah figured there was no time like the present.

"How're you feeling kiddo?"

Rachel shrugged and played with the fray of the purple pillow in her lap. "It was weird."

"What was?"

"...to see Santana look like that."

"What do you mean, lovey?"

"She was so, so" Rachel couldn't quite pinpoint it, "I don't know, quiet. And guilty looking, I guess."

"I think she really meant that apology." Shelby replied.

Rachel closed her book and tucked her legs under her, "I think so too. I didn't think she was gonna mean it, but she did. That's why it was weird too maybe."

Shelby leaned in and kissed the girl's forehead, immensely proud of her "You were the bigger person by letting her come and apologize, Rach. I hope you know that."

Rachel cocked her head. She hadn't thought about it like that, "I was?"

"This is your home. Where you can be the most yourself, and letting someone into it who hurt you was really strong of you."

The tiny brunette smiled to herself, "...Mrs. Lopez was scary though."

This made Shelby laugh, "Well it was a serious situation and I'm sure she's not too happy with Santana right now."

Rachel furrowed her eyebrows as she thought about how her dads would've reacted to a situation like that, "I hope she's not too mad at her."

Shelby brought Rachel into a tight hug. Her compassionate cuddle bug.

"I'm sure Santana will be just fine babe."

The mother felt how tight Rachel held her, "You're okay bug." She whispered. Sometimes that's all it took to allay whatever thought was nagging at her girl.

Rachel nodded into the crook of her mother's neck. "I-I wonder how she's gonna act like now in school...Do you think she'll just ignore me?"

Shelby sighed and moved so she could see her daughter's beautiful, young face, "It might be a little odd between you two at first. A lot has happened."

"She has a good voice." Rachel murmured seemingly out of the blue, but that was something that stood out to Rachel, and she always imagined them dueling to see who had the best voice. Of course Rachel won every time.

Shelby looked at her daughter, confused, but impressed, "Really?"

"She used to be in choir, but dropped the class. I thought she had a good voice."

Shelby put an arm around her daughter and kissed the side of her head, "Maybe you should tell her that. I'm sure she'd appreciate it."

Rachel rolled her eyes, though her mom didn't see it. She was definitely not going to say that!

They stayed closed to each other enjoying their presence for a moment before Shelby spoke first,

"Now I need you to clean up around here a bit before your cousins come over."

The mother heard the tell tale groan of a child not wanting to do work and rolled her eyes.

"It won't take you too long." She let go of her child and stood her up with one last kiss to her forehead, "I'll be downstairs if you need me bug."

…. ….. …

Santana sat in her room glumly staring out the window. She didn't have much to entertain herself with. Her parents had pretty much taken anything fun. Well, she had books. But who read books anyway?

Quinn had gone to her house for the weekend. Her parents had a huge office party going and they wanted Quinn there to 'complete the family look' as Quinn explained to her, scoffing at her mother's words.

'It's bullshit.' The blonde also added.

The Latina preteen sighed and laid her head on the window. Plus, all this time doing nothing meant she had all this time to think. And the more she thought, the more she felt bad for treating Rachel so badly. Why the hell had she been so dumb to follow Amanda like that?

"M'hija?" Came her mother's voice.

Maribel came up the stairs to her very bored daughter looking rather sad.

When they had gotten home from Shelby's house Santana asked if they could watch a movie. It hurt her heart but Maribel reminded her that there was 'no tv' as part of her grounding.

Santana felt her eyes tear up, without saying another word she stomped up the stairs and into her room.

Maribel understood her baby's frustration, and she looked sadly up the stairs.

See, Santana would always ask to watch tv with her when she wanted some loving up. It gave her an excuse to cuddle into her mami. Now that she was older it wasn't cool to just sit and snuggle with your mom for no reason, duh. Well, she did that with her dad, but her dad was different. Santana saw Maribel all of the time, her dad was always working.

But this time Maribel had said 'no.'

God, she hated seeing her princesa so deflated. But she was being punished and they had to hold to their punishment.

"Tienes hambre?" Maribel asked her daughter. It was clear Santana was mad the moment she'd opened the door, "I made lunch."

Santana just shook her head, not bothering to look at her mom.

Maribel frowned, but decided to tell her daughter what she'd wanted to say in the car, "I'm proud of you mi niña. You spoke from your heart today and I know that must've been hard."

Santana only nodded, not moving her head from where it laid on the window.

'Give her space.' Maribel thought, ' Give her time.'

"You know I love eating lunch with you on the weekends, m'hija. I'll be downstairs if you want to join, okay?"

"Okay." Santana muttered.

It wasn't until the door closed that Santana turned to the door with eyes narrowed. She hated feeling all emotional like this!

The girl threw the pillow by her towards the floor and moved to lay to her bed, crashing down onto it, her hair splaying all over.

She hoped to be able to fall asleep, at least then she could ignore the boredom, but she wasn't tired at all. Although she was hungry and her stomach grumbling was a clear indication of that.

NO.

She was _not_ going to go down there after her mom denied watching tv with her. She just wanted to watch a movie!... , maybe end up laying her head on her mami's lap. But whatever, seems like her mother didn't want that!

30 minutes had passed and another knock came to her door.

"Come in." The girl grumbled knowing it was her mom. Who knows, maybe she'd brought some laundry for her to fold or something. At this point, she would take that job if it meant doing something other than sitting.

"I brought you a sandwich. You have to be hungry, Sani."

'Thank God!' The preteen thought as she watched her mother move towards her and put it on the girl's lap. She didn't want to go downstairs, but she sure was hungry.

Maribel walked out once more with a long sigh. Her daughter was stubborn, but she wouldn't let her starve over it.

…. …. …..

"Rach!" The girl heard her mother yell up the stairs, "Come say hello!"

The girl was still up in her room. She had finished cleaning but got caught up in a Youtube binge of cover songs. She threw her phone to the side and hopped off her bed, "Coming!"

"Hi auntie Sarah."

The woman smiled at her tiny niece. "Hey Rachie bug." She enveloped her in a deep hug that Rachel always thought was very close to her own mama's hugs. "How're you doing bub?"

"I'm okay, I guess." Rachel answered honestly. She wasn't great, but she wasn't horrible. Okay seemed like a happy medium.

Sarah rolled her eyes. "Quite descriptive. Glad we had this talk."

"Where's Emma, Lewis, and Andrea?" Rachel asked completely disregarding her aunt's jab.

"They're coming. They were trying to fish Emma's phone, it had fallen somewhere under her seat. "

Just as she said it, Lewis and Andrea, the youngest of the three came in and ran to the girl, hugging Rachel tightly.

"Rachie!" Lewis and Andrea squealed. Their newest cousin was also their nicest cousin, she didn't seem to mind playing with them the way Emma did, and the two 8 year olds really appreciated that.

In reality, Rachel enjoyed the games. She never had a chance to explore that part of childhood, and getting to do it with her two youngest cousins was something she gladly welcomed.

"Hey Rach." Emma said much more nonchalantly as she walked in last.

"Hi." Rachel smiled, still a little bit shy around her.

The 8 year old twins were hugging their "auntie Shel" tightly when Shelby brought Emma in for just as fierce a hug, "Come here. You know you want a hug too Em." She joked. Emma rolled her eyes but accepted it.

"I'll take your coat Aunt Sarah." Rachel offered. Sarah beamed at the helpfulness, "Thank you sweetie."

She then turned to her own kiddo, her face sterner than it once was,

"Emma, hand the phone over. I let you use it on the ride here."

"Mmmoooommm." Emma immediately whined, "Come on ple-"

Sarah put a hand up, "I don't want to hear it. We talked about this. Now hand it over." She extended her hand and the girl forked it over rather firmly into her mom's hands.

"Fine, here." She growled out, taking a seat on the couch rather petulantly one moment later.

Shelby rose an eyebrow. Emma seemed to be getting gutsier every time she saw her. And the younger of the Corcoran sisters knew that the preteen had to either rein that attitude in, or Sarah would do it for her. Just like their own mother had done with them many times.

Shelby caught Rachel coming back from the coat closet, "Rach, can you take the twins upstairs with you?"

"What about Emma?" Rachel caught sight of the girl who looked upset. Emma heard and was about to stand up but her mother stopped her.

"She'll be up in a sec. You three go." Sarah almost ordered.

Rachel caught the hint and ushered the other two up, "Come on guys, let's go to my room."

"Can we play monopoly?" Andrea asked.

"Sure." Rachel easily complied.

Sarah's eyes darted immediately onto her daughter. She put up her finger to emphasize her point,"Young lady, drop that attitude. I'm warning you now. Don't let that sour mood get you into trouble with me because you really won't like that."

Emma jutted her chin up and looked away, Only to feel her mother's hands lock onto her chin and move it towards her.

"Thin ice little girl. Thin. Ice."

The 12 year old wanted to cringe at the words. She knew she had been nothing short of annoying the whole morning, but her parents had taken away softball! She was missing an entire game. Who wouldn't be upset?

"Cool off." Her mother said in a softer voice, "and when you're in a better mood go with your cousins."

No answer.

"You hear me Emma Lawrence?"

"Yes ma'am." She grumbled out quietly.

"Excuse me?"

Emma took a deep breath and looked into her mom's green eyes, knowing her mother wanted a clear answer.

Her lip quivered slightly and her eyes softened. As much as she hated being grounded, she hated how tough her mom could get with her. And even more than that she hated being so at odds with her parents. But Emma had too much pride to admit that. Yes, the 12 year old would rather be brought down her high horse kicking and screaming before she admitted that she wanted things to get back to normal.

"Yes ma'am." She said more clearly.

Sarah caught the change in demeanor and sighed. It'd been like pulling teeth this week with her daughter. A constant fight. It was in the brief lapses though, when Emma's hardened look tempered, that Sarah could still see her little Emmie that craved her mom and dad's approval.

"Thank you." She whispered standing back up, "Aunt Shel and I will be in the kitchen."

Emma nodded as she leaned her head on one of her hands. 'Stupid parents.' She mumbled in her head, 'Stupid me for ditching.'

"What was that about?" Shelby immediately asked pouring Sarah a cup of coffee.

Sarah laid her chin on her hand just like Emma had done, "She's mad at me. We grounded her from softball and her phone for the weekend."

"Oooohhh. Double whammy." She pushed the coffee towards her older sister.

"Exactly." Sarah muttered, "She'd gotten detention this week. She got caught trying to ditch class with her friends."

"Where was she trying to go?"

"The back of the bleachers apparently."

Shelby scoffed, "She risked getting into trouble for the back of the bleachers?"

Sara laughed, "Not her smartest move for many reasons."

As Shelby fixed her own mug of coffee, her phone dinged. Sarah caught a glimpse of the notification and was peaked with interest immediately.

"Umm, little sister, who is Paul?" Her voice rose an octave, "He says 'hello!' with a smiley face."

Shelby put her cup down and snatched her phone away from Sarah, "Are you snooping? Isn't that unethical as a lawyer?"

Sara rose her hands up, "Hey, it's not my fault your notifications are public like that. And why are you getting so defensive? Hmmm?"

Shelby rolled her eyes knowing her sister had cornered her. "Do you remember, ummm, rollie pollie Paul?"

The older woman's eyes widened, "Chubby kid that was Liam's younger brother?!"

"Yeah, him." Shelby pocketed her phone, making a mental note to text him back later, "Well I ran into him and let's just say he's not chubby or geeky anymore."

Sarah scoffed, "Wait, are you two dating? Damn sis, move quick, I see."

"Are you crazy? We're not dating! I haven't seen him since that day I saw him. He just texts me occasionally, and I'll respond...sometimes. A hello, how was your day. Hope everything is going well, sort of thing."

There was also the occasional flirtatious text, but she wouldn't divulge that and have her sister tease her about it.

"So you're playing hard to get." Sarah surmised rather definitively.

Shelby felt herself getting frustrated, "Hard to ge-no! We're not in high school Sarah. Jesus."

"So...you're not interested in him?"

Shelby shook her head, "No, well, maybe. I don't know. He's sweet. But I'm busy. I'm a full time mom. A teacher and a coach. I don't have time to date. And Rachel needs a lot. You know that. I don't know if she's ready for me to have my time taken by someone else."

Sarah took a sip of her coffee, "You're right I suppose. But your happiness is important too Shelby."

"My happiness is with Rachel right now. And if there's anything that happens with him it would be friendship first."

The older sister couldn't help but smile wide, "Can I see a picture?"

"Maybe if you didn't interrogate me, I would've shown you."

"Awww. Come on Shelbs!"

Shelby groaned as she took her phone back out and clicked on her Facebook app. When she handed the phone over Sarah's jaw dropped, "Wow. He certainly isn't a rollie pollie anymore."

The younger sister laughed, "You're so rude!"

"What? It's true!" She put the phone down and slid it back to Shelby, "Sure know how to pick 'em sis."

"You're the worst." Shelby muttered, shaking her head playfully.

The two women enjoyed a long sip of their drink. Sarah decided not to push Shelby anymore. She knew her younger sister. She was like a wall when she wanted to be, and it looked like Paul was going to be one of those subjects where Shelby would be short with her answers. At least for now. If she got their mom involved they could definitely get some answers, but Sarah wasn't cruel.

"So how was it this morning. With Rachel and Santana?" She changed the subject, "Is Rach, okay?"

Shelby blew on her own hot mug, "I think she is. She seemed rattled by how different Santana was acting with her."

"I still can't believe that. Santana plays soccer with Emma. She's a spitfire and has a hothead but it still seems out of character."

"I feel the same way." Shelby added glumly, "But she did seem genuinely sorry. She's a good girl, and I think her and Rachel might come around, but I'm not forcing it."

"What about that other girl, Amanda. What about her?"

Shelby's eyes immediately darkened. If she could get her hands on that girl, "I managed to have Rachel's schedule changed, so she's no longer in class with her, but they'll still see each other around at lunch. She was suspended for some time and is on lunch duty apparently afterwards. God, Sarah, I wanted to hurt that child. I never thought I would say that, but I really did when I got to that school if I would've seen her..."

The older sister chucked knowingly, "That's the love of a mother Shel."

"And, you know, I-I think I found a therapist for Rachel."

Sarah's eyes slightly widened, "So you're going through with it?"

Shelby bit her lip, "I've been trying so hard to do it on my own, but I know she'll really benefit from it. Her nightmares, her worry about her dads, the bullying. It's not fair to have her deal with it all alone. She needs it."

"Have you mentioned it to her?"

Shelby leaned her head on her hand and took in a breath, "I need to tell her. I set up an appointment and I'll cancel it if I need to, but she really needs this Sarah. I'm sure of it."

Sarah moved and wrapped an arm around her sister, "You're doing the right thing Shel…you're doing the right thing."

… …. ….

When Emma came into Rachel's room, the rest of her cousins had already started a game of monopoly.

The 12 year old sat next to Rachel and sighed, "Y'all really like this game?" She muttered.

Rachel shrugged, "I think it's entertaining."

"Yeah!" Andrea added, "What Rach said." She stuck her tongue out at Emma who only grinned and did the same.

"Okay baby A. don't cop an attitude."

"I'm not a baby!" She argued.

Emma just laughed, "I'm just messing, chill 'Drea."

"Wanna be my advisor? I think the twins are taking me for all I'm worth here."

"Sure."

"Why did aunt Sarah take your phone?" Rachel asked once the girl got comfortable next to her.

Although the closest in age of the four cousins, Rachel thought Emma was leagues ahead of her. She seemed so confident and well, cool.

Emma shrugged moving Rachel's piece for her, "I tried ditching class and got caught. Mom and dad made me miss my softball game today and they took my phone. It's so unfair!"

"Was it a big game today?"

"Just a regular season game. But I'm the best pitcher, and if my team loses it'll be all my parent's fault." She threw her head on the back of Rachel's bed, "It fuckin sucks." She grumbled feeling aggravated all over again.

Andrea lifted her head up immediately, "Ooooo! You said the f word!"

Emma's eyes widened and she shot up, "Shhh. 'Drea don't say anything, come on!"

Rachel giggled. It was pretty funny how quickly Emma reacted to that.

"Give us two dollars and we won't tell aunt Sarah." Lewis added.

"Are you two seriously blackmailing me?!"

"I think they are Em." Rachel laughed.

Emma's eyes narrowed, "If you tell my mom, then I'll just have to tell your mom who _actually_ broke that painting in your living room. You know the one you said just fell off the hinges and I totally vouched you two for."

'Wow. Rachel thought. 'That's real leverage right there.'

Lewis frowned. Damn! Plan foiled. He was already dreaming about the creamsicle he was going to buy from the icecream man with that dollar.

"Meanie." Andrea pouted.

Emma lifted an eyebrow, "RIght back at ya. Tattle tales." She turned to Rachel who looked slightly impressed, "You have to know when to play your good hand Rach, especially with these two."

Rachel stayed quiet for a moment and wondered how long it would take for her to finally be able to have that same relationship where there were inside jokes, stories, and secrets that bound her between the cousins. It kind of sucked to enter a family 11 years into it. Actually, after thinking some, it really sucked. It sucked to always be the odd one out, to have to be filled into stories. It sucked that no one really knew her likes and dislikes, except her mom of course. Her aunts and grandparents knew everything about her cousins, but not her. It sucked that Emma was cool and she was not. That Emma never had to deal with a girl having to come to apologize for bullying her. Emma was never pushed into a bathroom stall. No...all of that happened to Rachel.

And Rachel tried so hard. All of the time. But it was like it wasn't enough.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Emma asked when she saw Rachel frown and stand up from the game.

"You guys can finish playing. I-I need to go do something."

The 3 cousins looked at each other slightly confused as their cousin left her room swiftly. Everything had been just fine a second ago, or so they thought.

Lewis was the first one to break out of the moment, "Well let's keep playing. I wanna win."

Emma blinked a bit. Rachel had seemed upset, "You two keep going. I'm gonna check on Rach."

"Well you can't just leave the game! It'll ruin it."

"No it won't. Just pretend I went bankrupt or something. I don't know. Do whatever you want." She stood up ignoring her baby cousins grumbles and went in search of Rachel.

Emma didn't have to go far as she made out Rachel sitting on her aunt's bed through the crack of the door.

She thought about going downstairs and getting her aunt Shelby but maybe Rachel didn't want that. Sometimes parents weren't always the answer. Emma knew that from experience.

Meanwhile Rachel was stuck in a prison of her thoughts.

Unsure of what to do 12 year old Emma took a deep breath and walked in, "R-rachel?" She said opening the door, "You okay, dude?"

Rachel was sitting at the center of her mom's bed fighting all the stupid thoughts in her head. She had wanted to be alone but now Emma was here.

"I'm fine. I just, umm, was waiting for my dads to call." She lied.

But Emma was no fool, "You left your phone in your room." She easily hopped up onto the bed with Rachel and sat criss cross applesauce, "So what's up? Did we do something to make you mad?"

It seemed she wasn't leaving either. Rachel sat up and mirrored her cousin's pose. "N-no. It's nothing you did. I'm just…"

 _Messed up. Lonely. An outcast._

"I'm fine." Rachel shook her head, and put on a show face, "Just a passing thought. Come on, let's go."

Emma felt like she'd just received whiplash with how quickly her cousin's mood changed.

"Rach, are you serious? Come on, you can tell me."

"It's nothing." Rachel replied hopping off the bed.

"You're lying." Emma crossed her arms, secure in her hunch.

"I'm not!" Rachel yelled with a stamp of her foot.

"Whoa." Emma lifted her hands in surrender, "Geez. I'm just trying to help."

"I'm fine now." Rachel argued, "And I don't need you trying to analyze me. I already have a mom for that."

"I never said I was your mom. You're just acting weird and I was checking that you were okay, chill!"

Rachel felt her fists tighten, "I am NOT weird. Don't call me that!"

Emma scoffed, "Jesus Rachel. Just...whatever dude." The frustrated girl pushed herself off the bed and made her way out of the room, "I'm going with the twins because at least I get when they freak out on me."

She left leaving Rachel standing at the center alone.

The 11 year old groaned loudly in anger and kicked at her mother's bed. She hadn't meant to make Emma get mad at her. She didn't want Emma to leave just like that. But she also didn't want to admit her insecurities.

 _God, why are you so difficult?!_

Rachel kicked at the bed again. She kicked it over and over again. "So stupid." She mumbled to herself, "So, so stupid."

Eventually she'd felt better after getting her momentary anger out, what came after was the guilt. Emma was just trying to be a good cousin. And there she had to go and ruin it.

So Rachel swallowed her pride, squared her shoulders and walked back to her room, but her cousins were no longer there.

She looked out the window and could see that they had started a game of soccer. Rachel sighed. She had just gotten the courage to go back to her room, now she had to walk all the way outside.

Carefully, the girl crept down the stairs but was met with her mom and aunt in the living room. Exactly what she was trying to avoid.

"Hey kid. You don't look changed to play soccer." Sarah said when she saw Rachel.

"Huh?"

"Emma said you were changing, which is why you didn't come downstairs with them." Her aunt clarified.

Shelby looked at her daughter skeptically, "Bug, are you alright?"

Rachel looked down at her pleated skirt and bare feet. "Oh. Yeah. Yeah, I'm okay. I-I went to the bathroom and then I just forgot."

The girl went back up to change before the adults could ask her anything else. She didn't understand why Emma had covered up for her like that. Wasn't she mad at her?

Changing into a pair of running shorts, a black Dri Fit tshirt, and a pair of sneakers she zoomed down to avoid more questions, making it safely outside where her cousins were kicking the ball around and taking it away from each other.

She caught Emma's eye roll when she saw her. It made Rachel tense up. She couldn't tell if Emma was mad at her or not, and it was confusing her. So instead of joining them she sat off on the porch and watched them, her knees pulled up to her chest.

"Oh! Lost the ball again little Lewis!" Emma playfully mocked him as she ran down the yard, dribbling the ball away from both her cousins chasing her.

Lewis yelled Rachel's way when one of his defensive attacks was unsuccessful. "Rachel, come play! So you can take it from Emma!"

"Yeah! You're bigger and faster!" Andrea added her two cents.

Emma stopped abruptly and kicked the ball up to her hands.

"Hey!" The twins yelled, but she ignored.

Emma held the ball and turned to Rachel, "Come on Rach. Come play."

The eldest cousin knew that Rachel was well, different from them. She didn't know much of her background just that her dads weren't very nice to her, and her mom told her that sometimes Rachel struggled understanding things about family that came easy to them. Something as simple as being able to mess up and still be loved by your parents. That really struck the young girl.

Rachel looked at her almost nervously.

"It's just soccer, and you're good at it, come on!" She pushed her.

Rachel sighed and stood up. She didn't like the idea of playing when she was so unsure of how Emma was feeling towards her. And honestly, how she was feeling towards Emma.

"Finally!" Lewis said when his cousin walked towards them. Rachel stood next to him and smiled.

"Alright." Emma dropped the ball and stopped it with her right foot, "Lewis and Rachel. You're a team. Andrea and me will be a team."

"Who's gonna be our goalies?" Andrea asked.

"We don't need none." Emma answered, "If you make it past the cones it's an automatic goal. It'll just be like keepaway but with four people and not two. First team to get to three goals wins."

Rachel tilted her head. A challenge. She was competitive. And she wasn't too bad at soccer. Emma played far more than she did but Rachel had the advantage of having played with her high school cousins from time to time, and by herself a lot as well.

She kicked the ball to Rachel, "Y'all can start."

The small brunette girl narrowed her eyes, not liking the smugness in her cousin's tone. As if she knew that they could still win. "Fine then."

The moment the ball moved, the gang was off. But after a few minutes of healthy competitive play, it became clear to Lewis and Andrea that their older cousins were hogging the ball, and just keeping it away from each other.

"Pass the ball Em!" Andrea yelled frustrated, "I'm playing too you know!"

"Come on Emma. Get it." Rachel taunted slightly enjoying zooming past as she dribbled the ball to her end. Emma came up and fought her way towards the ball but Rachel did a quick turn that Lindsay had taught her, and slightly shoved Emma's shoulder. Using that moment she kicked it in and made it into the goal. "YES!" She yelled proudly.

The score was now 2-2.

In the midst of her celebration though Emma took the ball and ran with it, her younger cousin close behind. Rachel managed to catch up but Emma dribbled the ball between Rachel's leg, caught up to it and kicked it right into her goal.

3-2.

Emma had won.

"YES! WE WON!" Andrea yelled from the porch where Lewis and Andrea had moved to.

"Shut up, you didn't even play at the end. Neither of us did." Lewis grumbled.

"Better luck next time Rach." Emma said playfully after taking some long breaths, "That was fun though."

But Rachel was not in the mood for things to end just yet. She wanted to win. She had to beat Emma. Her cousin had the upper hand in everything. She just wanted this one win. She needed it. It felt like she'd been losing at more things than just this game lately.

"No. Let's keep playing. Whoever gets to 5!"

Emma's eyebrow shot up, "Rach I'm tired."

"Then you're forfeiting. I win."

"What? No! I already won. We said whoever gets to 3."

"No!" Rachel yelled, " _You_ said whoever gets to 3. I never agreed to that. We didn't shake on it."

"Are you serious?" Emma sputtered, "It's a dumb game Rachel."

"Fine, whoever gets to 4. You're one away already! Come on."

The 12 year old sighed heavily, "Jesus, fine then. I'll win again. Here." She kicked the ball Rachel's way.

And off they went.

"We wanna PLAY!" Andrea yelled standing up.

"Right after this!" Rachel called back.

"Dumb big kids." Andrea muttered sitting back down next to her brother.

Just as the little girl sat down Emma let out a high pitched scream.

"Shit!" The 12 year old yelled right after, "You pushed me Rachel!"

The smaller brunette shook her head, "I was just trying to get the ball!"

Lewis and Andrea immediately ran inside, the two older cousins completely missing when they did so.

Emma held onto her ankle, "I think I sprained it or something." She bit through her teeth, tears threatened to fall from the pain. She looked up angrily to Rachel, "It was just a stupid game!"

Rachel immediately felt bad. "L-let me help you."

"No!" Emma pulled away when Rachel bent down, "Just leave me alone." She sat up slightly and massaged her ankle.

"It-it was an accident!" Rachel pleaded.

"No, you turned into a competitive freak and pushed me so hard I twisted my ankle!"

"Don't call me a freak!" Rachel yelled back suddenly mad herself, "I'm not a freak!"

"It's just a word Rachel, god!"

"What happened?!" Sarah came out first with Shelby right behind her.

Lewis and Andrea came in running telling them that the girls were playing soccer and Emma had really hurt herself.

Sarah immediately bent down and helped her hurt daughter up,"I-I think it's sprained." Emma explained through a watery voice trying to force herself not to cry. She and her mom were supposed to be upset with each other after all, although right now she was willing to throw that to the wayside so her mom could make her feel better.

Meanwhile, Shelby walked over to her own kid, "Rachel-"

"It was an accident!" The girl immediately defended herself.

But Emma's eyes snapped up as her mother was helping her stand, "Yeah right! Aunt Shelby don't believe her. She was crazy competitive and pushed me, and pulled on my shirt til I fell!"

"Rachel, is that true?" Shelby turned to her daughter, a stern gaze fixed on her. The mother had known she was competitive, but this was something she had not expected.

"Let's get you inside, sweetheart." Sarah spoke calmly, knowing that Shelby needed to talk to Rachel, but Emma also needed to calm down, "We'll set you on the couch and put some ice on it."

Rachel felt her heartbeat at a million miles hours as she stood in the middle of the yard. She looked at her mother, and tried to make a run for it but Shelby had read her thought before it became action and put a firm hand on her shoulder, "You're not going anywhere. But you will tell me what happened."

"It was an accident! I didn't mean to hurt her, I was just trying to win!"

"Rachel," Shelby stated calmly as she slowly guided her daughter towards the porch, "being so determined to win that you hurt someone in the process is not okay."

The 11 year old felt tears sting her eyes, "Of course you're siding with her!" She yelled at her mother, ripping her arm from Shelby.

"Young lady." The mother warned a hand moving straight to her hip, "Watch. Your. Tone."

"No!" Rachel stomped her foot, "I don't care!" And with that the 11 year old took off inside, leaving a shocked Shelby by the porch steps.

Shelby took a moment to herself before following the girl. She was trying to wrap her head around why her daughter had acted out so harshly...maybe she shouldn't have let the family come over after their morning with the Lopezes.

"Did you see where Rachel went?" Shelby asked her sister who had Emma laying on the couch, her ankle elevated. Lewis and Andrea were watching TV, with their stomachs laid out on the floor.

"I didn't see her come through here. I thought it was both you and her coming inside when the door opened.

"She said the 's' word twice!" Lewis exclaimed.

"Lewis, stop tattling!" Sarah chastised, the boy frowning right after. He wasn't the one that said a bad word!

Shelby looked to her sister, her eyes showing a hint of anger. Rachel sure was digging herself into a deeper hole.

Meanwhile Sarah shook her head trying to wave off Lewis's comment, "It was just the word stupid. Nothing more than that. I thought you were with her, else I would've said something."

The upset mother took the stairs towards her daughter two steps at a time. She tried to calm herself knowing that growing angry would not help the situation.

Not bothering to knock she opened the door to the scene of her upset daughter pouting on the floor at the end of her bed. Her knees were pulled tight to her chest and she was hugging her legs, "I don't want to talk to anyone." Rachel almost growled when she saw Shelby at the door, "Go away!"

Shelby closed the door to the room and walked up to her daughter, bending her knees to reach her kid's level. But Rachel hid her face into her arms and knees, as if that would make her disappear from the situation.

"Rachel, look at me." Shelby directed sternly, "You are upset, and I understand that. But doing this isn't helping you."

"No!" Rachel moved her legs out and kicked twice. Shelby had to move to avoid getting hit, "Take Emma's side! You know you want to!" The girl pounded the floor, "Take her side! And let me stay here!"

She wanted to be angry damn it! There was so much for her to be angry for! Let her be angry!

And boy did Shelby want to bend her daughter over, pull her shorts down and dole out a few good spanks that would put a stop to the girl's outburst quickly. She'd done it one or two times before already after all. It was a surefire way to get Rachel to come back to her senses. Her own mother would've told her that's what the girl deserved. Hec, her sister Sarah would've even thought the same thing.

But there was a voice in the back of Shelby's head that told her not to. A voice that told her it would only confuse her daughter more.

Reluctantly, she listened to that seed of doubt, then firmly put her hands on Rachel's arms and stood her up, "Let's go." She spoke strictly, leaving no room for gentleness.

"W-what are you doing?!" The 11 year old demanded, slightly confused. The girl tried to get away but Selby shook her head, "No Rachel!" She rose her voice. It made the girl momentarily stop. Her mom rarely used that voice on her. Her pause allowed the mother to explain herself,

"You earned yourself a timeout. Let's go."

Rachel dug her heels into the carpet, "N-no!" She begged. God, she hated timeouts. Sitting in a that dumb chair and not having anything to distract her was the worst! "I don't want to! Lemme stay in my room!"

Shelby was not having it with the tantrum. She turned to her squirmy and obstinate daughter, "Rachel Corcoran! Either you walk down these stairs and into the kitchen willingly, or I will spank that bottom twice then carry you there! Your choice."

Rachel shrunk at the threat. Her cousins were down there. Having them listen to her mom spank her butt then get carried to a timeout chair was not exactly dignified.

Feeling like she had no choice she reluctantly agreed to walk, albeit with a scowl, downstairs and into the kitchen.

Her mother grabbed a chair from the table and turned it towards a wall. "I don't want to!" Rachel almost yelled. Shelby kept her cool. Something her own mother had told her was key to parenting.

"I'll come back in 15 minutes, Rachel." She still held firmly onto her daughter's arm as she squirmed around, "If you're not ready to talk calmly then I'll give you more time to let yourself calm down." Shelby explained to her upset daughter in an even tone, even though she was itching to yell in frustration.

The girl crashed down onto the chair and folded her arms across her chest. As Shelby was walking out Rachel kicked the wall in front of her. Her mother chose to ignore it though. And the fact that Shelby didn't say anything to her after that infuriated Rachel more. Why wasn't her mom coming back, damn it?!

Shelby walked into the living room and took a deep breath.

"Maybe we should go." Sarah said. They had heard what had just happened between the room and the kitchen, and all parties including Emma were feeling a bit bad.

"No." Shelby said rather determined, "I would like her to apologize to Emma."

'That's not gonna happen.' Emma thought.

As Rachel sat in the chair wallowing in her thoughts, she heard Lewis and Andrea fighting to sit on Shelby's lap as they decided what movie to watch.

'That was her mom's lap.' She thought sadly, kicking the wall once more.

It wasn't fair!

Before the movie started Shelby went back into the kitchen. She moved to kneel by her daughter. Her eyes were red. Rachel had cried some while sitting there and it hurt Shelby's heart to know that her kiddo was alone dealing with her emotions.

She wished she could wrap her up in her arms at that moment, but she couldn't do that just yet.

"Rachel, are you ready to talk yet?" Her voice was kind now, not upset like it had been before the 11 year old noticed.

Although the tiny brunette wanted to jump out of that chair, she was also too stubborn to want to talk with anyone in that house.

The mother sighed when she received nothing but a scowl out of her daughter.

"15 more minutes." Shelby said softly. The mother saw the big, wide eyes that Rachel had given her. She'd never been in timeout for that long! But then again, she'd never stayed so damn stubborn.

"B-but mama-" Watery chocolate eyes begged up at Shelby.

The mother kept a strict gaze, "Are you ready to speak calmly?"

Rachel shook her head sharply and looked away from her mother. Damn it! Just let her go already!

"Then your timeout isn't over. I'll check on you in 15 minutes." Shelby assured her and stood back to her full height to leave.

It made the girl crazy to know that her mom just left her to go back into the living room with her cousins. She didn't want to be in the corner of the kitchen alone!

Rachel heard the movie start. Her little cousins were probably most certainly snuggled against her mom, and Emma probably was next to Aunt Sarah but here she was stuck in a stupid chair, facing a wall, all alone. Of course they'd have more fun without her! Tears sprang to her eyes once more.

She was just a nuisance.

' **You naughty brat.'** Leroy used to tell her.

A bratty nuisance.

Her anger gradually turned into fear. Fear of having messed up. Pushed too far. Sure she'd acted up before but this time she _hurt_ Shelby's niece. Like, actually, physically hurt her. That was a big deal. A major mistake. Not intentionally, but still.

Maybe now her mom would keep her at arms length the way her dads did because she was always way too much to handle. God, she couldn't believe she had let herself get that upset and be so rude to her mother and family. Why would they want to be around her after that?

The 11 year old tried hard not to sob. She covered her mouth to prevent herself from making noise.

She was startled back to the present by a hand placed on her back.

"Rachel. It's just me." This time the voice was softer.

Shelby could sense that her daughter had finally calmed herself, the even deeper reddened eyes that her baby donned spoke volumes to the mother.

"Are you feeling up to talk now?"

Rachel took a deep breath. She needed to be on her best behavior and make things right. In reality the girl just wanted to jump in her mom's arms and get a tummy rub but her mind was telling her that she didn't deserve it. That maybe her mother wouldn't give it to her becuase she'd been such a naughty brat. So why bother asking for the comfort in the first place?

She nodded slowly and looked up at her mother, "C-can I apologize to Emma first?"

Shelby smiled and gave Rachel her hand to hold onto, "Let's clean you up and then I'll take you back down."

Shelby was going to go into the bathroom with Rachel, and hopefully try and get some insight into her behaviour in the process, but the little girl slipped her hand away from her mom, "I-I got it." She almost whispered closing the door gently. She didn't deserve her mom's comfort. The way her dad used to say she didn't deserve to be spoiled the way she was.

' _You are so lucky Rachel! You don't understand how much you have. Yet here you are acting up! Sometimes I think you don't deserve to have any of it! You're not grateful for us, you're not grateful for the things we buy you. None of it! We should just take it away, maybe then you'll learn to appreciate!'_

Her daddy Leroy would always say things like that.

Then she'd find that he did take her things away. Sometimes he took Clifford and that really hurt. Other times he took all of her gadgets. The, other times he would just not communicate with her altogether. Ignoring her. The silent treatment. Rachel hated the silent treatment. During those times Hiram would sneak into her room and kiss her saying that Leroy just needed space and he'd come around.

But how was an 8 year old supposed to understand that her daddy needed space?

Her family now gave her a life that was leagues better than the one she had with her daddies, yet she was still just as rude and ungrateful. How could she?!

Shelby stood at the bathroom door slightly dumbfounded. She decided to wait for her kid and a few minutes later Rachel came out with a fresher face than before.

"Ready?"

Rachel nodded her head hung, too embarrassed to look at her mom. The woman could sense her daughter's shame. And that's when Shelby knew that her decision to not give Rachel that short spanking was the right one.

She sighed and took her daughter's hand bending down to her level and lifting Rachel's chin to meet her eyes, "You're alright sweetheart. We all make mistakes and have our moments. You and I will figure all that out later."

"I was bad." Rachel whispered, her eyes flitting down, "I'm sorry."

"You were upset and we're going to figure out why. But that doesn't make you bad."

Rachel bit her lip and looked up at her mother, guilt still written all over her, "Can I say sorry now?"

Slightly saddened by her daughter's guilt ridden reaction Shelby put a hand on her back, "Yes."

"Em, Rachel has something she needs to say." Shelby and Rachel stood by the couch. Rachel played with her fingers nervously and slightly embarrassed. She'd just gotten out of a stupid timeout and her older cousin knew about it.

Emma looked to Shelby and then to her mom who kissed the top of her head and got up from where she sat next to her, "Come sit Rach." Sarah offered kindly.

Rachel watched as her Aunt Sarah paused the movie and had the two youngest cousins move with her to the kitchen so she could make them some lunch.

She looked up at Shelby, unsure of the idea of being alone with Emma.

"We'll be in the kitchen so you two can talk it out, alright?"

Rachel frowned. Her mom was going to make her do it alone?

Shelby gave her a reassuring rub to her back, "I'll be right in there."

Rachel walked slowly over to Emma who had sat up a bit. The older girl looked slightly annoyed and it made Rachel more nervous than she already was.

She hadn't noticed but her mother had already slipped out into the kitchen. Now it was just her and Emma.

"Ummm...I'm-I'm sorry for pushing you Em. I-I mean it was an accident but only because I really wanted to beat you and I got caught up. I'm sorry."

The 12 year old sat up a bit more. She'd expected the apology to be forced the way most apologies amongst the cousins were. Parents forcing them to say sorry to one another. They'd still be mad at each other and they'd ignore one another until they eventually got over it. Typical cousin stuff.

But Rachel's was different. It meant something. It came from the heart.

"Guess we can cross soccer off the list of things we do together." Emma tried to quip, but Rachel's face fell into deep sadness.

"It was a joke Rach. I'm kidding." Emma assured her, slowly realizing how her cousin took things slightly more seriously than most people.

"Oh." Rachel managed to eek out.

"I'm, uhhh, I'm sorry for saying that you were acting like a freak."

Rachel looked at her surprised, no one ever apologized for calling her that.

"I don't _actually_ think you're a freak."

"I act weird sometimes I guess." Rachel spoke softly.

Emma shrugged, "Everyone's weird. Not just look at little L and Andrea, they're the true weirdos."

That finally got Rachel to relax a little and chuckle. "Yeah, I guess so."

Without noticing, her anxiety about the situation was dissipating as her eldest cousin unintentionally eased them into an authentic conversation.

"You know" Emma started looking nervous as she tried her best to be vulnerable. It wasn't her normal state. But while her Aunt Shelby was dealing with Rachel, her mom had reminded her that sometimes Rachel needed more assurance than most kids.

' _She's been through a lot of abandonment honey. Just remember that.'_

' _What do you mean? 'Cause her dad's right?'_

 _Sarah nodded, 'Well yes. And it seems really simple when you say it like that. But imagine actually experiencing it. You, Lewis, and Andrea got lucky. You've had a loving family from the start, even if we do get on your nerves." She smirked at her daughter who just rolled her eyes, "It took Rachel 11 years to find that. She's learning."_

 _Sarah saw the levers in her daughter's brain moving. She kissed the girl's forehead and felt her 12 year old lean into her. A moment of peace between their mother daughter battle of wills._

"I, umm, I wanted you to play with us because I just wanted you to feel comfortable. You were mad or whatever and I didn't like that." Emma admitted to her cousin, "I wanted to make you feel better. I'm guessing you were still upset and kinda took it out in the game," She managed to crack one more joke by the end, "And I guess my ankle too."

Rachel bit her lip and nodded, unsure of what to say next.

"So why'd you get so mad Rach?"

"I...I just, I felt." The 11 year old debated telling her truth, but there was something about the way Emma was talking to her that made her feel like she could say something and not get made fun of for being "sensitive."

"I'm always the odd one out. And when we were in my room and the way you play with Lewis and Andrea, I just, I felt that way. And, you guys are supposed to be my family, and I even feel that way with you guyd. The only people I don't feel that way completely with is my mom and my friend Kurt."

Emma frowned, "It doesn't change the fact that we're cousins though. And the more time we spend together the more chance we get to know each other. Like, now we have this story to tell about you spraining my ankle...you jerk."

Rachel saw the glint of glee in her cousin's eyes.

 _Jerk was playful. She didn't mean it._

The 11 year old squirmed, "I guess it'll take me getting used to everything."

"Just don't think so hard. I don't think I've ever met someone our age that thinks as hard as you do, dude."

Rachel shrugged. It was her curse she supposed.

The two cousins didn't know it, but Shelby had moved upstairs to grab her phone charger, but stopped to catch the end of the two's heartfelt apology.

Emma's offhand comment about thinking so hard struck a chord with the mother.

Rachel was a thinker.

She certainly overthought everything, but she was also, still, very much a little girl. Not only was she just 11 years old, but in so many ways she was living out her childhood in the comfort of their home. The childhood that her dads forced her out of, but Shelby let her explore and soak up.

She liked to draw and color while her stuffed Clifford dog sat securely in her arms. She liked to sit on Shelby's lap when watching tv, and fall sleep in her mama's bed to the tune of a bedtime story. The 11 year old still loved and giggled along to cartoons, and there were countless times that Shelby had to remind her to sit right because her panties were showing, or would just fix the girl's skirt or shirt for her altogether. A sign of her childish lack of inhibitions. And most of all, Rachel still thought of things as black and white. There was never a gray area, like life so many times had.

So, of course she wasn't equipped to deal with all of those thoughts and emotions reeling through her head all at once. It was no wonder that her tantrums and outbursts were as dramatic as they were. It was a child's reaction to the very real traumas and thoughts running through her baby girl's head.

Shelby looked at her phone's calendar. Her daughter's first therapist appointment was a month from now, but she would call to see if it could be moved up. She wanted more than anything, for Rachel to have peace of mind.

After the two oldest cousins talked it out, and Sarah and Shelby fed all of the kids a late lunch/early dinner, the mothers knew that it was time for Shelby and Rachel to have some alone time. The 11 year old was pretty much subdued after that. It was clear that there were no hard feelings between Emma and her, but it still felt like Rachel was walking on eggshells, even with the consistent promptings of the two youngest cousins.

"We should head out." Sarah spoke quietly to Shelby once the dishes were all done. All the kids were back in the living room. Rachel was in the lazy boy, while Emma was laid out on the couch her ankle tied to a bag of ice, with Lewis and Andrea laying on the floor, one by Rachel the other by Emma.

Shelby watched how engrossed into the movie every one of the kids were. The events of the day completely forgotten for a moment. "Let them finish the movie." She said.

They said their goodbyes and Rachel was given a million kisses by her aunt, Lewis and Andrea, and surprisingly a tight hug from Emma. "See you soon Rach. Text me."

' _Text me.'_

 _Did Emma see their relationship as something more than just forced? Not just cousins, but friends too?_ Rachel thought.

Shelby walked them out to their car and waited for the crew to leave before she went back in to her child.

Rachel had moved from the recliner to the couch. She felt tired from the events of the day. If she stayed on the couch any longer without stimulus she was sure she'd end up asleep.

Her legs were tucked up to her chest, and her head rested on it's side as her eyes focused on the screen. She'd watched the movie multiple times and had memorized the lyrics to all of the songs. She softly sang along to the words playing along with the credits.

'So what can I say except you're welcome.

For the tides, the sun, the sky.

Hey it's okay, it's okay, you're welcome.

I'm just an ordinary demiguy.'

She hadn't noticed her mom watching her with slight awe and love from the door. It always floored the mother to think that the tiny bundle on the couch was her baby.

Eventually Shelby walked over and sat next to Rachel, putting a comforting hand on her back, "That's one of my favorite songs off the track. It's so playful." She remarked.

"I like when Lin raps." Rachel responded with a small grin, "I know that part too."

"I've heard you sing right along with him, my little song bird."

Rachel snuggled back into the couch letting her mom's soft rubs on her back ease her. But it wasn't long until she tensed up thinking about how rude she'd been to Shelby. She needed to fix that too.

Shelby felt the tension and sighed. Without hesitation she paused the credits and patted her lap, "Would you like to come here bug?"

Rachel sat up but shook her head. She wished she could say yes. Her mom was wearing her comfortable black sweatpants that were soft to the touch and the maroon hoodie whose strings Rachel loved to play with when cuddled to her mom.

Shelby lifted an eyebrow, "Are you sure, lovey?"

"I'm okay here." Rachel whispered very unconvincingly.

Wanting to respect her daughter's choice Shelby didn't push. "Rach, I know there was a lot going through your mind today. And it all really confused you and maybe your heart and your mind weren't sure what to do with it. Do you think that's accurate?"

The girl was looking down at her bare feet- her mom had made her take her socks off because they were dirty- She nodded.

Rachel wasn't sure how her mom knew that, it was kind of creepy that she did, but didn't dwell on it. She'd already dwelled on much too many things that day, and it had exhausted her emotionally and mentally.

"Do you think that's part of the reason that you got so upset?" Shelby asked, "There was so much happening in your head?"

Rachel tucked her legs under her, "I-I got mad, and, and I wanted to stay mad, and it felt like everyone was against me." She sniffled a bit as her emotions worked up.

"What started all of it? Santana's visit?"

Rachel shrugged, but her mother wouldn't budge, keeping her stare until the preteen gave in, "I don't know...I was upstairs with Emma, Lewis, and Andrea and it kinda just hit me that I could never be as close as they are because they just got to know me, and that made me feel like a loser all over again. And, and then I just thought about all the times I was the weirdo, and how I'm always the weirdo. And I thought about Amanda's and her friends and got upset all over again."

"Oh love." Shelby moved closer and put a hand on her daughter's. She didn't want to push affection if it wasn't what her child wanted at the moment.

"Emma told us she tried to talk to you?" Shelby prompted carefully, hoping not to have her shut down.

Rachel bit her lip, "Y-yeah, and she just kept saying I freaked out, and that made me mad because I'm not a freak. Amanda called me that and other kids too. I'm not a freak."

"You're right. You're not kiddo." Shelby assured.

"So when I went outside and they asked me to play, I said yeah because I like soccer, but then I just got really focused on winning. I just, I needed to win, mama. It felt like I needed to win. I never win. I always lose." Her eyes were watery and red now as she looked at her mother's own glossy eyes, "So I...had to. I had to win."

Shelby looked to the ceiling to try and keep her tears from falling. But Rachel let a few tears fall, "Mommy?" She couldn't help the sob that escaped her mouth.

"Rachie, what's wrong?"

"Do you," She hiccuped, "Do you still want to hold me?"

"What?" Shelby couldn't hide the shock, "Sweetheart, of course! Why wouldn't I want that?"

Rachel shook her head once more, even though her tears kept falling, "But do-do you think I deserve to be held after being so bad?"

The girl hugged herself and cried into her knees.

"Rachel, honey. Please look at me. You have to look at me."

Her mother hadn't said anything yet, and it scared the girl. Would she tell her something similar like her fathers? No, she couldn't. Shelby was different. Shelby was her mama.

Finally, her head popped back up.

"I love you so much. And I remember telling you that it doesn't matter what you do, my love won't change. Then you asked me if I would always hold you and I said yes. Nothing will change that. Yes, you made some bad decisions today with the way you acted. That's why you got a timeout. And we need to work on getting you to have a better outlet, but that doesn't make you bad, it doesn't make you unwanted, sweetie. You're my baby, Rachel. That's what you are."

The stoic Glee coach, hardened teacher, but current ball of love of a mother opened her arms and motioned Rachel with her hands, "Princess, come here with mommy, love."

Rachel launched herself into her mother, quickly moving onto her lap so she could lay her head between her mother's neck and chest, "I-I didn't mean to be bad!" She cried once more.

Shelby rocked the child in her arms, "Shhhh, Rachie. You're okay. You apologized and Emma is not worse for the wear. I'm just worried about how angry you got. There's a lot going on in there that's been bottled up for so long, love. You're only 11, but you have so much to be angry about, baby. That must be hard."

Rachel bunched up her mom's shirt and let out another sob. "Let's lay down bug." Shelby whispered.

Carefully she adjusted herself to stretch her legs out with her back on the armrest of the couch. Rachel still laid on her mother's chest, but now her mother could rub her back and her tummy just the way she liked it. "I"m here baby. Just let it out." The mother spoke softly as tears streamed down Rachel's face. Eventually the 11 year old had tired herself out and all that were left were small hiccups.

"I'm proud of you, for telling me everything you did today. For trusting me."

"I trust you a lot mama." Rachel nuzzled her head into Shelby's chest and grabbed the string on her mother's hoodie to play with, "It-it's just hard sometimes because my brain just thinks so much and I don't know what's true and what's not."

Three kisses were dropped on the child's head. "You know what used to help me when I'd get really upset?"

"W-what?"

"I used to sing and play the piano. It would always calm me."

"I-I don't know how to play piano." Rachel said sadly.

"I can teach you, or I can get you to go to classes. And you have a beautiful voice baby...would you like that?"

"Piano sounds like a lot of fun. Then I can be like you." Rachel smiled up at her mom before laying her head back down.

How in the hell, as a mother, was she not supposed to fall right into the palm of this little girl's hand?

"Well then." Shelby gave her two maternal pats to her tush, hiding just how adorable she thought that last comment was, "I'll look into it."

She thought about bringing up the idea of therapy, but just couldn't bring herself to do it at that moment. She'd finally managed to calm the demons in her daughter's mind, and Rachel was finally peaceful as she absentmindedly pulled and pushed on the string of her hoodie.

Shelby knew the conversation had to happen though. She pulled Rachel closer towards her and hugged her tight. As if the hug could bat away any wayward thoughts her daughter might've been having at that moment.

"Do you think if I count to 3 it'll help?" Rachel asked not bothering to look up, sort of just rattling off what was on her mind.

"When you're getting upset?"

The girl nodded, "People always say count to 3 for everything. So maybe if I give myself 3 seconds it'll help….It's kinda hard to do that though."

"I think that sounds like a great idea, bug. I can remind you when I see you getting worked up. It might save you a few trips to the timeout chair and those occasional spanks I have to give your bum." She gave her one firm pop that made the girl squirm.

A blush immediately rose to Rachel's face, "Mama!" She whined, embarrassed, "That hurt!" It didn't really.

Shelby chuckled to herself, but soothed where she had popped the girl, "I'm sorry baby. All better?" She asked after rubbing soothing circles onto the girl's bottom.

Honestly, it had been all better 20 seconds ago, but Rachel wasn't complaining. She loved all the attention she got. "Mhhmmm." She nodded.

"Good." Shelby cooed into the girl's hair.

"Mama," Her words muffled by Shelby's shirt, "Do you think I'll ever feel normal?"

"You don't have to be 'normal' whatever that means." Shelby reminded her.

"But I want to feel like everyone else."

Shelby knew what her baby meant. To feel a part of something. To feel accepted.

"I'm sure you will."

"But when?" There was almost desperation in her little one's voice and it hurt the mother to hear. "I wanna feel like Emma, and Lewis, and Andrea do. They don't think about everything the way I do."

Shelby took a deep breath, her heart dropping to her stomach at her daughter's words, "Well, can you tell me how you're feeling right now, honey?"

Rachel stayed quiet for a moment.

Thinking. Feeling.

"Safe." She hummed, "Warm."

She placed her hand atop Shelby's chest. The woman watched her daughter's gentle movements, her eyes watering in the process.

Rachel loved feeling her mama's heartbeat. Whenever she'd sleep with her mom, her hand would always inevitably end up on Shelby's chest.

"Loved." The girl finished, "I always feel loved when you hold me."

Shelby let out broken teary words, "Oh, bug."

The woman let herself cry this time. Rachel looked up at her worried. It was rare when her mother cried more than a few tears.

"I just love you so much, Rachie. That's why I'm crying." She admitted, "You are my world, Rachel. You've become my world, and we're gonna get you through this, okay?"

There was so much resolve in her mother's voice that the 11 year old couldn't help but believe her. It was as if there was no other option.

"I'm going to do everything I can to help you overcome all those thoughts and feelings. Because you deserve all the happiness you can get."

Shelby wiped her tears, "Rach, I think it's time we take you to talk to someone."

"Like a therapist?" Rachel uttered nervously, "Lindsay used to tell me I need therapy. She would say it whenever I would get really mad and it never seemed like a good thing. She would, you know, make fun of me and stuff."

"It's a good thing Rach. They're supposed to help you work through those thoughts you have."

"But I have you." Rachel sat up atop her mother's legs facing her mother's upper body. The woman was still outstretched, so she sat criss cross applesauce, "I don't wanna talk to someone else."

"It might be hard at first." Shelby confessed, "But they've gone to school for this. They know how to give people strategies and ideas to help them work through what's bothering them. They'll work with you, Rach. And of course you and I are still going to talk. That will never change, kiddo."

Rachel didn't look convinced, "What if, what if they're mean or I don't like the person?"

"We can try someone else."

"Will you go in with me?"

"I can go in with you the first few times."

That alarmed the girl. She wasn't sure if she liked that idea. "Why not all the time?"

"Well the therapist might want to work with you one on one."

"But, but I don't want to be alone with them."

Shelby nodded, "Okay. I hear you. How about we take it one step at a time? We try a therapist out, and you tell me how you're feeling about it afterwards?"

The girl bit her lip as she thought, "O-okay. I guess." She laid back down on her mom rather abruptly, "But I'm just gonna stay here for now."

The woman chuckled, again reminded of the girl's youthfulness. They'd just finished negotiating therapy, and here Rachel was seconds later laying atop her and playing absentmindedly with the ring on Shelby's hand.

"Mommy?"

"Hmmm?"

"Can you rub my tummy again?"

' _Forever my baby you'll be.'_ The mother thought as she put a hand on Rachel's stomach. The bedtime book's words rang true.

They stayed there in silence, but Shelby realized that her daughter was going to end up falling asleep very soon, and she preferred for her to take a bath or a shower before she took a nap. She had gotten dirty with sweat and dirt while playing soccer outside and was still in that set of clothes.

"Rach," She nudged her slightly, "Let's get you in a shower before you take a nap."

The girl groaned, not wanting to do that at all. She was already halfway to dreamland! There was something about her mom's heartbeat that relaxed her to no end.

"I know."Shelby sympathized, "But you're dirty, bug. And I want you clean before you nap."

"Mommy." She complained, "Later, please?"

The woman stuck to her guns. She easily picked the small framed preteen up into her arms, "No ma'am. Let's go."

Rachel squirmed but didn't try and move from her mom's hold. She held onto her mom's neck and let her do all the work as they walked up the stairs. Well, as Shelby walked up the stairs, and Rachel laid her head comfortably on the woman's shoulders.

'Her mama was strong.' Rachel thought.

Strong in more ways than one.

Shelby moved them into the bathroom in her room. She patted the girl's back and gently bounced her once, hoping to slightly rouse her, "Shower or bath, love?"

"Shower." Rachel whispered in her sleepy haze, not bothering to lift her head up. They were quicker.

"Okay, shower it is." She delicately sat the girl on the sink and put Rachel's long hair up in a bun, "You can just wash your body, and we'll worry about you hair later….Lift up your arms baby. Let's get these sweaty clothes off you."

The woman then stood the small preteen up and pulled her shorts down as well. "Step out of your shorts, bug."

Rachel did so, then sat on the toilet lid as Shelby got the water ready.

"There you go Rach. Good girl." She kissed her forehead, "In you go, and then you can take a nap on my bed, okay? I'll bring you in some clothes."

"Can I wear your college shirt?" It was always the best to be wrapped in something that smelled like her mom.

"Of course kiddo."

Shelby waited until Rachel went into the shower before leaving the bathroom. She didn't want the girl to stay on the toilet lid and fall asleep right there. She wouldn't put it past her girl.

…. …. …...

Shelby had gone back up to her bedroom 10 minutes later to check if the girl was out, and could hear the water turning off. She waited on her bed for the girl and sure enough Rachel came out, clothed only in her mama's NYU tshirt and Minnie Mouse panties. She rubbed her eyes with her fist, they were ready to close at any moment.

"I brought Clifford." Shelby held him out towards her as Rachel clambered onto the bed. The girl picked him up and held him tightly to her chest, "Thanks mama."

"You're welcome love."

"Come on sleepy girl, nap time." Shelby cooed, helping settle the girl comfortably into the bed. And Rachel didn't have to be told twice. She'd been craving that nap for a while now. And all the talking with her mom had tired her out.

For a second Rachel wondered if Emma and Santana still took naps. She knew Lewis and Andrea did. Her grandma had put them down for a nap after they were being 'grumpy gusses'' like her grandpa had so funnily put it. They protested but sure enough the two quickly fell asleep. That made sense though, they'd just turned 8. Rachel was 12 in three months.

Luckily her mother's gentle hands running through her hair and humming pushed the questions away. Rachel didn't care. She would nap with her mom forever if it meant feeling cherished and protected the way she did right now.

But what the brunette didn't know is that in that moment Santana had coincidentally just woken up from a nap herself.

The Latina had finally lost her resolve and left her room to go downstairs. She found her mom reading in the living room. She surreptitiously sat by her mom's side quietly. Maribel put her book down and looked to her daughter.

"Que paso Sani?"

Santana just shook her head, "Nothing. I'm just...bored in my room. I already cleaned it, plus the bathroom and folded all the clothes like you wanted me too."

Maribel smiled proudly, "Good. You can read a book here with me if you'd like."

The 12 year old frowned. Her voice close to a whine, "I don't wanna read mami." Her eyes watered, and the woman knew that her _princesa_ was tired, else she wouldn't have been on the verge of tears like she was now.

"What do you want to do?"

"I don't know." She pouted, "I'm bored and you won't watch a movie with me." The girl sniffled.

Ahhh. They were back to this.

"Well lay here with me, and I'll read to you. I'll even start from the beginning."

Santana looked at the book in her mom's lap, _100 Años de Soledad. 100 Years of Solitude._

Santana loved it when her mother read anything in Spanish to her. It always sounded so pretty and peaceful.

Then she remembered making fun of Rachel for her mom reading to her, and immediately felt bad. In that moment Maribel reading to her sounded lovely. How could she have been such an asshole?

"O-okay." She responded, moving to lay her head on her mom's lap, grabbing the throw blanket on the couch in the process. Maribel waited patiently.

The mother adjusted the blanket around Santana, tucking it in just the way her daughter liked it. "Comfortable bebe?"

Santana curled herself in to make herself smaller, "Yeah mami."

"Good." And so she opened the book and held it with one hand as she placed the other on her daughter's side.

" _Muchos años después,"_ Maribel began, " _frente al pelotón de fusilamiento, el coronel Aureliano Buendía había de recordar aquella tarde remota en que su padre lo llevó a conocer el hielo."_

" _Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice."_

It was her mother's soft, poetic reading voice that finally put the fussy preteen to sleep.

It also didn't take long for Rachel to succumb to her tiredness as she laid with her own mom. Within five minutes Rachel's eyes had closed, her breathing had evened out, and Clifford was snug to her face.

Shelby watched her daughter sleep. Rachel looked younger than usual and that was saying a lot for the already youthful 11 year old.

She wished she could hold this moment in her memory forever. Her daughter wouldn't always look this young. She wouldn't always take naps cuddled into her mother's bosom. She wouldn't always wear cartoon printed undies that peeked through her sleeping shirt almost every time, or hold her red stuffed dog so tight to her as she slept.

And for the last time that day Shelby shed a few more tears for the sheer beauty and innocence of the little girl snoring softly next to her. A little girl whose hand was sat atop her chest, feeling her mother's heartbeat. The tune that made her feel safe, feel warm, and of course, loved.


	12. Something's Brewing

Shelby looked out the window above her kitchen sink as she sipped on her fresh coffee in peace. The sun was just peeking out and the woman could tell it was going to be a colder than usual day out. Winter was reaching its coldest days. She'd have to make sure that Rachel dressed warmly enough.

She took in the moment and the aroma of her dark brew. It was in these times of solitude that the mother reflected on how quickly her life had changed. It wasn't too long ago that her whole life was dedicated to her career. Days were spent pouring over practices, students, and lesson plans. And although her heart ached for her daughter, the woman never thought she'd be given the opportunity to raise her.

Now her life wasn't just hers. It was her life and Rachel's. It was her job to make sure her tiny mini me was fed, clothed, and emotionally well.

Shelby sighed, feeling like she hadn't been doing a very good job at the latter. Her poor little girl had gone through so much before her and even now with her she was unable to shield her from the bullies at school.

'Some mother.' She muttered to herself.

' _You are doing just fine Shelly." Shelby's sister's voice rang in her head, "You may not see it, but Rachel has grown leagues in your care. We can't protect them from everything, and that's okay, as long as you're there to pick them up.'_

Another sip of coffee, and one last sigh.

She turned to look at the oven clock, and decided it was time to wake her kiddo up.

"Wake up sweetheart. It's time to get ready for school." Shelby whispered gently, rubbing the sleeping girl's back to rouse her.

Rachel slowly blinked her eyes open and groaned, curling herself into a smaller ball at the movement of her mother pulling on her blanket.

"C'mon Rach."

"Mommy no." Rachel grumbled into her pillow, "Don't wanna."

Shelby rolled her eyes.

"Do you feel sick?" She inquired, though really she knew nothing was wrong.

A shake of the head, "Don't wanna go mom." Rachel whined, starting to wake up more, but pulling the sheet closer to her. It was so cold outside of her covers! Why was her mama pulling on them like that?

And plus she didn't feel like facing all that school would throw her. She didn't want to deal with the aftermath of last week.

And Shelby understood this, but she couldn't leave Rachel alone at home, and she certainly couldn't take her to school with her. Her job as teacher, coach, and mentor to other teachers was far too demanding to have an 11 year old by her side on top of it. Even as cute and adorable as said 11 year old was.

The mother checked the time. She needed to get Rachel up in the next few minutes if they wanted to stay on schedule. She had to be at school early today since she'd promised to tutor a few students for their upcoming exam.

"Rachel, honey," She patted her baby's upturned bottom twice, "Sit up, please." Her voice became slightly stern, enough for the child to know that she meant business. And so the 11 year old did, though rather uneagerly.

Rachel's hair was askew as she rubbed at her left eye with a fist. She gave her mother a small glare, not happy about being forced to sit up at all.

"I know you're nervous about school because of what happened last week, love. But you have to face it at some point."

Rachel frowned. She hadn't exactly expected her mother to change her mind. She'd asked her the day before if she could stay home and the answer was no, but she still felt butterflies in her stomach and nothing would change the fact that she was nervous.

"How 'bout this?" Shelby added when all her daughter did was drop her shoulders in resignation and blink back the beginning of tears. "If you feel overwhelmed, or if something happens, I want you to take three deep breaths and think of one happy thing."

"Like what?"

"Well what's happened this month that's made you the happiest?"

Rachel bit her lip in thought, "That time we went to Aunt Carrie's house and I got to play soccer with my cousins and they didn't make fun of me and Lindsay told me she loved me and missed me before we left."

 _Oh God Shelby don't cry this early in the morning._

"Okay." Shelby smiled softly and pressed a hand on her daughter's cheek, "I want you to try and remember that feeling then, when you were over at your cousins."

"And what if it doesn't work?"

"If you feel like it didn't work and school is unbearable then you can call me. But only then. I don't want to find out that you're just faking it or else you'll get yourself into some trouble."

Rachel liked that her mother was giving her an out if things got too hard. It made the idea of going to school a little bit less daunting. And so with a long sigh she agreed to get up and face the day.

... ... ...

Maribel woke up almost automatically. Her body had long been accustomed to getting up earlier than her child and husband. She enjoyed the moments of peace before the craziness of the day. Looking to her left she smiled at the sight in front of her and chose to stay in bed for a moment to take it in. Santana, clad in her polar bear PJs, was snuggled deeply into her father's side while one of his arms laid protectively across her.

Santana's father had come back from a four day medical conference the night before and the poor girl was racked with nerves about how her dad would react to what she'd done to Rachel.

She'd refused to go down and greet him, choosing to stay occupied in her room, but the father was no fool.

 _'She's avoiding you.' Maribel said placing a cup of water by his side._

 _"Ya se. (I know.)" He shook his head at his daughter's antics, "I'll go up in a few."_

 _Santana dreaded the knock that she was sure to come, and five minutes later her father's heavy hand hitting her wooden door was exactly what came._

 _"Come in." She mumbled, closing her laptop and hiding her head in her hands, atop her knees. She hoped her dad would have just gone to bed, letting her be. Even if that meant missing out on quality time with him._

 _"Ven aca m'hijita."_

 _Santana didn't even have to look up to know where her dad was sitting. On her desk chair. He liked to sit there whenever he wanted to talk to her, or worse punish her._

 _The girl trudged off the bed slowly._

 _"Papi, mami already-"_

 _"I just want to have a conversation." He moved her in between his legs, her argument cut short and left hanging loosely in the air. She sighed knowing that was her dad's way of saying you have no other option._

 _The father gently placed his hands on either side of her waist. Meanwhile Santana kept her eyes on right on Santiago. His dark brown eyes._

 _"When you called me to tell me what happened I was really disappointed in you."_

 _The preteen hung her head shamefully. Here we go again._

 _"Yo se papi. I'm sorry."_

 _He studied her. Her small lip pout and guilt ridden face. She was never good at hiding her emotions._

 _"But your mami told me how you apologized to Rachel." His finger hooked under her chin so they could lock eyes once more, "It came from the heart, didn't it?"_

 _"I really was-well-am sorry."_

 _"I know you are Sani. Pero, your actions will speak much louder than your words. Me entiendes? You have a lot to prove now. And trust to rebuild. Both to Rachel and your mother and I."_

 _"I promise dad."_

 _"Don't promise me." He spoke sternly, "Show me."_

 _Santana nodded dutifully, though she knew she needed to get her shit together and really hold her tongue. Any bad report from school to her parents was sure to land her in hotter water now. And trust me, the water was already pretty damn hot._

 _"Yes sir."_

 _"Now how 'bout you, mami, and me go out for some ice cream?"_

 _The girl's eyes gleamed, "But you're not tired papi?"_

 _"Not too tired to spend time with you."_

 _She leaned in and hugged her dad tight. The father reciprocating the gesture._

"My inseparable two." Maribel whispered to herself looking at her loves. She took a deep breath and sat up. The bed slightly creaking.

"M-mami?"

Her daughter's sleepy whisper broke through the silence.

"Hola bebe." Maribel whispered back, hoping not to wake Santiago. He needed all the sleep he could get.

"Are you getting up mami?" Santana asked her eyes still closed and heavy with sleep.

The mother leaned over and kissed her daughter's forehead, "Si San. But you sleep. You still have an hour before you have to get ready for school."

Santana only nodded and turned back into her fast asleep father.

…. …. …

"I love you sweetheart." Shelby called out to her daughter from the inside of her car.

Rachel shifted her backpack higher and gave her mom a weary smile, trying hard not to jump right back into the car, "Bye mom." She waved and watched her mother drive off. The girl's only solace was the fact that Amanda was suspended until Wednesday.

She walked quickly into the school after seeing some kids stare at her and whisper to one another. Of course by now the bathroom debacle had gone around.

"Hey."

She heard a voice from behind her. The girl turned around and saw Puck. It might not have been Kurt, but seeing his familiar goofy face made her smile.

"Hi Noah."

The boy eagerly walked over to her and wrapped an arm around her, "I'm your bodyguard now. Cool?"

"I don't need a bodyguard." She rolled her eyes, although she did always feel less uneasy with Noah around.

"Hell yeah you do. And I'm it. You can't tell me no because I'm not accepting it."

"Whatever Noah. You are so weird sometimes."

He shrugged taking it as a success that Rachel didn't put up a bigger argument, but not liking her sullen demeanor, "Are you alright Rach?"

It was rare that he called her by her name. She looked over at him and sighed. Noah, though foolish, did care about her. Of that she was sure. "I don't wanna be at school today. Everyone knows what happened."

"Screw everyone. They'll get over it, and if they say something I'll just punch them. Besides Amanda's an asshole and not a lot of people like her anyways besides her friends."

"Rachel! Wait!" They heard someone yell from behind.

Quinn.

"I'm glad you came to school." The blonde smiled, "And I wanted to tell you that if anyone tries messing with you they're gonna have to go through me."

"Sorry Quinn, but I'm her bodyguard." Puck interrupted.

"Well, you can have two." Quinn said elbowing Puck, making him hunch forward and clutch his side, "Fuck Q. That hurt."

Rachel giggled at the interaction.

"Boys are babies." Quinn joked, taking the place of Puck and putting an arm around Rachel.

"I think I saw Kurt in the choir room." Quinn added, "Let's go?"

"Ugh. That room is for pansies." Puck complained, "let's go get breakfast."

"I already ate." Both girls said simultaneously.

"And it's not for pansies!" Rachel argued, "You're just too dimwitted to appreciate art."

The feisty 12 year old boy rolled his eyes, "Whatever that means I'm pretty sure you just insulted me."

"She def did." The blonde chimed in, "But you're too _dimwitted_ to get it."

Puck narrowed his eyes, "Sooooo….dumb. You're calling me dumb."

"Just a little bit." Rachel joked with a smile that she hadn't expected to feel on her face that morning.

The boy shrugged his shoulders, "Eh. Puckerman men were never known for their brains. Anyway I'm gonna grab breakfast before they close it up. Catch y'all later!"

As Rachel walked with Quinn towards Kurt a swirl of questions circulated in her head.

Were they friends now? Or did Quinn just feel bad for her? The butterflies in her stomach had now disappeared though. And it was talking to not Kurt, but Quinn and Puck that helped her. Did that mean she could trust them the way she trusted Kurt now?

"Earth to Rachel!" Came Kurt's voice.

"Huh?"

"God, you always daydream, girl." The flamboyant boy harrumphed, "I was waiting for you for five ever!" He didn't miss a beat as he turned to look at the other girl, "Quinn are you joining us?"

The blonde smirked, "I guess."

"We're not too uncool for you?" He further pushed, "Wait, where's Santana?"

Rachel turned rather quickly to face the taller girl. Yes, where was Santana?

 _Santana had entered the kitchen of her home not yet dressed for school._

" _Santana Lopez." Maribel chided, "You are going to be late for school if you don't get your little butt back upstairs and change. Why are you still in your pajamas? Your father is the one that's to take you to school and he'll be down any minute."_

 _The preteen eyed her mother from the archway and looked down at her socked feet. She didn't say anything, but slid over shyly to where her mother was leaning on the kitchen island._

 _Maribel rose an eyebrow unimpressed by her daughter, but also slightly confused. Her girl was not one to be shy, especially with her._

 _The 12 year old cuddled up to her side and hid her face in Maribel's side taking in a deep breath._

 _The mother obliged and put an arm around her. She suddenly understood what was happening._

" _M'hijita-"_

" _Mami, quiero ir contigo. (I want to go with you.)" Santana pleaded in a whisper pushing her face into her mother's bosom, "I don't wanna go to school."_

 _Maribel frowned and held her daughter tighter, feeling the weight of motherhood on her shoulders. "Todo me va salir bien, princesa. I'll be okay. Don't you worry. I'd rather you go to school and be with friends and not worry about me."_

 _Santana shook her head stubbornly, grabbing a hold of her mother's shirt._

" _No mami. I wanna be with you. What if they find something?"_

" _They won't." Maribel assured her. The cancer had been in remission for a while, and the doctors were positive that they caught it on the onset._

 _Santana pushed herself off her mom, angry, "But you don't know that! And papi's not coming to your appointment this time because he has that dumb surgery and I don't want you to be alone mami because what if they do find something and you're there by yourself?! Please let me go with you. Please!"_

 _The mother sighed deeply and went to pull her daughter in for a hug but the girl took a step back. She took a deep breath._

" _You and papi always say they won't find anything. But you didn't expect them to find anything last time and they did. And everything was scary for such a long time!"_

 _Maribel swallowed the lump in her throat, "Santana Lopez, stop all of that right now and come here this instant."_

 _Maribel knew her daughter was hiding behind the anger._

 _The girl huffed but did as she was told. But rather than a scolding she felt her mother pull her in for a deep hug. "I know it was scary for you princess. I was scared too."_

 _The preteen hid her face in her mother's neck and felt hot tears hit her eyes._

" _Shhhh, mi nina. Shhh." Maribel kissed the top of her head over and over, trying hard not to cry herself. "Calmate bebe."_

 _Santana hated this. She felt 9 years old all over again. Every time her mother had a check up with the doctor all the same feelings of before came bubbling back._

" _You can come with me, but I'm dropping you off at school right after, okay? I don't wanna hear any whining about it."_

" _Si mami." Santana replied, "I'll be good. Promise."_

 _The mother smiled fondly at her worried little girl. "Come here bebe." Maribel spoke softly and patted her lap, knowing that her daughter needed some reassurance. The preteen blushed, but slowly clambered sideways onto her lap wanting to be as close to Maribel as possible and happy that her mother had offered the comfort. She then remembered how close she was to losing her. More tears._

" _Mi nina preciosa." Maribel cooed holding her girl tightly and rocking her, just like when she consoled her during those horrible moments two years ago, "Mami's still here. I'm not going anywhere for a long while."_

 _Santana clung to her mother's shirt allowing herself to feel small and protected in her mom's arms._

 _Santiago walked into the scene knowing exactly why their daughter was wrapped up in his wife's arms._

 _Maribel gave him a weak look and kissed the girl's head once more. She still had to take a shower, get dressed, and put on some makeup before her doctor's visit which would be in an hour and a half._

 _Fully aware of this, Santiago walked over and bent down to be eye level with his daughter whose face was hidden in her mother's chest, "M'hijita, mami needs to get ready. How 'bout you sit with me and we let her go do that?"_

 _Santana moved her head from her mother's chest and looked up at her mami's eyes. Maribel fixed the hair that had matted around her cheeks, "20 more minutes and I want you to get ready too, okay princesa?"_

 _Maribel helped her off with a soft pat to her thigh, "Go watch some TV with Papi, Sani."_

 _In the mornings, Santiago would always watch some news and answered emails before going into the hospital. But today he turned on the TV, let the commentators talk in the background and substituted his laptop for his child._

" _I love you mi nina." He told her before she cuddled into him._

"Her mom had a doctor's appointment, and she's going with her. She'll be back in the afternoon I think."

Rachel was confused. Why would tough as nails Santana want to accompany her mom to the doctor? She understood if she had a doctor's appointment, but it wasn't even her it was her mother. The doctor's office was the most boring place ever! Last time she'd gone there for a check up she'd ended up leaning on her mother's arm and falling asleep out of boredom

Everyone around her though, even Kurt seemed to understand and continue on.

"Does she always do that?" The curious 11 year old asked, "Isn't that kinda weird?"

Kurt and Quinn gave each other a look and turned back to Rachel, "You don't know about Sani's mom, huh?"

Rachel ducked her head a bit and shook her head, "N-no not really."

"She had cancer at the end of 4th grade."

The empathetic brunette felt her heart drop.

"Yeah Santana turned super emotional and would cry or get mad about anything in school." Kurt added.

"Her mom could've died but they did this crazy operation and it fixed her I guess." Quinn summarized, "But Sani's been super protective about her mom since then."

Rachel took a deep breath, "I didn't know that."

"Now you do." Quinn replied simply.

The thought would preoccupy the girl the rest of the day. A willingness to forgive the Latina seeding into her kind heart.

… …. …..

Shelby found herself looking at her phone throughout the day a lot more than usual. She'd been worried that her daughter might text or call her, but was pleasantly surprised when she didn't receive any distressing communication from her Rachel. A good sign by all means.

By the time she'd gotten over to Carrie's to pick her up around 6 pm in the evening, Shelby and Rachel had already had a brief conversation over the phone. Shelby could sense that something was bothering her daughter. She wasn't sure what it was though. Rachel had sworn up and down that nothing had happened at school, and that in fact she may have made new friends, but she still seemed slightly subdued.

"Hi Ms. Corcoran."

"Shelby, Linds. You can call me Shelby out of school."

The teen shook her head,"Hell no. Too weird. You're my teacher."

The woman chuckled, "Where's your mom and Rachel?"

"Mom, Ms. C is here!"

Shelby walked in and sat on the couch.

"Rach is showering. She was outside on the swingset and then started chasing sparky and getting dirty in the process."

"Hey Shelby! Rachel will be down soon. She was getting out of the shower just now." Carrie said coming down the stairs as her daughter flew right back up them.

"No worries. I'm in no hurry. I have some clothes for her in the car. Does she need any? Or does she have an extra set here?"

"She left a few shirts and a pair of pants.." Carrie mentioned placing a glass of water by Shelby.

Their conversation was cut short when Shelby's phone rang.

Her eyebrow raised at the name. Paul. The woman ignored the phone call, but Carrie was quick to catch on.

"Was it a ghost or something?"

The teacher laughed, "No. Not at all."

"Well your eyes almost bulged out of your sockets Shelbs."

"He's just-"

"Oh!" Carrie exclaimed, "A he."

"It's nothing...yet. And he hasn't called me, ever. So I wasn't expecting it."

"So why didn't you pick up?"

Shelby shrugged, "I don't need to complicate my life any further."

"But isn't love the best way to complicate it?"

"It's not love Carrie." Shelby huffed, "I'd hardly call the 'good morning, how are you' conversations we have over text love."

"Well if you don't give it a chance then you'll never know."

"I just got Rachel."

"It's been a few months, and she's acclimating well to you. Just...think about it. If you don't want to date now that makes sense, but if you like the guy maybe let him know that you'd love to see if something were to come of it in a few months when you feel like you're ready. Don't just ignore the guy and pin it on your daughter as the reason."

"Hi mom!"

"Speak of the devil." Carrie smiled.

Shelby was set to protest her point but stood up, Rachel's coat in hand, poised to hug her baby. Rehearsal days meant more of her evening away from her bundle of joy, and by the time she picked her up Shelby was ready to hold her daughter tight all night if she could.

The tiny brunette came down wearing a pair of faded purple pants and a white tshirt that had a single rose right in the middle of it. She quickly walked over and hugged her mother's middle, relishing in her mother's strong embrace.

Shelby bent down so she could be eye level with her kiddo, "Hey princess. Ready to go?" She gave her a kiss to her forehead.

Rachel nodded and looked into her mother's hazel eyes. She thought of what Quinn had told her about Santana's mother. She thought about how quiet and aloof Santana was the entire day with her friends, even with Quinn.

The 11 year old had given her a small wave and Santana returned it half heartedly and kept walking to class. She had wanted to say something like "I'm sorry that your mom got sick." but she felt like it would've just sounded stupid, after all it happened so long ago.

But now looking at her mom and the idea that something like that could happen to her terrified Rachel. She just got Shelby, losing her couldn't possibly be an option.

"Is everything okay, love?" Shelby asked when Rachel stared at her with wide, concerned eyes.

"Y-yeah, yeah. I'm okay mama. But can we watch Gilmore Girls tonight?"

"Of course. Go grab your backpack and put your shoes on so we can head out."

"Did she seem alright to you today?" Shelby asked Carrie as Rachel went back up to grab her things.

"She seemed just fine. Maybe just a little tired from all the running around she did outside. I almost put her in timeout for refusing to come back inside, but the idea of having to sit in silence was enough to get her tush in gear. I swear some days that girl has way too much energy."

Rachel came back down and laid her head on her mom's stomach. A sign that she was ready to go.

Shelby rubbed her daughter's back for a moment as Carrie smirked at her spitfire niece.

"Your aunt tells me you almost ended up in timeout Rachel?"

The preteen blushed a furious red as her mother looked down at her, clearly not impressed.

Goddamn it!

"Y-yes." She scuffed her shoe on the carpet. There was no point in lying about that one, "But I did what you said after all, aunt Carrie."

"You did." The woman agreed.

"See, I still followed directions mom."

Shelby chuckled, "Seems like it. I guess we'll let it slide."

 _Thank God._

"Let's go?" She helped Rachel into her coat and zipped it all the way up to the girl's chagrin. Rachel then looked to her aunt, "Bye aunt Carrie."

"Be good Rachel, don't give your mom a hard time tonight. I can tell you're overtired."

Rachel furrowed her eyebrows at her aunt, "I'm not tired!" She looked to Shelby, "Mama I'm not tired."

The 11 year old didn't want to be put to bed early. She wanted to spend as much time as she could with her mom!

"We'll see about that." Shelby joked lightly, "Come on, let's get you home."

Rachel huffed. Who was her aunt Carrie anyway to be saying that she was 'overtired?' whatever that meant.

…. …. …..

Shelby stared at her phone as she got the popcorn ready for them both. Paul had left her a voicemail and it was taunting her. Carrie's words playing in the back of her minds. She was not using Rachel as an excuse! It was legitimate. Wasn't it? The girl was so young, so vulnerable, still so needy. Adding a man to the mix was not feasible.

Or was it because she was still scared of entering a relationship? They take up so much time, so much energy. They require you to open up to a whole other human being. She'd already done that and it ended badly. Why would she put herself out there all over again?

But despite this back and forth Shelby still decided to listen to the voicemail after she put Rachel to bed which would be in about two hours. She'd sent the girl up to put on her pajamas already.

 _There's no harm in having a friendship with him right now._ She thought to herself.

When she got back to the living room Rachel already had the episode they left off on poised to play. She also had her Clifford locked in her arms as she leant her head on the armrest of the couch, her whole body curled into itself. A clear sign that the girl had clearly tired herself out.

 _Looks like I'll be carrying someone to bed tonight._

"I made us some popcorn, Rach." She sat by her and rested her hand on the girl's back. Rachel sat up slightly and moved to lean into her mother before pressing play on the remote,

"Thanks mom." She smiled.

This was the feeling she wanted to have for so many years to come. The safety and security of the woman sitting next to her. Shelby dropped a kiss on her daughter's head, unaware of what was going though Rachel's mind, but happening to do exactly what the 11 year old needed. Rachel snuggled in closer and sighed happily.

Unsurprisingly, by the end of the episode Rachel was already softly snoring.

"Alright, bug. Up we go." Shelby whispered scooping the preteen up, and placing an arm under the girl's bottom for support.

'Thank God you're little.' The woman mumbled.

She'd already carried Rachel like this plenty of times. Either to bed, for comfort, or simply because the girl asked for it. Her being small was definitely an advantage.

Once she got her daughter all tucked in Shelby got herself ready for bed, then laid down with a tired sigh. The school day had been long and she'd been grateful for the incident free, quiet evening she'd had with Rachel.

But she also hadn't forgotten about that voicemail. She kept staring at the red notification on her phone.

 _Open it you scaredy cat._

With a deep breath she pressed the voicemail and put it to her ear.

" _Hey Shelby, hope your day went well. Was sort of hoping you'dve picked up the phone, but also not too surprised. Guess I should stick to just texting you?"_

Shelby rolled her eyes at his attempt of a joke.

" _Anyways, totally not trying to sound stalkerish but you mentioned on Facebook once that you liked Toni Morrison. Well she's doing a talk about her newest book at a local bookstore here in town in two weeks, and well I was wondering if you wanted to go. Ummm, you know, not by yourself though. With me. I know you have Rachel and she's your priority. I would never try and mess that up. Just one date. Bit of a stretch maybe? But hey, I gotta shoot my shot. Hope you say yes. Have a good evening Shelby."_

"Well, fuck." Shelby groaned. Life certainly was complicated.

…. …. ….

Rachel sprung up from her bed, emitting a small scream and quickly covering her mouth to prevent herself from making a scene. She'd woken up from a horrid nightmare of attending her mother's funeral. She put a hand to her chest and felt her heart racing at a million miles per hour. Without giving it a second thought she threw her covers and jumped out of bed, heading straight for her mother's room. She needed to make sure Shelby was okay.

But her socked feet skidded to a halt at her mother's door.

 _Breathe Rachel._ She calmed herself down, not wanting to wake her mother up.

Carefully, she pushed open the door and tip toed in. She moved to her mother's bedside table where Shelby was facing and stayed silent, squinting her eyes trying to see her mom in the dark of the night. Then she heard it. She could hear Shelby's deep breathing.

 _She's breathing. Mama's okay._

Not wanting to have to go back to sleep alone after that, and wanting to make sure her mother stayed perfectly okay under her watchful 11 year old eyes, Rachel clambered onto the bed, but not before fixing the sheets around her mother first.

 _Don't want her to catch a cold._

When morning came Shelby woke up and felt small arms wrapped around her waist. Still clouded by sleepiness the woman was confused by the weight, but when she turned over she was met with her slumbering daughter.

Shelby realized that she must've been more tired than she thought. Usually, the woman was a light sleeper, someone coming into her bed should've at leased slightly roused her. But she sleepily smiled at the innocence that her baby still had when she slept.

The mother swore up and down Rachel still looked just like a baby when she slept. She brought her in closer breathing in her daughter's hair. Watermelon shampoo. She still had a few moments that she could spend snuggling her little one so she did exactly that.

Rachel instinctively gave out a content sigh and curled closer into the warmth.

Later on that morning Rachel woke up to the sound of her mother's shower turning on. The girl groaned at the noise and turned onto her belly. She tried to go back to sleep but found that she might as well get up. Her mom would have woken her up in about 45 minutes anyways.

She then caught sight of her mom's phone and decided to play candy crush while Shelby finished showering. Her own phone was currently in her room and she had no desire to get out of the warmth of her mother's bed.

In the midst of candy crushing reverie however a certain notification caught her eye and made her finger, which was mid-swipe, absolutely freeze.

'Just saw your text. Can't wait for it!"

The little girl's eyes narrowed. She couldn't help herself and quickly went into her mother's messages.

'Hey Paul. It's been a busy day. Sorry about the late reply." Her mother wrote, 'About your invitation, it's a tentative yes for me. Just don't be too disappointed if I change my mind. :)'

 _A SMILEY FACE?!_ Rachel thought to herself. "What the hell?" She mumbled.

She scrolled through and saw all the short conversations her mother had held with this Paul character and all of a sudden Rachel no longer wanted to stay in her mother's bed. She promptly put the phone back on its charger and left rather dramatically to go back to her room.

She laid down and huffed before pulling herself up when she heard her mother's shower turn off. The 11 year old closed her door and started to get dressed for school.

Why had her mom kept it a secret that she was talking to this guy? Plus, he seemed pretty dopey to the the small brunette anyway. Her mom didn't need that in her life!

"Dumb Paul." She muttered, angrily pulling her shirt on. Rachel did not like this at all, but she also knew that she couldn't let on just yet because she had definitely broken a rule when it came to respecting her mother's privacy.

Well, she was sure that it would come to light soon however because that "invitation" sounded like a date to the 11 year old. "Stupid, dumb Paul." She repeated once more pushing through her drawer to find a pair of pants to wear.

…. …. ….

Shelby came out of the shower wrapped in a towel. She was surprised when her daughter was no longer in her bed, but did not think much of it as she went to go change for the day.

She _was_ surprised however when she tried to open her daughter's door to check on her and found it locked. Rachel never locked her door. It wasn't a rule for her to keep it open, but it flustered the parent.

 _Maybe she's changing._

But it's not like Rachel hadn't changed in front of her before. Why the hell was her door locked?

The woman shook her head and knocked twice, "Rach, you awake love?"

Rachel turned towards the door with narrowed eyes. She pulled the pants she wanted to wear out of the drawer and threw them on the bed.

"Rachel?" Shelby knocked twice more a little harder, "Rachel, open the door please."

The girl sighed. She could hear the concern in her mom's voice and she didn't want to stress the woman out even if she was a little peeved at her. "Coming." She said loud enough for the woman to hear.

The door opened slowly. Shelby wasn't even greeted with a 'good morning,' instead the girl just gave her a tight smile and turned back around. The mother narrowed her eyes at the pantied tush that sauntered away from her.

Not wanting to leave her daughter alone just yet she decided to sit down on the girl's bed.

"Morning, Rachel."

"Good morning." Her girl politely responded.

Shelby watched as her daughter pulled on her pants.

"Sweetheart, come here."

Rachel eyed her mom and walked over to her slowly. She was going to sit down next to her but Shelby gently moved her in front of her. Shelby placed her hands on the girl's hips and smiled at her gently. "Are you alright this morning, bug? I felt you in my bed, then you disappeared on me after I got out of the shower."

Rachel looked down as she watched her mom zip up her pants for her and button the top. Red tinged her cheeks by the mixture of her mother's question and her actions. Two pats on her bottom indicating she'd finished the task.

"I-I had a bad dream last night." Rachel confessed, not able to lie when her mother was being so nice to her.

"Baby girl why didn't you wake me up?"

Rachel shrugged and tried to look away to avoid the question. Though being in between her mom's legs meant it was impossible for her to get away.

"No ma'am. Look at me." Shelby spoke softly but sternly, "You can wake me up anytime."

The brunette nodded, "I was okay again when I laid next to you though. I didn't have to wake you up."

"I just want to know that you don't feel scared to wake me up if you need to."

"I know that." Rachel assured her. Shelby looked into her daughter's eyes reading her emotions. The mother pulled her in for a hug, "I'm sorry you had a bad dream, bug."

Rachel wanted to shy away from the embrace but couldn't get herself to do so. Sure, she was feeling upset about this Paul guy, but she also loved her mama so much and had a newfound appreciation for the fact that Shelby was in good health. She hugged Shelby tighter. "Love you mommy." Her whimpered voice cracked. She hadn't realized that tears were already forming in her dark brown eyes.

"Hey now. Why are we crying? Hmm?"

"I-you-you were-you- in my dream, were-"

"Okay." Shelby pulled Rachel gently to sit down next to her and pushed some hair behind the girl's ear. She wasn't sure what Rachel was going to say but wanted to make sure that she was ready to comfort her baby girl.

"Go ahead sweetheart. You're okay."

"You were dead!" Rachel blurted, "I was at your funeral, and I was so scared that something happened to you!"

"Oh, kiddo."

Rachel leaned into her mom and breathed in her scent, "I just wanted to make sure you were okay. It scared me."

"Of course it scared you bug. But I promise I'll live for much, much longer." She kissed the girl's forehead, "You're stuck with me for a long while."

Rachel laid her head on her mother's crisply ironed navy blue pants, "I want you to live forever."

The mother chuckled, "Well then I'd be an old little cripply thing if I lived forever."

Rachel giggled, "Then I would carry you like you carry me."

"That sounds really nice. That means I could be the lazy one."

I'm not lazy!" Rachel protested.

"Suurrreee." Shelby teased.

There was a comfortable silence before Rachel took a deep breath and decided to be completely honest with Shelby, "Mom?"

"Hmmm?"

"...Quinn told me about Santana's mom yesterday. About her having cancer."

Two things crossed Shelby's mind in that moment. One being how did two 11 year olds even bring that up in conversation? And exactly how bad did that comment stress her daughter out?

"That's why I dreamed that." Rachel almost whispered.

Shelby let out a long sigh, "That was a very scary and hard time for Santana. I'm sorry it got you so worried bug."

Rachel's breath shuddered, "What if, what if you get sick? I just got you. I don't wanna lose you."

The mother felt her heart constrict. "Baby you won't lose me."

"But they didn't think Santana's mom was gonna get sick."

Shelby frowned. Her daughter had a point. Disease didn't really discriminate. "You're right. The likelihood of it happening is really low though. I'm in perfect health."

Rachel sat up criss cross applesauce to face her mom, "But how long ago did you go to the doctor for a check up?"

"About 5 months ago." Shelby answered patiently, willing to answer every inquiry in order to allay her daughter's worry, "And everything turned out just fine."

"You didn't even have high cholesterol or diabetes? I hear that happens in old people."

Shelby's mouth dropped, "Rachel! I'm not old!"

That one stung. She was most certainly not old. Her mom and dad were old. Not her!

Her mom's reaction made the girl giggle once more, "Well you're older than me."

"But I'm not elderly. Jesus, kiddo! And no I did not have high cholesterol or diabetes."

Rachel thought for a moment before speaking up once more, "When are you gonna go to the doctor again?"

"I have my next scheduled appointment in about a month." Shelby grabbed Rachel's hands gently and squeezed them, "Ladybug, you can even come with me to the doctor and listen in on everything and ask her all the questions you'd like. Would that make you feel better?"

The 11 year old nodded and laid her head back on Rachel's arm, "Yeah, yeah, I wanna go with you."

"Alright love. We'll do just that."

Although Rachel had gotten up earlier than expected their talk had taken up time and the mother knew she should get started on breakfast soon so she stood up from the bed with one last gentle squeeze to her kiddo.

"Rachie, it's time for me to go downstairs if we want to make it out of here on time."

"Can't we just stay like this forever mama?"

"I wish kiddo."

She was halfway walking out when she turned to ask one last question, "Rach?"

"Yeah?"

"Is there a reason your locked your door?"

Yes. Because of stupid, dumb Paul.

"I was changing." She answered smoothly.

The woman sighed internally. Was her baby growing up already?

"Fair enough. Finish up getting ready, and make sure to wear your boots, it's cold outside."

Rachel pouted, "Aww, but mom I look funny in them!"

"You look just fine in them."

"They look like clown shoes on me!" She still argued.

"I'd rather you look like a clown then get sick on me."

"Mommy!" Rachel whined now, "That's mean."

A clear frown formed on her face as she crossed her arms in defiance.

"Little girl, I don't want to hear it." Shelby put her hand up to stop the whining. It was too early for it, "There's an easy and a hard way to do this Rach."

"Fine." Rachel grumped. She didn't want to push too many buttons now. "I'll put the dumb boots on."

 _Dumb like Paul._ She thought. Paul probably wore clown shoe boots too.

"Thank you little miss attitude."

…. …. …

 _TWO WEEKS LATER_

"She said she's going to some author's book talk." Rachel griped. She was sitting outside in the morning on one of the tables with Quinn, Puck, and Kurt. She'd just gotten into a tiff with her mother and she was not happy about it.

"Who the hell goes to author book talks?" Puck asked confused.

"That's not the point Noah." Kurt emphasized, "This is probably the date that she has with Paul."

"She never goes out on the weekend without me." Rachel bit the inside of her cheek to hide her frown. Saying that statement actually hurt a little, "It has to be him."

"Hey." The gang looked up to see Santana taking a seat next to them.

After the incident in the bathroom all those weeks ago, she'd distanced herself from Amanda but that meant losing the friends that ran in Amanda's circle as well.

Losing her group of friends was hard for the Latina, but she still had Noah and Quinn who now happened to hang out with Rachel and Kurt more and more often. Never in her 12 years did the sixth grader think that she'd be associating with the nerds as much as she was now.

Although, if she was begrudgingly honest with herself the pair weren't that bad. I mean, they had an obnoxious dramatic flair at times but they were alright most of the time.

Rachel eyed the tall girl as she took a seat by Quinn and Puck. She smiled tightly at Santana, both still awkwardly dancing around their insecurities with one another.

"So what happened, did you ask her if it was a date?" Kurt asked.

" _Why can't I go with you?" Rachel asked her mom as they ate breakfast. Shelby had just told her that on Saturday things would look a little different because she'd be going with a friend to see one of her favorite authors at Politics and Prose._

" _You'll be bored to death Rach."_

" _No I won't." She countered._

" _Yes you will. Last time I took you with me to a work related meeting you almost got yourself into trouble, remember?"_

" _But I won't this time!" The girl argued, "I promise."_

 _Shelby sighed, "No baby. I'm sorry. You and I can do something before since it's in the evening, but I'll drop you off at your aunt's house while I'm there. And I'll pick you up at 9 on the dot."_

" _Who's your friend then?"_

 _Shelby knew this question might come up. She slowly got up and took her bowl into the sink, "An old friend I've known for a while."_

 _The girl pushed her cereal bowl away from herself and shot up, stalking towards the stairs, not fighting or saying one more word to her mother. Shelby took a deep breath._

" _That bowl better be put in the dishwasher before we leave for school, young lady!" Shelby called towards her disappearing form._

 _Rachel, however, was not in the mood to follow her mother's directives so when it came time for them to leave she went straight to the door only to be met with Shelby's imposing form pointing right at the kitchen._

" _Put the bowl away Rach."_

" _Let me go with you on Saturday and I will." The child sassed rather boldy. Her mother's eyebrow shot up and it made Rachel gulp._

 _Shelby realized that this had quickly become a battle of wills and she was not going to play this game with Rachel. Her girl had another thing coming if she thought she could try and get her way in such a deviant manner._

" _Rachel Corcoran." Her voice became stone cold, "You can be upset at my decision, but you cannot begin to disrespect me or the rules in this house. We clean up after ourselves here, and you haven't done that. Now, I'm giving you one more chance and that's it. Go pick up that bowl."_

 _The 11 year old tightened her fists. She could play this game. If her mom wanted to be stubborn than she would be too!_

 _Shelby shook her head at her defiant child. The same child who still loved bedtime stories and to be carried around by mommy, but seemed to believe she was an adult currently._

 _Rachel rooted herself to the floor refusing to move when her mother tried to grab her arm._

 _Shelby had no time for it, so in one swift motion she gave her daughter a stinging swat that finally caught the girl's complete attention, indignant eyes darting straight up at her mom._

" _You will either go now or when we come back from school, you are going straight into the corner where you will sit until you decide to stop being so capricious and do as you're told. You are 11 years old Rachel. You cannot throw a tantrum every time you don't get your way."_

 _And suddenly Shelby's words reminded the child of two people. Her daddies. How many times had they told her to stop being a baby? To stop acting like such a little girl? Is that what Shelby thought now too?_

 _Great Rachel. You're messing up!_

 _Embarrassed and upset at her mother's words Rachel scampered off trying to hide the tears that welled up in her eyes._

 _Shelby pinched the bridge of her nose. This was not going well. She knew first hand how much getting punished in the morning ruined the rest of the day, and felt bad that she'd done it to Rachel, but her sass and attitude was far too much._

 _Had she gone too far though? Should she have made that last comment? She was just so frustrated._

 _When Rachel finished her chore she grabbed her backpack from the floor and walked roughly past her mother and into the back of the car, immediately putting her headphones in and laying her head on the window._

 _Sometimes having a mom really sucked._

 _Meanwhile Shelby took her time locking the door to give herself a chance to cool off as well. She wanted to apologize to the girl, if only to get a smile out of her, but she had no reason to. Rachel needed that telling off._

" _I'm not a baby. Everyone says that I act like one. But I'm not a baby."_

 _It was the first thing Shelby heard within seconds of sitting down._

 _Shelby breathed in deeply and turned around. As over the attitude as she was, the mother in her could tell that Rachel had felt insulted by what had been said, and the last thing she wanted was to hurt her baby's feelings, even if said child was hell bent on making their morning quite hellish._

 _She watched as her daughter hardened herself and furiously looked away from her._

" _I don't think you act like a baby, Rach. I never said that." Shelby clarified, "I think you lost your temper and we have to get you to a point where you learn that there are consequences for that action"_

 _Rachel pulled her legs up onto the seat and hugged them, refusing to want to listen to her mother's point. All she cared to know and process was that her and her mom were mad at each other all because of dumb Paul. She unpaused her music and looked back out the window._

 _Welp, today already sucked._

 _The mother turned back, feeling frustration creep up her body. She was going to take the headphones away, but realized that was unnecessary overkill. If that would finally get Rachel to come down from her anger then so be it._

 _The car ride was silent aside from the hum of the radio and the faint sound of Rachel's music. The mother looked back occasionally. Rachel's deep frown never left her face. God, she wished they could just do the morning all over again._

 _Once at the school drop off zone the girl mumbled out a lame 'bye' as she got the hell out of the car not giving her mom an opportunity to kiss her cheek or say 'I love you.'_

 _Shelby had to admit, her daughter's slight pricked her maternal heart._

… …. ...

"I asked who it was and all she said was that it was an old friend. I can't believe she's lying to me."

"She's not lying Rach." Quinn pointed out with a shrug, "She's just not telling you yet."

"No way." Santana scoffed, "That's fucking lying."

Quinn gave Santana a shove, "Shut up San." Then turned back to Rachel, "She's probably not sure if he's like the real deal so doesn't wanna mention him yet."

"Yeah, my mom brings hella guys over all the time. And it kinda sucks." Noah added.

Santana saw the little sad eyes that Rachel donned and she hated that it made her heart hurt a bit for her.

"So where's that book talk anyway?" Kurt asked.

"Somewhere called Politics and Prose."

"That's kinda near my house. Like a 20 minute walk." Santana casually said and it made Kurt's eyes widen in scheming excitement.

"Well that's perfect!" The boy blurted out.

"What're you talking about, nerd?" Santana rolled her eyes. Why he always so damn loud?

"Now hear me out." He began, "I know you and Rachel aren't exactly best friends here, BUT what if we all come over to your place on Saturday, and then head over to the bookstore and see who exactly your mom is with Rach?"

"Yo, sneaking around. That sounds like hella fun." Puck nodded.

Quinn, ever the logical thinker, looked skeptical, "Yeah, let's just show up to some old person event. We won't stand out at all. And not to mention that Ms. Corcoran will see us!"

Rachel stayed quiet. No, her and Santana weren't best friends. At all. But she supposed they were at least acquaintances if not by forced association now.

And the prospect of finding out the truth was very tempting. Although asking her mom seemed like a much less intricate way of doing so, but sixth grade minds did not even consider the option.

"Besides," Quinn kept going, "San's mom is strict and it's in the evening, it'd get too dark out."

"It's called being stealth Q. Like spies." Puck scoffed.

"No Puck, you dummy. We can just ask my mom to drive us to the Ben and Jerry's across the street and one or two of you hit up the book store while the rest of us wait." Santana said.

Oh damn it. Now she was invested too.

"That's even better! What do you say Rach?" Kurt asked.

Now it sounded even more doable to Rachel. "Would your mom mind if we all went over to your house Santana?"

"Are you kidding me? Quinn's always over at my place, and would be over the moon if she saw that I was hanging out with other people."

"W-would, would you be okay with that?"

Both girls looked at each other, while the others looked on. The quiet broke when the Latina finally shrugged, "Yeah, it's whatever."

"Well then, looks like we got ourselves some plans!" Puck exclaimed putting his arms around Rachel and Kurt.

 **Possible Shenanigans? Please review and tell me what you think! I love you all :)**


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